This is part 2 of my triology of Steve and Catherine. It began with 'Undoubtedly'.
I loved the parting scene of Steve and Catherine, even the awkwardness. This is my thought of what happens that moment and what might come next. I´d love to know what you think!
Merci beaucoup, mon chere ami Jane! I love your ideas!
Disclaimer: None is mine, all belongs to CBS.
Meet me halfway, right at the borderline
that's where I'm gonna wait, for you
I'll be lookin out, night'n'day
took my heart to the limit, and this is where I'll stay
I can't go any further than this
I want you so bad it's my only wish
(Black Eyed Peas)
Their eyes met and Catherine had to bite her lip to control her emotions. Right now, right here wasn´t the moment to lose it. She had just told Steve that she was transferred to NAVCENT and that her flight would leave in a few hours. She could tell from his reaction that he didn´t expect that when he entered her office, teasing her about being a bit overdressed for dinner.
But she had also seen him being aware of the fact that this could mean only one thing. He knew the Navy and he knew her, so the little frown on his face and the suddenly guarded look in his eyes told her that he knew something was up.
His eyes held hers and she saw the turmoil behind his mask of calmness. She wanted to reach out at easy the frown, smooth the lines around his lips, touch him. But she knew... she just knew she couldn´t. There were so many things she wanted to tell him and she felt her heart drop, felt like a cold hand was squeezing it hard. She didn´t know if she´d ever see him again. Maybe this was a goodbye, for good. Maybe this meant that they´d never see each other again. And he was standing there like a statue, telling her so much through only his eyes. But refused to touch her.
Catherine swallowed hard, clenching her hands to fists to keep herself from reaching out to him. Little did she know that Steve felt the same way, that his heart was beating hard and fast and he tried to digest what she had just told him. It couldn´t be. It just couldn´t be. He only got her back, he couldn´t let her go yet again.
And then she told him about Joe White, about the missing request to DoD and it took all her strength to not reach out.
'Damn Steve! You´re making this harder every minute. If this is your attempt to let me down gently, you´re failing big time!' she thought and couldn´t help the sad smile tugging at her lips.
Maybe this really was his way to end it gently because it had been hard enough to see each other with her being on board the USS Enterprise. But being send to NAVCENT on the other side of the globe would make it impossible. So he probably was right to let it end right then and there. To not touch her. To not kiss her. And to not tell her that he loved her.
Being an officer in the US Navy gave her strength enough to remain calm and to keep her emotions locked inside. She felt like he wouldn´t be able to handle any outburst and she didn´t want to embarrass herself. So she just looked at him while her inside screamed for him to hold her and to tell her that he loved her again, to kiss her one last time just so she could take this memory with her. Because she feared that memories would be all that was left for her.
And then he suggested to meet halfway, for dinner, maybe in Mumbai. And all she could reply was that she liked Indian food. She felt stupid, silly, insecure, but that was all she managed to say. Her eyes spoke a different language though. He had called her Catherine, and she couldn´t remember if he had ever used her full name before. Something in his voice told her that it meant something.
And finally he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close, holding her tightly against him. It was somehow awkward but she felt his heart beating hard against her chest and she felt the slight tremble in his fingers that pushed her against him. Inhaling his scent she closed her eyes, trying to burn this very moment into her memory. The way he felt, he smelled and the way he held her. Tears threatened to spill and her heart broke when Steve turned his head slightly and pressed his lips to her temple. And then she heard those words, silent whispers that she needed to hear so desperately.
'This is not the end, Cath... I´ll be there... I´m not gonna let it end this way...'
'I love you, Cath!'
'I love you, Steve.' she whispered and she felt his arms tighten around her even more.
Catherine woke up and when she smelled his warm skin, a smile spread across her face. She couldn´t resist and snuggled closer to him, feeling his arms tighten around her even in his sleep. She felt wonderful, relaxed and happy. It was hard to believe that it took them 7 months after saying goodbye that day, to get here. But they were here and she didn´t want to think about the past months anymore.
Right now it was way more important to feel him and to just stay close to him.
"Good Morning, Sunshine." his dark, low voice whispered and she pressed her lips to his chest.
"Morning, love." His finger lifted her chin and his lips sealed hers in a sweet kiss that made her lean in for more.
It was so good to be back in his arms and if felt so right to forget about the rest of the world for those days they had. It seemed like their goodbye had changed something. Catherine could tell it by the way he called her at least once a week, only to hear her voice. By the way he´d whisper 'Love you' at the end of each conversation. Or simply by the way they could sit in silence, listening to the other one breathing on the end of the line. It felt like Steve truly made a decision, a conscious decision to give them a try.
"So, you wanna get up and shower and have breakfast? Or...?" Steve murmured while his lips trailed from her jaw to her neck, teasing the sensitive skin there.
"Or...?" Cath teased and arched against him, pushing him to his back and straddling him. She loved that cocky grin on his lips, the shadow of a beard on his face and the heated gaze that melted her.
"Or... we could stay in bed for a few more hours and later have lunch instead." he whispered, his eyes travelling down her naked body that was right there, in front of his eyes and lips.
"I don´t even have to ask what you prefer." Cath laughed and trailed her hands over his chest and his chiseled abs.
"It´s not like we haven´t skipped a meal before." Steve laughed while his body shivered under her fingertips.
"Oh, I know, Commander. But usually you feed be before."
"Insatiable woman."
"And you love it."
Steve got serious and his hands framed her face while his eyes locked with hers.
"I love you, Cath." he whispered before pulling her down for a kiss.
Steve felt her lips on his and a warmth spread through his whole body that left him feel goofy. He couldn´t resist to roll around until he was towering over her, smiling brightly when Catherine laughed, surprised by the sudden movement.
"That is not fair!" she giggled and he loved that sound. So carefree, so full of life. He loved being able to goof around with her. That was what attracted him to her at the most, her ability to get him, to see him and to not let him hide anything from her. She has been with him through futile missions and to the painful aftermaths, when nightmares woke him up and he was nearly choking on his own tears. She was there when his father was killed. And she was right there with him when his life seemed to crash into oblivion after the events at Jameson´s mansion. She might not have been there in person – something she was rightfully mad about, in fact she had been mad enough to slap him across the face when she found out, only to kiss him afterwards – but she was in his thoughts and in his mind all the time.
"You´re giving up?" he asked, daring her to protest. Catherine opened her mouth to reply and Steve used the advantage of being on top to slip his fingers to her rips and tickle her. Squealing like a little girl, writhing to get free and finally begging him to stop, Catherine gasped for air while she tried so hard not to laugh.
"Yes... yes... I surrender!" she gasped, trying to keep him from tickling her. Steve slowly stopped and looked down at her flushed face, her dark hair spread on the pillow and her eyes sparkling. She was beautiful.
"Ha..." Steve laughed and leaned down to kiss her... only to find himself on his back, with her straddling him again while she held his hands above his head. He looked at her surprised by the sudden movement but allowed her to be in control. He knew he could easily take over but for once he enjoyed surrendering to her.
"You should know better than to believe me surrendering to you right away..." Catherine whispered while her lips travelled over his chest, gently teasing his chiseled abs before slowly sliding deeper.
"Cath..." Steve´s breath left his lungs in a deep growl while he fought hard to keep his body from arching against her. This was not what he intented. This was not how he had wanted things to go. Without so much as a blink, his hands grabbed her arms and pulled her up. She moaned in protest but Steve silenced her with a sweet, gentle kiss, while he rolled them over again.
Their kiss was slow and tender, teasingly soft enough to make her heart skip a beat and her arms wrap around his neck. She felt his breath on her cheek, his hands in her hair and his body warming her. This was heaven. It was absolutely perfect and she wanted this moment to never end.
She felt his hand slide to her thigh, pulling it higher onto his waist while his fingertips caressed her soft skin teasingly. Catherine moaned softly.
It took Steve a while to lift his head and focus his eyes on the woman beneath him. His heart was beating fast and hard and his mind was foggy. Her dark eyes looked up at him and she smiled gently, combing her slender fingers through his hair.
"I missed you." he finally said softly, his nose rubbing against hers. It was surprisingly easy to admit those feelings to her. Maybe the day she had come to HQ and slapped him and told him that she loved him, maybe that day had changed something. It surely had made him realize something very important. That he was tired of not allowing those emotions emerge. He was tired of keeping it casual and he was tired of being afraid to love. He knew that he could trust her, hell, he trusted her with his life already.
"I missed you too. It´s been so long..." Cath replied and he saw a hint of sadness in her eyes.
"Yeah... too long..." Steve placed a finger onto her lips to stop her from saying whatever it was she wanted to say. "I know, Cath. And I understand. Still it´s not easy to let you go every single time. Not now."
Cath kissed his finger that still sealed her lips. He was right, it wasn´t easy. She knew how he felt, she´s been there many times before when he was called on a mission as a SEAL. They had never said goodbye, but always "See you soon". Even back then, with all those emotions and feelings unspoken, they weren´t willing to end it.
Now she was the one leaving him, going on a mission or being transferred overseas. She was the one to pack her bags and leave him behind, not knowing when they´ll see again. This was her job and she loved her job, but lately things had changed. She wasn´t sure if it was a normal development after being in the Navy for so many years, travelling the globe and seeing so many different places. Maybe she was just tired of having no home, no base to return to. That has changed with Steve. He was her home, her base, her comfort zone she could return to.
She couldn´t find the words to tell him that she felt the same way, that she knew and that she understood, so she simply pulled him down again and kissed him. And Steve happily replied, allowing the sad moment to pass. This was their vacation and he planned on making the most of it.
Steve lips slowly travelled from her lips to her jar and to her neck, sucking the soft skin above her furiously beating pulse. She moaned and shivered under his touch. This guy definitely knew all her soft spots and he used them efficiently to leave her with nothing more to do then surrender to him completely. And Catherine didn´t mind at all. Steve was the only man she ever surrendered to.
His hand moved from her thigh to her side, caressing the soft skin there with featherlight touches that made her giggle.
"Stop it!" she said but moaned, when his hand cupped her right breast and his thumb began to gently brush over the taut peak, making it even harder. He listened to her breath quicken, felt her arch against his touch and heard the sharp intake of breath when he pinched it lightly between thumb and forefinger.
"So sensitive..." he murmured while his lips locked onto her collar bone and his tongue teased her soft skin.
And again Catherine shivered against him, arching closer to his sinful mouth that did incredible things to her. His lips closed around her hard nipple, gently flicking his tongue over it and Catherine could barely hide the gasp that his caress caused. Her body was on fire and his tender love making, his teasing and his giving left her breathless, only wanting more.
Steve moaned when he felt her desire pressed again his own, when her body reacted to him so willingly and she surrendered to his touches. He had never felt close to someone like he did right then and there. Still it wasn´t close enough and he lifted his head, locked eyes with her. He saw her biting her lip when she realized what he was about to do, her eyes clouding over with desire when he shifted slightly between her thighs.
"You´re mine." she purred and wrapped her legs around his waist, pulling him closer until he slid inside her ever so slowly. He growled deep in his throat when her heat engulfed him, inch by delicious inch, until their body became one.
"Really?" he mocked when he was sure he could trust his voice again, still it was hoarse and thick.
"Yep. Mine." Catherine pulled him down and sucked his bottom lip between her teeth, gently biting it only to soothe the pain with her tongue. Steve´s body jerked, grinding deeper inside her.
"Damn woman..." he cursed but his lips smiled and his eyes were dark blue and full of desire.
Her laugh was a little breathless and Steve loved it. They started to move in total sync, him giving, her taking. Her body wrapped around him, holding onto him, giving in to him. And Steve felt his control slip, fast. Their movements were lazy and gentle, still her reaction to him melted his resistance. This wasn´t for ecstasy, this was for giving and taking. And he gave his heart to her when he leaned down and hid his face in her neck, his breathing tickling her skin.
Catherine wrapped her arms around his broad shoulders, pressed him against her heart and moved against his thrusting hips that seemed to catapult her right into oblivion. His moans and ragged breath in her ear turned her on and she wished she could see his face. She felt the muscles in his back move with each thrust, felt his skin heat up and all she wanted was to watch his face when he came undone in her arms.
"Steve... look at me." she whispered and when he lifted his head, her right hand cupped his face, their eyes locked.
"I love you." he whispered and Catherine felt her heart flow over with love and tenderness for his man in her arms. His face was showing his desire, his hunger, his eyes a perfect window inside, showing so much love and caring. His lips swollen from their kisses.
"I love you." he whispered again, his hand holding onto her thigh again while his strokes got longer, deeper without loosing the gentleness that left her wanting more.
The fingers of her left hand travelled over his back, over the taut muscles, caressing his skin, touching the rippled tissue of a scar only to trace it ever so softly that it was his turn to gasp into her touch this time.
He should have known that Catherine might surrender to him, but she´d show him just how much he gave in to her as well. She´d show him with ever so gentle touches and kisses how much he reacted to her. And she´d give just as much as she´d take.
Their eyes locked to each other, their movements grew slightly uncoordinated, a deeper hunger becoming more and more evident and they weren´t able to fight against it anymore. They came undone in each others arms, holding onto each other. Steve whispered her name before moaning deeply when he felt her tighten around him, pushing him over the edge with her.
Sinking back into her arms Steve forced his breath to slow down. Catherine held him to her beating heart and her fingers still caressed his back. She had no idea how long they stayed like this and she didn´t care that they probably had missed breakfast. They could have lunch later. And maybe then she could tell Steve about her transfer request to Pearl.
