And I, yeah, I never prepared for a moment like that
Yeah, suddenly, it all came back, it all came back
'Cause after all these years
I still feel everything when you are near
And it was just a quick "Hello," and you had to go
And you probably will never know
You're still the one I'm after all these years
(Oh yeah)

- All These Years by Camila Cabello

Emma's POV

I'm visiting my adoptive parents this weekend, so I'm back in Storybrooke and I have to say, that not much has changed around here. It is still the small town with the same people, that I left almost 10 years ago.

I actually haven't set foot in this town in that amount of time either since my parents and Ruby always visited me in New York. Storybrooke is the complete opposite of New York, which I've gotten used to consider my home.

The town is so small, that everyone instantly noticed I was back, so here I am at a secret 'Welcome back' party at Granny's, which my best friend Ruby organized for me. I hate party's in my honor – especially surprise party's – but Ruby seemed so excited about it and me telling her I hate this, would only break her heart.

Ruby has been my best friend since we were in kindergarten, so hurting her is the last thing, I'd ever want to do. Also, her girlfriend Mulan is kind of scary and I wouldn't want to get on her bad side since I think she knows how to use a sword.

So here I am, pretending to love the party and interacting with all the people I haven't seen in ages. Everything goes normal, until I hear a voice, I haven't expected to hear today. I was aware of the fact, that he still lived in this town, but I never thought, he'd show up at the party.

And apparently, he isn't here for the party though since he's standing at the counter, ordering two coffees and takeout food – enough takeout food for two people, which feels like someone's stabbing me in the chest.

Sure, I never expected him to stay single forever, but it still hurts to know he's moved on from me, moved on from us. At least he seems happy – happy with whoever she is.

And that's the moment the jealousy sets in and I start hating this woman even though I don't even know her or I do, but don't know she's with Killian.

Not many people move to Storybrooke, so it's likely that I do know her. She might be an old friend of mine, which hurts even more than thinking of her as a total stranger. I just hope, she's new here since with anyone else, it would feel like a betrayal.

Everyone in Storybrooke knew about Killian and I. We were high school sweethearts and totally and completely in love with each other – hell I still love him, if I'm being one hundred percent honest. But when things were getting serious by the end of school, I ran away. He proposed to me and I got scared due to my trust issues caused by my tragic childhood, so I went to college and didn't tell him where I went.

Honestly, I'm surprised, that neither Ruby nor my parents ever told him about my location. I did ask them not to tell him, but deep down I always hoped they would since all I wanted was Killian and that never changed. I was just too stubborn to comeback or text him. I needed him to make the first step like many times during our relationship.

I was too scared to make the first step since he could possibly hate me for leaving him. It's my fault our relationship ended after all.

There hasn't been a day since I last saw him, that I don't regret leaving him though. I miss him and I wish I would have known that day how much leaving him would affect me. But I was so scared, that I wasn't thinking clearly.

Ruby: "Emma?"

I get dragged away from my thoughts by Ruby's worried voice and it's just in that moment, that I realize I'm crying slowly. I wipe the tears away and take a deep breath before turning to Ruby.

Emma: "What is it?"

Ruby: "Nothing. You spaced out and I got worried."

Emma: "Sorry. I just…I didn't think, he'd be here."

Ruby: "I promise, that I didn't invite him, Emma. I wouldn't do that to you."

Oh, so Ruby still believes, that it's his fault I left. I never told her about what happened because I was scared and thought, that if she knew, she'd never let me go, so I rather let her believe he hurt me, which is quite cruel of me, but the only way I could think of back then.

Emma: "It's okay. I don't mind."

Ruby: "You sure? Because I can kick him out."

Emma: "Yeah, I'm sure."

Ruby smiled at me one last time before going back to Mulan and kissing her.

I turn around in Killian's direction again and his eyes meet mine. We are both tense, but still approach each other.

Killian: "Hi."

Emma: "Hi."

I take in his appearance and realize just how much his looks have changed. He's even hotter than I remembered and that causes my knees to feel very weak, so I have to grab the counter in order to keep standing and not make a complete fool out of myself by crashing to the floor.

Killian's hair is a little longer now than it was ten years ago and he also grew a short beard, which is something I usually don't like in men, but he can work anything, I think.

Also in the last ten years Killian seems to have worked out quite a bit since his arms seem a little stronger. It's probably from all the sailing he does with his ship. He already did that a lot back when we were dating. He'd take me out into the middle of the sea and there we'd watch the ocean, hear its waves crashing against the ship, while we had a picnic.

His eyes are the one thing, that hasn't really changed. They're still this incredible blue color and I still get lost in them every time I look into them.

They do seem less sad though and his smile is a little softer.

I remember him being very sad constantly, when we were together since he lost his brother a short time after we met and they moved to Storybrooke. His brother was the only family he ever had, that he can remember, so losing him totally teared him apart. But I guess all wounds can heal, if given the proper time to heal. Sure, they never completely go away, but the pain gets a little easier to deal with and allows you to move on.

Granny: "Killian, your order's finished."

He smiles at me and takes his bag of food and the coffees before leaving the diner and me far behind to go back home to her.

And once again I wonder what she's like. I wonder if she kisses him like I kissed him. I wonder if she loves him like I love him.

And I realize while I look out of the window and see as Killian's figure fades from view, that we left each other once again without a goodbye, without an explanation. This time he did the leaving, but everything else is the same. I still didn't tell him why I left and I didn't tell him that I love him still after all these years.