Yes, I know it's May, not October—a long way from Halloween. But this is another piece I need to get off my computer. I tried just making it a costume party (sans Halloween), but it didn't really work. It started as another chapter of my story Foothold, which I've added to for two or three Octobers in a row. But Teal'c was the main character in those chapters, and this one veered off into S/J shippy-ness. So I'm posting it as a oneshot.
And, yes I also know—Sam's costume is kind of inappropriate for a young teen dance. But that's kind of where the shippy-ness comes in. And after all, it's just a story.
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Yet another Halloween...
Jack was in sooo much trouble!
Leaning against the wall of the gymnasium he wondered why on earth he'd let Cassie talk him into chaperoning for her school's Halloween dance. Trying to hide behind the refreshment table, he watched Carter dancing with one of the other chaperones. Carter, dressed as Catwoman, in black leather pants, high-heeled boots, black silk turtleneck, and long black wig. He couldn't take his eyes away from the sway of her hips, the length of her legs...
~Twelve days earlier~
Jack was hiding in his office. Yep... hiding! There was really no other word for it. He was not—absolutely not!—going to participate in any Halloween shenanigans this year! Not after that debacle when he and Teal'c ended up in jail! His team had laughed over that for weeks afterward! The story had finally faded away, but with the spooky holiday less than two weeks away, it was bound to get resurrected. So the less they saw of him, the better. He'd just hole up in here until after October 31. Nothing short of a foothold situation was going to budge him! He was glued to this chair...
His head came up abruptly as there was a knock on the door. It was a light knock, not a forceful, authoritative knock. So it wouldn't be Hammond or Teal'c. Daniel, maybe... Probably the last person he wanted to see—since Danny had actually seen him in the jail cell. Possibly Carter... but not likely. He'd just ignore it.
The knock came again.
He held his breath and waited.
"Jack?" came a small voice through the door. "Are you in there?"
He clapped his hands to his head. Oh, no! Cassie! He couldn't ignore Cassie. With a resigned sigh, he got to his feet. "I'm coming, Cass." He circled his desk and unlocked the door.
Cassie was standing there with a bright smile on her face. "Hi, Jack!" She stepped inside.
He gave a quick look up and down the corridor, and then shut the door and locked it. "So, hey, Cass," he said turning around. "How ya doin'?"
"Really good!" She hugged him around the waist and he wrapped his arms around her shoulders, noticing that she had grown lately.
"You're getting taller."
"Yeah." She nodded. "I'm almost as tall as Mom now. She says I'll be taller than her in a year or so."
"I don't doubt it," he agreed, ruffling her hair. "Come sit down and let's talk. How's school?"
He perched on the edge of the desk and she sat in his desk chair and spun it around slowly.
"School's fine, Jack. I got an A for my science project last week."
"Oh, yeah? What did you do?"
"I built a miniature stargate and opened a wormhole."
He just stared at her and she rolled her eyes. "I demonstrated how an electromagnet works. Sam advised me. I made it with a battery and wires and stuff."
"Nice," he said. "Congratulations on the A."
"Thanks." She stopped the chair from turning and looked at him seriously. "I came to ask you a favor, Jack."
"Okay. What is it?"
"Well, Halloween is in two weeks, you know."
"Oh, yeah." Just what he'd been afraid of, but he didn't let it show on his face. "Let me guess. You'd like me to take you trick or treating."
"Trick or treating?" Cassie looked at him disdainfully. "I'm thirteen, Jack. Waay too old for trick or treating! That's for little kids!"
"Oh. Of course," he murmured, trying to wrap his thoughts around the idea that thirteen was too old for anything! "Sorry. I don't know what I was thinking. I just lost track of how fast you're growing up."
"It's okay." She gave him a forgiving smile. "Mom says the same thing all the time."
"I'll bet she does. So what's the favor, then?"
"Well, there's a dance at the school. A Halloween dance. And we need chaperones. And I thought of you!"
"Chaperones," Jack repeated. A gym full of thirteen year olds? "And you thought of me."
She nodded with a wide grin. "A couple of the teachers have volunteered, but we need a few more. I already asked Sam and she said she'll do it!"
Jack's eyebrow went up. "Carter said she'd chaperone your dance?"
"Uh-huh."
"When is it?"
"On Halloween, of course! Next Friday."
"You know that something might come up—an emergency or something..."
"That's what Sam said. I know."
"Let me check the schedule. If there's nothing for SG1 already written in, I'll do what I can to keep it free."
"Thank you, Jack!" She jumped out of the chair and hugged him again. "I told Sam you would do it!"
"You already told Carter I'd chaperone?"
"Yep. She said if you'd do it, she would." She stretched way up and kissed his cheek—he had to bend down for it. She headed for the door, then paused with it half open and looked back. "We're asking the chaperones to wear a costume, please."
"Oh. Okay."
"Thanks again, Jack!" She didn't shut the door, and he heard her footsteps skipping down the corridor.
So much for his idea of laying low for the next couple of weeks!
~X~
"Hey, Carter."
She looked up from her computer. He was leaning on the door jamb, arms folded.
"Hi, sir."
"Ya wanna go get some pie and coffee?"
Her eyebrows went up. "Sir?"
"I checked, and the cafeteria's got cherry pie today. I know it's your favorite. My treat."
She smiled. "We don't have to pay for food in the cafeteria, sir."
"Oh. Well, golly gee. I knew that." He smirked, because he'd gotten the smile he was angling for. "Well, how about just taking a break, then?"
"Cherry pie, huh?"
"Yep."
"Okay, sir. Just one sec..." She made a few more keystrokes on her laptop, hit Save, and then closed it down. "There."
Jack looked faintly shocked. "I don't have to twist your arm?"
She smiled again, much to his enjoyment. "No, sir."
The cafeteria was surprisingly empty. Jack carried the tray with two coffees and two pieces of pie over to SG1's usual table, and they made themselves comfortable.
They took bites of the pie and grinned at each other approvingly. For several minutes they concentrated on eating.
Jack took his last bite and set his fork down with a satisfied sigh. "Cassie came to see me a while ago."
"Really? What did she want?"
"I think you already know the answer to that."
"Did you say yes?" she asked, smiling yet again! Gosh, this was turning out to be a good day! Jack thought.
"Of course I said yes. How am I supposed to refuse her? I did say I'd have to check the mission schedule."
"I did that already. We don't have anything on for that day."
"Okay." He nodded. "Then I guess we're chaperoning a Halloween dance. What are you going to dress up as?"
"I don't know. I'll have to look around. What about you?"
He shrugged. "I could go as an Air Force Colonel."
She rolled her eyes and took another bite of pie.
"What?" he asked. "Nobody would guess it was me."
"Of course not."
"Hi, guys." Just then Daniel plopped his tray down on the table, with his own coffee and slice of pie. "How's it going, Jack? Are you ready for Halloween?" he snickered. "Are you and Teal'c going trick or treating again?"
"Indeed I am not going trick or treating, DanielJackson," Teal'c stated in no uncertain terms, as he set his own tray down. It contained two large pieces of pie, and a glass of water. "CassandraFraiser has asked me to chaperone her school Halloween dance."
"You, too?" Sam exclaimed. "She asked me and the Colonel!"
"She also asked me," Daniel said.
Jack chuckled. "Well, it looks like SG1 has a special mission next week! We just have to come up with costumes."
Daniel shot him a worried look.
~X~
They arrived at the school gym together—Scarecrow, Tin Man, Cowardly Lion, and Dorothy.
"You should really be the Tin Man, Jack," Daniel complained for perhaps the tenth time, his voice echoing oddly in his tin-can mask. His neck was getting a crick from the position he had to hold his head to keep the mask on straight.
"Why is that, Daniel? Do you think I don't have a heart?"
"What are you complaining about, Daniel?" Sam griped. "Look at me—I'm wearing a pinafore and knee sox!"
"And I am proclaiming myself a coward with this costume! I am a Jaffa—I am not a coward!" Teal'c whined.
"It's just dress-up, guys. For fun," Jack hissed through gritted teeth...
...Daniel woke with a start from his nightmare. "Nooo," he moaned out loud. "I can't let him talk us into that!" he muttered as he fell back to sleep.
Rewind...
They arrived at the school gym together—Wonder Woman, Superman, Clark Kent, and the Hulk.
"Why can't I be a superhero?" Daniel whined, adjusting his glasses.
"You're my alter ego, Danny. How much more super could you possibly want? Besides, you've go the specs."
"I am green, O'Neill!" Teal'c declared. "I despise the color green!"
"Wonder Woman indeed!" Sam spat. "This isn't a costume! It's underwear! This is the last time I let you pick out my clothes, Jack O'Neill!"
"Looks good from where I stand," Jack said under his breath—waay under his breath...
...Daniel sat straight up in bed. "Oh my god! We have to keep Jack from choosing our costumes!" He reached for his phone and started to dial Sam's number, when he noticed that his alarm clock said 3:05 a.m. He put down the phone. "I guess this isn't the best time to call. I'll talk to her in the morning." He lay down again, and within a few minutes found himself drifting off to sleep once more.
Re-rewind...
They arrived at the school gym together—Chewbacca, Han Solo, Luke Skywalker, and Princess Leia.
"No," Daniel screamed. "I am not going to be a sixteen year old kid with a superiority complex!"
"At least you are able see where you are walking, DanielJackson!" Teal'c snapped, his voice muffled by his furry headpiece. "I have eyeholes the size of peas!"
"That's the third time I've tripped over this ridiculous long dress!" Sam screeched, jerking away from Jack's helping hand.
"Well, if you hadn't worn your combat boots..." Jack gulped down the rest of his comment, as Sam pulled a zat from her bosom...
...Daniel fell out of his bed. He sat on the floor, looking around dazedly for several moments. "Coffee," he grunted at last. He hauled himself to his feet and heading for the kitchen, determined not to fall asleep again!
~X~
"Hey, kids," Jack said as he joined his team for breakfast in the cafeteria. "Glad you're all here. We should talk about our costumes for Cassie's dance."
Daniel swallowed his scrambled eggs, almost choking. "Jack, I am not going to be Clark Kent! Or Tin Man, or Luke Skywalker...!"
Jack's mouth hung open for a moment. "Daniel...?"
Daniel charged on. "And Teal'c's not a coward, and Sam refuses to be Dorothy or Wonder Woman..."
"Daniel!"
"I'm just telling you!"
"Okaaay." Jack glanced around the table. "Do you two know what he's talking about?"
"I do not, O'Neill," Teal'c stated.
Sam shook her head.
"I'm talking about costumes for Cassie's dance! We're not going to be characters from the Wizard of Oz!"
"I never said we should," Jack pointed out.
"Or superheroes, or Star Wars characters! Or any other silly thing that you choose!"
Jack put his hands up in a surrender gesture. "What is going on here, Danny? What did I do?"
"Indeed, DanielJackson, you seem extremely overwrought," Teal'c tried a calming voice.
Daniel looked around at his friends, and started to blush. "Sorry. I had... a nightmare, last night. Actually three nightmares. About Halloween...costumes..." He cringed away from their puzzled looks.
Jack, Sam and Teal'c exchanged glances. "It's okay, Daniel," Sam said. "We understand."
There was a rather protracted silence while Jack spread peanut butter on his English muffin, Sam patted Daniel's arm reassuringly, Daniel stared down at his plate and Teal'c continued to eat stoically.
Finally Daniel pulled himself together enough to ask, "Were you going to suggest something, Jack? About costumes..."
Jack shook his head. "No. I was just gonna ask if any of you has thought about what you'll wear."
"Oh," Daniel said quietly.
~X~
SG-1 did not arrive at the dance together.
It was 7:10 when Jack parked his truck in the lot. The dance started at 7:30, and the chaperones had been asked to come a bit early. There was music coming from the gym. He noticed Daniel's Honda and Sam's Indian already there as he walked toward the entrance.
The decorating committee had outdone themselves. The gym was a huge, spooky cave, with bats, spiders, ghosts, witches and every other imaginable Halloween creature suspended from the ceiling. Somehow the wires had been rigged in such a way that many of the creepy critters swooped back and forth in constant motion, coming only a foot or two above Jack's head at their low point. There can't be any black crepe paper left in all of Colorado, Jack thought, as he eyed the cave's walls and ceiling. Lighted jack-o-lanterns sat on tables and floor all around the perimeter of the gym. The band, on a raised platform on one side, were dressed in black and white costumes—grinning skulls and banshees that would have done KISS proud. They were tuning up, and every so often an eerie shrieking riff would wail from the guitarist's fingers.
The refreshment tables were opposite the bandstand, and a dozen or so people were gathered nearby. Jack picked out Teal'c by his size, and chuckled at the intimidating picture he made in the Jack Sparrow pirate suit. He looked around for Daniel or Carter, but didn't spot them right away.
An attractive young woman in a pink floaty dress, with a crown and a wand, approached him with a smile.
"Glinda?" he guessed, grinning.
Her smile widened. "Right! Welcome, Lone Ranger." She looked him over. "Very nice costume. Thank you for coming. I'm Lynn Sawyer. I teach science."
"I'm Jack O'Neill. A friend of Cassandra Fraiser—she talked me into this."
She looked impressed. "Cassie did a fabulous job. When we asked the kids to try and find chaperones, we never expected anyone to come up with four! Come and have some refreshments, and meet the other chaperones."
Jack was introduced to Dracula, the Red Queen, Popeye, and Fred Flintstone, among others. Teal'c came over to greet him, and he finally located Daniel, in brown leather jacket and fedora, a whip attached to his waist.
Jack laughed. "I thought you said Indiana Jones was a fake."
"Yeah, the archeology is pretty lame," Daniel agreed; but then he admitted, "I like the costume."
"Looks good on you," Jack said. "Where's Carter? I haven't seen her."
"She's here."
"I'm right here, sir," said a voice behind him. Jack turned around and his eyes popped.
She was dressed in her black leathers, high boots, tight pants, and a black silk turtleneck, with a long black wig and a Catwoman mask.
Jack pursed his lips in a silent whistle. "I wondered what kind of costume you could've worn coming on the bike," he said. "You look great, Carter."
She smiled. "Thanks, sir."
He pulled a pained face. "Could you drop the 'sir' for the night, please."
"Only if you call me Kitty... Ranger," she purred.
He nearly choked on his tongue.
Soon after that the kids began drifting in, in twos and threes. Cassie arrived, looking extremely cute as an Indian princess. They were surprised to see Janet with her.
"Yes," Fraiser admitted. "She talked me into it, too."
"Too bad you didn't have time to find a costume," Jack teased, taking in Janet's white coat and the stethoscope around her neck.
She laughed, pulled a white eye-mask from her pocket, and put it on.
"That works," Sam said.
The music had started up, and almost immediately one of the chaperones dressed in a silver zoot suit came over and asked Sam to dance. Daniel held out a hand to Janet, and they moved out on the floor. Jack started to move over to talk to Teal'c, but Glinda cut him off, and invited the huge pirate to dance.
Jack stepped back toward the wall and watched the people. More and more kids were coming in, and he lost sight of Daniel and Janet. The shiny suit Sam's partner was wearing made them easier to spot. And of course Teal'c stood head and shoulders above everyone else.
Jack took off his white hat and set it on a nearby chair. He leaned casually against the wall and watched Carter. God she looked good! The tight pants and shirt showed off every curve!
The only problem was the guy in the silver suit that she was dancing with. He wanted so badly to go out there and cut in!
Deliberately he dragged his eyes away from them, and watched the kids. He'd look for Cassie—that's what! He made himself search the crowded dance floor until he found her. And then he had to smile. The cute little Indian princess was line dancing with half a dozen other girls.
As he was watching Cassie and her group, Carter and her partner danced into his line of sight. His mouth fell open as he watched her move, her black leather clad hips swaying.
The music changed, became faster; Daniel, Janet and Teal'c left the dance floor. Carter and Zoot Suit kept dancing. The moves became even more enticing, and Jack was mesmerized.
Daniel paused beside Jack, took in his friend's expression and followed the direction of his gaze.
"Jack, pick your jaw up off the floor," Daniel said quietly.
When Jack didn't respond, Daniel tapped Janet's shoulder and tipped his head in Jack's direction. They both laughed. At the sound, Jack came to himself, and covered his face with his hands. "Oh, crap," he muttered. "I am in sooo much trouble."
"Yeah, I think you are," Daniel agreed with a grin.
For the next hour Jack watched Sam dance with several different partners, noticing that the Zoot Suit kept circling back and claiming her every second or third song.
Finally he got up the nerve to ask her to dance himself...
They move smoothly out onto the floor. Luckily this song is a bit slower than the last few. The vocalist is crooning into the microphone.
There was a time when I would have believed them
If they told me you could not come true
Just love's illusion
But then you found me and everything changed
And I believe in something again
Tell the world that we finally got it all right
I choose you
I will become yours and you will become mine
I choose you
I choose you
He's gazing down into her face way too intently, and he knows it. But being masked and costumed is like being in a bubble of anonymity. They are not themselves. Her black cat-eyed domino doesn't hide the blue of her eyes at all, of course. The curly black wig doesn't detract from her beauty. His hand is on her waist, and hers on his shoulder, as they automatically match their steps to the music they are both too captivated to hear. All around them, more than two hundred teenagers are dancing and screaming and generally having fun. And they are oblivious. He pulls her a little closer, and lowers his head until his lips are near her ear. "Did I ever tell you how much I love kittens..." he says softly. Her breath hitches, but a moment later she replies, "Did I ever tell you that my heroes have always been cowboys..."
Their eyes lock for a moment, and he pulls her closer. "Kitty," he whispers, and she shivers at the feel of his warm breath on her cheek.
The very high heels she is wearing puts her so near his eye level that it would only take the smallest effort to bring his lips to hers. Every fiber of his being desires that right now, and he can tell by the look in her eyes, by the black pupils that have almost obliterated her irises, by the way she moves infinitesimally closer, that the feeling is mutual.
His hand tightens on her waist, and he doesn't know how he will resist hauling her off the dance floor and out into the dark...
The tap on his shoulder didn't even register. A few seconds later a throat was cleared loudly, and a voice said, "Excuse me."
They tore their eyes away from each other, to find Zoot Suit standing there, a hand extended toward Sam. "I'm cutting in."
Just then the music ended, and Sam shook herself back to reality. "Sorry," she said to the Suit. "I'm going to sit out for a while. Thanks anyway."
"Well we could take a walk... outside," he suggested.
Sam felt Jack's arm around her waist tighten. "No thank you," she said hastily. "My friend and I are going to get some refreshments," she added pointedly.
Instead of taking the hint, he stepped closer, insinuated an arm between her and Jack, fingers brushing her breast, and whispered in her ear. "Don't waste your time on this old guy, sugar. I've got what you want."
The words carried quite well enough for Jack to hear, but before he could react, Sam's hand clamped down on the offending wrist, and forced it away. "This 'old guy' happens to be my commanding officer, and one of my best friends!" she hissed. "So unless you want a broken arm, you better back off right now!" To illustrate her point, she gave the wrist a nasty twist.
"Easy, Carter," Jack said quietly, and she caught the thread of dark humor in his voice. "This is a kid's party. Don't do anything that'll upset Cassie."
"Yes, sir." She let go of the wrist, and Zoot Suit, who had gone as pale as his costume, hugged the arm close to his body, cradling it with the other, and backed quickly away, then turned, almost running, and disappeared through one of the doors into the school corridor.
Sam glanced around. Teal'c was moving in their direction, and so—surprisingly—was Glinda, but no one else seemed to have noticed anything amiss.
Glinda reached them first. "Is everything all right?" she asked in a low voice. "What happened?"
"The guy got a little too forward," Jack said. "No harm done—not to us, at least."
"Shall I pursue him, O'Neill?" Teal'c asked, having arrived half a step behind Glinda.
"No. I don't think he'll be back. Carter convinced him."
"I'm so sorry," Glinda said. "He's the older brother of one of the students. He volunteered to chaperone."
Glinda looked a bit shaken, and Sam hastened to reassure her. "It was not your fault."
"He could have hurt you!"
"That is unlikely," Teal'c said. "Major Carter is a formidable warrior."
Glinda's gaze flicked from Teal'c to Sam. "Warrior?"
"That's just his way of talking," Sam said quickly. "I'm in the Air Force." She tried to ignore the smirk on Jack's face.
"Well, okay," Glinda said a little uncertainly. "As long as you're sure you're all right."
"We're fine."
Glinda left them after a few more assurances, and Sam, Teal'c and Jack made their way toward the refreshments table. Janet and Daniel joined them a few moments later, and they all took something to drink. After a while, Teal'c asked Sam to dance, and Daniel and Janet also returned to the floor.
Jack retreated to the wall where he'd been standing earlier, and sipped his glass of punch—wishing it had something in it a little stronger than grapefruit juice! He saw Zoot Suit come back into the gym sometime later, but he did not go near the dance floor, and instead headed for the door and vanished into the dark.
Jack sighed. He should really have thanked the jerk—his intervention had prevented Jack from possibly crossing that fragile line...
He removed his hat, and then took off his mask. No more anonymity. Get back to reality, O'Neill, he thought. Carter was Carter—not Kitty!—and he was her CO for the foreseeable future. Someday, he promised himself, things would be different.
-finis-
The song snippet is from "I Choose You" sung by Sara Bareilles.
Not a 'happy ending' I guess. Sorry. I really meant to keep it funny and ridiculous. The best laid plans...