You're Forgiven

by lolhaha123

Clarke leaves camp alone (Post 2X16) only to find herself caught by the Grounders, or more specifically, one Grounder Queen. Bellamy refuses to give up on her and follows. (Mostly Bellarke, maybe a little Clexa. Will alternate between Clarke and Bellamy's POV. Please review and let me know if this actually sounds interesting lol).

1. Chapter 1

I could barely breath. It was just too much.

"If you need forgiveness, I'll give that to you. You're forgiven. Please come inside," Bellamy pleaded quietly. I couldn't even look at him, or I knew I wouldn't be able to say what I had to say.

"Take care of them for me," He flinched slightly as I said it. We both knew what I meant. After this, there was no going back.

"Clarke" he protested.

I interrupted him. "Seeing their faces everyday, is just gonna remind me of what I did to get them here." My chest felt so heavy with guilt, I could barely stand.

"What we did," he said, touching my arm lightly. It sent a jolt of electricity through my body. "You don't have to do this alone."

I could see his eyes saying everything his words couldn't. I knew that leaving would hurt him, I knew that we weren't just friends. Over the past few weeks, he had become everything to me. But I couldn't stay. Seeing me everyday would destroy him.

I turned to look at the camp one last time, to see what I had done. "I bear it," I said, "so they don't have to." I bear it so you don't have to, I thought.

"Where are you gonna go?" Bellamy asked me.

"I don't know." I had no clue. All I knew was that I needed to leave. Now.

Quickly I closed the space between us and kissed his cheek. I felt him lean into me, and for a second it was just the two of us. I hugged him and felt his arms tighten around me. I was so scared I wouldn't be able to let go.

Before I lost my nerve, I whispered, "May we meet again." I pushed him away gently and turned towards the woods. I couldn't look back. I wouldn't be able to handle the pain and hurt I know I would see in his eyes, or the way his shoulders sagged slightly, like he had been defeated.

I felt some of the weight lift from my chest and I knew I had made the right choice. For the 47, for my mom, for Bellamy. For me. I hadn't been able to look any of them in the eye on our walk back from Mount Weather. I had killed them. I had killed them all. Bellamy tried to take responsibility, but I couldn't let him. This would have destroyed him, and Octavia needed him. The Sky People needed him.

I needed him. I pushed this thought from my mind and quickened my pace towards the tree line. I knew there would be Grounders close, but I didn't care. I didn't know where I was going, or what I was going to do. I couldn't stay, but where could I go?

It wasn't until I had entered the forest that I heard an awful wail from far behind me. Tears sprung to my eyes as I hear my mother yell my name, wracked with sobs. And suddenly, I couldn't take it. I started to run as sob after sob escaped me. My tears blinded me and I didn't know where I was going. Soon I collapsed on the soft soil, unable to breath. I lay there, unable to move, as I felt the full weight of what I had done wash over me. I had killed them. I had killed them all. I should have waited just a few more seconds for Jasper, everything would be different. I should have waited.

I lay there, curled up in a ball, as my sobs turned to silent tears streaming down my face. I was tired. I was so, so tired. I let my eyes close and numbness overtake me as I drifted off to sleep.