A/N: I love the song 'Sometime Around Midnight' by The Airborne Toxic Event. So, in honor here is this little story...

I swirl the wine in the glass for the umpteenth hundredth time. The red liquid touching all parts of the glass until it again settles back to the bottom. Somehow my life felt a lot like the red liquid as it spun in circular fashion, a whirlwind of uncertainty. Would it settle back down or spill over the sides?

I knew exactly what caused this chaos to ensue. I knew exactly what made it be just that way. It was her.

I look up to see Olivia walking towards me. She is carrying another glass of wine for me and a beer for her. Quickly, I down the wine in my hand and reach a hand out to take the fresh glass. As I receive the glass, I hear Elliot and John erupt in yelling laughter at Fin and George while playing pool. They greatly underestimated George's ability for the game. I smirk, thinking that I could so easily wipe the floor with the four of them, a fact that I have been saving for exactly the right moment.

"Still wallowing?" Olivia asks.

"Maybe just a little. I know it's been sixth months and I need to let it go and move on. I have for the most part. It's just well you know next weekend would have been the day." I reply with uncertainty dripping from my voice.

I hate how easy my friend can read me. It's not fair. I would rather no one know how much I miss her. I would rather no one know that I am fully aware just how much I screwed up that relationship. I know that I, Alexandra Elizabeth Cabot, am solely responsible in ruining my relationship. I am responsible for destroying the possibility of a happy future.

Ugh, the thought makes me sick. I can literally feel the bile roll up in my throat. I quickly chase it down with half the glass of wine I was just handed; anything to dull the pain away, anything to help me stop thinking about her. Maybe tonight, I will be able to climb into bed to sleep and actually sleep.

Sleep has been impossible since she left. It's hard to sleep when you want the person you love so much, but they aren't there with you. I miss the feeling of her breath against my skin, I miss the beat of her heart, her soft skin. I find it impossible to sleep without telling her goodnight, without kissing her softly and wishing her sweet dreams. It's my fault. I need to get over it.

I finish the glass and notice Olivia eyeing Brian Cassidy again. Touching her arm, I say, "Go on over Liv. I am not going to break. Go have fun." She gives me an unsure look. I place a hand over my heart and feign shock. "Olivia, do you not trust me?"

"I think you are vulnerable Alex. What kind of friend would I be if I left you to wander drunkenly by yourself through a bar?" she states and asks as she stands.

"A good one," I reply seeing a stunning beauty across the bar. "Maybe a one night stand is exactly what I need to move on…" I whisper loud enough for her to hear as I head towards my potential prey.

I can hear my friend yell be careful behind me. I don't stop to heed the warning. My mind is on one thing and one thing only. Sex. It's been too long and I need to rid her of my mind. This is the perfect way tonight.

I take a seat next to the brunette. I eye her up as best as I can without being noticed. I am trying to feel her out. I don't like to insult a woman before making a move. I like to remain dignified.

The bartender heads my way. I quickly place an order for another glass of wine. I am suddenly nervous. Maybe I should start with simple small talk. It is always the best approach when nervous. My nerves are taking over and I am not sure what to say. I decide to say nothing and drink instead. It's to soon.

I hear the band begin to play again as I drink my wine in gulps, trying to drown the images of my ex from my head. As I drink, my mind begins to wander to the song I am hearing the band play. The lyrics having an ability to make me smile genuinely…

Drink up with me now, forget all about
The pressure of days, do what I say
And I'll make you okay, drive them away
The image is stuck in your head.

The melancholy sound of the music has a magical effect on me, or maybe it's the wine. As I look up, I see her. The song the band is playing suddenly seems like a soundtrack to her smile as she locks eyes with mine…

Drink up one more time and I'll make you mine
Keep you apart, deep in my heart
Separate from the rest but I like you the best
Keep the things you forgot.

I can't believe she is here standing across the bar from me. She is wearing her favorite white dress and standing there amongst friends, laughing her beautiful laugh, holding her tonic like a cross. How long has she been here, and how have I not noticed until now?

She is stunning and my mind runs back to memories of holding her close, hearing her laugh for me. I feel like the whole room is beginning to spin. My earth has been knocked off axis and now I am in a whirlwind of emotions. I notice her lock eyes with mine. Those beautiful green eyes instantly captivate me. I can't think clearly and I can't tell if it's the wine or me.

I watch as she crosses the bar to me. She's headed in my direction. I can feel my heart pounding in my chest. I am not sure what to say to her, hell I am not sure what to do at all. Suddenly, I am having trouble breathing as she approaches me. I haven't talked to her since she moved out. Her red hair seems to sparkle in the lights of the bar. I want to pull her into my arms and kiss her.

"Casey," I say just loud enough for her to hear me. My body longs to say her name over and over again. I haven't spoken it since she left and now I don't want to stop saying it.

"Alex, how have you been?" Casey asks me. She is clearly trying to be nice and not make this chance run in to awkward.

The large amounts of alcohol I have consumed aren't helping this to be less awkward though. The smell of her perfume is causing me to imagine her in my arms as I kiss my way down her body. Images of her arching into my kisses and tangling her hands in my hair as I please her... I am barely able to stutter out a, "Good Casey, and you?"

"I've been good as well. Well, I should be getting back, it was nice seeing you Alex." She says as she returns to her group. As she walks away, I feel cold and empty.

I feel stripped of any hope I may have had of us correcting this terrible tragedy called a break up. I know I screwed up. I should have fought harder for her. Casey should be mine. We should be getting married next week.

Watching her watch me, I see Casey lock arms with another woman and exit the bar. I can literally feel my skin paling at the sight. Feeling a hand placed on my shoulder, I turn to face Fin and Elliot. Fin speaks first in a concerned tone, "Hey Alex, you alright? You look like you've seen a ghost or somethin'."

Elliot follows, "Yeah, everything okay?"

I can't speak, it's like Casey took my voice with her when she left. All I can think about is her and that I have to see her again. I have to speak with her. I have to tell her that I am still in love with her and that I will fight till my dying breath for her.

Grabbing my clutch I stand and say, "I am good. I am heading home though. See you tomorrow."

They look at me like I've grown a second head as I make my way out of the bar. My feet aren't that steady beneath me, but I have to find her. I have to see her again. I have to fight for her starting tonight. I should have fought harder the last time we were together, but my stupid ego got in the way.

As I stumble down the street, I see people stare at me. I don't care, yes New York City, I, Alex Cabot am drunk and stumbling down the street after my ex-fiancé. I don't care have me arrested if need be.

I hear her laugh and spot her getting into a cab across the street. Not thinking twice I try to run in that direction, but my drunken state causes me to fall. I curse at my shoes and kick them off as I stand and walk out into the street and directly in front of the moving vehicle. The cabbie slams on his breaks to avoid running me over.

I am slightly wide eyed at my own crazy decision as I lock eyes with a terrified cab driver, passenger, and Casey inside. She steps out of the car clearly enraged at me. "Alexandra Cabot, what the hell do you think you are doing?" She yells.

As steadily as I can I take a deep breath and say, "Casey, we need to talk. I can't live without you."