Rest in Peace Trapper
The Characters of MASH are the property of FOX or Hallmark or somebody, you know
the drill.
Hawkeye just left Margaret's tent. They had just returned from the 8063rd and a
trip that changed their opinions of each other if only for a little while. Walking back to the
Swamp, Hawk thought to himself.
"If she wasn't married, I'd get on my knees tonight and propose."
It was getting late, and Hawkeye was exhausted, so for once he called it a night
before midnight. Around midnight Hawkeye was awakened by a chill. He opened his eyes
and Trapper, his ex Swampmate was standing at the foot of his cot. He had a sad look on
his face. He mouthed the word goodbye and vanished. Hawkeye thought nothing of it, but
a bad dream. Around three am he was awakened by an incoming jeep. They had wounded.
The MASHers worked twelve hours non stop until they ran out of wounded.
Hawkeye and BJ left the OR and headed to the mess tent for some cold coffee and some
stale bread. They sat down in the tent as BJ told Hawkeye about the current goings on in
Mill Valley. Radar almost fell through the mess tent doors.
"Radar you're supposed to fall out the Mess Tent doors not in,"
Hawkeye looked at Radar. Radar's face was as white as a ghost. The last time it
was that white was when he announced Henry died. Hawkeye knew something was
wrong. Radar handed Hawkeye the note in his hand. Hawkeye read it and busted out the
door without a word. BJ took the letter and read it as Radar broke down in tears. The
note said:
"Trapper John Xavier McIntyre was hit by a car two days ago. He passed away
last night."
BJ ran after Hawkeye who went straight to the Swamp. He had already swallowed
his second drink when he got to him.
"Hawk? Are you okay?"
"Yeah I'm fine. Why?"
"Well the note-"
"I know what the note said, but it's not true. It can't be. He's probably just playing
a joke on me that's all."
Then Hawkeye remembered the dream he had last night. It was real! Trapper was saying
goodbye to him.
"Oh God no!"
Hawkeye threw his martini glass against the stove. As it shattered so did his
emotions. He couldn't believe it Trapper was gone. He never got to say goodbye.
Margaret came in at this point.
"Pierce? Are you okay?"
Hawkeye was bawling like a baby.
"I never, I never got to say goodbye. He never said it either. He didn't even leave
me a damn letter!"
"That's not true."
Margaret spoke without thinking. She would have to tell the secret she kept for
almost a year.
"What? What do you mean?"
"He left a letter, but-"
"But what where is it?"
"Frank got hold of it."
"That son of a bitch."
Hawkeye leapt over to what used to be Major Burn's section, but now belonged to
Major Winchester. He tore into everything thinking he would find the letter. Charles
walked in and wasn't to pleased at what he saw.
"Pierce! What the Hell are you doing to my things."
"He's looking for Trapper's letter?"
"Who?"
"Trapper McIntyre. He was one of the guys who was here before we were. He just
found out he died yesterday. The other guy, the one you replaced, had Trapper's letter, or
that's what Margaret says."
Hawkeye wasn't listening to the conversation between BJ and Charles. He needed
to find Trap's letter. Margaret's voice brought him back to reality.
"Pierce it's not there."
"Then where is it? What did that piece of garbage do with it."
"I've got it!"
"What? Why?"
"Frank read it and tossed it in the stove. I got it out after he left the tent."
"Why didn't you let me have it when I came back, or the year since then?"
"Because. I forgot."
"Where is it? Damn it Margaret I need to see that letter!"
Margaret left the tent. Hawkeye was full of anger. He was angry at Margaret,
Frank, Trapper, and himself. He was about to go after Margaret when she returned with a
singed piece of paper in her hands. He grabbed it and began to read it to himself.
Dear Hawkeye,
I'm sorry we couldn't do this in person, but I guess that's just another casualty of
war. Before we say goodbye, I got to tell you something: Ol' Hotlips is a real firecracker.
Write me when I get home and I'll give you the whole story, wink, wink. I got to go, my
jeep's here. Keep the nurses busy for me. Goodbye and good luck!
See you in the funny papers,
Trapper
BJ and Charles had left the tent. They left Margaret behind with Hawkeye. He
wanted to be mad at her, but he couldn't he knew why Frank tossed the letter in the stove,
but why did she retrieve it and keep it from him?
"Why? Why did you keep this from me?"
"When Frank saw this, he went bezerk. It took me a while before he believed me
when I told him nothing happened."
"Did it? Did anything happen?"
"We both got drunk the night before the night before he left. We snuck off to the
supply room and we just kissed. I passed out. I woke up the next morning in my tent H
never mentioned it. I saved it because I was going to let you have it after I marked the
stuff about me and if you asked, I would say Frank did it. Hawkeye please don't be mad at
me."
Hawkeye couldn't be mad at Margaret no matter how hard he tried. He just took
her by her hand and lead her to the still. He reached under his cot and pulled out a bottle
of bathtub gin. He handed her a glass and one for himself.
"This was Trap and mine's first batch we ever made. We said we would save it for
a special occasion."
Hawkeye poured the gin in the two glasses and took his and raised it in the air.
Margaret raised her glass..
"To John Xavier McIntyre. Rest in Peace Trapper."