BOOM!

Another Story! yay! Ha, I need friends...

Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Kogan or Jarlos although that would be pretty freakin' awesome!

Chapter one: Pain.

Day 1

Time seemed to slow down, I guess that's how it always is when you're anxious to know something. This however, killed me.

I wanted to know what was happening to my husband, It's been four hours and the doctors haven't told me anything.

I was beginning to get frustrated, why couldn't they tell me what was happening? I have a right to know!

It hurt.

Being away from him for so long stung, but I couldn't exactly do anything about it.

Carlos sat on his boyfriends lap. It annoyed me. Why were they showing affection towards each other at a time like this? I wanted to hold the man I love and they know that, so why? why must they do this. I glared at them. They didn't see. They didn't care.

Maybe I didn't either.

My heart was breaking every second I was breathing.

So maybe I didn't care if they didn't see.

"Mr. Knight?" The nurse called out.

Her name was Rebecca. She had long brown hair and dark blue eyes, she was beautiful, and maybe if I was straight I'd be interested. But I have a gorgeous husband and I wouldn't trade him for the world.

I stood up.

My feet could barely carry me because I was so tired, but I managed.

James and Carlos stood and begun to follow me.

"No. Sit." I sighed. "I can do it by myself, I'm not going to break." I was lying. I most defiantly was breaking.

Every emotion on my face screamed 'I'm dying but you can't save me, Only Logan can'

If Logan was with me he'd tell me I was over thinking, He'd say something like 'Kendall baby you need to calm down.'

Of course if he was here, I wouldn't be in this position.

"Do you have any news on Logan? Please tell me you do. oh god, its bad isn't it?" I panicked. I didn't know what else to do, I was worried and scared. James and Carlos were listening from a distance, I let them, they had a right to know what was happening to their friend.

"Mr. Knight deep breaths please." She looked at me in the eyes, she looked upset. "It's not good news I can tell you that... Your husband has cancer." She paused. My heart stopped beating, I could feel it. The pain was so real. "five days, maybe more... but five days seems to be confirmed pretty good. I'm so sorry." She put a hand on my shoulder before turning and leaving.

Tears fell.

He's my everything, and He's leaving.

I dropped to my knees. pain. That's all I felt.

How could this be happening? I'm dreaming right? this is just a bad, bad nightmare.. I'll wake up soon. He'll be laying in my arms and everything will be fine.

"Kendall..." James stood behind me. I felt so small, so broken. "It will be okay buddy, You'll get through this.. I Know you're strong enough." I stood up and faced him, anger crossed over me. I clenched my fist and let all my emotions and feelings out.

"You're joking right? You can't possibly think That I can get through this.. Logan Is dying! The man I love, My soul mate, my rock, the only one for me is dying and I can't save him! I feel so worthless because I can't help my baby through this. He always helped me through everything, why can't I save him?! Why is god doing this to me?! what did I do to deserve this! All I did was love him and the world is threatening to take him away from me!" I screamed, tears streamed down my flushed cheeks. "I can't live without him. I'll be lost, and scared."

"I'm so sorry Kendall. If there is anything we can do for you just let us know" James and Carlos wrapped me in their arms for a hug.

All I felt was pain. Why couldn't it be me that was dying? My precious Logie doesn't deserve this, He's only twenty for crying out loud.

I sat down on the chairs in the waiting room, my eyes began to feel heavy.

Maybe I'll get to see him tomorrow.

Maybe my heart was meant to be broken.

Chapter 2 will be up soon, enjoy!

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Thanks :)

~Kaycee