Of all the nights Bellamy had awoken with the knowledge he was finally on Earth, this one was by far the best. It didn't matter that he was freezing, his blanket bunched up next to him, or that his neck was stiff from having no pillow, which was also next to him. The fact was, he could overlook all of these minor discomforts by just looking to the edge of his makeshift bed.
A silhouette was outlined against his tent, barely noticeable in the darkness that was outside. Evidently the fire had been put out a while ago, as it didn't look like there were any embers left burning, although he could be wrong - there was a thin piece of fabric separating him from the rest of the camp.
He watched as the silhouette at the end of his bed raised its arms, tying long hair into a side braid before dropping them again and sighing. Taking this as his queue to announce his newly awakened state, Bellamy coughed once and sat up slowly, testing out his sore muscles.
"Can't sleep?" he murmured, leaning forward to place a hand on her back softly. One side of his mouth turned upwards slightly as he felt her shiver, undoubtedly from the lack of heat his hand gave. She shrugged softly, deciding against speaking this early. "Want me to leave you alone?"
She tensed under him, clearly thinking his request through, and Bellamy's heart tightened. He could understand if she wanted to be alone - this thing between them was new, he was sure they would both need time to wrap their heads around it, even if he had been thinking about it for weeks now - but he was dreading her answer. Last night, when it had happened, they'd both had a bit to drink, so maybe she was regretting it? Maybe she had been more drunk than he had thought, and he had unknowingly taken advantage of her. His blood ran cold at the thought. If she hadn't wanted it then she would never give him a chance to win her heart, and worse he would have violated her. Could he live with himself if that was the case? Certainly if someone did that to Octavia he would banish them - after roughing them up a little (a lot) - so maybe he would have to banish himself. And if Finn came after him and decided he deserved a black eye or two, he would be no less deserving. Bellamy went to drop his hand as these thoughts ran through his head, but her voice stopped him in his tracks.
"No," Clarke mumbled, "just don't speak. I need to think." She turned to face him with a pleading look in her eyes, and Bellamy felt his heart melt. He nodded slowly, trying not to spook her, before scooting forward to sit next to her.
"Can I at least have a hug? I'm freezing." The look she gave him was one of guilt, and it took him a few moments to figure out why as she played with the hem of the shift she was wearing. Glancing down at the shift with shocked eyes, he looked back to face her with what he was sure was surprise written all over his face. Surely if she didn't care she wouldn't have bothered to wear something that would remind her of exactly was had been lying behind her until a minute ago. So maybe it was just him that cared about her, maybe she cared about him too. Maybe all the doubts he was having, she was experiencing also.
Deciding not to say anything was hard. Doing what he was told was not something he was used to, but she had told him to keep quiet, so he guessed he should respect that. He waited for a reply, but when none was forthcoming, took it as a no and turned to reach for the blankets behind them both. A small hand wrapping itself around his wrist stopped him however, and when he looked to Clarke's face he stopped in his tracks.
"A hug would be acceptable." Clarke spoke with all the uncertainty of the world resting in her voice, and Bellamy's brow furrowed. He grabbed the blanket anyway, wrapping it around them both before sliding one arm around her waist and pulling her close. As soon as she was close enough he frowned softly.
"You're shivering. Why didn't you put something thicker on, or take the blanket. It's not like you left any for me anyway," he tried at a joke but fell flat, aware that he sounded too concerned. He wrapped his hands around her arms, amazed at how slight they were, and started rubbing them to return warmth to them.
Glancing at him from the corner of her eye, Clarke shrugged and held on to the edge of the blanket in her small hands. The shivering didn't stop, and it took him a minute or two to decide that maybe it wasn't just from the cold.
"You wanna talk about it, Princess?" He asked softly, stopping his hands from moving and taking her back into a one armed hug. He prayed for an affirmative, although he knew this probably wouldn't be the answer he got. The two of them never spoke about stuff like this, never about feelings, usually all they did was shout at each other about the state of the camp and the teens in it.
Not that he didn't love their arguments, in fact Bellamy looked forward to them to break up the monotony of the day. And Clarke was damn attractive when she got all angry. Not that he would ever admit it to her, but when she narrowed her eyes and he could see fury brewing in them, it would make his heart lurch - and it wasn't ineffective at waking certain parts of his anatomy. It took every fibre of his being not to grab her and kiss her when she took small steps towards him, shaking with anger and poking his chest with one finger, but as far as he knew she wouldn't appreciate this. Which was why he'd been so surprised yesterday when, just as he was starting to raise his voice over something stupid (were they really arguing over who ate the last handful of berries?) she pulled his lips down onto hers and kissed him like they were the last two people on Earth.
She had tried to pull back, but of course he didn't let her get too far, just dragged her to his tent and ravished her. All the anger they had been feeling was turned into other primal emotions, not exactly as loving as he had imagined their first time would be but he wasn't complaining.
Clarke shook her head softly, whispering her reply quietly enough that he had to strain to hear her. "No, it's fine." Her head caught the tiniest piece of light, and he noticed wetness running down her cheeks. Stiffening, Bellamy pulled away from her and clenched his fists in his lap.
"If what happened disgusts you that much, maybe you should leave. Leave the shirt," he spoke with as much coldness as he could muster, pushing down on the hurt he was feeling all over. Throwing the blanket off himself, he stood to leave, trying to put as much of a glare as possible into his eyes as he gazed down at the crying girl. "I'll let you change in privacy. Let you pretend I haven't seen anything. You can go back to hating me all the easier then, princess."
Small hands were clamped around his wrists tightly, but Bellamy barely noticed, so determined was he to leave so she wouldn't see how she affected him. He tried to pull away but only succeeded in pulling Clarke to her feet. Pointedly not looking at her, he gazed to the tent entrance and clenched his jaw. If he stayed it would just make things harder for him, and he didn't think he could take any more. Clarke let out a small sob, and before he could stop himself he swivelled his gaze around to hers and blanched at the view. Her face was a mess of tears, she'd obviously been crying silently a while before he even woke up. She looked utterly broken, looking up at him with such hurt in her features that he couldn't help himself. He took a step towards her and wrapped his arms around her body, holding her tight as she buried her head in his chest and cried.
"I'm so s-sorry," she whimpered, "I shouldn't have thr-thrown myself at you. It was stupid, and... And I know I've changed everything..." She broke off, rubbing at her eyes furiously with one fist as her other hand hung loosely at her side. "I know I'm just another notch on the bedpost for you, I just wish sometimes that you would notice me as someone other than to scream at. I need you, as more than someone to take my anger out on. And I know admitting it will make me weak, give you all the power, but I want you." She buried her head further into his chest, bringing her hands up to hide her face as she sobbed harder. Bellamy couldn't help it, he felt as though his heart was about to jump out of his skin, and a grin engulfed the whole of his face. He tightened his hold on his beautiful co-leader, placing a kiss on the top of her head.
"You're an idiot, Clarke Griffin, if you think I feel any differently than you apparently do." She stiffened and raised her head slightly, not quite enough to look at him though, so he took her chin and forced her head up. "I've wanted to be with you since we got here. The other girls were to make you jealous, nothing more, and when I realised it wasn't working... It stopped." Clarke was looking to him with hope shining in her eyes, her mouth hanging open a tiny bit. Raising one hand, he gently wiped her face to rid it of the tears she'd been crying. "I only ever wanted you Clarke, and honestly I'm surprised you couldn't see that fro-"
Bellamy was cut off by the feel of Clarkes lips on his, and although it took him a second to register what had happened, he wasted no time in showing her how he felt. Pouring every part of his emotions into the kiss, he felt Clarke moan between them and smiled into the kiss. Gently, he pushed her back onto the bed and hovered over her, pulling the covers over them to make sure she didn't get too cold again. He was about to lean down and claim her as his own again when he noticed a mischievous glint in her eyes. Praying this wasn't all a horrible joke, he couldn't help the worry that seeped into his features.
"Just so you know..." she started, starting to tug her shirt - technically, his shirt - up her body, "I know you ate the berries last night..." Grinning, she left the shirt just covering herself and let her fingers roam over his stomach, trailing her fingers lightly over his skin and making him shiver.
"Wha-What?" Bellamy stammered, completely taken back by the comment. Confusion must have shown all over his face as she giggled - she actually giggled! - and placed a kiss on his neck.
"The argument last night, about whether you ate the berries or not. I know you were lying when you said you didn't, because..." she raised her head to breathe the rest of the answer into his ear, "I could taste them on your tongue."
Bellamy growled with desire and lowered his head, sucking on on her neck. He waited until she let out a moan on pleasure before answering her. "I'm sure I can make it up to you Princess."
Their second time was slower and more loving, but just as satisfying, and Bellamy would be lying if he said he didn't love the way she fell asleep with her head on his chest. And he would be lying if he said waking up to sunlight passing through the tent onto her golden hair didn't make him feel like the luckiest guy on Earth, or the Ark. Finally, he would be lying if he said he didn't get a pang of happiness when Clarke didn't skip out to her own tent before everyone woke up, and instead decided that she didn't care who saw them. Maybe things were starting to look up for him, if he had managed to score the perfect girl. All he had to do for it was come down to Earth.