Author's note: HEY LOVES! So I have decided to make this one shot involving Cyborg (Victor Stone) and his adopted son, Parker (my OC). I realized I haven't let them have any time together, so I wanted to do something in their early days. This is different than I Got You or I Promise because Parker isn't adopted until he's older. Please enjoy.
TRIGGERS: Mentions of Abuse, suicide, and depression
Parker spends most of his time away from his friends. He can't deal with the pitiful glances they throw at him. In the two weeks since he had moved in with them, the Logan twins and Sophie Grayson had gone out of their way to include him- invites to play video games, to go skateboarding, to train. He always turns them down with a pained smile. Instead he walks around the tower, thinking. Feeling more like a ghost than a guest, he doesn't do much of anything. This concerns the adult Titans because aside from a quiet good mornings at breakfast, Parker doesn't say much. He goes to school with his friends, comes home, does his homework, and goes off on his own.
"Perhaps one of us should speak to him," Kor'i suggests one afternoon. The kids hadn't gotten home from school yet so they had been training.
"Kor'i, I'm not sure if that's a good idea. He's been through a lot-"
"Garfield, that is why I believe one of us should speak with him." She counters," In less than a moon cycle, he has lost his sister and his parents have tossed him away."
"I'm going to side with Kor'i here," Victor says," I've been in a place similar to where Parker was. After-after my accident, I didn't want to be around anyone. If y'all hadn't shown up when you did, I probably wouldn't be who I am today. Might not even be here."
This comment makes the titans quiet. They'd all suffered, but they could all live semi normal lives. Victor hadn't been able to feel his hands in decades. He'd lost his mother and his future. Raven sets her cup of tea down. Since becoming a mother, Raven has become more compassionate and more open. She knew exactly how each person on the team felt right now due to her empathic powers. Garfield and Dick seem to be on the same side for once. Both want to give Parker his space. Victor and Kor'i (not to anyone's surprise) agree that he needs to work through it. She would have to be the tie breaker.
Before she can say anything, the door opens and six teens fill into the room. Dick rolls his eyes as his daughter Sophie argues loudly with Matt West over the logic of Sherlock Holmes. Lila, Luke, and Jania talk about a test coming up. Lila laughs, her face lighting up the whole room. Parker slinks in behind his friends. His face is thinner than it had been when they first met him. Dark bags protrude under his eyes, even though he seemed to be constantly asleep.
"How was school?" Dick asks, moving over so Sophie can drop her backpack on the kitchen table. She kisses his cheek.
"Good. No one hit me with food today and only three people called me a freak." Sophie's voice is cool and crisp.. Raven can feel Dick's love for his daughter from across the table, a feeling she's known for 13 years. But there's a new presence in the room that throws her off. Victor notices her frowning in Parker's direction. Jania and the twins are spread out on the couch, notes opened, quizzing each other over dates and people. They send such a positive vibe that everyone can feel it. Matt and Sophie have opened their laptops, each making snarky comments at each other. Neither calls the other by their first name. Matt is West and Sophie is Grayson. Most heroes who witnessed this duo arguing had bets placed on when they would start dating. Even with their snarkiness, both Matt and Sophie aren't as malicious as they can be on bad days.
No one has to be an empath to notice the darkness around Parker. He sits up at the bar, quietly working on homework. Raven makes eye contact with Victor and adults slide into their normal after school attitude, with a plan.
"Wow, you all started your homework without an hour of negotiation." Garfield teases, leaning over the couch to kiss Lila.
"Public school isn't like home school," She says, her voice soft and musical. Every word she spoke sounded like she was singing.
"We got shit to do," Luke finishes. His voice is scratchier than his twin's, but there's always a calmness to it. Even when he would be yelling at full volume. Jania hums off key. She and her brother had started coming to the tower after the kids meet the first day of school. Their parents, Wally and Artemis, are beyond thrilled that Matt and Jania have friends who understand their lives.
"Whatever happened to my motto? I might not be smart enough to do everything, but I'm dumb enough to try anything. How do you think I ended up with you two?"
"DAD!" The twins faces turn bright green with embarrassment. Raven smiles at her children and husband. Parker shifts in his seat. Victor swears Parker looks at the twins with their dad with a look of longing.
"Um, I just realized I need to go record, uh, something for a, uh, class," Parker shoves his books into his bag. He prays none of them see the tears in his eyes or hear his voice crack. His friends are so absorbed in their tasks already that he won't have to worry about them. Shuffling out of the room, he tries hard to throw a positive energy at Raven, so he can be left alone. The second he's gone, the five teens stop what they're doing.
"Scale of 1-10, Li?" Sophie asks.
"3," She answers," Yesterday was a 5."
"Damn it," Jania swears," I thought we'd be able to help him more. Matt, has he said anything to you?"
"We're in the same grade, Jani, but we have a lot of different classes," Matt, the oldest by a year, answers," The other guys in my grade are giving him space."
"Why?" Luke asks," I thought Parker was their favorite punching bag."
"When the known speedster with an archer for a sister tells you to lay off, people generally listen," Matt's tone holds no maliciousness or smugness. He sounds sad that he had to use his abilities and sister as a threat.
"Matt, stop with the guilty face," Jania doesn't even look at him," Luke, ideas?"
"Jani, I've offered him everything I know he loves. He. Won't. Budge," Luke gives her an irritated glare.
"Wait, you all are worried about him?" This shouldn't shock their parents, but it does. These five have grown up surrounded by death and misery, nothing seemed to phase them anymore. The hurt on their faces when Dick asks this question makes him want to take it back.
"Of course we are. He's our friend and our teammate. We love him," Sophie tilts her chin up," He just lost his sister and his parents kicked him out of their house blaming him for her death. That's pretty fucked up even by hero standards."
"Can't one of you like find a spell so he can talk to Mimi one last time," Matt asks the twins.
"That's serious dark magic. Even with the demonic energy in us, Luke and I don't have that power," Lila, the witch, explains," My powers are limited to the elements. I can't really use Mom's powers unless Luke helps."
"Yeah, and my magic is undetermined. We'd need a necromancer for the spell to be really effective."
"We have any of those on stand by?" Sophie asks.
"They're all dead," the twins answer.
"Fuck me," Sophie slams her head on the table. Victor slips out of the room as the other Titans begin to collaborate with the young team. He isn't sure how, but he's going to help Parker.
/Line Break/
Parker lays in his new bed, reminding himself to breathe. His chest has felt like this since she died. Tears fill his eyes at the thought of his baby sister. Her name was Minerva, but he called her Mimi. She was an illusionist. When she was sick, he would read her fantasy books and fairy tales. He'd come in after school and she'd be having a tea party with her favorite characters. She loved her big brother, begging him to show her his powers. He'd only do it if their parents were still at work. Her big brown eyes would widen with joy as he showed her the inside of his phone or the TV or whatever. Even when she was at her sickest and in the hospital, he'd be able to cheer her up.
Closing his eyes, he remembers her. She had thin black hair like his, always pulled into pigtails. Her eyes were always moving, always discovering something. She was the only one that could get him to laugh. She was funny, literally funny. She made everyone smile. Parker tries to focus on her smile. He wants to remember how happy she made him, how much she loved him. But he can't.
His mind wanders to that last day. She'd been in the hospital for a week. He visited her everyday after school. That day he brought her pink peonies, her favorite. He knew she would say he brought her her princess roses. The soft petals and fluffiness did remind him of a princess dress. He'd walked in and saw his parents. He looks nothing like his father. His father is white with thin brown hair and dark brown eyes. His Korean mother had her thick black hair pulled into a neat bun, dark eyes on her phone. Parker is the only one of his family to have blue eyes. Neither of them stopped him. He walked into his sister's room, expecting to hear her scream,"PAKA!"
He'd seen his sisters Katherine and Rose sitting on her bed, identical despite the three year age difference. They met their brother's eyes, tears filling theirs. Tears that their parents could never see. He dropped the flowers , moving to his little sisters. They held each other, all three of them crying silently. Katherine and Rose felt him shaking. Felt him holding himself together. He told them he loved them. It was the last time he was able to say it. He knew something was wrong, something in the machines, but when he tried to bring it up, none of them would listen- not his parents, not the doctors. He lets go of his sisters when their parents come in. They're told that Minerva (they hated nicknames) had passed away. His mother and father wouldn't look at Parker. He dismissed it as grief. As driven and cold hearted as they could be sometimes, he knew they loved all their children. Mimi dying hurt them more then they'd want to admit.
They kicked him out of the house a week later.
Parker forces his eyes open. The pain in his chest is worse than before. He feels tears in his eyes and lets them slide down his cheeks. He hates everything. He hates that this room isn't the one he grew up in. It had been the twins' father's room before they were born. Repurposed as a guest room. Guest. He's just a fucking inconvenience to them. Just a temporary annoyance. He can't fight like his friends can. He can't control his powers like them. He can't love people because they might be killed. He can't let anyone in because they'd see how fucked up he is and leave him. His friends seemed to know who they are, know their weaknesses and their strengths, know how to live. He can't find the energy most days to roll out of bed. He can't sleep most nights, just staring at the ceiling with his burning eyes, waiting for something. He can't eat. Everytime he tries, he ends up throwing up. He's tried so much to fix himself, but maybe his parents were right. Maybe he can't be fixed. Maybe he's too broken to love.
There's a knock on his door. He commands the door to slide open with a flick of his wrist. Victor walks in as Parker sits up. The cyborg was definitely his favorite Titan, though Parker would never say it out loud. Parker knows exactly how his body worked. Victor thought his technopathic abilites were amazing. Victor gives him a kind smile," Hey, little man. You left in a hurry today."
"Huh? Oh, yeah. Just needed some quiet. It's," He sighs," It's pretty loud around here."
"Yeah, I hear that," Victor gestures at a chair and Parker nods. The cyborg sits down gently, in case the chair won't hold,"You should have been here when the twins and Sophie were little. If it was quiet, they were doing something wrong."
"What's the worst thing you ever caught them doing?" Parker asks.
"We caught Luke shaving his head when he was about seven. That would be the reason he has a mohawk. It was the only way to keep him from being bald. Trust me that was one hell of an argument. Sophie got into her dad's utility belt when she was three or four. One of the explosives went off and her skirt caught fire. She got burned pretty bad."
"I thought Dick kept his belt locked up when he wasn't using it?" Parker frowns," and Sophie was invincible?"
"Her powers don't work when she's extremely scared or stressed. When she was a kid, Sophie didn't have great control of her powers to begin with. Still doesn't," Victor grins, letting Parker know it's ok to smile. Even though any indication of happiness in the past month has been fake, this one feels genuine. Victor takes pride in the ghost of a smile on the boy's face," and you're right, Dick does keep his belt locked up now, because of that."
"What about Lila?"
"Delilah Logan managed to cause the most trouble without meaning to."
"What do you mean?"
Victor rubs the back of his neck," Lila's powers didn't kick until she was six. There was some bad shit that happened to her involving a conniving dragon. She… You've seen her shut down right?" Parker nods. It wasn't often but there were times that she closed herself up. She'd sit in silence all day, trapped in her own head. Parker understands that," She was like that for six months. She wouldn't talk to any of us or let anyone help her. Things kept catching fire and disappearing. Again most trouble without meaning to."
"I guess that's why she and I get along so well. I still don't have a great control over my powers. Sometimes, electronics just fall apart or short circuit when I'm agitated," Parker remembers his daydream. Mimi squealing with joy," My sisters loved my powers. They thought it was cool. My parents not so much."
"Parker," Victor puts his hand on the edge of the bed," I know you're going through some shit right now. You're grieving for Mimi and I can imagine what it feels like being kicked out of your home. But I want you to know that we're all here for you. Me, Raven, Gar, Dick, Kor'i, Sophie, Luke, Lila, the Wests. We're all here for you. Whatever you need. We care about you."
"Why?" His voice cracks," I'm not a hero. I can't fly like Sophie or the twins, I can't fire an arrow like Jania, I can't run like Matt. I can't fight like them or help people like they can. I'm not super enough. I'm not-I'm not enough."
"Parker," Victor's voice is strong and kind," You've suffered so much. You might think we don't see it, but we do. You're right, you aren't like the others. But they were raised around heroes. Them being able to use their powers and fight came from a need to protect themselves. They all act calm and collected because they've seen us, older heroes, act like that. An unintentional lesson. They have to cut themselves off sometimes. They've seen horrors that most people their age will never see. I guarantee you if you asked them, they'd be willing to talk to you."
"But why do you care-"
"You're one of us." Victor says simply.
"A metahuman? A freak?"
"No." Victor decides to take a chance and puts a hand on Parker's shoulder. It should be cold and hard and unwelcome, but Parker's skin tingles with electricity. Victor's robotic hand feels like a normal hand, one that is firm and reassuring," You're someone who needs help. Everyone of us has been there. Dick, Kor'i, Gar, Rae, especially me. We needed people who saw passed our flaws, who saw us as we were even if we couldn't. Who loved us when we couldn't love ourselves. You are at that point in your life. You need people to help you. We want to help you."
Parker finds himself at a loss of words. The cyborg clearly had been thinking about this for a while. Maybe he'd been planning to help the twins or Sophie. Maybe he'd hoped to have a child of his own to help mentor. Maybe he bullshitted it. But he keeps his eyes trained on Parker's, red and brown meeting bright blue. Victor notices little bits of electricity in the young technopath's eyes. He stands," If you still want space, that's fine. Just know that we care about you. And we want to help you."
Victor begins to leave when Parker blurts out," You're human."
"Excuse me?" Victor turns.
"Lila's told me you don't feel human because of your robotics. That you don't feel human at all. But you're human to me. That sounded less creepy in my head," Parker groans into his hands," I was just trying to… shit I don't even know."
Victor smiles, touched by Parker's attempt to be kind," When you figure out what you want to say, I'll be in the garage. I could use some help."
Victor leaves. For five minutes, Parker sits on his borrowed bed. Everything in his body tells him to stay where he is, to cut himself off from everyone. Never let them find out how much of a fuck up he is. Never risk getting hurt again. But there's a tiny voice in his head, one that whispers maybe, just maybe things will he better this time around. Maybe they won't hurt him. They haven't so far. Parker uses every bit of strength the voice gives him and rolls out of bed. He heads to the door, with hope that the voice is right.
/line break/
It's been a month since Victor and Parker talked. He's been more social and has been receiving help. He'd been meeting with a therapist that specializes in hero psychology. She'd diagnosed him with depression. He's been taking antidepressants that seemed to be helping. His friends have been less brash with their offers to hang out. He found that he loved running with Jania because she knew all the best routes. Sophie has been teaching him some martial arts, using Matt for demonstrations. He'd even joined the twins in their monthly video game marathon. He'd also been spending time with the new adults in his life. He's shocked that Dick asks for his opinion on issues at dinner and overjoyed that everyone seems interested in his views. Garfield reminds him of the twins on their happy days, very loud and energetic, but kind. He always tries to make Parker smile. Raven and Koriand'r have become the mothers he wished he had growing up. Raven always makes him a cup of tea when she senses he's stressed or overwhelmed. The warm brew calms him down. He's noticed she does this for the twins as well, especially when they're agitated. Kor'i called him a bumgorf when asking him about his interests. He'd asked Sophie what it meant later. She'd explained it's a Tamaranian term of endearment for kids. It's like sweetheart or loved one.
He still likes Victor best, and now admits it. The cyborg had been teaching him about mechanics, answering his endless questions about robotics. In the garage, Victor had given him a table to himself. He's spent hours there, designing and building. He and Victor always find something to talk about. Victor knows when Parker is quiet because he's focused on his task and when he just wants to be alone. Parker is use to Lila's presence in the garage as well. Lila loves helping her Uncle Vic with his repairs, often singing along to the radio. He's used to the twins and Sophie pranking each other. He's used to the dinner conversations that become debates very easily. He's used to Sophie and her mother speaking in rapid Tamaranian, Sophie struggling a little, when they are having a conversation together. He's used to the alarms that go off at random times. He's used to the chaos of this family and he loves it.
Parker wakes up in his room on Thanksgiving morning. The room no longer felt strange. He'd been allowed to change it as he wanted. With the help of his friends, he'd removed the bottom bunk replacing it with another workbench. His dresser was filled with old machines and spare parts, all his clothes hung up neatly in the closet. The once green walls are now bright blue with pink peonies bursting across the room. Jania had helped him with the flowers. He rolls out of bed, going to his closet. Today would be the first family holiday he'd be spending with the Titans. At his parents' house, Thanksgiving was always a fancy party that he and his sisters never got to attend. This was supposed to be the year he'd be allowed to join the adult table. But he prefers the day to come. The Wests were joining them, along with a few other aunts and uncles. Parker had asked about dress code, feeling like an idiot. Dick had given him a kind smile and said semi formal, with a heavy emphasis on semi. Parker pulls on a pair of khaki pants and a blue button down. He ruffles his black hair. He'd let the thin locks start to grow out. His hair sticks out in different directions like he'd stuck his finger in a wall socket. Perfect.
"GET BACK HERE!" Luke runs past Parker in the hall to the common room, terrified. Sophie flies past him, literally. Her normally green eyes glow bright purple and a starbolt in each hand. Lila slides down the stair rail, smiling at him.
"Happy thanksgiving, Parker," She half sings. He smiles.
"Happy thanksgiving, Lila." He motions to the direction their friends went," What happened there?"
"Luke thought it would be funny to steal Sophie's laptop. You'd think being raised with her would let him know what a spectacularly bad idea that it."
"What are the chances of him being killed?"
"Minimal. We aren't allowed to kill each other national holidays. Maiming on the other hand is allowed." He's used to these kinds of conversations. In the common room (aka the kitchen/living room) Sophie fires starbolts with terrifying accuracy from the ceiling. Luke yelps as one hits his shoulder.
"DON'T! EVER! TOUCH! MY! LAPTOP! BIRDBRAIN!" She punctuates each word with a starbolt. Parker can tell they aren't too hot. Chances are they're only warm enough to be slightly painful.
"OK!" Luke shouts," I'm sorry! OW, THAT HURT!"
"Sophie, enough," Her father tells her. His daughter's temper never really came out, so he knew better than to cut it off too early," You two need to get dressed guests will be here in an hour."
Sophie glares at Luke one more time before flying out of the room. Parker helps Luke up," dude, you know Sophie loves that laptop like it's her child. Why-"
"Thought it'd be funny." He smiles a toothy grin then transforms into a weird looking bird. He flies out of the room.
"What-"
"Peregrine Falcon," Lila says," Fastest known bird alive."
"Wasn't that the name of a book?"
"That's Miss. Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children," Lila goes over to the piano near the window. The piano had been added in when she started learning how to play. Parker hears her roll her fingers over the keys effortlessly. The midmorning sunlight makes the red parts of her hair seem like fire and the green parts glow like emeralds.
"Morning, little man," Victor ruffles Parker's already messy hair," How'd you sleep?"
"Really good," He answers," How about you?"
"Got some good z's." Parker helps Victor set up a buffet table. Raven and Kor'i come in, talking about their past Thanksgivings.
"Good morning, my love," Kor'i kisses Dick's cheek. She smiles at Parker with the warmth of the sun," How are you, little bumgorf?"
"Very well thank you," He wants to add knorfka, a Tamaranian word for caregiver, but he doesn't feel right saying it," Sophie tried to kills Luke."
"I heard my Nightstar." Kor'i seems to beam even more with the mention of her only daughter. Garfield is the last one to come in, carrying bags of ice.
"Dad, you know I can make ice with the wave of my hand right?" Lila says.
"You're already using your magic to make sure the food is warm, baby girl. You don't have to do everything." Garfield sets the ice into a large metal cooler. Then he goes over to the piano," Speaking of warm."
Lila laughs as her father hugs her. Garfield kisses Raven, who continues her conversation with Kor'i," Happy Thanksgiving, Mama. Parker, what's good little dude?"
This question never seemed to get old. He liked that they asked him if he was ok, even if he had to say yes a million times. Luke comes back into the room. Parker gives a tiny sigh of relief, thankful he wasn't overdressed. Luke's khaki's are looser than Parker's and his flannel shirt is unbuttoned over a t-shirt, but none of the adults question it. Lila looks over at her brother.
"Luke, I thought you were going to dress nice this year?"
"I'm in Khaki's and a nice shirt, what more do you want, La?" Lila frowns in irritation at the nickname. Her green eyes glow white for a second. Wind appears out of nowhere, making Luke topple over the couch," HEY! No fair!"
Lila ignores him, playing a beautiful melody. Parker helps get the snacks out, putting them on the table they normally ate at. Last year he would have questioned the quantity of food they had, but that was before he was friends with Matt and Jania. Between them they could eat three everything pizzas and two gallons of ice cream and still have room for seconds. Dick joked at a dinner with the Wests once that watching Matt and Jania eat wasn't nearly as bad as Wally. Wally had told him to go to hell, with a big smile on his face. Parker liked that the Wests were going to be here, especially since he didn't know anyone else. Not knowing normal people is bad enough, not knowing heroes is worse.
"Stop overthinking," Parker jumps as Sophie appears next to him. The tights under her black skirt match her purple blouse. She lets her hair fall over her shoulders, curling loosely.
"Jesus, how do you do that?" He'd never understand how she moves around so silently.
"Practice. You're overthinking. Don't. Everyone's excited to meet you." Sophie puts a reassuring hand on his shoulder," Nothing bad is going to happen."
The window that also serves as a tv screen rings. Parker answers it with a wave of his hand.
"Prepare for trouble!"
"Make it double!"
Sophie groans," Maybe I spoke too soon."
"Hey, guys," Parker says to Matt and Jania who appear on the screen.
"Hey! We should be there in like ten minutes. Mom and Dad are still getting shit together." Jania seems like she's in a great mood. That scares them.
"Wanted to call and let ya know!" Matt too. Them being in a good mood leaves way too much to chance.
"Was the Pokemon reference really necessary?" Sophie asks.
"Have you met our dad? He'd disown us if we didn't make references everyone once in awhile." Jania chirps," Anyway just wanted to call. See ya soon."
"How did she end up being my best friend?" Sophie shakes her head.
"HEY!" Lila looks offended.
"Li, we took baths together. We're passed the point of being best friends." Lila seems satisfied with this.
"Oh, I remember when you were small enough to share a bath together," Kor'i muses," I wonder if we have any pictures-"
"Mom, for the love of x'hal, please don't. Jania's looking for any blackmail material and that's like handing her a key to the city." Sophie gives her mother a pouting face.
"Star, you know that face has never worked on me. Ever."
"Worth a shot, but seriously, please." It takes all of them to get the room ready. Raven uses her powers to organize the food that Dick and Kor'i pull from the fridge. Sophie and Luke fly around the room, hanging up decorations. Lila waves her hands, making wreaths of leaves appear all around the room. Parker helps Victor and Garfield fill a drink machine they used for parties. Once the Wests get there, everything is set up.
"Hey, guys!" Matt hugs Lila. It's a comical sight as Matt is nearly a foot taller than her. Lila, being five foot nothing, is the shortest on the team," Happy Thanksgiving."
"Hey, West," Sophie gives him a side hug. They'd moved on from straight hating each other tolerating each other's existence. Parker had ten dollars against Luke that they'd kiss before New Year's Day," You here to eat food?"
"That and run my mouth," He gives her a smirk.
"Oh so the only two things you can do?"
"Jesus Christ, get a room," Jania rolls her eyes. More heroes begin to arrive. Sophie squeals, actually squeals, when a tall man in a long coat enters the room.
"UNCLE JASON!" Sophie tackles him. More of the batfamily comes in. Sophie greats them each by name. Aunt Cass, Damian, Aunt Babs, Uncle Time, Aunt Stephanie. Dick is overjoyed to have his family together. Bruce, Sophie's grandfather, has so big party he can't get out of but sends his love. A green woman and man that looks like Superman with two boys send all his friends into a joyful tizzy. Aunt M'gann and Uncle Connor. He's heard a lot about them. M'gann is godmother to Jania, Luke, and Matt and Garfield's adopted sister. Conner is Jania and Lila's godfather. The boys must be Max and Kevin, their sons. A tall black man with blonde hair comes in with them, Kaldur. Matt's godfather. A few other heroes and nonheroes come. They're shocked when Wally's mother comes. At the end of it there are thirty people there.
It's amazing. Dinner is perfect, Lila showing off her powers by heating the food to the perfect temperature. Everything tastes amazing. He's even brave enough to eat some of the tofurkey that Lila, Garfield, and Sophie eat. The vegetables are all crisp and flavors explode in his mouth. He spends most of the day listening to hero stories. He listens to stories about his friends when they were little. He listens to stories about their parents when they'd first started the Young Justice team. He's amazed by everything. There's no restraint on powers. Luke and Lila compare powers with Max, the six year old. Kevin, the two year old, sits happily on his father's lap. Max changes his green skin to the same pale color of the twins, and turns his black hair blue. Sophie talks happily with her Uncle Jason, who calls her Baby Bird.
He's never felt so much love in a room. Even with his family reunions, there was never room for real love. Just who was better. But here, love oozes out between insults and compliments, stories to intrigue and to embarrass. By four pm, everyone is stuffed and talking still. Lila sits at the piano, most other seats having been taken.
"Play something, Lila," M'gann calls. Lila turns bright green.
"No one wants to hear me play."
"Yes, we do." Conner gives his niece an encouraging smile. Parker sees Lila beginning to panic as more people look at her. He slides next to her.
"Do you know the song from the Corpse Bride?" He murmurs.
"The duet?" He nods," Yeah."
"I'll play Victor's part. You do Emily." It's a short song, one that he'd watched a million times. Part of his powers was being able to download things into his brain. That was one of those things. Lila begins having played the song a millions times alone in her room. Her eyes stay on the keys at first. He joins her, humming along. Lila smiles, looking up to meet his eyes. Their hands fly over the keys, messing up notes here and there but smiling all the same. Everyone claps for them. She looks over at Sophie.
"'Member this one," Lila plays a soft melody, losing herself in the song. She opens her mouth and begins to sing," It's been a long day, without you my friend, but I'll tell you all about it when I see you again. We've come along way from where we began. Oh, I'll tell you all about it when I see you again, when I see you again."
Sophie sets down her drink, rapping out the next part perfectly," Damn, who knew? All the planes we flew. Good things we've been through, that I'll be standing right here talking to you,'Bout another path. I know we loved to hit the road and laugh, but something told me that it wouldn't last, had to switch up. Look at things different, see the bigger picture. Those were the days, hard work forever pays. Now I see you in a better place. Uh How can we not talk about family when family's all that we got? Everything I went through you were standing there by my side and now you gon' be with me for the last ride."
They sing the whole song together, everyone in the room captivated by the two young women. Lila's voice is warm and bursting with beauty, each note magic in itself. Sophie raps like she's reading poetry. From her lips, it seems like that's exactly what she's doing. At the end, everyone is blinking back tears. Sophie picks up her drink," We accept tips."
"How the hell..." Jania can't finish her sentence.
"Sophie and I like some of the same songs. We found ones that had rapping and singing in them. Called our little group Star Magic," Lila turns green again," I'd like the record to show that we were good at coming up with names."
"That's pretty spectacular, girls," Jason rubs his niece's head," Who knew little Nightstar could rap? Or Li could sing like that?"
Jania talks to Sophie about rapping, saying she likes some songs, but could never keep tempo. Lila plays a merry tune on the piano. Parker sits with Luke and Matt who compare scars. Most of the party clears out around five thirty, until it's the Wests, the Titans, and Parker.
"Today has been pretty amazing," Parker doesn't feel obligated to say that but he does. His stomach is comfortably full from the food, his friends made it through the day with minimal fights, and even better, everyone had liked him. Today couldn't get much better.
"But it's not over," Luke says. Parker looks around. Dick and Sophie are nowhere to be seen. Lila begins to play a song that he recognizes.
As Sophie and her father come in, carrying a cake, everyone in the room begins to sing," Happy Birthday to you, Happy birthday to you, Happy Birthday, Parker. Happy birthday to you."
Parker looks at the cake. It's shaped like a battery with "Happy 14th Birthday, Parker" written on top of it. He looks at everyone.
"I- I never told you when my birthday was," He stammers, unsure what to say.
"Dude, you do realize we have access to public records right? We know your blood type and social security number." Sophie snorts," Now make a wish."
Lila lights the candles with her hand. Parker looks around, at everyone smiling at him. At the love they clearly have for him. Everything they've done for him today and in the last two months. He closes his eyes and makes his wish. I wish they would ask me to stay forever.
"Yay!" Lila cheers, hugging Parker. He can feel her heart beating through the thin green dress she wore," Happy birthday!"
"Thanks. I don't know what to say."
"Nothing yet. You have to wait til after presents," Sophie hands him a box," This is from me and my parents."
They got him a book called Self-Defense for Dummies and a collapsible bow staff. Jania had gotten him an electric kit, the same one she used for her eletric arrows. Matt got him a Flash t-shirt. Luke got him a copy of Grimm's fairy tales, the ones he'd read to Mimi. Lila gives him a usb drive, saying she wrote him a song. The adults got him some clothes, all of which he loved. Victor got him a t-shirt that says SHOCKING in big letters surrounded by lightning. Parker says thank you about ten thousand times. The cake is his favorite. Marble with buttercream frosting.
"Again, didn't tell you this."
"Remember that conversation we had a few weeks back? About our past birthdays?" Jania asks. He nods," When we were talking about cake, Sophie watched your expression to see which you liked best."
"...You read my expression on the off chance that you could figure out my favorite cake?"
"Like it's hard?" Sophie snorts," I've been doing it since I was nine."
They argue about the practicality of this, Parker smiling the whole time. The Wests leave around eight. Victor and Parker are the last ones in the common room, taking the buffet table apart.
"Good birthday?" He asks.
"The best. Thank you. For everything you all have done."
/Line break/
Parker wakes up unable to breathe. Black hair sticks to his sweaty forehead as he tries to catch his breathe. He swears he can feel the water in his lungs as he pants. His bedroom feels suddenly very cramped even though it is fairly spacious. Tossing the covers aside he walks out of the room.
There's a certain calming aspect of walking through the tower halls at night. The quiet patting of his feet as he walks, his slow breaths echoing down the halls, the way that everything that seems so normal during the day becomes something new or different in the shadows. However the majorly fucked up portion of his brain always plays horror movie music and he gets this itch in between his shoulders, waiting for the bullet to find him or a blade to sink into his flesh. He walks past Lila's room and, for a moment, considers knocking. It's not like he would be waking her up. There's light coming from under the door and her hears the soft melody of a lullaby coming from her speakers. Something holds him back. Some nagging voice in the back of his head that makes him keep walking.
Down the stairs to the garage. Lights flicker on as he steps in, so bright that his eyes burn. Even after they have adjusted to the light, they're still burning. His breathing comes faster and his chest tightens. He tries to exhale but it comes out in a yell. He yells and yells and yells.
Years of suppressed anger and hurt surfaces, coming in screams and tears. Through his blurred vision, he sees the work table that Victor had let him work at. On it are the gifts he had painstakingly worked on to give his friends for Christmas. In an instant, he's throwing the inventions against the wall, watching them shatter into a million pieces. Glass and metal and wires flying everywhere. He throws more of his inventions and prototypes and screams. He hates his parents. He hates that they never saw him as good enough. He hates that they abandoned him. He hates, that despite all of the shit they've put him through, a small part of him still loves them.
Hot tears fall down his cheeks as he thinks about his sisters. Katherine, despite doing nothing most of her life to help him, had been caught more than once looking at his designs. Rose loved all of them, and Parker's still convinced she's the one that would leave them treats on their pillows when either he or Katherine had a bad day, and played with Mimi every chance she got. God, Mimi. He still sees her, her small button noses, her small pink lips that she bit in concentration. He can still smell the peonies that he bought that day. God does he remember that day.
It had been a good day, which should have tipped him off. His mom and dad spoke civilly toward him, even wished him a good day. He'd spent all day with his friends, talking with them about their families, watching them show off their many scars and proudly saying how they got them, even showing them a few of his designs, something he had never done before with anyone. During their study period, they went outside and lay under a tree. They talked some, but during a lazy moment, Lila sang to all of them. Her voice was soft, but soothing. The words roll over in his head. Open your eyes, and know you're free to come alive, you gotta live it while we can, we only get one life. With Lila singing and the warm sun on his face, surrounded by people he was starting to trust, Parker could feel his wall coming down. Everything was perfect. He'd stopped at that flower shop that he loved and bought a bunch of peonies. He wanted to surprise her and he thought they were overdue for a tea party with the Mad Hatter and the March Hare. He was beaming when he entered the hospital, practically hearing her calling his name, Paka, and he'd see her. Sitting up in her hospital bed, her black hair far too long and tangled up, squeezing Hare in her tiny arms. He couldn't wait to see her and he didn't notice the way the nurse that signed him in looked at him with pity. He didn't know what had happened. He'd wanted to cry and scream just like he had now. Only now he's alone.
Parker isn't sure how long he's down on the ground, just that his voice is nearly gone and his eyes are sore and heavy. Soon the only sounds are the echos of Mimi laughing and his screams. A heavy hand is placed gently on his shoulder.
"Parker?" Parker looks up and sees Victor looking at him with concern," I would ask if you're ok, but I think I already know the answer to that."
"Why are you down here?" It hurts to talk above a whisper.
"You weren't at breakfast," Since he'd lost his appetite and had gone days at a time without eating, the titan's took it upon themselves to make sure they knew where he was every meal," Lila said she heard you coming down here around three or four this morning."
Victor helps the shaken teen up. Dried blood cakes his hands from slamming them into glass shards and metal fragments. Fifteen years ago, this might have worried Victor, but between his nieces and nephew, he knows that kids often hurt themselves and won't even realize it until later. Victor pulls out a first aid kit and fishes around for an alcohol wipe and bandages. Parker winces as the cyborg cleans the blood away from the cuts. Why doesn't Victor just give him the wipe, he's 14 for god's sake.
"I have a system," Victor says," You aren't exactly the first person to have a melt down in here."
"Luke? Lila?" Parker guesses.
"Them, Sophie, Dick, Kor'i, Garfield, Raven, even me." Victor pulls a piece of metal from the side of Parker's left hand, causing him to wince in pain," I'm not sure what you've heard about superheroes, but we aren't invincible."
"What about Kor'i?" Parker whispers with a weak smile that falls immediately.
"Physically, sure, but I'm talking about in here," Victor taps a metallic finger on Parker's forehead," Everyone has something or things that eat away at them until they let it out."
"I don't think that I've seen Sophie or Luke or Lila let anything out since I've meet them."
Victor smiles knowingly," Why do you think Lila is as into music as she is? Why Luke hides away in his room with a book? Why Sophie is either flinging herself into the air or breaking into any computer she can get her hands on? They know their limits and know when to talk to us, but they have their own ways to slow the bad things down."
"We didn't do that at my parents' house. We, my sisters and I, learned to bury our emotions. Even after Mimi got sick… Our parents wanted these perfectly normal children. Mimi had an excuse to see a psychiatrist, with all the stuff going on with her, but Katherine, Rose, and I had to be strong. Even when she would start shaking or crash we couldn't let anything show," Parker looks at the floor," Even when we were kids, we had to keep everything inside."
Victor finished wrapping Parker's hands and sits across from him," When I was 18, I was in an accident. It killed my mother and the only way my father could save me was to make me this. For two or so years, I hid, I hated myself, and I wished I had died in that accident, or my dad had been able to let me go."
"What changed?"
"Well, this crazy alien girl escaped from these other aliens. They attacked the city, making me team up with this runty green kid that sounded like he was from the military, the boy wonder, a very quiet witch and the crazy alien girl. I haven't been able to lose them yet. Hell I gained two nieces, who are polar opposites but are like sisters, and a nephew, who goes back and forth between annoying and lovable. There have been times when I've wanted to walk away, when it wasn't worth it to stay, but I learned something watchin' them grow up. You can't trust someone to have your back and care about you if you don't let them in."
"If people see my dark, they'll leave." Parker whispers. Victor gets this chill that this isn't Parker speaking. It's someone else that has pounded this into his head.
"Parker," Victor speaks so gently that Parker looks up," We already love you. Dick, Kor'i, Garfield, Raven, the twins, Sophie and me, all of us love you. And love isn't something that we give out lightly. Just yesterday, Luke made a joke about how it was about time we had another boy in the family. There's nothing you could say or do or feel that would drive us away. You're stuck with us whether you like it or not."
Parker hesitates before the words start, softly at first," My parents come from really big families and there are a lot of metahumans in them. Mom and Dad were resentful towards their powered siblings so I saw them once a year: Christmas for my dad's family and a week in the summer for my mom's. Dad's family had this tradition for when you turned six, you got to change your name. Like a six year old knows what they want to be called. I had just turned six and it was a day long affair. I knew I wanted to be called Parker after Parker Mathews, the inventor, but no one was listening to me. Everyone was giving me name suggestions and I got flustered. I remember looking at the tv and it just fell apart. Everyone jumped and no one knew what happened. I kept staring at it and it rebuild itself. I saw where everything had to go and it went there. My aunts, uncles, and cousins were all thrilled, but I was terrified. I knew how my parents felt. Even though they were smiling, I could feel their disgust.
Parker pauses," I should have been happy. Hell, I had secretly been hoping for something, anything, just to spite my parents. Then it happened and I was afraid."
"What happened?"
"You know how after I shower or wash the dishes, I can't use my powers? They figured that out. Dad would fill this basin with water and… he'd hold me there. Not long enough to do brain damage, but he was trying to make me normal," Parker pulls his knees up onto the table," That summer, they sent me to Oakhaven Pediatric Psychological Hospital. They had a special wing for kids like me. Metahumans. They crushed pills in our food, kept it so cold I saw kids lose toes and doctors told us we were hurting our families by having our powers. My parents gave them permission to do electroshock therapy. I have huge chunks of the first seven years of my life missing, and I can still feel the electricity going through my head and it hurts," his voice breaks," But it didn't last super long. I kept breaking the machines."
"Parker," Victor looks at the teen with concern. To keep something like that locked inside for as long as he has.
"It's my fault," Parker says, his voice breaking even more. It hurts his already sore throat," All of this. I'm the reason Mimi died. I'm the reason my parents act the way they do. I should be at home, encouraging Rose and Katherine to be different, but I'm not there. I'm here. I should be stronger for my friends because who am I to complain? At least growing up, I never had to worry about spending as much time with my parents because they could be dead in a few hours. I'm not enough. People need me and I'm not enough for them."
Victor wants to break in, to let Parker know that all of this simply isn't true, but he also knows from experience that right now Parker needs to get this out.
"The nightmares I've been having, They're all him. I'm underwater except I'm my age now. I couldn't fight back when I was little, but I can't even fight now. I wake up and I can't breathe. I feel water in my lungs and I can't breathe anymore. Then the moment passes and everything is ok…"
They sit there is quiet for a minute. Parker asks," So now what? What wisdom do you have from your experience?"
"Nice to see we have another smart ass in the family," Victor grabs two brooms and hands one to Parker," You can help me clean up. And when you get a chance, Put the machines back would you?"
"Yes, Sir," Parker looks around the room. Drills fly together, saws whirl to life, inventions are fixed and there is a considerably smaller amount of crap on the floor," Victor?"
"Yeah?"
"Am I really part of the family?" The poor kid has such a hopeful expression on his face that Victor recognizes. He wants so desperately to be apart of something.
Victor hugs Parker. He's done this so many times to Sophie, Luke, and Lila, just to reassure them. They always flinched, not meaning to, when the metal touched them. It has always been a reminder of his disability. Parker doesn't flinch. Just like their first talk, Parker doesn't feel the mechanics. The electricity in Victor's body feels normal to him, like a heartbeat. Parker hesitates before hugging Victor back. He closes his eyes, feeling safe and protected in the man's embrace.
"Of course you are. We don't abandon our own. Especially when they've survived what you have."
/Line Break/
Christmas Day comes around three weeks later. Parker had fallen asleep on the couch watching Christmas movies with Sophie, Luke, and Lila. They'd stayed up late, talking about the past Christmases. The trio had been raised together and it showed around the holidays. But Parker doesn't feel as left out as he did three months ago. He laughed as Lila pantomimes the joy she'd had when she'd gotten a piano. They stir to a delicious smell. Sophie groans, not a morning person," Pancakes?"
"Christmas tradition, Starshine." Dick whistles as he flips pancakes. Parker's noticed Sophie's parents don't use her first name, Mar'i. He knows Sophie hates her first name, but won't tell them why, and goes by her middle name. Though she has an abundance of nicknames in her family, most commonly Star and Starshine.
"Looks like Santa came," Luke ruffles his purple hair. He'd been growing the top of his hair out, keeping the sides shaved. Lila's short bob sticks up as she stretches her arms. The twins jump over the couch, energy already hitting them. Sophie takes her blanket and pulls it over her head, grumbling about morning people. Parker looks at the gifts under the tree. There's a pile for each of them, gifts from relatives having been mailed in. Kor'i leans over the couch, pulling the covers off Sophie.
"Do you remember our first christmas together, friends?" Kor'i asks the adults.
"I remember Gar accidentally setting himself on fire." Raven grins. Garfield sticks his tongue out at her.
"I remember Mumbo attacking the bank. Dick gave him one hell of a present," Victor flips sausage patties. Parker's stomach growls at the smell of food. One thing he could say for the heroes is they could cook. Everyone helped with the cooking and every meal was an adventure. Sophie's vegetarian and Lila and Garfield are vegan. They make veggie versions of whatever the others have for dinner. Parker's favorite dish so far has been Dick's pancakes. If they bugged him enough, he'd make them on a Saturday morning. Sophie starts laughing as her mother begins tickling her.
"Mom! No fair! No fair!" Sophie starts floating as she laughs. She flies away from her mother, who follows her. Parker likes when Sophie's like this. She's so serious sometimes he forgets she's 13. She dive bombs, trying to pull up, but crashes into Lila.
"OW!" both girls yell. Lila rubs her head, not helping her hair at all.
"I should have gotten you a damn parachute for Christmas," She says.
"Sorry, bad angle." Sophie jumps up, now awake. They eat breakfast first, no rush for the presents. Parker laughs and teases everyone like he's always been here. Since Victor had said he was part of their family, he's believed them. He wanted to stay forever. He feels so loved.
"Present time!" The kids all run to the tree. They go in alphabetical order with Lila first. Parker's gift to her is a music box that has a tiny automaton inside. If she plays music, the robot will dance. Lila loves it. Parker got Luke a t-shirt that says "I don't know, I'm winging it" and Sophie a device that plugs into her laptop and shows different constellations. He even made presents for the adults. Escrima sticks with built in tasers for Dick, a self heating mug for Raven, a set of remodeled video game controllers for Victor and Garfield, and a snowglobe for Kor'i. With his powers, most of the time was spent designing gifts. Jania had given him some pointers to help with the drawing part. His gifts for them were in his room. Parker gets a bunch of great gifts. Books on robotics, t-shirts with electronic jokes, a coupon book from Sophie for free training lessons.
"If you're trying to tell me something, Soph, you should just say it," He says, grinning.
"Dude, I was trained in like a bajillion different styles, you should be grateful for the opportunity," Sophie winks at him. The presents under the tree are soon gone, except for one.
"Last gift," Lila reaches for it," Who's it belong to?"
"It's for Parker," Victor tries not to sound nervous. Parker takes the box from Lila. He unties the ribbon and pulls the lid off the box. He stares down into the gift, unable to speak," Parker?"
"Are you serious?" Parker looks at Victor with tears filling his eyes. Victor nods, fighting the urge to cry. Parker tosses the gift to the side and runs to the metallic man. He throws his arms around him and sobs with joy. Victor holds him tightly, crying too.
"What's going on?" Sophie asks. Parker pulls away from Victor and faces everyone. Raven can feel the joy radiating off the two.
"It's a petition to adopt. Victor wants to adopt me," His voice breaks and he's crying again. Kor'i hugs him.
"Why are you sad?"
"I'm not sad. A man who took the time to get to know me to help me to teach me to love me just asked to be my father. I've never been happier," Parker tells them. Sophie and the twins tackle Parker with hugs and exclamations of being family. Sophie reminds him that she's the oldest, even though he's nearly a year older than her.
Parker can't stop smiling. The past three months have been hard, without a doubt. He misses his sisters with all his heart. He's been kicked out and forced into a world he never thought he could be apart of. But this world, full of chaos and danger, has been one that accepted him. The people in accept his flaws, accept that he's not perfect, accept his past. They love him, tease him, work with him. They take pride in his accomplishments, even if it's something as simple as eating three meals that day. This family, his family, is thrown together. Misfits that tried to escape their past had brought forth three children who have lived in uncertainty their who lives. They looked at him and decided he was enough. He was enough to love. He was enough to be wanted.
Parker looks at his new family. His new uncles pat him on the back, both proud. His new aunts, women who feel more like mothers to him, kiss his cheeks. His new cousins, his friends, his teammates tell him how much fun it's going to be. They talk about training him and helping him with his powers. They talk about the future, a future with him in it. A future where he saves people, where he is a hero. Sophie and the twins joking say his hero name should be Electrode or Watts. They talk about him being something he never thought he could be.
Parker looks at Victor. His father. Victor beams at the young technopath. Parker tries not to burst into tears again. He realizes just how much he's relied on Victor the last few months. Since that first talk, Parker has always wanted Victor's approval. His birthday wish comes back to mind. He thought he had wished for the Titan's ask him to stay forever. He thought they were the people for him. Now he realizes he wanted Victor to ask him to stay. He wanted to be wanted. On this morning, the most magical Christmas he'd ever had, he got exactly what he wanted. And even better, Victor did too. He got a son who's seen too much but looks at the wreckage with a new mindset. Not what did I do to cause this? but What can I make from this? Victor and Parker have been thrown from their families because they were different. Because they were broken and too much to handle. Now they had a family with the titans. Now they were a family together.
Author's note: Oh my god, I made myself cry again. I never figured out how Cyborg would have kids of his own (really didn't want to think about it either) but I liked the idea of Parker and him becoming a family. They have a different dynamic, since Parker is 14 and not biologically Victor's son. But I love this. I love the idea of adopted families and thrown together families. Anyway, hope Y'all liked it!
Songs referenced in the fic are One life by Boyce Avenue and See You Again by Wiz Khalifa and Charlie Puth.