Dreaming Awake

AN:So, I finished playing Halo 4 in under 10 hours (as a speed-thru, I am going to go back and play it properly) and the ending left me wanting to crawl into a hole and cry. BUT, it also left this plot bunny sitting in my head that kept nibbling at my brain telling to to write it! So, I have tried to leave it relatively spoiler-free, but well... I hope people enjoy!

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He knew he was dreaming the instant she stepped out from the swirling fog surrounding him. Just seeing her again, even in his memories or dreams, was enough to cause his heart to skip a beat. Seeing that familiar smile on her face was like a kick to the teeth.

"Cortana," he almost whispered, and he belatedly realised that although he was wearing his armour, he was standing without his helmet.

He watched her carefully as she continued slowly towards him, and he knew then, that this was not a dream.

Cortana glided over to him, all feminine curves and grace walking on two legs towards him. The closer she got to him, the more he noticed the differences in her appearance; her hair was a stunning shade of deep purple – almost black – and her blue eyes virtually glowed an ethereal blue, smiling in sheer happiness at obviously seeing him again. Her hair, once cut to around her ears, grew in long tendrils down her back, curling at the tips around her waist in to small spirals. The clothes she wore were different as well, the body-suit replaced by a light blue flowing gown that both hugged her curves and floated around her body like the mist that surrounded them both. The neckline plunged modestly down between her breasts, giving John a tantalising hint of the curves he had known many women to envy.

His AI was not longer that, and AI, but was a flesh and blood human.

It was then that he noticed the thin gold chain that dangled down from around her neck, swinging in time to her steps. The pendant that hung from the end of it was gold in colour, and shaped like an arrow with a ridged line cutting it in half. One side of the pendant was gold, and the other... it was difficult to describe. Colour flashed through it with each of her steps, at once refracting the light, and then seeming to suck it in.

An eternity and yet a second seemed to have passed since John had caught sight of his lost AI, but before he realised it, she was standing in front of him again, watching in stunned silence as she stood in front of him, her eyes glowing with her happiness.

"Hello John," she said finally, her voice the same as he remembered it. She looked up at him, sensing his confusion. "Cat got your tongue?" she asked cheekily, grinning then.

Feeling like he had taken a plasma round to his chest, John took a deep breath, fighting the urge to scoop her up into his arms and never let her go. "How...?" was all he could ask, feeling his fingers itching to make sure that this was real.

Rolling her eyes, Cortana shrugged, the smile gone from her face and replaced with the sadness he had seen when... "Honestly, I don't know. But there are some things that I do know but can't tell you yet."

That got his attention. "Can't, or won't?"

She turned to look back at him, her white teeth worrying her bottom lip. "Can't. I'm not allowed to." She whispered, looking anywhere but his eyes.

"Cortana," he said, the warning in his voice. He took a small step forward, one of his hands moving of their own accord and picking up her tiny hand in his. "You've been dead for five years, but you're standing here in front of me." He let her interpret what he wanted to hear, for once in his life, the words just dying to literally spew forth in a word vomit for her to clean up. He was never a man of words; that was where Cortana had come in. She always knew the words to say and when to say them, whereas he took his orders and followed them through.

There was only once that he had failed that mission objective.

Cortana shook her head, finally looking up at him. Tears dance in her eyes, but almost instinctively he knew that they were happy tears. They swelled up and slipped down her cheeks, and he couldn't help himself as his hands dropped her own and cupped her face, using his thumbs to gently wipe the tears away. Never before had he been as gentle with anything in his life, and the feeling was almost like ecstasy. He watched as she closed her eyes and turned her face in to his hands, her pink lips brushing gently against the pads of his thumb.

The breath that he hadn't known he was holding, escaped from his lungs, and his heart thundered in his chest. An emotion that he couldn't name swelled at her actions, and with a shock, he realised that it was only whenever Cortana was near that he felt it.

"I'm sorry, John," came her whisper against his hands, and he stared at her, deep brown meeting glowing blue.

"What do you mean?" he answered, his deep voice uncharacteristically more quiet than usual.

She closed her eyes then, a quiet sigh leaving her lips. "For leaving you alone," came her answer, opening her eyes to gauge his reaction.

Several seconds passed as they stared at one another, and when John moved, even he was shocked at his actions. He gently pulled Cortana closer to him, his large hands sliding down her face to wrap themselves around her body. He lowered his face to nuzzle against her neck, feeling her stiffen up at first before almost melting into his embrace. He felt her own arms wrapping around him, her tiny hands cradling the back of his head as her face rubbed against short hair.

They were silent, content to just hold one another. For how long they stood there, John had no idea, but it was Cortana who spoke first, her soft voice tickling his ear. "I'm sorry I can't answer your questions, John, but know this," she said, shifting and pulling away slighting so that she could see his face again. She moved her hands to cradle his face, her eyes glowing again with an emotion that, while John couldn't name, caused his entire being to flame and feel light. "We will see each other again."

She said it with such conviction that John actually believed her. He tightened his hold on her waist, feeling the beginnings of a smile on his face as he stared down at her. It felt amazing to hold her, the feel of her tiny body light and soft as opposed to his large and steel-hard being. "When?" he asked, searching her face.

"Soon," she answered, suddenly turning her head away, her blue eyes going distant. A frown grew on her face which was quickly replaced by that same sad smile he had seen her wear when she had said goodbye before...

"Cortana?"

She turned back to him, tears once again building in her eyes. "I'm sorry John," she whispered, letting go of his face and slowly pushing herself away, "I have to go."

An irrational thought streaked through his brain, and he had to fight with himself to hold on to her with all his might and never, ever let her go. Instead, he let his hands slide off of her waist, his fingers itching to grab her again. He clenched them hard, just in-case they decided to go against his will. "Where are you going?" he asked, almost desperate to keep her here – wherever here was – for just a little while longer.

Cortana stopped walking backwards and stood in her signature pose that brought a rush of memories to John. She smirked at him, her hair swinging behind her. "Back home," she grinned, "But don't worry, John we'll see each other soon enough."

A spike of unadulterated happiness that he hadn't felt in a long time, shot through John, and a grin to rival Cortana's spread on his face. "Is that so?" he asked, watching as Cortana's entire countenance seemed to change. Gone was the cocky smile on her face and with it was replace by awe.

Seeming to shake herself, Cortana gave him a small, almost bashful smile in return. She took a deep breath and straightened herself out, her eyes glowing with yet another emotion that he couldn't name. "Yes it is," she smirked, falling easily into their old routine, "The Librarian said so." She grinned, watching as John seemed to falter before her.

"The Librarian?" he asked, knowing he shouldn't really be shocked, but he was.

Cortana nodded her head, her smirk gentling into a genuine smile. "Oh, and John?"

The Spartan in question looked up at her, a frown having replaced the smile. "Yes, Cortana?"

"You should smile more often." She replied.

They stared at one another for several more seconds before his reply came in the form of smile which was still on his face when he woke up on his cot aboard the UNSC Infinity.