Yukari Gets Crabs

Nyamo groaned and looked over at the clock. Five A.M. She groped around until she found the ringing phone.

"H'llo?"

"You've got to help me!" Yukari. Naturally.

"What's wrong?"

"After you left last night I met this guy. And, well, I was pretty drunk but I think…" Her voice dropped to a conspiratorial whisper. "I think he gave me crabs!"

"Yukari, Jeez! You slept with a guy you just met? ?"

"Huh? I did not sleep with him! Get your mind out of the gutter!"

Nyamo sighed. "Yukari I don't know what you think crabs are but you get them by-"

"I know that! I mean like snow crabs!"

Nyamo resisted the urge to bang her head against the wall. "So some random guy gave you seafood. That's pretty unusual but it doesn't qualify as an emergency."

"But they're-"

"If they're no good then just throw them out and stop accepting presents from people in bars."

"But they're banging around in the fridge trying to get out!" She whimpered.

"Oh I'll be right there! !" Nyamo growled and slammed the phone down.

She rolled over and lay staring at the ceiling trying to think through her pounding hangover. Yukari's parents were out of town. There was probably a mouse scratching around behind the refrigerator scaring her.

She wondered if she could just take the phone off the hook and get back to sleep. No, if Yukari was scared enough she might show up here and crawl into bed with her or something. She sighed and sat up to pull on her jeans.

Yukari was waiting at the door. She wore shorts and a t-shirt she'd obviously been sleeping in. She was holding a golf club like a weapon and she really did look scared.

"Okay, I'm here. Show me what's wrong."

Yukari led her to the kitchen and pointed to the fridge. "They're in there."

It was all dented and mangled. Had she been beating on it with the golf club? Her parents would be pissed! Nyamo went toward it and saw that the dents looked all wrong, They looked like they were made from the inside. As she reached for the handle there was a bang like a shot and another bulge appeared in the door.

She screamed and jumped back. "There's something in there!"

"I told you!"

What could possibly be in the Yukari's fridge that could do that? "Um, okay, give me that thing."

Yukari handed over the golf club and she reached for the handle again, holding the club up to strike. She eased the door open.

The inside of the fridge was trashed. The light bulb was broken, shelves hung twisted and broken, leftovers were smashed and mangled, and all the jars were shattered. A foul smelling mix of condiments and what was probably excrement dripped out onto the floor. Then some of the unidentifiable lumps at the back of the darkened fridge began to move. Several huge, spiky crablike creatures nearly the size of basketballs rushed forward hissing and snapping their long, dangerous looking claws.

Nyamo slammed the door just before they could pounce at her. Two huge claws still stuck out, snapping. She beat on one with the golf club while she kicked at the other. It caught the toe of her slipper and sheered it off cleanly. Yukari leaned against the door to hold it closed and she whacked the claw as hard as she could, finally breaking it off. It fell to the floor, still snapping, and they finally got the door closed and sealed.

Nyamo sat down at the table breathing hard. "Who the hell was this guy! And how the hell did you get those things in there!"

"I-I don't really remember. I think he was a foreigner. They weren't that big before. And I thought they were dead. What do you think we should do? Call the cops?"

"Well, that won't do much good since you don't even remember what he looked like. How about animal control? No, there won't be anybody there early on a Sunday morning. Maybe call an exterminator?"

"I don't have money for an exterminator!"

Nyamo held her head. "Okay, okay. Don't shout!"

"Hey, let's call Tomo!"

"Tomo? Why?"

"She killed a cockroach in class once."

"Those things aren't cockroaches."

But Yukari was already in the other room talking on the phone loudly. Well, Tomo was always full of energy at least. Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea.

Yukari returned. "Man, that girl has a dirty mouth outside of school. And no respect for her teachers!"

"I guess she doesn't like you screaming in her ear at five-thirty in the morning. Imagine that. So she's not coming?"

"No, she'll be here in a few minutes."

"Great. Do you have any coffee?"

Soon another loud banging made them both jump but this time it was only the front door. Yukari went to answer it and found Tomo and a very sleepy and angry looking Yomi on the porch.

"Let's see the two thousand yen, Yukari. I'm not killing any bugs till I know you have it."

"And I get half since you dragged me out here." Yomi grumbled, taking off her glasses to rub her sleepy eyes.

"Yeah, yeah, we'll talk."

"Just get in here!" Yukari dragged them both inside.

Just then there was a crash and the sound of tearing metal from the kitchen. They all ran in, hearing Nyamo screaming and smashing things.

They burst into the kitchen to find Nyamo standing on the counter, the refrigerator laying open on it's side, and a slimy trail leading into the hall.

"They got out." Nyamo pointed with her bent golf club. "And they're even bigger than before. Damn it, why didn't I just stay in bed!"

Lol I don't really know what this story is. I just came up with the title because of Yukari's obsession with crabs and wrote something.