A string of very interesting incidents had brought us to this point. This point being the point at which Pippin and I are lying in a ditch waiting for the furious mob of hobbits to find us and attempt to kill us.

It all started with carrots. Go figure. Every thing with Pippin starts with carrots. Or any other type of food he has gone and stolen.

You see, Pippin decided that I was going to help him get some food, so of course I thought nothing of it and we stole them and (miraculously) got away with it. If only we were always so lucky. As soon as we got the carrots back to my kitchen, Pippin decided it was a good time to tackle me and- well…

Pippin had led a very sheltered life. A little rich hobbit lad, thin and often sickly, he didn't exactly have real world experience. So he didn't know that what he was doing was wrong. All he knew was what he felt and that was love.

Pippin kissed me. Just once that day. I was far too shocked to do anything, so he just left. I was blind to the fact that he just didn't know lads didn't have relations with other lads. I thought he knew, and so I thought he was disregarding the rules and doing what he thought was right and I decided that I loved him too.

I decided that I could disregard the rules also.

I decided to go tell him that. And so I found him, and I kissed him. And he kissed me. And someone saw. And that someone told.

It was just bad luck the maid had caught us, had caught us and we didn't even notice.

Pippin, being as sheltered as he was, was very shocked when he went into town the next day and found no one would speak to him, look at him or touch him.

He came home and asked me what was going on and I told him, Pippin honey, I thought you knew! And he said, Knew what? And them I realized I had made a very big mistake. I knew, Great! Now the whole Shire knows and they'll run us out for sure.

Poor Pippin. He broke down rather badly.

But when the Shire in angry mob form came a-knockin' he collected himself rather well. We ran for our lives. Literally.

And now we come to this point. The point at which they found us. The point at which they tore me away from my sweet little cousin, who never knew any better. And before they dragged him from my arms, I whispered to him, Oh my Pippin, no matter what happens, know that I love you. Know that I always will. And just before I had to let go, because I was frightened I might tear him in half he said to me, Merry, I'll love you as long as I draw breath, and so long after that…

And that was the end. I was run out of Buckland, and I wandered through the old forest for weeks until I finally came through and I found myself in Bree. I have lived in this town, quietly on the outskirts, where no one bothers me and I don't bother them.

I never saw my Pippin again. But I knew that if he was alive, he still loved me. If he was dead, he still loved me. And no matter what anyone said, Pippin, pure innocent Pippin, was going to heaven in a handbasket.

Well, there you go readers. I would've had it up sooner, but was a bit de-funkitized.

Review if you would.

Also - I don't make any money- only happiness through twisting someone elses world into little knots.