About Damn Time for a Change (or Men are Stupid) by Luvscharlie
Warnings: Mpreg and man-bashing
A/N: Originally written for the 2011 Mini-event of Crack my Squick at hp_porninthesun, where there was a maximum word count of 300 and the squick to be "cracked" was mpreg for blacks_kitten on LJ.
"You know women have been doing this for years." Hermione's hand was on her hip and she was glaring at her complaining, large-bellied, just about to pop at any time husband.
Draco snarled and tried to cross his legs as he sat at the kitchen table. That didn't work so well and he snarled again. "Who the fuck's bright idea was this?" He rubbed his belly, which presently felt as if there was a cart-wheeling squirrel doing battle with a ninja inside it.
"The Department of Equal Rights for Witches. Did you know your mother is the founding member?"
"What the hell? My own mother did this to me?"
"Well, not her alone." Hermione smiled. "I mean our sex has been doing this for generations. It's time for a change. Toss up the gene pool a bit."
"It's still the same genes!" Draco shouted. Tossing his hands up. His chair wobbled at the shift in weight.
Hermione smirked a satisfied smirk. "I know, but it was a man she made that argument to, and they're not all that bright. You really have to love the Wizarding world, I mean there's no other place in this world that I could get a penis every time you ovulate. What about that is not to love?"
"Only everything," Draco retorted. "The man who created that Reversal Potion is so going to hell."
"As if a man would be bright enough to think that up." Hermione was only glad that she'd learned about pen names before she'd submitted that little bit of genius to the Department of Procreation at St. Mungo's. She doubted her husband would thank her when it was time for labour and delivery.