"Are you kidding me right now?" The glossy magazine creased under Pepper's perfectly manicured hand. She let her heel click on the tile, impatience evident.
Steve, at least, had the sense to look ashamed. Tony, sitting next to him on the couch, just grinned broadly at his former assistant, current CEO. The silence stretched on.
Pepper growled through clenched teeth. That was the only word Steve could think to use to describe the sound that emanated from the woman. "How am I supposed to keep this relationship – the relationship you two insist on having, despite how it raises my blood pressure on a daily basis - if you're just going to turn around and do this at a photo shoot?"
Steve opened his mouth, presumably to mumble an apology, but Clint chose that moment to walk into the living room. He took one look at the photo twisted under Pepper's fingers and burst out laughing.
Pepper narrowed her eyes.
"And this is why we don't do photo shoots," Phil Coulson commented from his place at the nearby table, files spread out before him. Clint gripped the Agent's shoulder as he walked to the kitchen.
"You two don't do photo shoots," Tony began, "because no one knows Phil is anything other than a paper-pusher."
Clint smirked around a cup of coffee. "He's definitely all that and then some."
"And anyone outside of a select few who know that Barton, usually don't leave S.H.I.E.L.D headquarters for a long, long, time," Phil added. "So, no, no photo shoots."
"Can we focus?" Pepper demands, throwing the magazine on the coffee table. The photo on the right side of the magazine is innocent enough, Tony standing in front of Steve, hands clenched in fist. He looked like the superhero he is, even without the Iron Man suit. Steve liked this picture, liked how he could tell Tony was excited and eating up the limelight as always. He kind of wanted to frame it – but he thought better than to tell Pepper that, at least not at this moment.
The photo on the left was a little more suspect. To be fair, Steve had no idea Tony was going to pull his leg up over his shoulder. Of course that was when the flash went off. He could tell Tony had it planned. He looked almost smug in that photo; leg over shoulder, reminiscent of other times - bedroom times. He felt his cheeks redden again.
"Pepper," Tony points to the photo Steve was currently looking at, "I was just displaying Cap's infamous flexibility. The world should know."
"Do you think this is funny?" Pepper demands. "I am not your PR manager Tony Stark and yet, the only thing in my inbox this morning is email after email inquiring about your personal relationship with the one Captain America."
"It probably didn't help that they used that cover," Clint added, unhelpfully, from where he now sat perched on the table next to Phil.
Tony pouted, but Steve could tell it was disingenuous before he even opened his mouth, next quip already lined up. From the look on Pepper's face she could tell as well. "The whole world gets to kiss Captain America's cheek!"
"The whole world is not Tony Stark," Pepper hissed. "The whole world has not been trying to keep their relationship in the closet."
"And why, exactly, are we doing that again?" Tony's hand ran through the hair at the back of Steve's neck.
Pepper opened her mouth, then closed it, then growled again before turning on her heel and out the door.
"At least she left the magazine," Tony huffed, picking up its pages for closer inspection. "We should frame some of these."
"Maybe we should've told her about the article Out Magazine is about to run," Steve admonished.
"And miss the sequel to the Pepper Potts freaks out show?" Clint asked.
Steve put on a Very Disappointed Face. Tony stayed strong for about half a second before groaning. "Okay, okay, I'll call her back in here."