Title: The Final Cylon
Rating: PG
Genre: drunken crack!fic, don't expect much, just for fun. Lol.
Summary: Once upon a time there was young boy from Caprica.
Spoilers: Up through 4x10.
Disclaimer: Just playing with my pilots as always, I do not own.
THE FINAL CYLON
Once upon a time there was young boy from a beautiful city called Caprica.
One day the metal men from outer space came to Caprica City (they apparently had been missing for, like, fifty years) and squished it like a bug. The young boy ran far away from his home when a pretty girl came along with a spaceship and saved the boy from death by toasters (he didn't really get the term since they looked nothing like toasters and toasters were what toasted his morning … toast).
On the girl's spaceship she asked him what his name was and he replied, "Boxey."
Little did he know that she would develop a kinship with him and later give him lots of cookies and potato chips (and he'd get sick, cause that's a lot of junk food).
A long time passed (like a year or more) and we learned that the "toasters" had human faces and all were revealed but one…
… and no one had heard or seen the young boy named Boxey again.
It wasn't until one day when Starbuck kicked the bucket (but not…) and returned to the mother ship after a month or so (but to her, it was like minutes, not confusing at all). Starbuck claimed to know the road to Earth and they set out to find it (and THEY DID).
That was when Starbuck met a young boy from Earth.
"What's your name, kid?" Starbuck asked (not that she really cared, but she had to move the story along, right?).
"Boxey," the boy replied.
Nobody knew who he was – not even Sharon Agathon – cause only Boomer knew him (but she had been Jack Rubied) and Boxey had mysteriously disappeared on, like, day two (or episode two or something). But anyway, Starbuck met the boy and it was finally revealed through a myriad of confusing conversations, speeches, and pilot!sex (and plot lines) that Boxey, the young boy from Caprica who stole Boomer's heart was…
… THE FINAL CYLON.