A/N: Angst stories always come to me randomly. I wonder why?
WARNINGS: Angst, slight OOCness on Sasuke's part, slight SasuNaru (but not really), SPOILERS FOR THE BATTLE AT THE VALLEY OF THE END.
God, he hated smiling. It was so fake and all it did was build up this facade that he knew he would never be able to break down, not after he built it so strong. His friends looked at him and only knew him as the happy-go-lucky kid with the grin that could light up the world, but did they ever notice how quickly the disappeared? Did they ever notice how it never reached his eyes? No, he thought, they don't. He wore one now, one of those plastic smiles that no one ever saw through. They all smiled back, theirs true and real.
Once they had looked away, his smile slipped and his eyes dulled. They all seemed so carefree; so untroubled, and he longed to feel the same. He longed to, for once in his life, be without a target painted so plainly on his back. He wished to be able to walk through the village without getting a look that, were he still a kid, would have sent shivers down his spine and tears down his cheeks. He, just like anyone else, wanted to be normal, but for him, it was impossible.
No one would be able to look passed the scars upon his cheeks that marked him as the vessel for the monster that ripped their village up and took their beloved leader. No one would be able to look through the porcelain mask he had glued to himself to find the agonized person within. Just these thoughts alone made him want to curl up in a corner and cry until it was impossible to shed anymore tears, but he didn't. He kept smiling, kept coming back, and kept saving the village that wished him dead.
When he was younger, his wish had always been to find acceptance among his town, among his family, but as he grew older and Kyuubi's poisonous words tainted his mind, he gave up on that dream, and focused on something much larger, something much greater. He wished to make his father proud. A year ago, on his seventeenth birthday, Tsunade had handed him a scroll, tears falling from her eyes, her stance mournful. He had been concerned, confused, and even a little fearful. Very little hurt Tsunade, so whatever that scroll contained must have been something horrible.
Hands shaking, he had opened the scroll, and his eyes had scanned over it quickly. He had remembered the way his lungs had refused to keep moving and how his heart ceased beating. Tsunade had looked at him with pain filled eyes, and his world stopped. Naruto had dropped the scroll and pushed passed Tsunade, keeping his face down as he sprinted through the village in his desperate need to get away. Tsunade hadn't chased him and he was thankful. He had fled to the forest and climbed the highest tree, and only once he was nestled into its branches, did he scream. It was a lost, agonized sound that he was sure could have been heard even by the Sand Village.
Tears slipped down his cheeks and peppered his leggings, and he watched them, his body numbed with the sorrow of losing his parents a second time. His idol was his father. The Fourth was the father he had begged for while he drew a birthday cake in the sand and blew out the five fake candles. Minato Namikaze was the man he had so desperately craved for when he failed his first graduate exam and curled up in an empty home. His father was the one who had sealed the beast within him and destroyed his future as a normal human being. Naruto had not known what to do. Did he hate his father? No, he had done what he had to. Did he love his father? Maybe. It was hard to love someone he never met, though.
That was the day Naruto had stopped offering real smiles. No one mentioned his red-rimmed eyes or his stuffed up nose, and half of him was glad, while the other just cried harder.
"Oi, Naruto!" Naruto blinked at the hand waving in front of his face. Sakura, her eyebrows furrowed and her aquamarine eyes filled with concern, turned fully to her friend. "Are you okay?"
"Of course, Sakura-chan," Naruto grinned-Why can't you see through it?-and rubbed the back of his neck. Sakura obviously didn't buy it, but said nothing, not wanting to push her friend. Naruto met the eyes of the others in the group: Shikamaru, Choji, and Ino. Shikamaru narrowed his eyes at the blonde and Naruto offered his plastic smile. Shikamaru, you can see through it, right? his mind pleaded wildly, but to his inner despair, his dark haired friend remained silent. The grin slipped and disappeared completely. The group walked through the village, waving to some of the citizens that called out to them. Naruto stayed at the back, eyes on the ground and his shoulders slumped.
"Naruto, are you sure you're okay? You're looking really down," Ino asked him, startling the jinchuuriki. Now's your chance! Tell her!
"I…" the others looked at him expectantly, "I'm...I'm fine! I was just thinking about how good a bowl of ramen would be right now!" Naruto laughed that obnoxious guffaw that he had developed as a kid in order to hide the fact he was, definitely, not okay. Ino, hands on hips, huffed and whirled around, platinum blonde hair swinging elegantly.
"Of course! I should have known! And to think I was worried," she muttered.
"Hey, I'm gonna go get that bowl now. I'll catch up later!" Naruto shouted, turning and taking off down the street before the others could say a thing. Naruto went into autopilot, his feet leading him through the gates of Konoha and into the surrounding forest. His feet pounded against the ground as he sprinted away from civilization, dirt and dust flying up around him. Scrapes littered his cheeks and arms as he shoved aside thorned foliage and got struck by low hanging tree branches. His eyes filled with tears and his movements became sloppy and uncoordinated, causing him to trip numerous times, but he ignored it and focused on getting away. He skidded to a stop at the edge of the forest, his feet dislodging pebbles that rolled off the edge of the cliff he stood on.
The head of the Shodaime Hokage statue at the Valley of the End towered over the land and offered him a view not many got to see. He looked across the extensive water fall and at the statue of Madara Uchiha, his mind blasting him with images of Sasuke, standing proud and tall upon the statue with Orochimaru's Cursed Seal spreading across his body. Sighing, Naruto sat down and looked over the edge and into the lake below him, the water disturbed only by the cascading water. He rubbed his chest as his body remembered the pain of having Sasuke plunge his fist into and through the area, barely missing his heart as they faced off on the exact same lake. The blonde shook away the memories and tried to focus on the sound of the waterfall and the cool breeze that stroked his tear-stained cheeks.
Silently, Naruto willed his heart to calm and for his mind to reach some sort of peace so that he could just close his eyes and sleep.
"Thinking of jumping, dobe?" Naruto whirled around, crouched with his hand hovering over his weapons pouch, lips pulled into a snarl. Sasuke smirked, not even bothering to reach for the katana strapped to the small of his back. The raven's normally obsidian eyes were drenched crimson, the sharingan's pattern painting both orbs. Naruto tried backing up some, but found that there wasn't room to put space between himself and the Uchiha. Sasuke watched his movements, the smirk still in place.
"What do you want, Sasuke?" Naruto growled to his ex-teammate. Sasuke didn't respond, choosing instead to step forward, causing Naruto's foot to slip as he tried to back up on instinct. Unable to do otherwise, the blonde was forced to hold still as the unstable Uchiha moved closer, steps measured and as graceful as they always had been. Naruto's hand brushed over the latch for his kunai pouch, his body tensing. Sasuke stopped, sharingan eyes glittering with amusement.
"Do you really think that will help you against me?" Sasuke asked the blonde. Naruto said nothing, though he knew with only a kunai he might as well be defenceless.
"I still have my jutsus," Naruto shot back. Sasuke scoffed and Naruto knew that even with his jutsus, he was still at a major disadvantage. Sasuke continued his advancement and Naruto's hand shot for his kunai, holding in front of his chest defensively.
"Stop, Sasuke!" Sasuke didn't listen, now only a foot away from the panicking jinchuuriki. Without warning, the raven lunged forward, pushing Naruto forcefully. The blonde was knocked off balance, eyes going wide as he struggled for his balance. His feet fumbled and he was falling, heart stopping as his body hurtled downward. Naruto squeezed his eyes shut and his arm was wrenched painfully upward, halting his descent. Cautiously, the shinobi opened his eyes and looked up at the smirking face of Sasuke Uchiha, who layed on his stomach with one arm stretched over the edge of the statue, hand clutching Naruto's. Heart racing with adrenaline, Naruto glared up at the other man and shouted, "Sasuke-teme! What the hell?"
Sasuke just raised a brow.
"That's a much different mood than that pathetic one from before," the raven noted.
"It wasn't pathetic! It was-" Naruto fell abruptly silent, looking away from those soul-seeing scarlet eyes.
"Then what was it, usuratonkachi?"
"Don't call me that, teme!" Naruto snapped, purposely ignoring the question. Sasuke's hand loosened and he let go of Naruto all together, causing the other to gasp. Before Naruto could blink, Sasuke had a firm grip on him again.
"Stop doing that!"
"I will when you stop avoiding my questions," Sasuke retorted, loosening his hold again. Naruto cried out and grabbed Sasuke's arm with his other hand, eyes squeezed shut. They slowly opened and Sasuke snorted, earning another glare from the blonde.
"Get me up," Naruto ordered.
"Not yet," Sasuke said. Naruto growled up at him and the older ignored him. "Why are you here?"
"Why does it matter? Is it illegal now, oh great Sasuke-kun?" Naruto mocked. Sasuke's eyes narrowed and his grip slacked. Naruto choked and clutched tighter to the limb.
"Are you done?" Sasuke demanded and Naruto numbly nodded, heart thumping wildly. "Why are you here and not with the other idiots?"
"They aren't idiots," Naruto argued weakly.
"Dobe," Sasuke warned.
"Okay, okay! I...wanted to get away for a while; think," Naruto told the raven grudgingly.
"You think?" Sasuke smirked when Naruto glared at him.
"Shut up, teme!"
"What could you possibly be thinking about?" Sasuke derided. Naruto, ignoring the jab, adverted his eyes. Sasuke squeezed his hand warningly and Naruto scowled.
"Why do you care," he finally asked, refusing to look up at the raven.
"I don't. I'm curious as to what could be so important that it makes the dobe think."
"Teme!"
"Answer the question," Sasuke ordered. Naruto looked into those menacing eyes and stared. Maybe he was trying to find answers? Maybe he was just trying to annoy the hell out of Naruto? Both? Sasuke just stared back, waiting for Naruto to say something. The jinchuuriki remained silent, searching those eyes.
"Dobe, what are you-" he stopped once he realized Naruto had begun to shake.
Why am I so nervous? Naruto asked himself, unable to break eye contact with Sasuke.
Do you really not know, gaki? a deep, rough voice snorted inside his head.
Kyuubi? What are you talking about?
Think about it, idiot. Naruto stared at Sasuke, who met his gaze evenly. A memory slammed into his head and his eyes widened. It was of him and Sasuke, back when they were both part of team seven and were on the mission to the Wave Country. Kakashi had just explained to them the idea of focusing chakra to their feet in order to climb or stand on surfaces they normally wouldn't have been able to do so on. That was the first time Sasuke had been evenly matched with Naruto on a skill, so, naturally, they had turned it into a competition. At the end of the day, they were both exhausted, but satisfied with their work. He remembered the feeling of being proud that he was actually equal to Sasuke in something.
The memory still filled him with pride, but that wasn't why it appeared to him now. All this time, I was pleading for someone to look through the mask and actually see me, and I had that person with me all along. Naruto looked up at Sasuke, who remained silent and waiting.
Naruto tugged on their joined hands.
"Help me up, teme," he ordered.
"Why should I? You still haven't answered my question," Sasuke scoffed.
"Shut up and just help me. I'll answer when you get me up there," Naruto growled, pulling on the hand again. Sasuke rolled his eyes and heaved, pulling Naruto up and back onto the head of the statue. "Well?" Sasuke demanded once they had both settled across from each other.
"I was thinking about how…." Naruto hesitated, "fake I feel around the others." Sasuke snorted, and before Naruto could yell at him, the raven said something that made Naruto's eyes go wide.
"It took you this long to actually realize that?"
"What the hell are you talking about, teme?" Naruto hissed. Sasuke looked him in the eye and said simply, "It's so obvious how fake you really are."
"And how would you know that?" Naruto demanded. Sasuke rolled his eyes.
"Like I said, dobe, it's obvious," Sasuke pointed to Naruto's eyes, "You're 'smiles' never reach your eyes, you're shoulders were always slumped, that laugh was so disgustingly fake that even a deaf man could tell, and did you seriously think that I wouldn't notice that the moment Sakura or Kakashi turned around, you're idiotic grin disappeared?"
Naruto sat, stunned into silence. How had Sasuke noticed all of that?
"Like I said, it's obvious," Sasuke responded, reading Naruto's mind. Silence passed between the two and then Naruto blew up.
"And it never occurred to you to say something?" Naruto demanded, eyes alight with fury as he pushed himself into Sasuke's personal space.
"It was waste of breath to say anything, usuratonkachi," Sasuke glared. Naruto pounced, aiming his fist for Sasuke's face, but the raven rolled, throwing off his balance for the second time that day. They struggled until Sasuke had Naruto pinned, ending the fight with a punch to the blonde's shoulder. Naruto glared at him and huffed.
"So why are you here, teme?" Naruto asked, wishing he could rub his bruising shoulder.
"Why should I answer that?"
"Because I could easily knee your crotch before you could stop me," Naruto responded with smirk. Sasuke glared down at the jinchuuriki and shifted ever so subtly.
"Why does it matter?"
"It doesn't. I was just wondering what would bring the great Uchiha prodigy all the way back here," Naruto mocked their earlier conversation. Noticing this, Sasuke rolled his eyes again, and responded lazily, "It was a whim."
"It's always whim-this, whim-that, with you," Naruto huffed. Sasuke snorted and climbed off the blonde, standing straight and turning his back to the other.
"Where are you going?" Naruto wondered, not bothering to stand.
"Wherever Itachi is. Orochimaru is dead now, so there's nothing holding me back now," Sasuke responded, stepping toward the forest. Naruto's eyes lowered and he sighed.
"Funny that's pretty similar to what you said last time we were here," he muttered, too low for Sasuke to hear. Naruto watched the Uchiha's retreating back and hesitated, before yelling out, "Why didn't you kill me?"
"What's the point of killing a man who wants to die already?" Sasuke shouted back.
"I didn't want to die," Naruto protested.
"Then what were you doing?" Sasuke challenged, not bothering to stop or look back. Naruto smirked and yelled back, "Waiting for someone to look through the mask!" Sasuke's step hesitated and he turned.
"What are you talking about, dobe?" Naruto ignored the question and stood, grinning the first real smile in years.
"Nothing. Just thinking out loud," he responded, walking passed Sasuke and into the woods.
"Dobe," Sasuke muttered.
A/N: So, what do you think? Yeah, I know Sasuke was OOC, but I warned you.
Reviews are appreciated and smothered with love! I hope you all enjoyed this one-shot and I will see you in the next story! BYE :D