Unsettled

Sara had never felt more convicted and more narrow minded in a long time; Grissom had brought that about in her, and it wasn't a good feeling. It was that stabbing, twitching, crumpling feeling that attacked her heart, and her stomach. Why had he stirred up such emotion inside of her? She was supposed to be the dead sure, no holds, Sara Sidle, and after dealing with the outcome of dealing with Grissom's supposed arson case (it turned out that Grissom's anger with Ecklie lead to a break in the case) that really was just a tragic turn of events was that much harder because it was Grissom who was making her put herself on the chopping block for her assumptions.

She wasn't sure that Warrick felt the same way, but she really didn't care at the moment. Especially not after investigating him twice. Even though the second time proved him to have a good heart, the old phrase, "the road to Hell is paved with good intentions" came into her mind. His nobility being the road, and Sara being the hell that awaited him anytime he crossed paths with her even on a good day.

Now, after Grissom grilling both of them for not taking his arson case seriously and treating it with the utmost care like the man wasn't in prison just added to the weight of the question that had been nagging her and digging under her skin for months.

Why was she always the one feeling the blows delivered, and why was she feeling them so hard? But that wasn't the question on her mind, and her thoughts ceased for a moment when she heard heavy, tentative footsteps coming toward her in the small dual-use office that was in desperate need of dusting and reorganizing.

Sara knew who it was and she didn't want to look up at him because for one, he was just too damn sexy with his stature and body that complimented it, and two, because his eyes would do all the talking for him, and both of those factors were enough to confuse her and make her feel like she was on a pendulum, complicating her feelings for Grissom, and making her rebuild the "thirty feet thick steel wall with barbed wire fences complete with rabid German shepherds and Bouncing Bettys", those being the exact words of Ecklie upon his hearing of her I-don't-take-BS-from-anybody personality. But that wasn't her, and it wasn't what she wanted to be; but with Warrick sitting in the chair across the outdated desk from her, she was slowly but surely becoming that person.

"I can always tell that something's bothering you," he started quietly.

"I just want to be alone right now," she said, still looking down at her folded hands which were cold and numb. "Besides, you can't possibly tell. We don't even give each other the time of day."

"Sara, I've been around you long enough, I guess I should say," he corrected. "To know that something's bothering you."

"Semantics," she said in a hoarse voice.

Warrick sighed a frustrated breath, the breath that she'd heard on many occasions when he was upset at her, or at the details of a case.

"Look, I want us to be able to work together," he said. "I don't want you to tear yourself out of the picture like you always do. I don't know what they do in San Francisco, but out here, we're a team and we're friends."

Sara looked up at him and it was then that he saw the warmth in her chocolate brown eyes for the first time, and the blush in her alabaster face, not really sure if it was anger or embarrassment that caused the redness.

He'd never given her this much scrutiny before; she hadn't given him a reason to, but now, there was a certain vulnerability that had emerged from within the guarded Sara that was simply beautiful.

"You haven't given me a reason to be your friend," she said quietly, softly, yet the words still stung both of them.

"I know, and I'm sorry," Warrick said, knowing that it wasn't going to be enough.

"Can I trust you?" She asked. "Not just with my life, but with my feelings as well?"

Warrick considered the question. By feelings, he didn't know what she meant, but as far as with her life, he thought he was prepared to answer yes, but he thought about what happened with Holly, and the answer suddenly became blurry. But it was the way she worded the question: "not just with my life, but with my feelings".

"Do you already trust me with your life?" Warrick asked.

"Yeah," she said truthfully. "But I want to know that I can be myself around you."

Sara was surprised at her unbridled emotions. Warrick had this aura about him that made her want to talk about all that she was feeling and cry the tears that had loomed in her eyes for so long.

She found that he still had not answered him, but instead he came over to her and he made his answer clear with a hug. Sara stiffened at the action-reflexive. When he didn't pull back, she relaxed and hugged him tighter, the numbness from her hands and her heart gone.