AN: This may not be very good but I just had the idea and thought it would be OK. So this is a bit of a diversion. New chap of Op. ANDERSON up soon. Nigel speaks like this. Lizzie speaks like this. And the radio and song speak like "this." Got it?

Rated K-Plus for mild sex references.

Disclaimer: I don't own KND or the characters. Nor do I own the Arctic Monkeys, Fluorescent Adolescent or the lyrics. They'd probably be pretty mad and send the clowns after me!!

Saturday. Me. Here. Alone. Crying. Being dumped is a new… altogether depressing experience. I started off wanting to BE the dumper but then, the feelings grew and got in the way. Then I started to care for her. Obviously, she stopped caring and then dumped me unexpectedly. I wish she still cared about me. Oh Lizzie.

Saturday. Me. Here. Alone. Contemplating. So this is how it feels to be the dumper. Somehow I thought it would be a lovely experience, you know, be free and all that. Instead it's the most sickening feeling I've ever had. I feel kind of hard on Nigel. Letting him go so out of the blue. Just when he actually started to like me. I wonder if the radio can help.

I wonder if the radio can help.

"You're listening to Emotion 98.3."

No. No.

"This is V-Rock."

Na. No way.

"This is Radio…"

NO!!! NO!!!

"You're tuned to LAUNCHcast Radio and Nigel & Lizzie's station."

That's better. A lot better

"Now it's the Arctic Monkeys and Fluorescent Adolescent."

Oh no. I've had a lot of bad times with this song.

Crap. Even though I like this song it always makes me rethink my current position.

Oh well, better than the rubbish on the other stations.

"You used to get it in your fishnets
Now you only get it in your night dress,"

(Yeah, those were some lovely nights.

Oh god those were nice.)
"Discarded all the naughty nights for niceness
Landed in a very common crisis,"

(Common is a word I'm not used to. Not sure if everyone else is.

Yeah, it's happened before.)
"Everything's in order in a black hole
Nothing seems as pretty as the past though
That Bloody Mary's lacking a Tabasco
Remember when he used to be a rascal?"

(Yeah.

Loved him that way.)

"Oh that boy's a slag."

(Might be.

God he ain't.)
"The best you ever had
The best you ever had
Is just a memory and those dreams
Not as daft as they seem,"

(Sadly they are.

You know what? They aren't!)
"Not as daft as they seem
My love when you dream them up..."

(Maybe they aren't. I know Lizzie's aren't.)

"Flicking through a little book of sex tips
Remember when the boys were all electric?"

(Wait. What? That I don't get.

Oh the helmet thing. Ah! Guilt.)
"Now when she tells she's gonna get it
I'm guessing that she'd rather just forget it,"

(Maybe she does want to forget it.

I don't want to.)
"Clinging to not getting sentimental
Said she wasn't going but she went still
Likes her gentlemen to not be gentle,"

(I'm no gentile giant but I'm no Attila the Hun either.

Nigel was just right if you ask me.)
"Was it a Mecca Dobber or a betting pencil?

Oh that boy's a slag
The best you ever had
The best you ever had
Is just a memory and those dreams
Weren't as daft as they seem
Not as daft as they seem
My love when you dream them up
Oh, where did you go?
Where did you go?"

(Where did you go, Lizzie?

Oh Nigie! (blub))
"Where did you go? Whoa.

Falling about
You took a left off Last Laugh Lane"

(That part's right.

Oh god! Stop with the guilt!)
"You were just sounding it out
You're not coming back again."

(Say it ain't so. Please come back!

Oh please stop!!)

"Falling about
You took a left off Last Laugh Lane
You were just sounding it out
You're not coming back again."

(Oh come back Lizzie! I'm sorry.

Nigel!!!)

"You used to get it in your fishnets
Now you only get it in your night dress
Started all the naughty nights with niceness"

(Indeed we did…

Got that… oh Nigel!)
"Landed in a very common crisis
Everything's in order in a black hole
Everything was pretty in the past though
That Bloody Mary's lacking in Tabasco
Remember when he used to be a rascal?"

"That was…"

Oh Lizzie…

Oh Nigel…

Well that's that. Reviews would be nice. But not flames. Flames would make me sad!