Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters – but it's nice to take them out of the box and play with them!
A/N: This was inspired by a conversation at work about security of the key to a key cabinet. Remembering it, I had one of those MASH moments where you go off at a complete tangent, and you can just picture the scene and hear the characters. Anyway, this wrote itself in about ten minutes.
Key Moment
The meeting seemed to have been going on for hours, with meaningless reports and endless bureaucracy from distant generals who seemed to know very little about how a MASH unit was actually run. Colonel Potter glanced round at his distracted, fidgeting team. He was amazed they had been able to control themselves for this long.
"Okay, last item. There have been a couple of nasty incidents in recent weeks at other units, and I've been reminded by Headquarters that we must keep the key to the gun cabinet in a locked cupboard."
"We have to keep a key under lock and key?" asked Charles innocently, absolutely aware of what he was probably starting.
"Where would we keep the key for the locked cabinet where we keep the key for the gun cabinet?" Hawkeye Pierce's eyes began to twinkle as he realised the potential in this topic.
What have I started? thought Potter. "Hold on now, people….."
"The best way to keep a key safe is to swallow it," suggested Radar. Everyone looked at him in silence. "It's true! I saw it in a movie!"
"I've got it! We should get a duplicate," BJ joined in enthusiastically. "Then we could lock the real key in the gun cabinet, and use the duplicate to unlock the cabinet to get at the key for the cabinet."
Margaret looked confused. "This is beginning to sound like one of those dolls you open up and inside there's a whole load of smaller dolls."
"Actually, this is beginning to sound like Pandora's box," said Hawkeye. "Who wants to be able to open the gun cabinet in the first place? I don't like the thought of what happens when all that stuff gets loose."
"Ah – but when all the evils of the world were released, Hope remained in Pandora's box,", offered Father Mulcahy, silent up until now.
Pause.
"Well, I guess that ends that conversation", said Potter, raising his coffee mug. "Nice last word, Father. I'll let you know about the key, folks. Thanks for your inattention."
The End