**Specific Mice Disclaimer**
Mice is in no way associated with the Marvel Comics Group. She is merely trying to write a story and this is all she has to show for it. A noble effort. Though she would one day like to be paid for writing, please don't send her any money (send mail to urmonkeyifudo on instructions to send her money). The characters of Bobby Drake, Hank McCoy and Jubilee, belong to the Marvel Comics Group. Holland, Jacob, Bert, Cliff, Hollis, Annie, Gary, and Nan are of my own mind. Tiki Curse has been revoked. If you want to e-mail her comments, do so at her gmail account. You know the one - it hasn't changed and it's our nickname for Hank that I appropriated. You'll get some apple pie cookies out of the deal, which is a terrific deal because she is a fabulous cook. If you understood this, I miss you. If you did not, just know that I am in no way associated with Marvel Comics and have original characters in here.
For the Children
By Mice
-Part 1: Murder, Mystery, Machine-
December 23rd
-1-
"I don't get it."
"What don't you get?"
"Why does this card say "Happy Holidays"?"
"...because there's a lot of holidays."
"Which one should I be happiest for?"
"Which one do you like the best?"
"I don't know."
"You don't know?"
"I've only celebrated two of each. Is that enough to get an informed opinion?"
"...yes...!"
"Well...I liked the one where we scared the children."
"Halloween?"
"No, the other one."
"Oh! Memorial Day!"
"Yes. We scared children and ate hamburgers. I enjoyed that one."
"You realize that's not part of the holidays that the card is referring to, right?"
"I was afraid of that. I need to think. Which holiday is your favorite?"
"Christmas Eve."
"Are you sure?"
"I am positive."
"What is so special about the Eve?"
"Just...you wouldn't understand, Drake'son."
"Do we get to scare more children?"
"Only if we're doing it wrong."
"Kwanzaa."
"What?"
"I like Kwanzaa best. Because there's a Z in it."
"You like Kwanzaa because it has something in common with Liza Minnelli?"
"Who?"
"Forget it. You alternate reality X-Men suck with your lack of pop culture. When are you going to let me teach you about the superficial world out there?"
"Soon, Jubilation. Soon."
-2-
"Hey...it's me. I guess you're still not picking up. I understand because of all of the...all of the. Uhm...I'm still going to keep trying, okay? I guess because you're not telling me not to keep calling you it's okay. And it's not like I call as much as I used to. Twice a year. That's it. Uhm...please call me back. I'm...still really sorry. I was stupid and I just...I just miss you, okay? I just miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you.
"In case you don't remember who this is...it's -"
SORRY - YOUR VOICEMAIL WAS NOT RECORDED. PRESS "1" IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO CONTINUE-
-3-
"Annie!"
Little hairs stood up on her neck as Annie turned around. "Hank."
He put his arms around her. "I hear congratulations are in order."
"It's just marriage - people do it every day. It's not like getting invited to a murder mystery party."
"Annie...nobody has had the decency to tell you how absolutely dreadful these parties are."
"Five years ago, I was waiting tables in Wyoming engaged to a bad choice. Today, I'm engaged to an Irishman and am attending Matt Murdoch's annual murder mystery. Dreadful? You have no idea what dreadful is."
"Excuse me." Reed Richards snaked his had through Annie and Hank to grab a mug of hot booze.
"Starting early, Reed?"
"And often. One of us can turn invisible during this holiday drudgery. One of us...one of us is not driving home."
"Hello, Dr. Richards! I'm Annie-" Annie gave a small wave of her hand.
"Miss Peckenpaugh, I know who you are and it's an honor to meet you - Sue! There's someone I want you to meet."
"I'm talking to Matt, darling. I'm getting our roles."
Reed groaned and leaned in close to Annie and Hank. "I hope I get to be the first victim again. I got shot in the parlor, and immediately after they found my body and left the room, I came back here for more hot chocohol."
"Let's face it, Reed - the hot chocohol is the only reason we keep coming back."
"What is so bad about these parties? I couldn't wait to be here!"
"Annie," Reed sighed. "You're new to this circle. You haven't heard the same old stories that are told every year -"
"Seriously, every year, Annie!" Hank chimed in.
"And you would think with the caliber of people in attendance with the scope of solving real, trans-dimensional mysteries, it would not be as corny and hokey as it is!"
"Corny?" Annie asked as Sue Richards returned with sheets of paper and props.
"Okay, so I am the exotic Dutchess Jessica Vanderbell from the country of...Hollandia. I am very wealthy and recently a widow. I am a suspect because people believe I murdered my elderly husband, Duke Jessup Vanderbell. I get to wear this - " she held up a massive black veil, " - and according to my sheet, it's strongly encouraged I speak with an accent."
"Who am I?"
"You, Reed, are Minh, the Chinese delivery boy. You get to wear this -" she held up a red windbreaker that said Wok 'n' Roll Fantasy with a white silk screened dragon playing a guitar, " - and it is strongly encouraged that you do not speak with an accent." She handed him an envelope.
"What's this?"
"Your assignment as victim or murderer or observer." Reed went to open it and Sue slapped his hand.
"OW!"
"Matt said you couldn't do that again." Sue turned to Hank and gave his cheek a kiss and hugged him and then took Annie's hand to shake. "Hank, I've missed you. Annie, it is a pleasure to meet you. Reed raves about your programming skills. He has an engineering crush on you."
Annie blushed. "That's sweet to say -"
"No, I do. In fact, it's rumored that your script for the Shi'Ar defense shield in sub-tropical climates is going to make the calendar this year."
"Calendar?"
Reed nearly choked on his hot chocohol. "You haven't heard of the calendar? Hank?"
"Reed, she's going to make the calendar?" Hank beamed.
"What calendar?"
Sue rolled her eyes. "The annual Stark-Gates Calendar of Scientific Achievement. They post all the hottest achievements in the world in there. You know. Like one of those calendars you see in mechanic shops but instead of hot girls...hot science stuff."
Annie turned to Hank. "My script is going to be a pin up?"
"I couldn't be prouder."
Jennifer Walters, eyes half on her iPhone, half on a waiter, approached the group. "Hot Chocohol me, Reed. Can this start, already? I have a motion going in for summary judgment on the 27th and a secretary having emotional problems.
-3-
"So they just replay this movie for the duration of a day?"
"This one and "It's a Wonderful Life". Here." Jubilee handed him a large mug seemingly covered in whipped cream.
Drake'son smiled and took the mug. "That one I am familiar with."
"How does your dimension have that movie?"
"There is much our realities share and other bits that get...muddied."
"Like what?" Jubilee asked while liking the sticky cream off of her hands.
Drake'son paused. "Well...as well as holding a term as President of the United States of America, Lou Reed is also the most famous rock star of all time."
"What, no Duran Duran?"
"They were what you would call an indie band. Very few songs survived the Great Reckoning."
"That has got to get so confusing."
Drake'son nodded and looked at the envelope from the card again. "Things here are so similar and so different."
"Stop looking at it! Were you two like a big thing or something over there?"
Drake'son hung his head. "It is obvious."
"Jesus, Drake, I'm sorry."
"We were a..."big thing". Over there."
"What happened?"
"She died. Sentinel attack."
"I'm sorry."
"She was a brave woman. I thought I came to terms with her death, but then I found myself here and she's here, but there's no us here."
Jubilee made a face of the guilty. "Well...there is. This world you and her hooked up. It was not a good match."
"We broke up once. We fought over who should lead patrol - she said that I was letting responsibility to take over my life. I kept explaining to her that since Scott died, somebody needed to be a leader. Were they fights like that?"
"Uhm...you guys broke up because you fucked an underaged me and she was so and totally obviously in love with Hank even though his ex-girlfriend was stalking his ex-girlfriends and murdered and tortured them in weird, graphic, gynecological ways."
"...well, that's different." Drake'son began to drink his mug. "What is in this?"
"Booze and cinnamon."
"It reminds me of a drink I used to make. A Long Island Molotov Holiday. Took a bit of my parent's booze, heated it up, added cinnamon."
"Well, there's something you and he have in common! I got this recipe from him!"
"Then that's one of the very few things we have in common." He took another drink. "He took advantage of you?"
"I made myself readily available. I had, like, this weird crush on him. Then I dated his cousin. Then a cheerleader - I had this gay phase. So did his cousin! I was more successful, though - he went after Hank. Stupid boy." Jubilee rolled her eyes before blushing.
"No need to be embarrassed. We all do foolish things."
"I dyed my hair blond."
"I once had a uniform that was nothing but a pair of underwear, essentially."
"I hate to tell you that you had that here."
"How can I be so...unaware...in multiple universes?"
"That is the magic of being Bobby Drake."
"Do you think that other alternate me's have done that?"
"I am pretty sure. "
"Has this Robert ever -"
"Look. Drake'son. If you want to see my photo album, all you had to do was ask."
-6-
"...and then I said, "Lawyer? I hardly even know her!" Oh, that was a bad one. A bad joke told to me by the wonderful Jennifer Walters."
Jennifer leaned over to Hank and whispered, "Liar."
Annie leaned over. "Won't he hear you with the super power hearing?"
Jennifer smirked and shook her head. "Matt's head is full of being the center of attention right now. One year, Reed and I had a drinking game for each time he said, "My good friend, Daredevil" - as if we all don't know he's Daredevil! - and were so trashed we began riffing. He never stopped. Even after Reed threw a bottle at an imaginary cat."
Hank perked up. "Oh! The year Clint brought absinthe!"
"And now - without further delay - let the annual Matt Murdoch Murder Mystery begin!"