"Isabella Swan" the nurse called out. I rushed to get out of my seat, and wipe my eyes so I could see properly. This was it; this is what I have been waiting to find out. I have been sitting in this cold, musty room for several hours, pacing, sitting, and thinking. This is not the way it ends; I am not ready for this to be over.
The nurse walked ahead, and I assumed this meant to follow her, I wanted to scream, I wanted to run, I wanted to jump up and down and ask what was happening! It was the first time in a long time that I was feeling real emotion. My heart was pounding, my palms were sweaty and it was the first time, in a long time that I just needed him.
Sitting in the cold stark waiting room, the room the nurse delivered me to was… intense? The walls were plain, and the paint was wearing with age, I thought about all the people who sat in this room waiting to find out about their loved ones, all the tragedy, all the joy and happiness that was brought to people over the years in this room.
Charlie. I had gotten a call at 2AM, Charlie was in the hospital. My quiet, loving, caring father had a heart attack and required surgery. There was no time for me to see him prior to going into surgery, and I was told to make it to the hospital as soon as possible. Waiting for information is agony, I need my father, I need to tell him I love him, I need to tell him I am sorry, I need him to forgive me for the stress I caused him. I needed my daddy.
I felt completely alone, Renee and Phil were traveling and I was unable to reach them. However, maybe that was for the best? I am not sure Charlie would want his ex-wife whom he still loved and her husband with him while he was recovering. I was his family, I was his daughter, and this was my duty. I would take care of my father no matter what. He took care of me when Edward left, and it is my turn to repay the favor. It is my turn to be the grownup.
Thinking of Edward sends shivers up my spine, to this day I try not say his name. I actually try hard not to think of any of the Cullen family. They are gone, they didn't want me, and they didn't need me. I am a different person; I am not the shy girl who was hopelessly in love with their broodingly beautiful son. Edward is beautiful, his features are defined. I could get lost in his golden eyes, his disheveled hair that just begged to have my fingers run through it. But he left me three years ago and he is not coming back. And I will live with that pain for the rest of my life, regardless of how hard I try to hide it.
I have not been back to Forks in three years, after I graduated high school I hightailed it out of this town, much to Charlie's displeasure. But how could I stay? The only thing that this town reminded me of was Edward and Alice and the entire Cullen clan. I love Charlie really and truly but Forks only held pain for me. Being in Forks brings back so many memories, stirs up so many old feelings, and makes me feel things I wish would get locked away in my subconscious forever.
But today, today things were different. Charlie needed me, I needed to be here for him, to champion through this with him. This was about my dad, not my previous relationship. Forks may stir up painful memories, but I had to push past them and be here for Charlie. This was about Charlie.
What felt like days later a doctor emerged, he still had his scrubs on and held a large folder, a folder which I assumed held information on my father, I desperately wanted to rip it from his hands and find the answers I needed.
"Isabella Swan?"
"Yes, I am Isabella, I prefer Bella, can you tell me about my father please?"
"Yes Bella, I am Dr. Marlow and I was here when your father was brought in, and operated on him this evening" He held out hand to me and gestured that I sit down. I truly just wanted to know what was going on, I didn't need to be sitting, I just needed answers.
"Bella, I am going to be honest with you the surgery did not go as well as we would have liked. Your father had a massive heart attack and required immediate open heart surgery; he was down quite some time before he was found at his house. He was lucky he was brought in when he was"
Pain, fear and confusion shot through me? Charlie was alone when he had a heart attack, he had to wait until someone found him to get the medical attention he needed. Charlie could still be in our house at Forks, if someone had not stumbled upon him. But who was it? Where are they?
"Bella, we are trying everything we can, however your father suffered a stroke while we were in the midst of the operation and is currently in recovery, but will be transferred to ICU"
"Can I see him? I need to see him"
"He will be in recovery for some time, and he needs to rest, visiting hours are over, I am sorry Bella but you will need to come back tomorrow. Go home, get some rest and we will go over everything with you tomorrow when we have more information"
And with that the Dr. left the room, not giving me the chance to speak. I stayed in the room for a few more moments before collecting my belongings and walking out of the hospital and getting in my car. This was the first time I would be in the house for 3 years. And as concerned as I was for Charlie I was petrified to go back in that house, and feel the rush of emotion I knew would hit as soon as I entered. Once I made it into the car, I turned on my cell phone, I am sure I had missed some calls, and I am sure people were worried, I left so abruptly, I knew my friends were probably shaken by my sudden departure.
As expected, I had 7 missed calls and handful of texts and 5 voice messages, delaying the inevitable of having to go home, I decided now was good a time as any to make the needed calls. The first message was from Angela, my best friend; she had received my message and was devastated. The next message was from Chad; Chad was a nervous wreck and wanted me to call him as soon as possible. Once I heard all of the messages – they were all from Chad; I looked at the time and hit send on my phone.
Chad picked up on the first ring. "Bella. Baby, is that you? Are you alright"?
"Hi Chad, yes it is me, and I am as well as can be expected"
"Did you find anything out about Charlie? Do you need me to come there? I can be there in less that 24hrs, just tell me and I will drop everything"
As sweet as Chad was for offering I needed to do this alone. "No, Chad, thank you for offering, and I really do appreciate it, but I have to take care of this and I will call you as soon as I get more information"
I don't know why I didn't want Chad to come, this was my home and he was my boyfriend. I should want him to come and take care of me, to love me, to make me feel better. But Forks held to many powerful memories, and I just don't think the two would mix well at least not right now. Also, Chad knew nothing about Edward, or any of the Cullen's. All he knew was I had loved deeply and lost deeply.
"Baby, I don't know if it is a good idea, you being there alone. I would feel a lot better if I was with you."
"Chad, I know but it is late and I am tired and drained, and I don't have all the info on Charlie, and I won't get it until tomorrow. I will call you back then and we can discuss it further ok?"
Chad was hesitant, but finally replied "…OK, but I don't like it, and I want you to call me as soon as you have more information Bella. I miss you and I love you"
"I miss you to Chad, Goodnight"
I couldn't tell Chad I loved him, we have been dating almost a year, but I still could not say those three words. He understood, he said he would wait for me. I am not sure why, he could have anybody, I don't understand why he would want someone as emotionally deranged as I. I met Chad at a bar about 18 months ago; Angela and I were celebrating her promotion at work. She was a Marketing manager for a Power Supply company and just got a good raise! We were both living in New York City, and I was working at Random House as a Jr. Editor, as well as finishing up my degree at NYU.
Chad was at the bar with some of his colleagues, and we all just hit it off. We exchanged email addresses and talked throughout the next few weeks. Eventually Angela and I started hanging out with Chad and his friends socially, Angela started dating his best friend Andrew. I was hesitant though, and one night I got intoxicated and told Chad about Edward. Well sort of. I told him I loved a man for 2 years, and that I thought he was my soul mate, but then one day he and his family left.
Chad is a smart man, and he knows there is more to the story, but to this day has never pried for more details. He knows all of this happened in Forks, maybe that's why he wants to come here so much? Chad and I began dating casually and now we have been exclusive for about a year.
Chad is a good man. He is kind, he is loving, and he is honest. Chad deserves my whole heart, not just a piece of it.
Pulling up to my house in Fork was surreal, it looks exactly the same way I left it three years ago. It looked like nothing had changed, when it actuality things were completely different.
Once I opened the door and stepped inside a rush of emotions came back to me so forcefully that I fell to my knees. I remembered everything, everything that had happened, all the reasons that I left in the first place. The house looked exactly as I left in three years ago. There were no changes, the same furniture, the same dishes, the same appliances. There was a chill in the house, just like there always was when I was here before. I always associated this chill to Edward and Alice, their cold bodies made my house cold!
I know that really was not the case, but at the time that was the best I could come up with. I was exhausted and as much as I hated to this to myself, I walked upstairs to my childhood bedroom. I knew going into this room would stir up more emotion then I was ready to handle. However, I was hoping I would be too tired to notice it.
The same theme existed in my bedroom, Charlie never changed a thing, I think even the bedding was the same. I dropped my luggage on the floor and headed to the bathroom to change and clean up. I was hoping to pass out as soon as my head hit the pillow.
When I returned to my bedroom I stood frozen at the foot of my bed. The window was wide open and laying on my bed was one single red rose with a paper draped around simply reading "Bella"
I would recognize that handwriting from anywhere, I was in shock, and the only thing I could think to do was run to my window, slam it shut and lock it. I was not ready to deal with him.
A/N: So what d you think? I have the whole story outlined, I know this is short, the rest of the chapters are much longer. I just wanted some feedback to see if I should continue or not? Also I need a BETA, anyone interested? Thanks so much for reading!