Hey I just had the craziest impulse to start a new story!! haha I've had this idea in my head for like a year and I finally feel like I am capable of putting it out there for you all to read. It's the story of Lucas and Nathan's little sister Allie. They don't know she exists, but one day she shows up and the brings with her some troubling memories and emotional baggage. It might be a little confusing at first, because it's all in her POV so at this point she doesn't know she even has brothers. Anyway I really hope you all like it. It's going to concentrate on her and her relationships with Nathan and Lucas. I still haven't decided on the couples yet so I'm always open to suggestions or preferences. So here's the first chapter please bear with me I've never written anything that didn't revolve around a couple lol
It's 6 A.M. on saturday. What the hell is wrong with me? No one gets up this early on a Saturday. Maybe someone who didn't stay up all night would be capable of sleeping in past 6 A.M. You know what they say sleep is overrated anyway. I've suffered from insomnia for as long as I can remember. Taking pills never did anything for me I always thought if I was meant to get a peaceful night sleep then it would just happen. Of course maybe it wasn't so much the insomnia preventing me from the deep sleep I so desperately needed. No I'm pretty sure it was the noise of the 13 year old bitch who was fucking her boyfriend for what seemed like the millionth time since last night. Yeah those two don't stop for anything. Maybe it was the fact that these walls were so damn thin that I could hear everything from both rooms on each side of me.
Maybe it was the fact that this was the 79th night in a row I hadn't slept even for a second. I couldn't blame it all on the horny preteens in the room next door. The 17 year old twin girls on the other side spend most of their nights screaming at each other anyway. They fight over everything it's pretty ridiculous. I wish I had a sister or brother. My chest tightened thinking about that. I'd be so happy with either one. Having someone to listen to you and be there for you unconditionally and no matter what they'll always love you. Obviously all siblings weren't like that. Hell maybe none of them were. My chest tightened again at that thought. I pulled out my ipod and blasted 'Diary of Jane' by Breaking Benjamin. It drowned out all the noise of everyone in this pathetic shit hole excuse of a place to live. Then again it was a foster home and those weren't exactly meant to like the four seasons.
I sighed and pulled the blankets over my head trying to concentrate on the lyrics of one of my favorite songs.
If I had to
I would put myself right beside you
So let me ask
Would you like that
Would you like that
I'm only 16 years old and already I'm an orphan. I guess technically I'm not a real orphan since it was my adoptive parents who died, but still. I don't know my real parents. I was adopted pretty much the second I was born so it's very clear my real mom and dad didn't want to even deal with me for more than they needed to. I grew up living in the penthouse of the most luxurious apartment complex in Charlotte. It was by far the richest city in North Carolina. My father was the most successful lawyer on the east coast possibly country and my mother was a famous model who traveled to New York a lot. Trajecally on the way to the airport so they could go spend the month in the mansion in Paris they got into a car accident and they both died as well as Edward our family limo driver. I really miss Edward he taught me how to drive when I was 12. I was a little impatient and didn't want to wait until I was 16, and I spent way more time with him than my own parents. He helped me with my homework when my nanny wasn't doing her job and I always considered him a close friend.
The minute I got the news about the accident the police sent me here to the Charlotte foster homes. Original name right? I fortunately received my own room, but it wouldn't have mattered since I always know what everyone else on this floor is doing because I can hear it all happening. We might as well be roommates. I groaned in frustration at the whole situation. And isn't it bad when you get the news of your parents demise and you don't even shead a tear? Well I don't know, but I sure as hell didn't.
And I don't mind
If you say this love is the last tim
So now I'll ask
Do you like that
Do you like that
The funeral was packed with their clients and co-workers and supposed friends. It was raining. The ultimate cliché its raining during a funeral. Neither one of their will's have been read yet. My dad was my parents lawyers, but some of his friends from the firm have been trying to open it and read it without breaking any laws. They said they'd contact me when they did. I personally didn't care what it said in the will. I've been living here since April 15th and today is June 11th. I'm used to the awful food, the even more awful people. The woman who runs this place doesn't care about anyone here.
No
I'm used to people lying. Saying one thing and doing something completely different betraying your trust. That was the story of my life. First my parents don't want me and they hand me off to the highest bidder. Then they only pretend to care long enough to jet off for business or just to get away for months at a time always leaving a note on the counter and enough money to feed a small city. My mom called it 'pocket change' I'll be the first to admit going to private schools forever riding in a limo everywhere and getting anything whenever I wanted sounded like a pretty kick ass life. To an outsider it really would. They didn't know the truth.
Something's getting in the way
Something's just about to break
I will try to find my place in the diary of jane
So tell me how it should be
My dad was an alcoholic and sometimes when he had a bad day at work or he and my mom faught he liked to take his anger out on me. It didn't happen that often he wasn't around enough for it to really bother me. I blocked it out every time he did it anyway. Covering up the bruises was easy, especially when it didn't happene very often. Even if I did call the cops I'm sure Richard Valmount would either defend himself and win or pay the cops off. My mom Veronica Valmount ignored it pretended like the abuse didn't exist. Kind of like what she did with my existance.
That might upset some children having the realization that their parents didn't love them or care. For me it wasn't a big deal. I never minded being home by myself I've always been independent. Now I know I didn't get that from Richard or Veronica that must have come from one of my real parents. I closed my eyes and tried to relax long enough to fall asleep, but after a few minutes I realized it was useless and I got up.
I made my way to the kitchen still listening to my ipod keeping it on repeat and fixed myself a bowl of lucky charms. It's been my favorite cereal forever. That was the only thing I had to look forward to in life anymore was getting the chance to eat something that I actually liked. I ate by myself. I do everyday for every meal. The people here are so pissed off or annoying I can't interact with any of them. They all know who I am so that just pissed me off even more. They all talk shit, but I ignore it because I don't care what any of them think.
Try to find out what makes you tick
As I lie down
Sore and sick
Do you like that
Do you like that
I go to school Monday throught Friday, but it was summer break and the next day after the accident word had spread about my parents. All the stares were irritating, but easy to ignore. I've always prided myself on not caring what others think. I had a philosophy if I'm content with myself why bother changing anything. If someone else doesn't like it than they can fuck off. I've always had an attitude and I know I got that from Veronica. She poisoned me with her bitchy ways since I was a little girl. The only good that came out of it was I can outbitch anyone and I was one hell of an intimidator so none of the posers at my school messed with me.
I was tough, but on the outside it really didn't look that way. I knew some of the hardest gang members in the city. That wasn't important though. I've had my fare share of friends. They weren't real friends. I had known that from the beginning, but it was better than hanging out by myself. Now I know that being by yourself is way better than wasting your time with a bunch of ass holes and sluts. That's what my so called 'best friends' were.
I had the same group since elementary school. It was me, Patrick, Jack, Kirsten, and Jack's sister Britney. We basically dominated the school, but in a weird way because of who my parents were I was considered the leader. Patrick asked me out in 8th grade. He was in 9th and so was Jack and Britney. They're the twins and I hate them both now. Kirsten was always my closest friend. Her mom was a model to and knew my mom. But when one person is the head of any group the other members always have a plan to take them down. That's exactly what they did to me.
My parents died on March 17th and on March 23rd I lost my virginity to Patrick and the same night I lost my innocence to Jack. Only an hour after Patrick and I finished having sex for the first time at a party at Jack and Britney's house I walked back into that room to find Patrick screwing Kirsten my best friend. I was shocked and they were so into it they didn't even notice me walk in or walk out. I went into Jack's room and cried on his bed. I was stupid enough to believe Patrick when he said he loved me. I never fully opened up to him, but I was close. He took advantage of my situation with my parents and tried to comfort me. I felt so betrayed and sad. I was also so busy crying I hadn't noticed Jack walk in and sit next to me on the bed. He started trying to comfort me, and I immediately got a bad feeling.
He and I had been friends for so long, but he always gave me a creepy feeling. He and Patrick had been best friends since they were in preschool. I had gotten screwed over trusting Patrick why bother with his best friend? I got up and he grabbed my wrist. I tried to yank it away, but he was stronger. The rest is pretty much history. Jack threw me down on the bed and after my screams of protest and fighting back didn't work he did what he claimed he been wanting to do since the minute I started going out with Patrick.
There's a fine line between love and hate
And I don't mind
Just let me say that
I like that
I like that
After that night I didn't have any friends. I didn't have any family. I walked back to the foster home and sat on the floor of my bathroom holding a razor to my wrist seriously considering ending all of it. I had lost myself entirely that night. I don't have a home and I'm damaged goods. I've been broken ever since then and I'm all alone. I never believed in physically hurting myself over and over hoping the pain would go away. I knew it would always be there no matter what so if I was going to cut it would be one time and I'd be done for good.
My thoughts were interrupted when Trisha the owner of the home walked in with 2 lawyers from my dad's firm.
"Allison how are you doing?" The bald one asked. I rolled my eyes.
"Fine Frank how are you?" I asked sarcastically. I hated fake people.
"I'm fine thank you." He said polietly. I got up and put my bowl in the sink. My ipod was still in on and I was trying to keep concentrating on the song.
"We have some news." Bill the other one said.
"What's that?" I asked turning around and leaning on the sink.
"We found your mother." He said. My jaw dropped. Did he just say my mother?
"My real mom?" I asked making sure. I didn't even know they looked for her.
"Yes she lives here in North Carolina in a small town called Tree Hill." Frank said opening up a file and handing it to me. I looked at the picture of the woman in awe. She had shoulder length dark brown hair like mine and was beautiful. Her name is Karen Roe. My real last name is Roe! This was all so surreal. The second I felt excited it was replaced with nothingness. I never wanted to know my real mom since she didn't give a shit about me from the beginning.
"Thanks but no thanks you guys I don't need this." I said handing the folder back to him.
"We've been looking for the past week. We thought you wouldn't want to live here anymore." Bill said looking around disgusted. I had to agree this place was terrible, but I wasn't interested in what I thought they were thinking.
"I don't want to meet her." I said in a emotion void voice. This was pointless.
"I think you should keep this we brought it to give to you incase you wanted to go there and meet her. The adoption papers are in there to." Frank pointed out. I turned the music up louder and grabbed the folder mumbling thanks and walking out of there.
"Hey Valmount!" Trisha yelled as I walked past without saying anything.
"What?" I asked not turning around. She probably annoyed me more than anyone else here.
"I walked past your room and almost threw up you know the rules keep it clean!" She spat and walked in the other direction. I turned around and flipped her off before going back upstairs.
Something's getting in the way
Something's just about to break
I will try to find my place in the diary of jane
As I burn another page
As I look the other way
I still try to find my place in the diary of jane
So tell me how it should be
I sat on my bed zoning out the rest of the world. This was the only thing that made sense to me was music. It was my passion. Music expressed how I felt or didn't feel better than anything. It was the only thing in my life that I can count on. I sat on my bed for hours listening at full volume clearing my head. Music also relaxed me faster than anything. The night I was raped I came home and listened to my ipod for 24 hours strait never leaving the bathroom floor. It was my outlet as I slowly piece by piece shut myself down from the world. The friends I used to have did nothing, but make fun of me and taunt me every chance they got. Patrick and Kirsten are together no surprise. They all know what Jack did, but didn't believe me when I told them. They're evil.
Desperate I will crawl
Waiting for so long
No love, there is no love
Die for anyone
What have I become
Before I knew it the entire day had passed as I sat still on my bed clutching the folder about my real parents. I shakily opened it up and read it all. I looked over the adoption papers and reread everything over and over again. I memorized the entire thing and without thinking I started packing a backpack. I put enough clothes for tonight and tomorrow and monday. I placed the folder on top of my backpack that I put on top of my bed. I took a nice long shower and got dressed in a black short sleeved shirt with a white tank top underneath with jeans and white flip flops. It was 8 o'clock when I went to the front desk in the entryway. Trish was reading a magazine.
"I'm leaving I'll be back Monday." I said and walked out the door putting my ear phones so I couldn't hear her bitch at me. I turned it all the way up when I called the cab to pick me up. I told him to take me to Tree Hill and I sat in the backseat silent the entire time holding my backpack anxiously awaiting meeting the woman who gave birth to me. It had been so long since I've had something to be anxious or excited about. This whole thing was so overwhelming and terrifying, but I was as ready as anyone could be. I closed my eyes and let my mind wander was I waited for the driver to pull up to her house.
Something's getting in the way
Something's just about to break
I will try to find my place in the diary of jane
As I burn another page
As I look the other
I still try to find my place in the diary of jane
That's the first chapter! Please review and tell me what you think or if you have any questions. The rest of the chapters will be a lot better this was just the introduction. I'll make sure to clear everything up as the story goes on!! Thanks for reading! 'Diary of Jane' Breaking Benjamin
xoxo Marissa Davis