Tears of the North Star, a saint seiya fanfic

Disclaimer: Saint Seiya, Hilda, Siegfried, and the rest belong to Kurumada-san. "Tears of Polaris" belongs to Nicholas Teo and the creators. Angst and story-ness and other stuff belongs to me.

Notes: The song I used for this fic is by Nicholas Teo, a Malaysian mandopop singer. The title of the song can be translated as "Tears of Polaris" (or "Tears of the North Star"), and I always thought of it as a sort of Hilda/Siegfried song. YES, the girl in the story is HILDA. And, yes, I do prefer you keep it that way, though I guess I can't do anything if you really want to think of her as somebody else. I did the translation of the song myself, and if you'd like to hear it, go to youtube and type in Nicholas Teo Polaris, and you should be able to find it.

It broke his heart to see her and not be able to hold her.

He placed two ghostly arms around her, pushing what little warmth he had into her. He wanted to tell her, but he had always been too afraid. Even dead, he was too afraid.

Like the thread breaking, you vanish into the sea of people
My eye finally loses your face
Wait a little longer, the shooting star of extravagant hopes will appear
I hope, if it really happens, can love be eternal
Tomorrow, maybe there is not enough time to change
but the yesterdays we once walked, are farther and farther away

She stood on the cliff and sobbed, tears flowing, making heartbreaking sounds. How he wanted to stop it and protect her forever and ever from the sorrow she felt.

"Siegfried..."

I'm here.

"Why does it matter so much?"

I'm not sure...

The tears of Polaris, an unspeakable longing
It seems we're really living in two different worlds
The tears of Polaris, your two eyes that are red from crying
The drenched promise drowns in the heart
I lift my head and look, I don't see love

He wondered the same thing, really. Why did they care so much, if it was something that would go nowhere?

That wasn't how stories worked. Stories were happily ever after. People who fell in love should have a future together.

Not like this.

She shouldn't be sobbing alone for someone who was dead, even if he loved her.

Wait a little longer, the shooting star of extravagant hopes will appear
I hope, if it really happens, can love be eternal
Tomorrow, maybe there is not enough time to change
but the yesterdays we once walked, are farther and farther away

He used to hope so hard. He would have given up everything in the world for an embrace or a kiss or a kind word or an "I love you..."

And now he knew, but he wasn't there anymore, and he wished instead that she'd never fallen in love with him. He didn't want her to suffer this way anymore.

They'd always lived in two worlds, even when he was with her. He lived as a warrior and a liege, she lived as a priestess and a queen. She led, he followed.

Then, he died and she lived.

Truly, two worlds.

When the right person can't find the right time
Just at the moment when hands let go, love is torn into two parts

He almost completely wished she would lose all her memories of him, even if a small part of him would have liked her to remember forever. But better that only he felt pain and not both of them.

Always, he had sidestepped and she had walked at a distance. They both avoided and pretended and suppressed and he thought perhaps he ought to have done something sooner. Not that he could anymore.

"Siegfried?"

Please… He was no longer sure what he was pleading for. Forget him? Or remember him? Or…just…stop hurting.

He did not want her to love him anymore, even if he was not telling the whole truth when he said that. He wanted to love her forever.

"Siegfried?"

I'm sorry…I'm sorry…

The entire universe is flowing with tears

"I love you..."

I...I love you, too.