Victorian Nonsense
What happens when The Hitcher takes a little trip down Fleet Street? All characters owned by Sweeney Todd and The Mighty Boosh, I don't own any of them.
It's a stormy, miserable day in London and customers are scarce for Mrs Lovett, who is leaning bored in a pile of flour on her worktop.
"Oh, I could just sit 'ere all day 'an no one would come through that door" she said quietly to herself, playing with some old dough. "Hmm, I wonder what mista' Todd is doing…"
She stood up and brushed some flour off her dress, barely looking less messy than she was. Suddenly, a flash of lightning burst upon the shop windows and the door flew open, the bell chingling loudly. Mrs Lovett screamed and jumped with fright. A dark silhouette was standing in the door.
Mrs Lovett was frozen in shock. "Please be a customer" she pleaded in her mind. Cackling, cockney laughter echoed through the shop and the dark figure walked into the light, revealing a top hat, green skin with a giant polo for an eye and long grey hair.
"Well well well. What do we 'ave 'ere then?" Said the intruder, still laughing. He walked up to Mrs Lovett, who was wide-eyed in fear. "Ah, it's a little woman, what services do you perform in this establishment my dear?" His face was close to hers, she could smell the pungent, minty breath.
"I… I.. make pies.." her voice quivered.
The frightening, minty green man prodded his cane into Mrs Lovett's forehead.
"I've gotta little proposition for yaaah! You sell yer pies, and give me 'alf tha profit and I won't rape ya behind tha countaah!"
Mrs Lovett tried not to cry, she was so scared of the freaky mint man! She wanted to scream for Sweeney to save her with his mighty razors but she knew the monstrous green bastard would be too powerful.
He cackled again and took his cane away from her face.
"I'll be back to-morrah!" he said and with a flick of his long coat he was gone.
Mrs Lovett slumped down on the floor and began to cry.
Whooo! First chapter :). Please R&R and tell me your thoughts on what should happen next on this Minty Tale of Blackmail!