Song-Fic How Rosalie reacts when Emmett tells her the simplest words of the whole World "I Love You"
Tell me what you think :) I got inspired today morning while i was going to school listening to this song in my MP3 player.
I own nothing from all this, SM owns the characters and the song is owned by its owners-creators.
It's unbeta-ed so be patient with me :)
The Reason
By the Hoobastank
I ran, fast, as fast as my vampiric body allowed me, I ran and didn't give a darn for anything, the delicious smell of blood from the hikers somewhere behind me, for the piercing smell of an elk that I actually passed in front of. I just ran like my existence depended on it, in a way it did, as my sanity.
I felt the guilt choking me, I had hurt him, him, the person who worshiped me every single day from the moment we met, I was his angel, he claimed every day, some angel I was.
I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
Emmett had been my angel, were I honest with myself. Emmett was my reason to keep up after my last, awful night of mortality and two years of adjusting and trying to live through every endless day with two good, new, adoptive parents and an irritating-to-death, older, adoptive brother but most of all with an excruciatingly difficult to cope with, self of mine.
I had found and saved Emmett, I had brought him to my father and he had changed him for me, Emmett had given me something I never believed I ever had, reason. But still, today I hurt him and now I was wondering, was I supposed to hurt everyone I touched? Was I as catastrophic as my life itself was?
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you
He had been honest with me, when he said the three words I once wished to hear every day from a husband of mine, the words Vera had been hearing ever since she had gotten married, the words I wanted to be true from someone addressing me, how different I was now, how those words now scared me, frighten me, made me crawl, now that had been said by that someone, hurting him too in the process.
I wished I hadn't ran, I wished I had the gut to stay there, like I did during the days of his turn, and reply his words equally, but I was so scared to be beaten again, sooner or later I was afraid I would be, once more. Even if I wanted to say and show him how much I felt for him, like he did with me, my own pain was still too fresh for me to get over it; I had lost too much to allow anyone close.
I stopped absurdly and a sound between a scream and a sob ripped through my lips, I was desperate, damaged and broken all over again, and this time it was entirely my fault. In my vampiric status, I couldn't even cry, get this pain out of my marble chest and then fall into an oblivious sleep as to forget those little words that Emmett had told me.
I love you I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with every day
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
That's why I need you to hear
I couldn't forget his red eyes looking at me with pain, the first signs of gold starting to be hinted in the red pools of his newborn face. The dimples, the innocence, all were damaged by me, by how I reacted, by how I gasped and wrestled out of his arms, of how I scared him with my own fears and darkness and I ran away.
I wish I could make it all better, I wish I could make him see that I wasn't an angel, I wasn't a good person by far. I was damaged and broken and I didn't deserve the happiness he so willingly was giving me, making me smile every day, after every endless night of sorrow and fatalistic thoughts.
Up to this day, we hadn't been separated for more than minutes, I had stuck up with him like he had done with me, calling me his angel and making me smile like none else before, in my human or vampiric years had achieved to do. And all that because I was seeing light in him, the light that had been taken from me, he was my sun when I was his angel, you needed the sun to see the angels in heaven and he certainly was my light and heaven.
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you
I realized I had fallen on my knees, on the forest floor, my dress getting dirty and muted as the environment around me was still fresh and wet from the rain, the previous night. Dry sobs were escaping my lips as the pain I cast on both mine and his soul hit me at full force. He knew about me, even if my dead heart had flattered in fear, I had confessed to him what was my story, a few hours ago. His newborn senses and temper had made it hard to keep him down as not to go to Rochester himself and kill those pieces of filth.
He had calmed down slightly only when I reassured him I had dealt with the ones destroying my life in the worst possible way. Even then, when he knew I wasn't a perfect person, far from it actually, he had kept looking at me like he did the first time he saw me, as he was seeing an angel, sent from God to him, to make him happy.
Only then he had stopped and hugged me, kissing my lips in a feather like brush of our skin and whispering the words that had made me end up here, crying with dry sobs and responsible of both of us pain.
I love you
I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
As I clutched on my chest, trying to calm down as I tried to short everything out in my head, I knew, I wasn't as scared and hurt by the words he had said, those tears weren't only of fear, they were also of relief and guilt at the same time. Relief for having someone to actually love me, and guilt for that someone having fallen in love with a person as damaged as I was.
I could feel the fear of not being able to tell him I loved him back. I did, I truly loved him, from the day I saw him, while I saw his face screwed in pain, during the moments of my run back home with him on my shoulders, while I was trusting all my will power as not kill him on my own as his blood was running down my back, overwhelming me. My love had been growing since then and it still grew, never stopping, filling my dead heart, making me hope again.
But still, I felt that if I did tell him I loved him back, I was giving him the power to crash me, and I couldn't be crashed again, not again, not from him, he meant too much to have such power on me, because this time, if he ever did such thing, I wouldn't recover. No Carlisle and no God and no vampiric venom would be able to heal me and I couldn't cope even with the possibility of the pain.
He was already holding my heart in his strong hand and he was too powerful for me to handle.
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you
Two gentle hands wrapped around my shoulders and pulled me upwards. I didn't struggle and I didn't wrestle, I knew it was him and I knew if I did the same thing I had done before, I would hurt him further, I preferred to get ripped apart and burnt than hurt him more. I was ready to apologize, to ask him for forgiveness and to reassure him that it was me and not any of his doing that coaxed such reaction from me.
No word came in my lips when our gazes locked, in that moment, I saw it all, clear as the rainbow after the rain, the innocence I thought I had seen only in Vera's Henry's eyes was also present in his eyes, but it wasn't just that, there was love, and the will to make me happy, the need of his to make me happy and I knew I was his reason as he was mine.
'I love you too,'
The words escaped my lips without me realizing it, I felt a jolt of fear running in my veins but as I kept my eyes in his, looking though his soul, like he did with mine, I knew I shouldn't be scared, he would never hurt me, even if he could, he would never hurt me.
That moment, I gasped, not even realizing I repaid him equally for what he had given me first: his heart and soul, forever.
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
So what you think of it? it's just a course of thoughts i couldn't get off my mind so i made it :) please tell me what u think of it :)
The chapter 14 of an Unexpected Turn will be up as soon as possible so stay tuned :)
thanks for reading, please reply :)