Who knows what you'll found in your pen drive that you claimed to be lost one year ago.
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No. She's not wrong. They are.
They are hurting her. All she ever asks is for it to end. The pain. The suffering. The sleepless night.
Yes, she just wants to sleep. To rest. She's tired. She can't take it anymore.
"Just for a while.
…Just for tonight."
It's no use. No matter how hard she tries, she just can't.
Every time she closed her eyes, the darkness seems to be swallowing her even more. She felt paralyzed, as if her body was covered with rope, tying her so hard, so tight. She felt numb. Remembering the blood that stained the sheet only causing nausea, adding more pain. It just can't go on like this.
Why won't the tears fall? She's trying to let it all out. The feelings are piling up inside her. She wants to emptied herself from everything. She wants to be free, she wants to be able to smile again.
She wants to remember how it was to be happy.
Deciding that it is time to end this, she slowly gets up and sits at the corner of her bed. Her eyes were fixed at the small bottle on the desk. Can it make the pain go away? Will it stop the numbs, the nausea? Can she finally
…rest?
No! She's stronger than this. She's strong, she knows it.
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BAM!
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A blow on her stomach. Kneeling on the floor, her hands hugging herself. Hoping, somehow she can stops the pain.
"Why? Why must this happen to me?"
She cried silently. She didn't ask for all of this. She didn't ask for the pain. She didn't ask for the ruthless life. She didn't ask to be born.
She rolled to her side. Can she survive for one more night? Can she wake up without feeling sore all over her body? Can she actually pretend that this night was nothing but a dream? A nightmare? Can she sleep tonight?
Slowly, she looks up and her eyes fall to that small bottle again. Her sight is getting blurry. It's okay, right? Just one pill won't kill her.
Right?
Just for tonight. She doesn't remember how, but she's already standing in front of the desk. Her hand's trembling as she grabs the bottle. The sound of the pills shaking inside the bottle fills the room.
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Just one.
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She doesn't care anymore. She knows that this is the only way out. This is the only way she can rest.
One pill in her hand.
She smiles.
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She can finally sleep.
She closed her eyes as she felt the pill moves down her throat. Now it's only a matter of time.
She walks back to her bed, burying herself under the cover, waiting for the pain to go. For the darkness to swallows her in whole. And this time, she doesn't care anymore.
"Goodnight."
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"Rin. Rin, wake up!"
Someone is calling her. That voice sounds so familiar.
"Rin! RIN!"
She knew that voice. It was her twin brother.
She felt her body shakes so hard. Don't. It hurts.
She tries to tell him to stop, but she can't. Her voice won't come out.
"Rin, please… …wake up! Look … … the… … … It's… …"
What? What are you trying to say? She couldn't hear him anymore.
"Look, Rin… It's… red… Rin… now!"
What is red? She tries to open her eyes. I can't… I… I can't open my eyes.
Is this it? Is she going to…
Die?
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SPLASH!
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"What the...!" She quickly stands on her feet. "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?"
"I'm sorry but this is the only way I can think of to wake you up. You were dead asleep."
"What are you waking me up for?!"
Her face was red from the anger. Not only she's awake now, she's drenched and there's a pool of water on the dark red bed sheet.
"Arghhh! I swear, Len, why won't you just…!"
.
Wait.
Dark red?
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She looks to her bed, and back to the boy in front of her, back to her bed.
"Oh." Everything is clear now.
"Yup. You better clean that fast or we are going to be late for school." The boy calmly walks out of the room.
Rin stares blankly at the dark red blood that stains the white sheet.
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"Damn period."