A/N: I'm not sure where this came from, but it is here so, if you like, enjoy it.
Anyway, before it starts let me thank Phoenixnext for the invaluable help. I know, i made you cry blood and probably damaged your brain, sorry.
-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-
Prologue
Mid-Childa 0076 (Earth 2017)
Commander Hayate Yagami gave a last glance to the digital paperwork displayed over her desk before slumping back into her chair.
"Are you sure?" she asked.
"Yes. I've been thinking about it for some time... and there is also Vivio now so…"
"Nanoha..." Hayate cut her off.
Nanoha's shoulders dropped. "I can't Hayate. There are too many memories here. Fuck, even the bad taste of the coffee reminds me of her. I have to go."
"But… it's been only a little more than a year," said Hayate, a last desperate move to keep her friend with her. With them.
"It's been already more than a year, and it hurts as if everything happened just yesterday. Please, Hayate."
"Let me make it just 'temporary,' I should be able to guarantee a little paycheck and should you change your mind…"
"Yeah," scoffed Nanoha, "so the first high ranked pig with delusions of grandeur can pressure me to come back. No, Hayate, I want to be out of here forever."
Hayate sighed, knowing she had lost. Her hands lingered just for a second over the keyboard, before tapping quickly. An 'APPROVED' watermark appeared across the resignation form.
"Done," said Hayate, without any trace of her usual mirth, "No turning back now."
"Thanks." Nanoha felt a turmoil of emotions fighting inside her, mostly relief and fear for the future. As she stood, Hayate quickly walked around her desk and caught her in a bone-crushing hug, keeping the tears at bay by sheer willpower.
"What will you do?" her voice thick with emotion.
"For the time being, I'm going back to Uminari."
"To… your parents?" asked tentatively Hayate, knowing that the subject was more dangerous than a minefield.
"It will snow in hell before I go back to his house," spatted Nanoha with the coldest voice Hayate had ever hear from her. Then she continued with a more mellow tone, "But Arisa and Suzuka are still there and they are helping me finding a house and a job."
Hayate was still clinging to her, not ready to let her friend go, she knew that it will be a long time before they can meet again. "Do you have some options already?"
"Actually… yes. I've been offered a position at Uminari High School. Thanks to the papers TSAB... hemm… forged for me I am qualified to teach math or P.E."
"Please, for the sake of your future students, let it be math," joked Hayate, "or you'll drill them to death before the end of the first term." The friendly mockery lightened the mood, and both girls let out some giggles.
"Mou, Hayate, you're so mean. I'm sure they'd last a little longer."
Then Hayate tightened her hold on her and kissed her cheek soundly. "I will miss you. Everyone will miss you," she couldn't stop a tear to run from her eyes as she spoke.
"I will miss you all too. Come visit whenever you can, you will always be welcome, ok?"
"Sure," she freed the girl, then added, "Good luck, Nanoha. Stay well."
"You too Hayate. Thanks for everything," said Nanoha. She gave her now ex-commander a last salute, then she walked through the door closing it behind her.
Hayate sat back heavily on her chair, two fingers pinching the root of her nose. 'One gone for good and the other always wandering around the universe. How did we come to this?' No one answered her, but she didn't need it anyway, because she already knew the reasons that crushed one of the best couples she ever met.
Earth 2020 (Mid-Childa 0079)
It happens to everyone, in every city, in every part of the world. One can live his entire life in the same place, thinking he knows it like the back of his hand, until something, be it a roadblock, a distraction, or maybe even fate, forces him to take that second street he never took before, that turn he never had reason to take then find himself in a place he's never seen before.
That was exactly what happened one Saturday in the life of a 10 years old Vivio Takamachi. It started like usual, her Nanoha-mama went to pick her up after school and they were walking at a leisurely pace back to their house. As with any other Saturday, Vivio nagged her for an ice cream, and like any other Saturday Nanoha faked her denial only to yield when they arrived near the parlour. As usual, they walked savouring the sweet treat, chatting about anything that popped in their mind: school, friends, work, games. As usual, they were going to take a turn into a very well known street only to find their path blocked by a plastic strip, on which someone hung a board saying, "men at work". Just behind it, they could see a huge hole in the ground and a group of men with yellow helmets working on large pipes.
Vivio looked at her mother with questioning eyes and Nanoha just shrugged. "It seems we have to go exploring!" she told her with a conspiratorial grin and Vivio beamed her a smile in return.
They passed the blocked street and simply turned into the next one that ran parallel to their usual path. Just a little change in their habits, nothing to be stressed about, and so they resumed their usual pace, usual chat, usual everything.
They were halfway through that newly discovered street when Vivio noticed that Nanoha started to act strangely. Every now and then her eyes darted from one side to the other and her brows creased slightly, her pace got slower and slower, until she came to a stop. As Vivio raised her head to her, she saw Nanoha looking intently at the house on the other side of the street. It was a nice two storied house, with a little garden separating the front from the sidewalk, very much like the other buildings they already passed on their way home. If she had to point out a difference, only its roof and window frames were a darker tone than the others, but still a common color, used countless times on countless other houses.
"You all right, Mama?" Vivio asked tentatively, taking Nanoha out of her reverie.
Nanoha shooked her head slowly, then looked back to Vivio with a smile, but it was lacking her usual mirth. "Yes, sweetie, don't worry. It's nothing."
Maybe Vivio was still young, but she already knew that there were 'nothings' that were really nothing and 'nothings' that were 'something'. This seemed to be one of the latter case, but she didn't know how to act on it. Not that Nanoha gave her time to think, since she ruffled her hair and made them resume their walk, leaving the house and that 'nothing' behind their backs. Or that had been the plan.
-o-o-o-
That night, Vivio found it hard to fall asleep. She was tossing and turning in her bed, but something was nagging in the back of her head. Since they got home her mother had been acting strangely. She smiled, she talked to her, she made dinner but she was kind of… absent. There had been other times that her mama was worried for something, usually related to her job, but today had been different. She seemed sad.
After a while, Vivio surrendered and got off her bed, since sleep wasn't coming lying there was worse than futile. She decided to go down to the living room, maybe a little time with the telly would bore her enough to make her sleepy.
As she was tip-toeing down the hallway, she heard a muffled sound coming from her mother's room and she froze in place, thinking her nightly escapade had already been discovered. How did her mama always know what she was up to was a mystery to Vivio. Was it some kind of magic power bestowed to girls when they become mothers? However, that didn't matter and Vivio steeled herself for the incoming reprimand. That didn't come.
She stood in the hallway, facing the door to her mother's room, waiting for it to open for a minute, two minutes, five minutes. Nothing happened. Or - at least - not what she was expecting, because the muffled sound came again, and again, and again. And then Vivio realized what she was hearing: someone behind that door was sobbing and given that there should be only one occupant…
Worried for her mother, she slowly reach for the handle and silently cracked the door open. In the darkened room, she could see the silhouette of her mother curling on the bed. Every sob she could hear was accompanied by a small flinch from the laying form.
That wasn't right. Adults didn't cry, adults were strong, and her mama was the strongest of them all. She didn't know what could have hurt Nanoha so much to make her weep, but she felt she saw something she was not supposed to see. Vivio closed the door and ran to hide in her bed hoping that her mama didn't notice her, afraid that tomorrow morning would bring some kind of punishment for what she did. But then again, did she do something? She just wanted to be sure her mama was ok, wasn't it the right thing to do? She went back and forth with those thoughts for a good part of the night, until finally sleep caught her.
The next morning a very anxious Vivio went downstairs. Had Nanoha seen her? Will she scold her? But, more important, was she better? She cautiously entered the kitchen, where Nanoha was cooking some pancakes.
"Good morning Vivio." Nanoha greeted "Sit, breakfast will be ready in a moment."
Vivio looked at her mother, it was clear she was still upset. She looked weary and her eyes were red. Any thought about scolding forgotten, Vivio threw herself at Nanoha and hugged her tightly.
"Vivio what…" but her daughter cut her words. "Are you ok, mama?" she asked, her voice trembled a little.
Taken by surprise, Nanoha mentally scolded herself, what a mother! Making her child worry for something that she should have already left behind herself. She hugged Vivio back and kissed her head. "Yes… yes sweetie, I'm ok. Did I make you worry?" Vivio nodded, hiding her face against her mother's chest. Nanoha sighed "I'm sorry."
"Don't be!" replied Vivio "It doesn't matter." Nanoha's earth melted a little, and for the upteenth time she thanked the universe for giving her Vivio. She kneeled to be on her daughter's eye level "Listen, what if after breakfast we go out and do something fun?"
Vivio looked at her with a glee in her eyes, then asked in a sheepish tone "It's still warm… can we go to the aquapark?" Nanoha giggled at the sudden change "Of course we can. But first, breakfast. Ok Vi?"
Vivio beamed her a smile and nodded. "Hun!" then ran to her seat making Nanoha giggle once more. Maybe she wasn't ok yet, but she felt better.
Earth 2020 (Mid-Childa 0079) - some months later
Vivio was worried. After that awful night, her mother went back to her usual self and the accident was quickly forgotten. Until now.
Right from the start of the day Vivio noticed that her mother was somewhere away with her head, but she didn't have the time to find what was happening before school. And when she finally went back home, things were even worse. Not only Nanoha was still lost in her thought, but she had a forlorn look in her eyes that Vivio was sure she had already seen once…
An image of her mother weeping in bed suddenly hit her and she snapped her head toward her mama. Was she going to cry again? And what should Vivio do? Ignore it? Confront her mother? But before she could make a choice, Nanoha told her she was going to have an early night, blaming an annoying headache. Of course, Vivio didn't believe a single word.
She was laying in her bed, wide awake with ears trained to the door she left open. She hoped she was wrong, that her mama had really just a headache, but if that wasn't the case, she wanted to be ready. For what? She didn't know. After one hour Vivio was finally starting to relax. Nanoha had retired for quite some time now and the house was peaceful, maybe she had let her imagination run wild a little too much and worried for nothing.
Then she heard the first sob and sprang up, again wondering what to do. Like the first time, she tiptoed to her mother's room, but she didn't stop outside. She stepped into the room and stopped, listening. Between the sobs, she noticed that her mama was murmuring something, her voice too low for Vivio to understand the words. Still without a clear idea on how she could help, she reached Nanoha's side of the bed. She heard her mother whispering a name she never heard before "Fate-chan...".
Nanoha was slowly coming to her senses, running away from a sad dream dyed in blonde and burgundy. She knew she was crying and someone was clumsily caressing her head, trying to comfort her. When she finally opened her eyes she saw the worried face of her daughter. "Vivio…" she said groggily. Startled, Vivio jumped back trying to justify her presence "I… I… I had a nightmare!" she blurted "Can I sleep in your bed?".
'Worst liar ever.' thought Nanoha, but then she scooted away and lifted the sheet. Vivio didn't waste a second, climbed onto the bed and curled into her mother, draping an arm around her. Nanoha sighed, feeling a mix of emotions rolling inside: the lingering sadness of the dream, shame for letting Vivio see her in that state but more than anything warm love for her child. Kissing her daughter's head, she settle down hoping to get some more rest.
When Nanoha's breath finally grew deep and slow, Vivio started to relax, knowing that her mother was sleeping peacefully. Her last coherent thought of the day was that she didn't know who this Fate person was, but she was sure of one thing: they hurt her mama and made her sad and for that she will never forgive them.
Earth 2021 (Mid-Childa 0080)
If asked, Vivio would not be able to give a reason, but that house planted itself in the back of her mind and never left. That's probably why - once she gained permission to wander around alone - one of her first 'adventures' had been going to find it again. Vivio stared intently at it when she stood outside its garden and a suspicion she held since that first time finally found confirmation: while it was generally well-maintained, she was sure nobody lived there. Mustering all the courage she could, Vivio took her first step beyond the gate.
The front garden was small, but she saw that a narrow path of green seemed to continue on the building's side. She slowly approached the front edge, her belly clutched in a knot of thrill for the adventure, fear of being discovered and curiosity. She walked down the small pathway till its end, where she immediately decided that, from now on, this would be her secret hideout.
The back garden she found was quite larger than its front counterpart. A tall fence provided enough privacy from the neighbourhood, and some well-placed trees hid a bench and swing from some second-story windows.
She sat on the swing, rocking slowly back and forth. Yes, she was sure, that would not be the last time she will 'visit' the house.
Earth 2025 (Mid-Childa 0084)
Once again, Vivio was sitting on the swing in 'her' secret place. After she found the house again, she used the place every time she needed to be by herself for a while. She never found the house occupied, although she learned that once a month someone - a specialized company, probably - passed by to tend to the house and the garden. At first she was afraid that it would mean the owners were coming back, but as the years went by no one came to occupy the building again. Not that she was complaining, of course, especially that day.
The previous night her mama had another 'Fate-chan' moment, and like every single time it broke Vivio's heart a little. To see her wonderful, strong mother curled up in her bed was hard on her, she'd give anything to help her. But what could she do considering she didn't even know what the problem was? Someone in the past hurt her mama badly, that was clear, but who this Fate-chan person was remained a mystery. Once she asked her uncle Yuuno, but he refused to give any explanation, saying that it wasn't his secret to reveal. "Listen Vivio, maybe one day Nanoha will tell you everything, but until then forget about it."
Then, after a moment he added "I shouldn't tell you this, but… just be sure to never mention that name to your grandparents." So not only didn't she learn anything, but she was even more confused than before.
And so, there she was again, finding sanctuary in a garden that wasn't her own trying to chase away the gloomy feeling that weighed on her mind.
"I didn't know my garden had become a public park". She heard someone say from behind her. Taken by surprise, she let out a squeal and fumbled with the swing. Panicked she loosened her hold on the chain and slid out of the seat, falling on the grass.
Trying to get her breath back, she looked up and saw a blond head looking at her with a mix of amusement and concern. "Hey, are you alright?" Asked the newcomer.
Vivio sprang on her feet, feeling cold drip of sweat running down her back 'Oh, shit! She must be the owner. What will she do to me now?'
"No ma'am. I mean, yes ma'am. Please, ma'am, I know I shouldn't have… I mean, it's private, and of course you know it because it's your house, but I never… I mean, I just used the swing from time to time, since there wasn't anyone…"
"Oh, so it's not even the first time?" replied the woman.
Vivio's jaw slackened, had she really just sold herself so easily? She just confessed to be a recurring trespasser? Would the woman send her to prison? But as soon as Vivio was ready to get on her knees and beg for forgiveness, the older blonde broke in a fit of giggles. Befuddled, Vivio could only snap her mouth closed.
"Relax, sweetie, you're not in trouble, ok?" With a deep sigh Vivio started to breath again, and finally had the chance to actually see who she was talking to and found herself looking at someone who must be a model. Tall, gorgeous, with long blond hair framing a beautiful face and deep red eyes that - at the moment - were shining with amusement. "Thank you miss." Vivio finally answered.
"Come inside, I should have a brush for your clothes somewhere." She led Vivio down a short, narrow hallway that ended in an open living room. The woman took a door on the side, motioning Vivio towards the couch. "Make yourself at home." Then she stuck her head out of what Vivio thought was the kitchen. "Do you want something to drink?"
"I-I don't want to impose…"
"Nonsense. If I offer, it means there's no problem. What do you want?"
"Well… maybe.. Juice?" replied sheepishly Vivio.
"Very good. I'll be back in a jiffy." And disappeared through the door once again.
Vivio used the time to explore the room: the furniture was the same she saw countless time in other houses, but very well matched and - even to her inexperienced eyes - it seemed quite expensive.
Her attention fell onto a frame laying forgotten on the coffee table, like someone was looking at it and just dropped it there. She picked it up to look at the picture: two young girls, probably a little younger than her, were smiling from behind the glass, holding hands. One of them was probably her host, given the same blond hair and - more noticeable - the peculiar red of her eyes. It was the other girl that gave Vivio a strange feeling because she was sure she had already seen her somewhere.
She was still focused on the picture when the woman came back, a tray in her hand held two glasses, one of juice and one that Vivio surmise could be ice tea, and some cookies. "Oh, a trespasser AND a spy, I see…" she said with a teasy voice while setting the tray on the low table. Vivio couldn't help but blush a little, even though she knew the woman was just joking, but when she looked at her she could see that something in her expression had changed, like if a faint shadow was covering her eyes.
Pointing at the picture, she said "This is from when I was ten. The one on the left is me and the other girl was… a very special friend." Her voice went softer on the last words.
Vivio looked back at the picture and finally something clicked in her mind, a voice of another woman played from her memories 'Do you want to see some pictures of your mama when she was young?' 'Who is this girl?' 'She was… a special friend of your mother.'
Vivio was speechless when she finally recognized the girl. How could she have missed it? Hadn't she seen that girl - now an adult - just a couple of hours before? It was her mama, she had no doubt, but why did the blond woman have a picture with her Nanoha?
Slowly, Vivio raised her face from the frame and looked at the woman again. "Who are you?" she asked. Her mama would had scold her for the bluntness, but at that moment it was all her brain was able to put together.
Fate arched an eyebrow at the sudden question. Sure, she hadn't introduced herself, but neither had her unusual guest. Dismissing the mild rudeness of the young blonde, she answered "Aside being the owner of the house, I'm Fate. Fate Testarossa."
Vivio's brain gave up and ceased to work at all, her eyes locked to the woman, widened at the sudden realization. "Fate-chan." she said in a whisper.
"Well.. " Said Fate, taken by surprise "It's been awhile since the last time someone called me…"
"MONSTER!" cut her short Vivio, shouting with rage. "What did you do to my mother?" she pressed on, "Why did you have to hurt my mama?"
Fate was speechless by the sudden aggression. The girl was trembling in anger, blaming her for something she surely had not done. This was the first time she'd met the girl, after all she'd been off-planet for years. There was no way she could have done something to her or her family.
Only then she saw that the girl was still holding the frame, hugging it tight in a protective way and Fate reached a scary, horrible realization. 'It's impossible! She can't be.. She can't..' But even if it was impossible, she had to ask "Who are you?" not realizing she used the same words the girl did just a moment before.
The girl straightened her back and looked firmly in Fate's eyes. "I'm Vivio Takamachi. Nanoha Takamachi is my mother." She answered, a hint of pride colored her voice.
For Fate it was like someone had just punched her, she felt her guts tightening in a knot and for a long instant she was unable to breath. The anger in Vivio's eyes was tearing holes in her to the point she had to lower her head. She wanted to say something, to talk to the girl but what could she say? Give her excuses? Ask for explanations? Deny… deny what? However, words were failing her and she could just stand here speechless.
On her side, Vivio wasn't faring any better, the riot of emotions she was feeling was growing by the minute, until she couldn't stand it anymore. "I hate you!" she said, pouring years of frustration for not being able to help her mother in those words. Then she turned and ran for the door, away from that woman, away from the house and the garden that had been her sanctuary.
She didn't know how long she ran, nor how far she went until she had to stop, breathless. The exertion had the effect of drawing off most of her anger, and eventually the red fog that was hampering her brain lifted. Only then she realized she was still clutching the picture tightly. 'Shit. What now?' she thought. 'I don't like the idea that I've stolen something, even if it's from that… bitch.' She took a deep, calming breath and looked again at the picture. The girls were still there, smiling at each other, like being together was the only thing that mattered to them. She traced their figures with a finger 'They seem so happy. What happened to make them fall out… I don't even know that. I yelled at that Fate woman and I don't know why.' She felt a little ashamed by her actions, this was not what her mama taught her. Nanoha would have tried to talk, to reach for the other and yet she just lashed out at Fate.
She sighed, uncertain on what to do. She would have to give back the picture, that was a given, but she wasn't ready to face the woman again, not without knowing what really happened. But there was a person who could help, someone she was sure she could talk to and - she hoped - she would be able to persuade her to tell the truth.
She took out her phone and quickly dialed a number, trying to calm herself while she was waiting for the other to answer. "Hello Aunt Miyuki" she said trying to sound her usual cheerful self. "Do you have a minute for me? I need… advice."
-o-o-o-
As soon as she got inside Cafe Midori-ya, she found herself crushed in her aunt's hug and the greeting of, "Vivio!" with a big smile and "I'm so happy to see you!" warmed her heart.
Vivio giggled and returned the hug, "Hi, aunty" she said back. She loved the woman, her mother's elder sister was her favorite among the long line of friends and relatives.
Still smiling, Miyuki released her "So, advice? From me and not from your mama?" she said with a sly smirk "Does it means our little Vivio has her eyes on a boy?"
Blushing, Vivio stuttered "What? N-No! Nothing like that!" After a moment she added "But it's rather… personal. Can we go somewhere more... hu… private?"
Miyuki arched an eyebrow curious, but then she shrugged and lead Vivo to the Takamachis' adjoined house and up to her old room. As soon as her aunt sat on the bed, Vivio dropped her cheerful mask and with a stern expression she shoved the frame into Miyuki's hands. "Now you will tell me everything about them. I want to know who Fate Testarossa is and why I have to see my mama call her name crying."
Miyuki didn't know what was startling her more, Vivio's no-nonsense tone, the questions she was asked or the name she had not heard for nearly 10 years. Looking down at the frame she immediately recognized the duo. "Fate-chan" she said with a wistful smile. Then she looked back at her niece, "Vivio, I don't think I should…" But Vivio had no intention of relenting, and quickly cut her off "Fine, I'll go ask your parents."
"No!" shouted Miyuki, and quickly grabbed her wrist. Vivio looked at her hand, then she leveled her gaze to Miyuki's eyes. They stared at each other for a moment, then Miyuki closed her eyes and released a deep sigh, letting Vivio free. "Fine" she said, "I'll tell you. I still think you should ask Nanoha, but maybe you have the right to know." She looked back at the girls in the frame, trying to recollect her thoughts.
"Fate was… well, we can say she should have been your other mama." Seeing Vivio's puzzled expression, she added with a smirk "Fate was Nanoha's girlfriend."
"Oh...Wait!... girlfriend as in… like, they were together-together? I mean, a… a couple?" asked Vivio, eyes wide in surprise.
"Yes," giggled Miyuki "They were in love."
Speechless, Vivio plopped down on the bed next to her aunt. "Are you telling me my mama is… that she likes girls?"
"I don't know if she's gay-gay" said Miyuki bluntly "But I know she loved.. No, she was in love with Fate," then, she asked her tentatively "Is it a problem for you?"
Vivio thought about it for a moment "No. No it isn't." she answered sincerely "It's just… unexpected, that's all."
Miyuki nodded, then she went back to the story, "They met when they were both nine, and they had been inseparable since then. In hindsight, the signs that their friendship was developing in something deeper were there all along. We just didn't see them. Or maybe we decided to not see them, I don't know."
Vivio looked again at the picture "They seem happy."
"Just happy?" snorted Miyuki "Disgustingly happy! When they were together they were literally glowing."
Vivio's mind was full of questions, but voiced only the most pressing one "Then.. what happened?"
Miyuki's expression suddenly hardened "Our stupid father happened!" she spat out. She took a deep breath trying to subdue the spark of anger, then she went on, "It was… a little more than a year before she took you in. They came to the café, Nanoha was bouncing with joy and asked to talk to the whole family. We were amused by her antics, she was radiating happiness and we were curious so we played along." she paused for a moment, lost in the memories "It was… perfect, Vivio. We were the image of a sickeningly happy family. Then Nanoha showed us the ring. Fate had proposed her, and she had accepted. When she said 'we're going to get married'... you should had seen her, her eyes were sparkling…. Really, I have no words to describe it."
Seeing that Miyuki had stopped, Vivio asked quietly "It didn't go well, right?"
She sighed again "No, it didn't. My father… exploded. He told them… no, I won't repeat what he said, just know that, in the end, he gave Nanoha an ultimatum: Fate or us. We were so angry at him, everyone started yelling, we.. we used words we never…"
Miyuki had to stop for a moment, forcing her hands to unclench. "Nanoha and Fate left without a word, but their faces told everything. We tried to contact them, to tell them they didn't have to listen to him, but they never replied, never called back. After a month, we received a message from your mama. She told us that Fate broke up with her and left for a long-term mission."
"Coward" murmured Vivio, but Miyuki's reaction startled her. She slapped the back of her head and scolded her "You don't know anything about Fate, don't be so hasty to judge!"
"But she is! She ran away instead of fighting for them!"
"And Nanoha did the same, she let her leave."
Vivio couldn't believe what Miyuki said, was she really blaming Nanoha? Wasn't she supposed to be on her side?
"As I said," Miyuki continued, "You don't know anything about her. Fate didn't had a nice childhood, her mother was … not a nice person. Then she met Nanoha and later she was adopted by a kind woman. She finally knew what a real family is, and ours was something like a role model for her. When she saw that her presence was threatening it… she did what she thought was right. She had seen how much pain my father's words caused Nanoha and she thought it was her fault, she was breaking us apart and she couldn't stand it. She didn't leave because she was a coward, she did it because she didn't want to force Nanoha to choose between her and her family."
Vivio didn't know what to say. Maybe Fate's reasons weren't wrong, but did it mean she was right? "I don't understand. They were in love, they had each other. Why leave?"
Miyuki sighed again "Vivio, things aren't always black or white. No, most of the time they aren't. There are a lot of things to take in consideration here. First, they were young. I know, working for TSAB made them grow faster, but they were still barely 20. Then, they weren't expecting that reaction, my father loved Fate, he really did. And Nanoha… she always felt she was a sort of third wheel, she fought for a place in our family, not that she had to, we all love her and always had, but that was what she felt. And seeing how her place was at risk again… I think she froze. Fate knew that if she had to, Nanoha would have chosen her, but she also knew that it would have destroyed your mother. That's why she decided to choose for her."
Vivio stayed silent for a while, then she asked "You mean Fate played the role of the 'bad guy' so mama didn't have to suffer more?"
"Something like that," answered Miyuki "I can't say it was the right choice, nor can I say it was the wrong one. She did what she thought was best for Nanoha, even if it hurt them both."
Thinking about everything she'd been told, Vivio realized that her aunt hadn't told her one thing, probably the most important. "Why?" she asked.
Miyuki frowned a little, not understanding what Vivio was asking her "Why what?"
"You told me what happened, but you didn't tell me why. Why Shiro-san reacted so strongly? I don't pretend to know him like you, but… he's always been nice to me, I can't imagine him attacking them without a reason. Was it just because they were both girls?"
"In a way it was even worse. He told Nanoha that she was tarnishing the Takamachi family. That she was bringing shame on him and his name."
Vivo couldn't believe it "So it was just a matter of.. pride?" she felt her anger rise again, unable to stay still she started to pace the room. "Are you telling me he didn't give a damn about them, their happiness and dreams because he was scared of what people could say? But that's crazy!"
"I know, Vivio. We all know." Miyuki told her. "We tried to talk some sense into him, but before we could do anything, Fate had already left. Don't think we agreed with him or just let it be." She pondered a moment then she decided that Vivio had the right to know "Why do you think my mom sleeps in Nanoha's room?"
"What?" she shouted "He… he let his stupid pride ruin even his marriage?" Miyuki just shrugged. They both stayed silent, lost in their own thoughts for a while, then a question sparked in Miyuki's mind. "Wait a minute!" she almost shouted "How do you know about Fate? And where did you get this picture?"
Vivio blushed a little, telling her how she met Fate would mean also revealing that she'd been sneaking into someone else's property for all those years. "I… I met her. It's a long story." she hurried to add, hoping that her aunt won't pry further "Anyways the picture is hers."
"Fate is back?" asked a bewildered Miyuki, "Is she staying? And you talked to her? What did she say?"
She squirmed a little under the piercing gaze of Miyuki, then sighed "I may not have been very… friendly. Ok, it's an understatement, I lashed out at her."
"You did what?"
"Listen, I know, I was wrong, but put yourself in my shoes. For years I had to see my mom hurting for this Fate person and then here she was, laughing and joking like she hadn't a single trouble in the world. I just… lost it." She plopped down on the bed next to her aunt, then added in a more subdued tone "I ran away, I didn't even realize I still had the picture. And when I finally could think straight again I knew I had to give it back and apologize, but for what? I don't know what happened… well, I didn't until a moment ago, but what if she deserved it? What if she didn't? And then I thought that Nanoha-mama would be mad at me. Well, of course, she was that Fate-chan person and she is still someone important for my mama, but-".
"Ok, stop right there. You're rambling." said Miyuki with a giggle, making Vivio blush in embarrassment as she snapped her mouth closed.
"First: yes, you did wrong, but I understand your reasons. Next, you're right, you have to go apologize to Fate and give her back the picture." Then, after a deep sigh, Miyuki admitted "And you were right to come to me. If Fate is really back, we have to tread a fine line."
"What do you mean?" asked Vivio.
"Isn't it obvious?" But Vivio just looked back with a dumbfounded expression. "Come on, you're smarter that this. Look at the facts. From one side, you're mama is still deeply affected by their break up, or she wouldn't cry for Fate, even if it's just a couple of nights per years. And Fate… well…" She waved at the framed picture "After all these years, she still keeps something like that at hand. It means something, don't you think?"
Vivio was lost in her thought for a moment, then she said "You know, when I yelled at her… I think it hurt her. Wait, do you think that they are still-".
"I think we should not jump to conclusions. For now, just give Fate back the picture and apologize. And don't tell anything to Nanoha."
"Aunty, I can't keep it from her!" Vivio was almost outraged by the suggestion "If anything, she will skin me alive!"
"I'm not saying we will hide it forever. Just a couple of days. Let's see how Fate reacts when you'll meet her again. If it goes well, then and only then ask her if you can tell Nanoha she's back." Vivio frowned, clearly not fond of the plan. "Vivio, I know what you're thinking. They're still in love, they can start again, bla bla bla. And - if you want to know - I agree with you, but we can't be sure. What if you tell your mother and then Fate rejects her again?" Vivio shuddered at the idea. "What if Nanoha rejects Fate? They are both dear to me and I don't want to see either of them suffering. My father already caused enough of that."
"Ok, ok. I don't like it, but you have point." then taking back the picture Vivio added "I think it's better if I go to talk to Fate immediately. God, what a mess!"
They made their way back to the café in silence, both lost in their thoughts. Vivio couldn't get her head around the things she'd been told, about her mother, about Fate, but more than anything about her grandfather. How to reconcile the loving man she knew with the bastard who ruined his own daughter's life? Did it mean that he would be ready to turn on her too? She felt cheated, more and more angry at the two-faced man.
She was snapped out of her brooding thoughts by a voice calling from behind. "Hey, Vivio. Running away without even sparing a kiss for your poor grandpa?" Said Shiro with mocked annoyance. Usually his cheerful voice made her giggle, but not today. She felt like his words were oozing onto her skin, making her shudder. She wanted to hurt him, to make him pay, to… to…
Miyuki saw Vivio turning to the man with the most bright and disgustingly sweet smile ever. She immediately knew what that expression meant: Trouble.
"Of course not, Shiro-san!" replied Vivio with a singsong tone. "But I came here just to have quick chat with aunt Miyuki."
"Oh, girl talk, then." Said Shiro, winking at her.
"More or less. I couldn't wait to tell her about my new friend!" Miyuki slapped a hand on her face, so much for 'keep it a secret' and 'be careful'. Her antics didn't go unnoticed by Momoko, who arched a questioning brow.
"I'm so excited!" continued Vivio "She's a foreigner, tall, gorgeous. But she's also kind, smart and with a cutting sense of humor."
"Mmm.. seems like you met a supergirl, now I'm curious to meet her too. Why don't you bring her with you next time?"
Vivio clasped her hands in front of her "This is a great idea, Shiro-san," she said in a over exaggerated tone "I'm sure Fate will love here."
Shiro's smile faltered "I'm sorry, maybe I didn't get your friend's name."
"Oh, no, you got it right" replied Vivio. Her voice grew cold as ice, any pretense of cheerfulness dropped. "It's Fate. As in Fate Testarossa!".
Shiro's smile disappeared in a thin line and stared at her with cold eyes "You don't know what you're talking about, kid. And I don't want to hear that name again, understood?" he said briskly.
"Why? I think Fate Testarossa is a nice name. Don't you think that Fate Testarossa is almost lyrical? Or maybe Fate Testarossa makes you feel guilty? A pity because I'm planning to see Fate Testarossa every day from now on." She taunted.
Shiro straightened his back trying to appear even more imposing, his hands clenched into fist. "That will not happen!" he seethed "I forbid you to meet that woman again!"
"As if!" she scoffed, "I don't give a damn about what you want!" She struggled to keep her anger at bay.
"That's enough!" he growled "You better know your place and do what I say or…"
"OR WHAT!?" yelled Vivio cutting him short "Will you give me an ultimatum too? Reality check, old man. I don't need you or your wretched idea of family. You want me out of your life? I don't care. I have Nanoha-mama and she's worth hundreds of you."
Blinded by rage, Shiro marched toward her, already rising a hand. Vivio didn't flinch, she didn't cower, but looked straight at him in defiance. "Come on, do it! It's the only way you know, right? Forcing yourself on people, spitting on their wishes and their happiness. Do it! Do it! DO IT!"
Hand still hanging mid air, Shiro stopped abruptly like he was the one who got slapped. He hesitated, realizing what he was doing but also befuddled by the child who was openly challenging him, something he wasn't used to.
For her part, Vivio decided that she had wasted enough time with the man. Ignoring him completely, she turned around and walked to the exit. Opening the door, she said over her shoulder "I'm going. I have ten years of catching up with my other mama!" Then, she was gone.
-o-o-o-
Pouring herself another cup of chamomile tea, Fate wondered if she should spike it with a bit of alcohol. Or maybe ditch the tea entirely and keep just the booze. 'Gods, less than one day on Earth and I'm already a mess.' she thought with a trembling sigh. She wasn't naive, she knew that this visit had the potential to throw her into an emotional hell, but still, for it to happen so soon…
Then again, there was nothing she could have done to prevent it. How could she have imagined that the daughter of the last person she wanted to see - and also the one she wanted to see the most - would have come to her without even knowing it. She scoffed bitterly at her own name, "fate" really liked to mess with people's lives.
She was taken out of those spiraling thoughts by a knock on the front door. Fate approached it warily, she wasn't expecting anyone and she had already had her fix of bad surprises for the day. She couldn't restrain a small gasp as she opened it and was faced by the same young girl who just a couple of hours before made sure to let Fate know what a despicable person she was. The worse part was that she fully agreed.
Vivio stood there fidgeting a little and looked at the woman: reddened eyes, running make-up, disheveled hair. She had cried, that was clear, and it was all her fault.
"What?" asked Fate, her voice a little cracked "Come to finish the work? Some more pleasantries to share?" Fate mentally scolded herself, she didn't mean to be so harsh with the girl but she was too tired to hide how much she was hurt.
They stood in silence for a moment. Fate was expecting more insults, her exhausted mind even suggested physical violence. She didn't expect the blond girl to throw herself at her and hug her tightly.
"I'm sorry." It came with a whisper. "I'm sorry. I didn't know anything. I shouldn't have… you didn't deserve anything of what I…" Hiding her head under Fate's chin, Vivio felt the emotionally stressful day finally catching up to her and taking its toll. She shook a little, a faint sob escaping her throat. Tightening her hold on Fate, she could only repeat "I'm sorry."
Fate froze in place, not sure what was going on anymore. Then her motherly instinct kicked in and she hugged the girl back, leaving any explanations for another time. Right now Fate sensed the girl - Vivio, she recalled - desperately needed her to accept her. And deep inside Fate needed it too. Slowly caressing her hair, Fate spoke to her in a hushed tone "Shhht. Don't worry sweetie. It's alright."
From her hiding place, Vivio gave another sob before she could reply "No. it isn't. It's not alright at all," and mentally added, 'But maybe soon it will be.' pouring all her hopes in that single thought.
-o-o-o-
Sitting next to each other on the sofa, with the emotional storm now subsided, they sat in an embarrassed silence sipping on warm tea, both unsure of what to say. Fate was the first to try to break the ice. "Feeling better?" she asked, looking at the younger girl from the corner of her eye.
Vivio scoffed at the question "I should be the one asking that. It doesn't seem like you had a nice day. And it's my fault." she added somberly.
"Ok, stop." replied Fate "I play the self-deprecation game enough for both of us." She took another sip from her cup. "But I'm curious. Of all the houses in Uminari, you choose this one. Can't be just a coincidence, right?"
"Oh, no, not at all." she replied. Then she told her about that day of so many years before, about the unplanned change in their path and how they stopped in front of Fate's house. She decided to overlook her mother's reaction, knowing it wasn't the right time.
Vivio was about to ask her a question when she realized she didn't know how to address her older companion. It was stupid, she was well aware of it, but she couldn't help it. Then again, after such day, stupid was a welcomed change of pace.
'Just Fate is out of the question' she thought. It seemed a little too rude, since they met only that morning. She thought she could go with the japanese customs and call her Fate-san, but quickly discarded that too. While she has been living in Japan since she came to Earth, she'd always found the san honorific a little too cold. The more familiar -chan was ruled out right from the start too. Regardless what she thought about the woman before actually meeting her, it was how her mother called her and to Vivio it always sounded more like a pet name. Now that she knew the whole story, she was even more convinced she'd been right.
Thinking about her mama took her to another more recent memory where Miyuki was telling her that Fate could have been her mother too. She smiled inside 'Well, in that case I know how I would have addressed her, right?' then she actually thought the words. 'Fate-mama…Fate-mama...' she repeated the words in her mind a couple of times, like she was testing them. Too late she realized that her treacherous mouth followed suit, actually saying the words "Fate-mama..." for a moment she tasted how nicely they rolled on her tongue but she was quickly dragged out of her daze when she noticed Fate's head snapping in her direction, eyes wide in surprise and disbelief for what she had just said.
'Oh, shit!' she thought, her mind working fast trying to justify the slipping. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say it. It's just that I was talking with aunt Miyuki, and she said that you two were together… I mean you and my mother, not you and my aunt…. And probably it's the last thing I should have said, because maybe you don't want to hear me talking about it, but-"
A soft giggle from Fate made her stop, then the giggle came again, a little louder and became a small laugh. That soon developed in a full fit of laughter. She tried to regain a little control, but the half-outraged expression that Vivio was now giving her didn't help at all. Finally, she calmed enough to speak again "Sorry!" - giggle - "No really, I'm sorry" - another giggle - "But you were so flustered, and you kept rambling."
Vivio crossed her arms, pouting at the teasing. Of course, that sparked another fit of giggles from Fate. "Oh, come on! You were kinda cute, you know?"
Vivio tried with all her might to keep her pout straight, but - again - her own mouth betrayed her, curled up a little and let out a chuckle that she tried to hide behind a very fake cough.
With the mood considerably lighter, they went back to their tea, finally relaxed enough to actually taste it. Again, it was Fate who broke the silence. "So, you told Miyuki I'm here."
"Humn, yeah. After I ran away, I realized I that I had thrown a tantrum without even knowing why." she blushed a little, still ashamed by her reaction "I thought aunt Miyuki was the safest person to ask." Fate just nodded, still holding the cup in her hands.
Then Vivio took a deep breath, she was about to ask a very delicate question "Actually… there's something I have to ask you." Fate looked at her arching an eyebrow "Yes, well, my aunt told me I have to ask your permission, so... Can I tell my mother I met you?"
Putting down the cup, Fate flopped back with a deep sigh. She had asked herself the same question for weeks. So, she gave Vivio the same answer she had found for herself.
"No." said Fate. Her voice was gentle, but without any trace of doubt "No, I don't think it's a good idea."
Vivio opened her mouth to retort, then snapped it close. One time, two times. She swallowed her words, knowing that letting her mouth run free had already caused enough trouble for the day. In the end, she simply asked "Why?"
Fate gave her a sad smile "I'm sorry Vivio, but I'm not here to stay." she pointed at the room and at the opened boxes scattered all around. And Vivio realized her mistake: she had thought Fate was emptying them, but she was wrong. Fate was filling them.
"I came here only to put the house for sale. I'll leave tomorrow."
Vivio could only stare at her, speechless. It was wrong. Wrong. Things weren't supposed to go like that. She wanted to know Fate better. She wanted to make her meet her mother again. She wanted to make Nanoha… no, not just her. She wanted to make both of them happy. But this chance was slipping out of her hands and she didn't know how to stop it.
Fate was unsure why, but she could see the disappointment on Vivio's face. She too wasn't happy with her decision, but it was the best one. What good would it have done telling Nanoha she was on Earth for just a day and half? Some ghosts were meant to be left resting.
And now it was time to say goodbye to Vivio too, Fate was surprised how hard it was sending the girl away. Probably the reason was that she reminded Fate of Nanoha so much that it hurt. "Come on." she said, trying to sound more confident that she was "You should go home now. It's getting late, Nanoha will worry."
Vivio didn't know how it happened, but she found herself out of the house, with Fate giving her one last hug. Then, the door closed with a click as loud as a thunder. Her heart was screaming her she had stop Fate, but even if she was racking her brain in a frenzy, she couldn't come up with anything. She needed a plan, she needed an idea. She needed help. Stepping away from Fate's door, she took out her phone and hurriedly called her aunt.
Miyuki was still at Cafe Midori-ya, forcing herself to go through the rest of the day. After the fallout, her father disappeared somewhere in the house, probably he went to blow off steam in the dojo, leaving the shop to Miyuki and her mother. And - for that - she was grateful. Finally the last customer of the day payed his bill and went away, Momoko locked the door behind him and they started to clean up without a word.
They were going through the chore in silence when Miyuki's phone went off, the sudden noise resounded so loud in the quiet room that it made both jump. "Hey Vivio… no I'm… What?!... wait a moment." she turned her back to her mother and continued in a lower tone "I don't know, Vivio. I can try to think about something, but…"
Momoko was looking at her daughter with a deep frown. It didn't take her too long to connect the dots, Vivio was asking for something, help she reckoned, and she was sure it was about Fate. 'Well, this isn't working.' she thought and quickly made up her mind.
"Miyuki, what's the matter?" she asked firmly. The girl turned to her with a start, trying to decide if and what she could tell her. After a moment Momoko took the decision from her and snatched the phone from her hands. "Vivio, are you ok?" On the other end of the line Vivio froze. She wasn't sure how Momoko could react if she knew what she was up to. "Yes. Yes. I-I'm ok." she stammered.
"It's about Fate, right?"
Vivio was on the verge of panic, should she tell the truth? Lie? Would her grandmama yell at her? "I… she…"
"Sweetie, stop. Take a breath and start again." she told her, then added in softer tone "I can't help you if you don't tell me what's happening."
Vivio felt her earth burst in relief "It's a disaster, grandmama! Fate… Fate isn't going to stay. She wants to leave tomorrow." Vivio started to pace back and forth in front of the house "I know I shouldn't meddle, but… I just wanted to make them meet. But there's no time! I don't know what to do!"
Momoko quickly considered and discarded dozens of plans. But in the end she had to admit that the answer was rather simple. If they had no time, then they just had to not waste it. "Ok, wait for me there. I'll go pick up your mother."
Momoko threw the phone to Miyuki and went to the retrieve the car keys, but she was immediately faced by her husband. By the deep frown he was sporting, it was clear that he overheard the entire call. "Where do you think you're going, Momoko?" he asked sternly.
She didn't spare him more than a quick glance, picked up the keys and moved toward the exit. "I'm going to do the right thing." she replied over her shoulder.
His anger flared again "Momoko, I warn you. Go through that door and you will not be welcomed in this family anymore!" But as soon as the words went out his mouth, he knew he had made a mistake. She stiffened and turned to face him, her eyes were blazing with rage. "Listen, Momoko…" he tried a little more gently.
"NO!" she shouted at him "I talk! You listen." He snapped his mouth shut and took a step back without even noticing it. "Family!" she seethed. "Family! You keep spewing the word left and right, but you don't even know what it means!" He was going to say something, but Momoko didn't give him any space "Nanoha is family! Vivio is family! Miyuki and Kyoya are family!" her hands clutched in tight fists were trembling. "Without them 'Takamachi' is just a word on a plaque. And you keep pushing them away!" She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, trying to regain a control of herself. Then she spoke again "This ends tonight. I'm going to do whatever I can to fix the damage I let you do ten years ago. You don't like it? I don't care." She was about to turn back, but she stopped and added "If you can't deal with it, there is the door. Go and don't come back!"
Momoko didn't wait for him to reply and went to the garage, already dialing her daughter's number. "Hey, mom." Nanoha greeted.
"Put something on and wait for me outside. I'm already on the way." said Momoko with a commanding voice.
Taken aback by her mother's tone, Nanoha started to worry "Is everything alright? Mom, what happened?" her mind conjuring terrible images, then her greatest fear crept up her spine "It's Vivio? Mom, did something happened to Vivio?"
"Vivio is perfectly fine. Everybody is perfectly fine." then she added "5 minutes, Nanoha." and closed the connection.
True to her words, after just five minutes she stopped in front of her daughter's house. Nanoha hurried to the car and sat in the passenger seat. She didn't have the time to buckle the seatbelt before they were already moving.
Nanoha looked at her mother and was surprised by the look of determination she was showing. "Mom," she tried again "What's happening? You're scaring me." And it was the truth. Despite her mother previous reassurance, something was going on. Something big enough to make her mother act in a way she'd never seen before.
"Don't worry, sweetie." said Momoko but instead of giving her any explanation, she took her phone and dialed Vivio's number. The girl answered at the first ring "Grandmama…" panic and relief where fighting in her voice. "I'm with your mother, Vi. We will be there shortly, wait for us." and closed the communication, fully focused on the driving.
Nanoha's mind was running in circles. Why had her mother called Vivio? Why had she picked her up with such short notice? Was her daughter lost? Injured? And why was her mother refusing to tell her anything?
Lost in her worried mind, Nanoha didn't pay any attention to where they were going. Even when her mother stopped the car and dragged her out she didn't spare a look at her surroundings, so focused she was on the figure of her daughter, who was standing in the middle of a sidewalk, fidgeting and bouncing from one foot to the other.
Nanoha ran to Vivio, hands flying to her daughter's head, shoulders, arms, checking for something, anything that could justify the events of that evening. "Vivio!" she almost yelled "Are you ok? Are you hurt?"
Vivio quickly hugged her mother "I'm fine mom. I'm sorry, I didn't want to worry you."
With Vivio safe and sound in her arms, Nanoha finally felt her fear melting away. Reassured that the worst-case-scenario was not happening, she thought she was ready to face whatever was going on. Never had she been so wrong.
Vivio relished in her mother's embrace for a moment, then grabbed Nanoha's hand and walked briskly toward the house in front of them, dragging the woman behind her. Only then did Nanoha start to take in her surroundings, finding the place familiar. She realized exactly where she was a moment too late. Already standing next to the door, Vivio knocked.
-o-o-o-
Sitting in the living room, Fate was thinking about what could easily be labeled the weirdest day of her life. It had left her with an unpleasant mix of feelings that were pulling her in opposite direction. But more than anything she felt like a blanket of wistfulness was hovering above.
A sharp knock on the main door pulled her out of her melancholic daze. 'Really?' she sighed, something telling her that it was Vivio again. She dragged her feet to the main entrance and opened the door, already saying "What now Vivio? Did you forget… something…" Words dying as soon as she saw who was waiting behind the door. Her brain stopped working while she felt her insides tying in knots and filling with butterflies all at once.
Her mind was able to form just one word. A name. "Nanoha." she whispered, losing herself in the image of the woman she had yearned for so much time.
If Fate was struggling, Nanoha wasn't faring any better. It couldn't be true, even if she was seeing it. Even if she heard her calling her name. She was trying hard to not believe it, to not give in to her wish, because every time she did, then she had to wake up and her heart broke a little more. Still, against any common sense, she raised a hand and slowly, shakily, feather-lightly she touched the cheek of the girl in front of her. It was soft. It was warm. It was real.
"Fate-chan"
The world disappeared. Gone was the street, still busy despite the hour. Gone were the people around them. Even the house ceased to exist. The girls just stood still, lost in each other, trying desperately to find the right thing to say but failing, both scared to break that feeble connection they were feeling.
More than once Vivio had been told that sometimes you have to give fate a little push in order to get things done. 'Best advice ever.' she thought with a grin. Slipping unnoticed behind the blonde, she took it literally and pushed Fate. Right into Nanoha.
Taken by surprise Nanoha raised her hands to Fate's wavering shoulders to steady her. Stumbling forward Fate's hands gripped at Nanoha's upper arms in an effort to prevent herself from knocking them both to the ground.
Still grinning, Vivio mentally complimented herself as she looked at her mother snuggled into Fate who was holding her tightly in her arms. Then the teen-ager took a step back and waited, hoping for the best.
Taking in Nanoha's scent, Fate felt like the world was exploding, almost overwhelmed by colors, music and sensations she didn't even know she had forgotten. For Nanoha, it felt like coming home after a long and tiring trip. She had finally found shelter from the cold air of an endless winter and Fate's warm embrace was whispering "Welcome back."
Fighting back the tears, Nanoha awkwardly swatted Fate with both hands "Stupid Fate-chan!" she choked, a tight knot down her throat "Ten years. Ten years!"
Fate tightened her hold. Hiding her face into auburn tresses and finally managed to whisper "I know. I'm sorry." That was all Nanoha need to lose her battle. Fists grabbing Fate's shirt, she finally let herself crying away years of sadness and frustration.
Momoko looked at them and sniffed, then gestured Vivio who followed her outside to give the girls a little privacy. They sat on the low steps in front of the entrance and remained silent for a while. "What now?" Vivio asked finally.
Momoko released a breath "We did what we could, we gave them a chance. Now, we wait and hope."
Albeit frustrating, Vivio knew that the woman was right. "Tell me about Fate." she asked after a moment.
"What do you want to know?"
Vivio shrugged, leaving her the choice. Momoko smiled as waves of memories flooded her mind. She picked one and started "You know, there was that one time when…"
-o-o-o-
They stayed there for more than an hour, Vivio enraptured by the endless flow of words. Some stories made her laugh, some made her cringe, but they never ceased to amaze her. If anything, she was learning about sides of her mother she had never seen.
But in the end curiosity won over both of them. Vivio motioned with her head toward the door and Momoko silently agreed with a nod. They stood up and tiptoed to the door, spying through the crack they left open. They retreated after a moment, but what they saw left them full of fuzzy feelings. Fate was on the floor, her back against a wall. One arm draped around Nanoha who was sitting sideway on her lap, the other hand playing with the girl's finger. They were talking in whispers, soft smiles lightening their face. Every now and then they shared tender kisses followed by blushing giggles.
"Well," said Vivio "looks… promising."
Momoko smiled with a nod, then linked arms with Vivio as they started to walk to her car. "Better leave them alone, for tonight you can sleep at our house." They sent a short message to Nanoha to inform her of her daughter's whereabouts, then they climbed inside the car and left.
Upon arriving at the Takamachis' house, something caught Momoko's attention and made her frown. A short note was resting on the kitchen table, next to a set of keys. As Momoko picked it up, Vivio could see that there were just two word written: 'He left'. There was no doubt who the note was referring to. And since he didn't take the keys, he probably wouldn't come back.
Vivio was thinking fast to find something to say, but Momoko simply put down the note and without a word guided her to Nanoha's room.
"You can sleep here, sweetie." said Momoko.
"But… grandmama, this is where you…"
Momoko sighed and gave her a sad smile "That doesn't matter anymore, right?"
Unsure of what to do, Vivio just hugged her "Goodnight, grandmama."
Momoko hugged her back, then leaned over and kissed her head. "Sweet dreams, Vivio." she replied before leaving.
An hour later, Vivio was laying on the bed, unable to sleep. The more she thought about it, the more the situation seemed disturbingly familiar. Just the night before she had to hold her mother while she was crying in her sleep. Now she was pretty sure Momoko wasn't feeling any better. With a light curse, she stood and walked down to her grandmother's room. She lingered there just for a second, then opened the door and stepped in, reaching Momoko's side of the bed and looked at her. Vivio couldn't help but mentally curse again, she hated so much when she was right.
"Humm… you know, the bed… it's too… hemm... unfamiliar." she started "So I was thinking that… maybe… I can sleep here?"
Despite everything, Momoko arched a brow at the girl's amusing antics.
"You know… " she continued "like a.. A sleepover." Vivio grimaced at the pathetic excuse.
"A sleepover" deadpanned Momoko.
"Yes?"
Momoko repressed a giggle "Mmmmm, I haven't done a sleepover in years." but she scooted away to let Vivio lie next to her. As soon as she had settled, a mischievous grin formed on Vivio's face 'Ah, well, in for a penny…' then she said "Good night, Momo-chan!"
Momoko looked at her in disbelief for a moment, then started to laugh while the younger girl smirked smugly. 'Leave it to Vivio to brighten the mood.' she thought, but that didn't prevent her to tease back "Good night, Vi-chan." she said as she finally laid back down to the bed. That caused another fit of giggles, this time from both of them.
Vivio last half-coherent thought for the day was at the irony of the situation. It seemed that it was her calling to keep the Takamachi's women safe at night. She wondered when Miyuki's turn would come.
-o-o-o-
The first ray of sun filtered through the window and Fate stirred, still laying on the sofa. As her brain groggily awakened, memories of the night before made her mouth curl in a satisfied smile. Falling asleep with Nanoha in her arms was a treat she hadn't had the chance to taste for too long. She sat up stretching her arms over her head, wondering where the girl went and the smell of freshly brewed coffee quickly answered her question.
Padding through the house, she stopped at the kitchen door and stood in awe at the wonderful display. Barefoot, wearing a loose oversized t-shirt that reached mid thigh - gods only knew where she found it - Nanoha was busying herself cooking their breakfast.
Still in a daze, Fate stepped in and hugged her from behind. Basking in the bliss of that moment, she closed her eyes and murmured "Good morning, Nanoha."
Surprised, she stopped only for a moment, then she pressed her back in the warm embrace and reached down to Fate's hands, covering them with her own. Relishing in the contact, Fate had no doubts: that was the most perfect instant of her whole life. She should have expected it couldn't last.
Suddenly Nanoha stiffened, trying to free herself from Fate's hold. "I-I can't, Fate-chan." she whispered, her voice marred by sadness. She turned around to face the blonde, and even if her mouth was curled in a small smile, her eyes were telling a whole different story.
"Nanoha, what…" tried to ask Fate, but the other was already answering "You're not staying, right?" and motioned with her head toward the counter. Fate looked down and saw the realtor's paperwork she signed yesterday. She cursed under her breath as reality crashed upon her with the force of a runaway train.
For a couple of hours she forgot that the world was still out there, but it came back with a vengeance. Indeed she had planned for that day to just give back the papers and then leave, this time probably forever.
"Listen, Fate-chan. What we had yesterday… It something I know I will cherish, but soon you will not be here anymore. That's why I can't… I can't..." Nanoha wasn't able to find the words, but it didn't matter. Fate understood. She had a lift booked for that afternoon, there was no point in keep hurting themselves, even if it felt so right.
Swallowing a knot, Nanoha forced herself in a smile "Come on, sit. The food is ready, it would be a waste to let it get cold."
Breakfast was a somber affair, neither of them knew what to say, if there was something to say at all. Eating, Fate marveled at how the food tasted like ambrosia and cardboard at the same time. After a while Fate dropped any pretense and pushed her plate away. Head slumped back, she stared at the ceiling like she was hoping to find her answers on it.
She knew that, regardless of any of her own plans, in a short time Nanoha would leave the house, but she refused to let her disappear like that. She desperately wanted to talk to her, but what could she say? How could she hope to explain what she was thinking, what she was feeling and what she thought was the right thing to do? Moreover, would Nanoha listen? Fate looked back to the other side of the table, and her heart shattered,
Nanoha was looking blankly to Fate's discarded dish, a single tear running down her cheek. She knew she was being stupid, that like herself Fate simply couldn't stomach any food right now. But in her frazzled state she couldn't help but thinking that the blonde was rejecting anything from her. Anything of her.
It didn't take long for Fate to realize what Nanoha was thinking, and that made her cringe. It seemed that hurting her was the only think she was able to do, even if she didn't mean to. She made up her mind, she wouldn't waste their time anymore, she would tell her everything and she was going to do it right now. Still unsure about what she was going say, Fate had no doubt about how. 'Just be honest and tell her the truth. If anything, Nanoha deserves it'.
Steeling herself for what was coming Fate took a deep breath and started to speak.
"I was scared." Fate broke the silence between them and Nanoha tiredly lifted her head to look at her, eyes still devoid of any trace of life.
"I was scared before coming here… and now I'm utterly terrified." she lowered her head, unable to look at the other girl "I've been living in a… limbo since-" she had to swallow hard before she could continue "-since the day I left you. Just going through the days, doing things. Surviving. Everybody kept telling me I had to move on, to start again and probably they were right, but… I couldn't. I think I was just punishing myself." she took a sip from her coffee, what she was going to say next still weighing heavily on her. "Then… I had an accident."
For the first time, a spark of something lit Nanoha's gaze. Despite their history, despite the pain she couldn't help but worry. "What happened?" she asked, her voice was subdued but the concern was undeniable.
Fate sighed "I'll tell you the whole story later, if you will still want to hear it. For now, let's just say that I overworked myself and fell during a mission." then she smiled wryly at herself "Does it remind you of someone?"
Nanoha cringed, of course it did. That was exactly what happened to her when she was twelve. She almost died and for a while everyone believed she would never recover… a sudden realization struck her. "Oh my God, Fate!" she nearly yelled, lunging forward "Are you ok?" Any other argument put aside at least for the moment. Fate heart warmed from the undeniable concern in her voice.
That didn't prevent a knot forming in her throat. It'd been awhile since she had come to terms with her condition, but it still hurt.
"I am… healthy." she tried, hoping Nanoha wouldn't pry any further. With no luck.
"Fate…"
She took a trembling breath "I have been... deemed not fit for active duty anymore." Cursing her weakness, she blinked a couple of time to fight back the tears. Then she whispered "I had to retire."
Nanoha gasped at the news. To be an Enforcer had been Fate's dream since she was nine and she fought hard to achieve it. And now she had to let it go and - Nanoha was sure - she was blaming herself for it. She slumped back on her chair "I'm sorry Fate-chan." she said, adding the usual endearment without thinking. The word raised Fate's mood a little.
"Don't worry," continued Fate, "if anything, it has been… enlightening. And in a way it's the reason we are here today." Another sip of coffee gave her a most needed pause. She was getting near the end of her talk, and it terrified her.
"I thought that maybe I should really give it a chance. I mean, to start over." she sighed, there was no easy way to say what followed. Her voice dropped into a pleading tone "Please Nanoha, don't take it in a wrong way, but... I believed you moved on. I needed to know that there was no place for me in your life anymore. That's why the first step I had to make was to cut away any remaining connection to you." she glanced briefly to the paperwork on the counter "You were right. I planned to come back to Earth, put the house for sale and leave as fast as I could." she looked away ashamed of her own actions. "And do anything I could to avoid you."
Nanoha's stricken expression told her volumes on how much she was affected by her words. 'You hurt her again. YOU HURT HER AGAIN!' she yelled at herself 'Vivio was right, you're a monster.' But she knew it had to be done, or Nanoha would never understand.
She didn't wait for Nanoha to ask, she already knew the question: why. "I was afraid of you." The more she was getting close to baring her soul, the more everything was weighing on her. She stood and started to pace the room "What if you hated me? What if you didn't?" she pressed her hands on her head "What if you really did forget about me?"
Fate realized she was about to lose it and she stopped, her breath a little labored. Forcing herself to take her seat again, she added "But more than anything I was scared by myself."
Nanoha knew she shouldn't, but despite how much she was hurt by Fate's words she had to ask. Or - maybe - it was because she was hurt. In a corner of her mind she was still hoping for a reason that would justify her feelings. The alternative was too horrid to even consider.
"I don't understand." she forced herself to ask.
"Three months. I wasted three months mustering the courage to come here." she said looking down at her lap. "I was afraid that if I met you… I thought I had made some progress. I knew that meeting you would have thrown me back to square one." then she raised her head. "You know what's funny? When as I saw you, I realized that I never moved at all. And I don't care."
Fate knew the moment of truth had come. In a second, Nanoha probably would destroy her, but not saying it now would have been even worse.
"Nanoha, I don't want to leave. I don't want to sell this house. I can't go back lying to myself, denying myself. Not after yesterday. Not anymore."
"So what do you want!" Nanoha was almost yelling. "I don't understand you anymore Fate-chan! You left me, you ignored me for ten-damned-years. You came back in secret and you blatantly stated that you didn't want to see me." She knew that she wasn't being fair to her, she knew that their fallout was as much her fault as it was Fate's. And she knew that - if she really had wanted - she could have reached for her anytime. But her emotions were already all over the place and she couldn't stop. Her voice cracked as she continued "But then you held me. You kissed me. You made me feel-" a loud sob stopped her. "I-I can't stand it anymore. Say what you have to say and let me go home."
"I-" Fate staggered. She clenched her hands so tightly that her nails drew blood from her palms. 'Say it, you coward. It can't go worse, so JUST SAY IT!' Then she blurted it out "I want a chance!"
As soon as she let out the word, she saw Nanoha stiffen. She straightened her back and her eyes hardened.
"A chance" she deadpanned.
Fate grimaced at the tone, and instantly she knew she had lost her. "I'm begging you Nanoha, give me another chance. I'll do whatever it takes. I know I don't deserve it, I know I shouldn't have left you, but-"
"After all we went through" Nanoha cut her short, her voice devoid of any emotion "you come here and ask for another chance."
Fate's head dropped, too ashamed to look at her. That was the end of everything, she knew the odds were against her, but she had hoped. To no avail, it seemed. And how could it have gone differently? Nanoha was right, she left, she ignored her, she hurt her. How could she even dared to think Nanoha could want to take her back.
Her self-loathing was suddenly interrupted by the clattering of a falling chair. Nanoha had jumped out of it and now she was half-skidding and half crawling on the table. Fate knew what was coming, and steeled herself for the slap, the punch, whatever way Nanoha was going to hit her.
But Nanoha had something different in mind. She threw herself at Fate, straddling her and locking her legs behind the chair. Arms reached behind the blonde's neck and loose fists started to pound on her back.
"Stupid! Stupid Fate-chan!" She cried "Can't you see you don't have to ask? Can't you see you don't need it?" Fate held tightly, hiding her face into auburn tresses. "I'm sorry" she whispered again and again.
They held onto each other like their lives was depending on it, crying and cleansing from years of sorrow and repressed feelings, until they finally calmed down.
Nanoha was the first to break the silence "I've missed you, Fate-chan."
"I know" she answered with a sigh.
"Fate-chan?"
"Mmm?"
"I love you"
Fate felt her heart swelling "I love you too" she managed to say "I've never stopped". Another tear fell from her eyes. She didn't hate it.
"Fate-chan?"
"Yes?"
"This chair is uncomfortable"
Fate frowned, like she couldn't believe what she heard. Then exploded. She giggled and laughed, and when she thought she had calmed, she laughed again.
Nanoha leaned back a little, to look at her. "Mou, Fate-chan, it's not funny, you know? My legs hurt!" she pouted, eliciting another fit of laughter.
Fate's managed to turn her giggles into a sly smirk "Oh, no! We can't have that, can we, Princess?" She reached with her hands under Nanoha's thighs and stood up from the chair, making her squeak in indignation, nonetheless she grabbed around Fate's neck.
Quickly Fate made her way to the living room and plopped down on the couch. "Here, Princess, does that suits you?"
Of course, Nanoha couldn't let her off the hook so easily "You know, Fate-chan, if you want to cop a feel, you just have to ask."
Fate's jaw slacked off, while a red hue spread from her neck to the tip of her ears "I-I-I… it's not… I didn't mean to… I was-I was..."
Nanoha didn't even try to restrain her laughter, even if she had tried, just one look to the the blonde's face would have been enough to make the effort worthless.
Fate's expression turned to a righteous scolding "You... you… you…."
Nanoha leaned forward, her beaming smile just an inch away from Fate "I.. I.. I..?" She said in cheerfully mocking.
Fate let out a deep breath and bumped their foreheads together, circling her arms around Nanoha's waist. "Gods only know how much I missed this… you… everything."
"I don't know-" she pressed a soft kiss on Fate's lips "-about the gods-" another kiss "-But I know-" kiss "-how much I-" kiss "-missed you."
She reached behind Fate's neck and pulled her, leaning for another kiss. Gone was the playful mood as both felt the need for a more intimate connection. Slowly, tentatively, the kiss deepened, as lips were bitten and tongues started a shy dance. With growing passion their actions became bolder, hands roaming through hair, on legs, under shirts. Breathing became ragged as tongues were battling for dominance that was given and taken back and forth.
Before things could escalate into real intimacy, a yelp from the door caught their attention. "You two, go get a room!" yelled Vivio.
Almost unfazed, they lazily turned their heads to the interloper. Vivio was standing there, ears and cheeks tinted in a fierce red, a hand over her eyes blocking her view.
Nanoha arched a brow and replied coolly "I think we did even better, we got an entire house. Not our fault if you barged in uninvited."
"Again." added Fate in a matter-of-fact tone. Nanoha looked at her with a questioning expression, but she just waved her hand as she was saying 'later'.
"Not that I'm not happy to see you Vivio, but to what do we owe the honor? By the way, you can look, we are decent"
"Yeah, sure" said Vivio, still looking away "Tell that to your bum."
Only then Nanoha realized that the lower hem of her shirt had been lifted up to her waist. She tugged it down and smiled slyly "Fate-chan, you animal!" making her blush head to toe. Then she climbed down from her lap and sit next to the blonde, her left leg still resting over Fate's right knee.
Vivio peeked through her fingers and saw that the view was 'safe' again. Stepping toward the duo she said "Anyway, I brought you breakfast," she gestured with the cardboard box in her hand "And I wouldn't had to come inside unannounced if you were so kind to answer one of my calls."
Nanoha smiled sheepishly, scratching her cheek with a finger "We were… a little busy, ne, Fate-chan?" she elbowed the other, but Fate seemed transfixed, her eyes locked onto the box in Vivio's hand. "Is there a chance those are" she gulped soundly "Cinnamon rolls?"
"Mmmm, yeah, I think so." answered Vivio handing it over. Fate lunged forward and in the blink of an eye the box was resting in her lap opened, one of the sweet treats already in her hands. As Nanoha raised a hand to take one, Fate covered the box with an arm and scooted it away.
"Fate-chan!" scolded her Nanoha. Fate had the grace to look ashamed, but didn't let go of her treasure.
"You don't understand. It's cinnamon rolls! I literally dreamed about them."
"Fate, pass the box." said Nanoha dryly.
"But… cinnamon rolls!" she withstood Nanoah's scowling gaze as long as she could, but in the end she relented and released the box with a whimper.
All the while Vivio watched them, her look shifting from her mother to… her prospective other mother. It amazed her how fast she had come to care for the blonde, but she knew instinctively that Fate was someone she would be happy to have as part of her life. Not to mention her mama's reactions, Fate dragged out a side of Nanoha she hadn't seen before, and it was a good one. Moreover, she seemed happy, and this was all Vivio needed to know.
Still, curiosity was nagging her. "So… hummm... " she started tentatively "I was wondering… I mean, if grandmama asks me - and, you know, she surely will - what should I say? I mean, about… you two?"
Nanoha raised a hand to stop her "Hold your horses, Vivio." she said "Fate-chan and I have still a lot to discuss. There are things we have to-" she stopped abruptly. Fate had lowered her head and was slowly rising her eyes to her. She knew what was going to happen.
"Fate-chan! No, puppy eyes are not allowed!"
Fate's lower lip trembled.
"Fate-chan" she almost pleaded "I said 'no'!"
Fate whined.
"Oh, fuck!" she glomped her, arms tightening around Fate's head and dragged her to her chest. With a growl, she finally said "Tell mom that Fate-chan is MINE!"
Vivio didn't miss Fate's smug smile.
[OMAKE]
Mid-Childa 0085 (Earth 2026)
It was a lazy morning in the Yagami's household. Each member of the family was taking a little time on their own. Hayate had already retired in her study to deal with the mail; Shamal was stubbornly studying a cookbook; Vita was sitting on the floor, trying to bash into submission one of her videogames; Signum was reading the news on a floating holoscreen and Zafira was half asleep in his wolf form.
Everything was quickly forgotten as they heard a scream coming from the study. In the blink of an eye, Signum was already throwing the door open - the others just half step behind her. What they saw was beyond comprehension.
Hayate was jumping all around the room, a beaming smile plastered on her face. "Yes!" she shouted "YesyesyesyesYES!". As she noticed them, she dragged Signum in an impromptu - and uncoordinated - round of waltzing, then she jumped to Shamal, hugged her fiercely and kissed soundly one of her cheeks. Rushing out of the room, she threw herself on Zafira, the poor wolf beast whimpered as she nuzzled into his thick fur. Still unsatisfied, she jumped back on her feet again, grabbed Vita from behind and twirled around. All along, she never stopped laughing.
The Wolkenritters stared bewildered at each other. They were used to their mistress' excesses, but that marked a totally new level of craziness even for her.
Still half dazed - and fully blushing from the embarrassment - Signum leaned on the wall when something caught her attention. Laying forgotten on the floor was an ivory sheet of paper, embossed by an elegant pattern of pink and yellow. She picked it up, and as she read the first lines, she couldn't help but let a rare smile of joy form on her face.
Nanoha Takamachi and Fate T Harlaown
invite you and your family to join them
at the celebration of their wedding...
