I Don't Wanna Spend One More Christmas Without You
Chapter 1: The Warning
It was the annual Christmas party on the Gossip Girl set, and Kelly sat waiting for Matthew to arrive. She wondered if he was going to bring Leyla, his girlfriend of the past year. She really wished he wouldn't.
Kelly sighed, and took another sip of her egg nog. It wasn't that she didn't like Leyla. Leyla was a nice girl. But that was just it. Leyla was a girl—not a woman. Well, technically, she was an adult. But, at twenty-three, Kelly didn't really see her as fully matured. No one was the same person they were at twenty-three. People grew up. They changed. She just didn't think a twenty-three-year-old girl and a forty-one-year-old man had enough in common to really be anything more than good friends. Even then, one was sure to outgrow the other eventually.
She just didn't see them working out. The whole situation bothered her a lot more than it should, she knew.
"Hey, Kelly, come join the party! We miss you," Chase said to her with a smile. He winked at her. "Do you need a refill of that egg nog? Oh, and have you tried the Christmas cookies Leighton made? They are to die for." He looked around, then leaned in closer to her and whispered in her ear. "And I do mean to die for. The poor girl can't cook. I seriously feel sick and I just had one."
Kelly smirked, and shook her head. "I'm good on the egg nog, thanks. And, as for the cookies, they can't be that bad."
Chase held his hands up. "Try one if you must, but believe me, they're pretty bad. The ones Zuzanna made are so much better. I just didn't want to hurt Leighton's feelings, so I told here they're amazing."
"Just don't let her hear you talking like that then" Kelly warned.
Chase pretended to zip his lips with his fingers.
The sound of Leighton's laughter could be heard and she and Blake danced crazily together to Brenda Lee's "Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree".
Chase grinned at Kelly, and extended his hand to her. "Spare me a dance?"
Kelly shook her head. "I'll catch you later, I promise. I just want to sit here for a little bit more and relax. You go have fun though."
Chase looked a little dejected for just a split second, but then the smile quickly returned to his face. He shrugged. "Suit yourself. I'm going to hold you to that promise though." He pointed at Kelly and winked, then headed over to join in on the dance with Leighton and Blake.
Kelly smiled to herself and shook her head. That was a perfect example of too big an age gap. It was no secret Chase had a bit of a crush on her. He had made it known on more than one occasion in interviews.
Sure, it was fun to flirt with him in return, but that was as far as she ever cared for it to go. She saw Chase as a little brother type. He was a good looking guy, for sure. He was only twenty-five though. Her was far too young for her. Soon, he would grow up a little more and realize his little crush on her was just silly. But, he clearly enjoyed hanging around women his own age as well, so she wasn't really worried about it.
She was so busy thinking about Chase that she almost missed Matthew coming in—sans Leyla. She couldn't help but smile a bit. Good. This was a Gossip Girl party, and, not to sound mean, Leyla wasn't a part of Gossip Girl. Kelly loved that Gossip Girl was one thing she and Matthew had together that was theirs and had nothing to do with Leyla. Well, that and Twitter, but she felt compelled to back off of her flirty tweets to him when the media tried to turn it into an affair. She did have some morals left in her.
She didn't want to make Leyla feel bad if she were to see the tweets or hear about them. After all, Leyla was a very nice girl.
Matthew grinned as he spotted her, and walked toward her.
Kelly smiled back, and held out her arms for their usual hug and kisses on the cheek.
"You made it," Kelly said after kissing his cheeks.
Matthew kissed her cheeks in return. "Like I'd miss an opportunity to hang out with you." He winked and smiled.
Kelly couldn't help but grin at this. "So, Leyla won't be joining you?"
Matthew shook his head. "No, unfortunately, she had to work late."
Kelly hid a smirk. Fortunately you mean. She set aside her empty glass, and linked her arm with his. "Well, I guess I'm going to be forced to keep you company then!" She winked at him, then led him off to the dance floor. Hey, she was going to back off when Leyla was around. When she wasn't around to see, however, all bets were off. After all, a little innocent flirting couldn't hurt Leyla if she had no way of finding out about it.
~MK~
Matthew and Kelly had arrived on the dance floor just as the music switched from an up-tempo to a ballad. However, it hadn't seemed to bother Kelly. She draped her arms over his shoulders, and he didn't know what else to do but place his hands around her waist. They swayed back and forth together for a while, just listening to the music without speaking. He had never heard the song before. It was by some boy band—he thought he heard Blake mention something about it being *Nsync. They were singing about not wanting to spend one more Christmas without the one they loved.
Anyway, dancing with Kelly without speaking felt a little awkward to him. But, at the same time, it kind of felt right. He certainly wasn't going to complain about dancing with a beautiful blonde. Kelly looked beautiful tonight in her red satin bubble hem dress that had a black satin ribbon around the waist. The dress barely made it to the middle of her thighs. Her shoes looked to be a black satin. They were peep-toe heels with a thick strap around her ankle that had a big bow on the outer sides. Her perfectly trimmed red toenails could be seen through the peep hole. The red was the same red that was on her fingernails. It matched her dress. Her hair was put up in a sexy chignon. Her makeup was just perfect, and her lips... Well, her lips were a perfect shade of red that matched her dress to a T.
"You look absolutely breathtaking tonight," he told her, breaking their silence.
She smiled at him, and kissed his cheek. "Why, thank you, Matthew. You look pretty handsome yourself," she winked.
Matthew blushed as he looked down at his outfit. "It's not much." He was wearing black dress boots under a grayish pair of bootcut jeans. For his shirt, he had on a short-sleeved red dress shirt underneath an emerald green pullover sweater that had a high, cable knit, V-neck collar.
"It brings out the color in your eyes," Kelly whispered into his ear. She was so close he could feel her breath on his ear, but she wasn't so close that her lips touched it.
He didn't know what to say to that, so he just finished off the dance with her. By now, Kelly had rested her head on his shoulder.
He placed a hand over her back, and gently rubbed her back. He wondered if they were being watched by the rest of the cast and crew. However, he didn't care. The moment just felt right. Kelly was a good friend of his, and he truly cared about her. So what was one slow dance between friends? Besides, the song really was beautiful, even though he didn't usually like this type of music.
When the song ended, he was kind of sad it did.
Kelly was the first to break from him. She smiled at him. "Thanks for the dance."
He nodded politely at her. "Thank you! You're pretty light on your toes." He winked at her.
Kelly grinned, and gently nudged him. "So are you."
Matthew opened his mouth, just about to ask her if she wanted to raid the snack table with him, when Chase interrupted him.
"Hey!" Chase said, coming up behind Kelly, his hands over her eyes. "Guess who?"
Kelly smirked. "Could it be Chase Crawford by any chance?"
"Aw, how'd you guess?" Chase joked. He removed his hands from her eyes, and grabbed her left hand with his right. "You promised me a dance, and since I see you've decided to start dancing instead of sitting around, I want that dance now." He practically yanked her out further onto the dance floor as Mariah Carey's "All I Want For Christmas Is You" began to play.
"Chase, slow down!" Kelly protested with a laugh as she struggled to catch up with him. She looked over her shoulder at Matthew, and mouthed the words, "I'll be back!"
At least, that's what it looked like to Matthew.
Matthew nodded and smiled at her, then went to raid the snack table by himself, wondering why he felt a little resentment toward Chase all the sudden.
~MK~
"Hey, you, did you get something to eat?" Kelly asked, coming up beside Matthew once the next song was over. She hadn't meant to be rude to Chase by just taking off on him like that, but she had given him the dance she had promised.
Matthew swallowed the bit of cookie that was in his mouth then took a long sip of his punch before answering. "I tried a little bit of everything so far. It's all good except for these cookies Leighton made." He made a face and tossed the remainder of the cookie into the trash. "No offense, but someone needs to get that girl a baking lesson."
Kelly smirked. "Chase isn't a fan of them either." She glanced around the room. "You really should have made sure Leighton wasn't looking when you tossed that cookie."
"I didn't throw up," Matthew joked in reference to Kelly having said the phrase "toss that cookie". "Yet," he added.
Kelly rolled her eyes. "You're so mean."
Matthew picked up the plate and offered it to Kelly. He nodded toward her. "All right. You eat one then and tell me you like it. Be honest."
"Fine! I will." Kelly took one of the cookies and took a big, defiant bite. She chewed it quickly at first, but then her chewing slowed.
Matthew smirked. "How is it?"
Kelly crinkled her nose, and forced down the bite she had taken. "Okay, you're right. That's terrible!"
Matthew laughed, and set the tray back down on the table. "See? I told you."
"Well, I'm not going to be rude and toss the rest nevertheless." Kelly put the remainder of the cookie into her mouth and swallowed it down. "Ugh!" she groaned, grabbing a plastic up and filling it to the brim with punch. She took a big, long drink if it.
"Better?" Matthew asked, once she had swallowed her massive sip.
Kelly licked her lips. "Much! Well, I'm not that great of a cook either, so I really can't judge Leighton."
"There's a difference between cooking and baking. Surely you can at least bake?" Matthew asked.
"Maybe better than cooking, but it's still not good. I burned many batches of cookies in my life." She took another sip of her punch. "Anything good here to eat?" Kelly asked, looking over the food table then.
"Well, like I said, it's all good," Matthew reminded her. "In fact, I think I'll have more."
They both filled their plates up with food, then Matthew nodded over to the couch. "Come on, let's go sit down at eat this."
So, Kelly followed him, and they sat down on the couch and ate their food while enjoying good conversation. They talked about their kids, and then about what they were going to do for the holidays.
"The children and I will be spending it in LA with my parents and brother, as usual," Kelly said.
Matthew grinned. "Is your mother going to have that psychic again?"
Kelly nodded. "Yes, she will."
"Is she going to predict what presents everyone got before they're opened?" he asked; clearly amused.
Kelly playfully pushed him. "Oh, stop! It' a tradition. I don't fully believe in all that psychic stuff, but it's fun, and it makes my mother happy, so why not? The psychic always predicts good things like a happy and healthy upcoming year, so it makes us all feel good regardless."
Matthew smiled at her. "I know. I just like teasing you." He winked.
Kelly smirked. "So, what about you, Mr. Comedian. What are you going to do?"
"Well, my parents are coming down. It will be their first time meeting Leyla, so it will be an interesting Christmas for sure."
Kelly felt her stomach drop a little at that. "So, it's getting serious between you and Leyla, is it?"
"Well, we've been dating for about a year. It's only natural for my parents to meet her. Also, I haven't seen them for Christmas in a while since they usually alternate between which family member to spend Christmas with, so it will be nice to have them this year. Besides, I've already met Leyla's parents, so the next step was for her to meet mine," Matthew explained.
"And what would the next step be after she's met your parents?" Kelly asked.
Matthew chuckled. "We're just taking things one step at a time. I never like to look too far ahead. Things change. You know the old saying, tell God your plans and He will laugh."
Kelly grinned. "Very true." She was glad he hadn't mentioned the M word at least.
~MK~
They ate in silence for a bit until Matthew broke the silence. "I'm going to miss you. I hope Christmas breaks goes by fast." He just felt the need to say it. He really was going to miss Kelly. Heck, they had wrapped up filming for the holidays, so he couldn't even see her at work until January.
Kelly paused from eating, and smiled at him. "I'm going to miss you too."
"Maybe we can get together before you head back to LA?" he suggested.
"Just the two of us?" Kelly asked. "Nothing against Leyla, but sometimes I start to feel like a third wheel when she comes with us."
He nodded. "Sure, I understand. And, I agree. Sometimes it's nice to just be together just the two of us to talk about stuff that doesn't really involve Leyla." He winked.
Kelly nodded, a grin on her face. "Exactly!"
Matthew grinned too. "We can go when she's working, so she doesn't feel left out."
Kelly nodded. "Sounds like a plan."
"I'm free tomorrow. Are you?" he asked.
Kelly nodded. "Actually, I am."
"Leyla works during the day tomorrow, so do you want to meet for lunch at Bottega Del Vino?" Matthew asked.
Kelly smiled. "I'd like that. "Noon?"
He nodded. "Perfect! I'll meet you there."
"I'll be looking forward to it," Kelly said.
Matthew nodded and smiled. "Me too. Well, I'm full. I've had the finger sandwiches, the pizza, the wings, the chips, the dips, the brownies, and the cookies. If I eat anymore, I'll burst," he said, setting his empty plate aside.
Kelly sighed as she looked at her now empty plate. "Yeah, me too. I'm going to have to find the time to work all of this off!" She set her empty plate aside, then pat her stomach for emphasis.
"Oh, please! You don't need to lose a single pound. You're beautiful just the way you are," Matthew said, his eyes locked with Kelly's.
Kelly blushed. "Thank you."
"I'm the one who's gonna have to work it off. Unlike you, I get a little tubby," Matthew pat his own stomach.
Kelly laughed. "You're not tubby!"
Matthew raised his eyebrows. "If I keep eating like this I will be."
Kelly removed some hair from his eyes. "Well, your sexy no matter what. And, when you did have a little pudge, I found it adorable."
Matthew blushed. "So you noticed I was pudgy."
"I noticed you were sexy and adorable," Kelly corrected.
Matthew looked away, blushing a bit. It confused him whenever Kelly said things like that to him. It was as if she liked him as more than just a friend. Another thing that confused him was how his heart pounded and his stomach flip-flopped whenever she said those kind of things to him. He supposed it just felt good to have a beautiful woman compliment him—especially one who was his friend.
He looked back at Kelly. "Care to dance again?"
Kelly smiled. "Sure."
So, he helped her up off the couch, and led her out onto the dance floor. The song playing was an uptempo this time—Britney Spears' "Santa, Can You Hear Me?". He didn't know who picked out the song selection, but he was guessing it was Blake or Leighton. They loved their pop music. It was either them or the niece of their head writer, Josh.
Kelly laughed as he twirled her around just for fun.
He couldn't help but laugh right along with her. He loved her laugh—it was contagious.
He even dipped her at the end, and her whole face lit up with her smile. Her smile was just as beautiful as her laugh, he noticed.
"Uh, oh. You guys are under the mistletoe. You're gonna have to kiss! It's Christmas tradition," Penn said.
"Oo, yeah! Come on, you guys gotta kiss," Taylor said with a wink.
Kelly blushed. "I guess we have to since it's tradition," she said with a wink and a smile.
Matthew nodded. "Since it's tradition," he agreed. Though, deep down, he had always wondered what it would be like to kiss Kelly out of character. Would it be the same as Rufus kissing Lily? Or would it be so much better? He didn't have time to think, for Kelly pulled him into the kiss.
Matthew sighed against her lips. It really was so much better than it was when they were in character.
Kelly broke the kiss, and he opened his eyes, smiling at her. His smile quickly faltered, however, when he saw his girlfriend standing only about a foot away, her arms crossed over her chest, and her foot tapping on the floor. And, judging from the expression on her face, she was none too pleased.
Oh, crap! he thought.
~MK~
Kelly looked behind her to see what had made Matthew suddenly turn white as a sheet. Her heart sank when she saw that it was Leyla. So much for the giddy high the kiss had given her. She had felt something when she kissed Matthew. It was stronger than she had imagined it would be, the feeling. She always knew she had a crush on Matthew, but she didn't know to what extent. Now she knew she felt more for Matthew than she had even known she felt. She knew Matthew had kissed her back. There was no doubt in her mind.
"Leyla, hey, Baby! I'm sorry. We were caught under the mistletoe, and the cast egged us on to kiss. It was just a stupid joke," Matthew quickly explained, practically sprinting over to his girlfriend. He kissed her. "Mm, that's much more like it."
Kelly felt as if she had just been stabbed. She knew Matthew had a girlfriend. It was just easy to forget that whenever Leyla wasn't around. There was also the fact that he had kissed her back. She knew Matthew had feelings for her too. Some days she was sure he was ready to profess his love to her. Then, other days, he was all over Leyla, like he was now.
She looked away as Matthew and Leyla continued to kiss.
Matthew usually wasn't so public when it came to his affections.
Leyla smiled. "It's okay. I'll admit, I was angry at first. I mean, I walked in on my boyfriend kissing his costar out of character."
"What else were you supposed to think?" Matthew asked.
Leyla grinned at him. "I completely trust you."
Matthew smiled. "Good!" They kissed again. "See? We don't even need mistletoe," he told her.
She giggled.
Kelly felt her stomach start to churn. She didn't know if it was the sight before her or Leighton's cookie, but she was betting on the first part.
Come on, Kelly. Get ahold of yourself! You've said yourself you do it so much at work, you don't need to do it off set, her mind reminded her.
Yeah, well, that was when I had a boyfriend and wasn't anywhere near Matthew, she shot back in her mind. Now that she was single again, and reminded of how much she adored Matthew, it hurt. It hurt like a knife to the heart.
"Hello, Kelly. Sorry about the brief thought I had of ripping your hair out by the roots," Leyla joked, coming up to her.
Kelly turned to face her, and put on her best smile. It was a good thing she acted professionally for a living, because the very last thing she felt like doing now was smiling. "It's all right. I'd feel the same way if I were in your position." Violent much? she thought bitterly to herself.
"Yeah, the idea of me liking Kelly in that way is preposterous!" Matthew said with a laugh.
Okay, now Kelly was getting more ticked off then sad. "So you were lying when you called me beautiful?" She hadn't meant to say it. It just sort of came out in her annoyance.
Matthew blushed. "Just because I find you beautiful doesn't mean I want to have some secret affair with you. We're just friends. You know that."
"Of course," Kelly said with a smile, not wanting to really get into an argument over it. It was what it was. Matthew had a girlfriend. Besides, she didn't want to lose his friendship over some stupid, meaningless fight.
Leyla looked up at her boyfriend. "You told her she's beautiful?"
Matthew nodded. "Yes, because she is."
Kelly smiled; feeling a little better now.
And then he went and ruined it. "But you're young and beautiful!"
Kelly gasped. "You're only ten months younger than I am! If I'm old, then so are you."
"I didn't mean it that way, Kelly," Matthew said cooly.
"You know what? I'm not feeling very well. I'm going to head out now. Goodbye, Matthew. Goodbye, Leyla." And with that, Kelly turned on her heel, grabbed her coat, and left. She just couldn't get herself to hang around Matthew and his girlfriend a second longer! It made her too sick.
~MK~
Matthew wondered what had gotten Kelly so upset. She was clearly upset.
He sighed. He guessed maybe he was a little rude. He was just trying so badly to cover up the fact that he had enjoyed the kiss. He didn't want to lose Leyla. He really cared about her. She made him feel young and youthful. He feared the day he started to really look old. He figured this way, with a young, pretty girl on his arm, he'd looked good no matter how he looked. Not that he was just using Leyla. He wasn't. He really did love her. She got his jokes and loved to go all the same places he liked to go. They were a good match.
Still, he knew he probably shouldn't have been so rude to Kelly. He didn't mean to imply that she was old. In fact, she was a million times more beautiful then most women her age. But, of course he couldn't let Leyla find out how he felt about Kelly. There was no use in making her worry over nothing.
"So, what are you doing here? Not that I'm not thrilled to see you." He kissed her. "I just thought you had to work late."
Leyla grinned. "My manager said I could go early. He knew I was wishing I was able to come to the party."
"Well, I'm glad he let you come! I'll have to thank him later." He kissed her lips, then nodded toward the door. "What do you say we get out of here early, hm? We can go back to my place, and..."
She grinned "Say no more. Did you do the gift exchange already?"
"As you know, Kelly and I got each other's name. But, she stormed off before we got to exchange. I'll just take both gifts and bring them to her tomorrow."
Leyla raised an eyebrow. "Tomorrow?"
He blushed. He hadn't planned on telling her. It just kind of slipped. "We're getting together for lunch since it will probably be our last time seeing each other before she goes back to LA."
Leyla nodded. "I see. I think she should get back together with Jason. They were kind of cute together."
Matthew snorted. "He looked old enough to be her grandfather."
Leyla playfully hit him. "Oh, stop, he did not!"
Matthew placed an arm around her and grinned. He kissed the top of her head. Jason bugged him. He didn't know why since he had never met the guy before, but the fact remained, he felt Kelly could do better. Like with me. He shook the thought from his head, having no idea where it had come from. "Just let me grab our coats."
"Chase, there is a whole other plate of those cookies I made that you said you loved so much. Here." Leighton handed a sick looking Chase the extra paper plate filled with cookies and covered in cellophane. She grinned. "No one else even gave me a single compliment on them, so I decided to give them all to you."
"Thanks, Leighton," Chase said, putting on an obviously fake smile.
"No problem!" Leighton said with a grin. "You look a little sick. You should take some Airborne before you come down with anything." She pat his shoulder. "It is flu and cold season after all." She then skipped off to talk with Ed.
"No, I just have to avoid eating any more of these cookies," he mumbled under his breath once she was out of earshot.
Matthew grinned, and shook his head as he helped Leyla with her coat. "Poor sap."
"What? They're bad?" Leyla asked as he got his own coat on.
"You have no idea," he said with his arm around her. He began to lead her out of the building.
"Wait. Aren't you going to say goodbye?" Leyla asked.
Matthew shook his head. "I want to get out of here before Leighton shows up with a third plate of those cookies."
Leyla laughed, and they left the building and hailed a cab.
Matthew was just eager to get home and leave the whole party behind him. Well, except for the first half of it. That, he had liked. He'd never tell Leyla that though. What she didn't know about, wouldn't hurt her, and what she did know, could.
~MK~
The next day, Kelly waited just inside the restaurant for Matthew. She looked at her watch. It was two minutes after noon. She wondered if he was even going to show.
She felt kind of badly for over reacting the night before. She hadn't even said goodbye to the rest of the cast. She had received calls from Blake, Leighton, Taylor, and Chase, all asking if she were all right. It felt good to be cared about. She had kindly assured them that she was fine, and just had a migraine.
It wasn't the casts' faults or even Matthew's fault for that matter. She had just been caught up in that kiss, a kiss that really was only because there was mistletoe. Her crush was just a stupid crush. Matthew had a girlfriend and had done nothing wrong. He surely wouldn't have said the things he had, had he known she had feelings for him. As far as he knew, she thought of him as just a friend just as he thought of her as just a friend. Her heart kind of sank a little at the thought of him thinking of her as just a friend.
Then again, he had kissed her back. Unless, she has just imagined things—saw what she wanted to see.
She didn't have time to ponder it for any longer, for in came Matthew. He stomped the snow off his shoes and onto the doormat, then headed over to her with a smile.
She smiled too. He was smiling. That must mean he wasn't angry about the night before.
They hugged, and kissed the other's cheek.
"I'm sorry!" they said in unison. They both grinned. "No, I'm sorry!" Again in unison.
"I see the rest of your party has arrived," the manager, said to Kelly with a grin; interrupting them. He nodded at Matthew, who was a regular there. Everyone who worked there knew him. "Hello, Matt. How are you?"
"I'm well, thank you." Matthew said, a polite nod back.
"Right this way. I'll set you two up with your favorite table," the host then said to him.
Matthew smiled, and nodded again, this time in thanks. "I appreciate it, Jason, thank you."
Matthew held out a hand to motion Kelly on ahead of them.
Kelly grinned. "Thank you, Matthew!"
She followed close behind Jason, the manager, relieved that she and Matthew were still on good terms. After all, the more she thought of their fight the night before, the more embarrassed she be game. The fight seemed so pointless and childish now.
When they were seated, the gave their drink orders, then the manager took off to get them their drinks.
"It's so cold out there. I'm glad it's nice and warm in here," Kelly said, hanging her coat over the back of her chair.
Matthew nodded. "Yeah, they always have it the perfect temperature in here."
She nodded, unable to meet his gaze. She was starting to get embarrassed again. They were both avoiding talking about their fight any further.
He sighed. "Look, Kel, I really am sorry about last night. I just didn't want Leyla to worry about our kiss," he said, as if reading her thoughts.
Kelly nodded; able to look up at him now that he had spoken about it first. "I know. It's not exactly something a girl wants to see—her boyfriend kissing another woman—whether it be under the mistletoe or not."
He took her hand. "Well, I should have handled it a little better. I shouldn't have said the things I did."
Jason the manager came back with their drinks then, and Matthew quickly pulled his hand back, so fast it looked as if his hand had been shocked.
"So, have you decided what you would like to eat?" Jason the manager asked with a smile.
"Matthew blushed. "I'm sorry, Jason, we didn't get to looking at our menus just yet."
Jason the manager grinned. "It's quite all right, Matt. I will return in a few minutes and give you two time to decide."
Matthew nodded at him. "Thank you."
"You sure pulled your hand away quick. Are you afraid of being seen with me?" Kelly asked with a smirk as she looked over her menu. She let it come out as a joke, but it was more to get her point across than anything.
He blushed again. "I'm sorry. I just don't want people getting the wrong idea. You know how people talk," Matthew explained.
Kelly sighed. "I know. It's just, sometimes you act like it would be so horrible to date me."
Matthew put his menu down, and raised an eyebrow. "How do you get that from me pulling my hand away?"
Kelly sighed; exasperated. "It's not just that, Matthew, it's you implying that I'm just so old, that the idea is so preposterous, as you called it, that you would ever date me. Now, you pull your hand away like you've been bitten just because your little friend stopped by to give us our drinks!"
"Why do you care anyway? You don't want to date me. You said yourself we do it so much at work we don't need to do it outside of work," Matthew snapped.
"Well, maybe I changed my mind!" Kelly said. She quickly covered her mouth as soon as she had said it. She hadn't meant to say that. It had just slipped. She sighed. Well, it was out there. She dared to glance at Matthew. So now what?
~MK~
"So, you're saying you want to date me?" Matthew wouldn't have believed it, had he not heard it with his own ears.
Kelly shrugged. "I don't know. I've definitely thought about it."
"Well, I do have a girlfriend that I love very much. You realize that, don't you?" he asked.
Kelly rolled her eyes. "How could I forget? She's the one who is not only beautiful but young as well."
Matthew sighed, and threw his hands into the air in exasperation. "Oh will you get off that? I thought we agreed to move past that. I didn't mean it that way, all right?"
"Well, excuse me for not liking to be called old!" Kelly said her arms crossed over her chest. "Really, Matthew, how did you mean it then if you didn't mean I'm old and Leyla's young?"
He shook his head. "You can't take it personally. I prefer younger girls, all right? I'm sure you have something that you prefer."
"Yeah, guys my own age," Kelly quipped.
Matthew was getting annoyed now. This was getting ridiculous. "I act immature for my age, so I like girls that are a little younger. Is that so wrong?"
"You like girls practically still in college. What next? Girls fresh out of diapers?" Kelly snapped.
Matthew slammed his hand on the table. She had gone too far. He was hurt, and he wanted to hurt her in return. "At least I can get someone. Maybe if you were a little younger, you'd have your own boyfriend—one that doesn't only last two and a half months—then you could leave me the hell alone!"
Kelly's mouth dropped open.
Matthew was encouraged, so he kept going. "She's real good in bed too. You're probably too old to be able to do much in bed anymore. Heck, maybe that's why you and Jason aren't together anymore. He dumped you because you suck in bed."
For a moment, Kelly looked like she was about to cry.
Matthew suddenly felt horrible. He hated to see a woman cry—especially when it was he who made her cry. And especially when it was Kelly whom he made cry. "Kel, I—"
But Kelly cut him off. She stood up. "You know what? You're right. You are immature. But everyone has to grow up sometime, and I think it's way past time for you to grow up. Eventually, you're going to have to grow up whether you like it or not. I would think you would have by now, having a daughter and all. And, not that it's any of your business, but Jason and I broke up because I'm traveling all the time, and, the main reason, I want to be there for my children. They are young, and they need my full attention. At least I let my children be my top priority. I don't make my top priority sex, and looking good by having a trophy on my arm. No wonder Naama left you! In fact, I'm surprised she even hooked up with you to begin with. Enjoy your lunch. I'm no longer hungry." She turned to leave, but then came back, and slammed her hands on the table. "And, for the record, I happen to be incredible in bed. Unfortunately for you, you'll never know how incredible. "See you on set when I return. Have a nice holiday with your precious, young Leyla."
And with that, Kelly turned on her heel and left the restaurant.
"Will you still be eating here?" the manager asked, having come over once Kelly was gone.
"Yes, I will be." Matthew said, so angry with Kelly right now, he wanted to break something. He gave his order to his friend. "I'll have another wine too, please," he said. If he ever needed a drink before, now was the time he needed one the most.
~MK~
Kelly was so upset, she was shaking. She knew she had said some pretty horrible things to Matthew, but he had said some pretty horrible things to her first!
She sighed. How did she and Matthew even get into this mess? The used to adore each other. They used to be such good friends. Then she had to go and fall for him. Now, things had been said, and she didn't know if she and Matthew could ever go back to the way they were again.
"Welcome home, Mommy," Hermés said to her once she arrived back at her apartment.
She smiled, and hugged her son as he ran to her. "Hello, my little Darling!"
They hugged and kissed each other.
"Well, you're home early," the nanny said with a smile.
Kelly nodded. "Lunch didn't go quite as planned. I didn't end up having any."
"Well, Helena's down for a nap, and I was just about to make Hermés a sandwich. Would you like me to make you one too?" the nanny asked.
Kelly smiled. "I'd like that, please. Thank you."
"Not a problem," the nanny said, heading into the kitchen.
Kelly sighed, and plopped herself down onto the couch.
Hermés quickly climbed into her lap. "I missed you, Mommy."
Kelly smiled, feeling her heart melt. "I missed you too, My darling."
She sighed. "Who cared about what Matthew said? Who cared if he thought she was old and bad in bed? It didn't matter what he thought. She was a good person, and she loved her children. She provided for them. Her children loved her and her family loved her, and that was certainly all that mattered. What Matthew thought of her didn't mean a thing.
She sighed. If that were true, then why did it hurt so much?
She held her son closer, and kissed the top of his head.
~MK~
Matthew was still so angry he could shoot something, and it was three days later. He hadn't called Kelly to apologize, and neither had she called him. There was no twittering, emailing, or texting between them either. He knew she was probably back in LA by now. Good! As far as he was concerned, she could stay there.
He pulled his jacket closer around him. Everything ticked him off lately. Even this stupid, cold, winter weather. And the snow? The snow really bugged him.
Had he not wanted to get a last minute Christmas present for Leyla, he wouldn't even be on these damn streets.
He thought of the gift he had gotten Kelly. It was a new Hermés bag that he had gotten through a connection of his. She had wanted it so badly, but it had been sold out before she had gotten a chance to get it. He had a friend in Europe get it for him. His friend had found it at a Hermés store near where she lived, and got it for him. Matthew had wired said friend the money, and his friend had sent him the purse.
Now, he wished he had never spent the money on Kelly. He hadn't opened the gift she had got for him, but he planned on giving it back to her once he saw her again. He wanted nothing to do with her or her present. He would act out his scenes with her at work, but that was all. He was so done with her.
He passed by the Alice + Olivia store, and it reminded him of how they both loved that designer; how they'd go to all the Alice + Olivia shows together to see the new line.
He gripped the Louis Vuitton bag handles in his hand tighter, and stepped off the curb. He wanted to cross the road and get the heck away from the Alice + Olivia store, and anything else that reminded him of Kelly.
Unfortunately, in his haste, he forgot to watch for cars.
A taxi beeped loudly, and he looked over, but it was too late. The taxi hit him.
He felt himself being thrown across the street, he heard the screams, and he felt the pain. Then, all went back.
~MK~
Kelly sighed and she sat by the window at her mother's house, peering out into the night. Usually, she loved seeing all the neighbors' Christmas lights. Though, today, it did nothing to cheer her up. She missed Matthew, and she hated that they had left it the way they had. But he hadn't apologized to her, and that made her too angry to call, text, email, or even tweet him. Let him make the first move, she thought. Why should it always have to be her?"
"You know, if you miss him that much, you can always be the bigger person and just call him," her mother said, coming over with a steaming mug of hot chocolate piled to the top with marshmallows and whipped cream, just as she used to make it for Kelly when she was a kid.
Kelly smiled up at her and took the mug. "Thanks, Mom. But, if he's not going to apologize, then why should I? I'm tied of being the victim," she said, thinking of her ex-husband, Daniel, who was an emotionally abusive control freak.
Anne, Kelly's mother, stroked Kelly's hair. "I understand. Good for you! You're right. Then man should always come crawling back to the woman."
They grinned at each other.
Kelly leaned her head against her mother. "Thanks, Mom. You always know how to cheer me up."
Anne smiled, then kissed the top of her head. "I'm your mother; it's my job." She winked, then left to give Kelly some more time to think.
Kelly sighed, and continued to look out at the lights.
She sipped her hot chocolate, and then licked the whipped cream off her lips. There was no way she was going to make the first move. And so she ignored the nagging feeling inside her to call Matthew.
~MK~
Matthew woke up with a groan. He was so cold, so incredibly cold. He had a throbbing headache, and the rest of his body ached as well.
He could see flashing lights in red and blue. He heard so many noises, between walkie-talkies, people shouting incoherent things, and dogs barking. Then, he saw such a bright light, he had to shade his eyes. It was making his head hurt worse. Then, all the sounds stopped. He couldn't hear a thing. Then he started to panic, thinking he had just gone deaf.
Then, the light dinned to a more tolerable wattage, and he heard a single voice, that sounded very much like Penn's. "See what you got yourself into for being such a hard headed idiot?"
"Huh?" Matthew asked; confused.
"Sit up!" the voice ordered.
"But I don't feel good," Matthew whined.
"Get up!" the voice barked, louder this time.
With a sigh, and great effort, Matthew sat up. He saw police, a cab, a cab driver, and a couple of passerbyers—some with dogs—all standing by, most of them staring at him. The only thing was, they were frozen in place, and not a single sound could be heard other than his own voice and..." Matthew looked to his left where the sound of the other voice had been coming from. Sure enough, it was none other than Pen Badgley himself. "Penn, what the hell is going on here?"
Penn smirked. "I'm not Penn. I just made myself look like him to bring you some peace."
Matthew laughed. "Yeah, right! Then who are you? The boogey man?"
Penn smirked. "Don't concern yourself with who or what I am. I'm not who you need to worry about."
"Penn, you're not making any sense at all. Help me up, would you?" Matthew asked, extending a hand to him.
Penn ignored him. "Tonight, you will be visited by three spirits. One will come at ten, one will come at eleven, and one will come at midnight. You've been put in this position so that you can be taught a lesson. You've gotten to be a miserable person, and it's time you saw the error of your ways."
Matthew snorted. "Three spirits? The error of my ways? What is this, A Christmas Carol?"
Penn showed no emotion. "Call it what you want. You were hit by a taxi because of your wrathful, sinful nature. Now, you shall be taught your lessons. It's almost eleven. I must be going now."
"Whatever," Matthew scoffed. "You're just playing a stupid prank of me."
Penn sighed. "If I were actually Penn Badgley just playing a prank on you, then how could I mute the city area and freeze everyone in place? Hm?"
"I must be dreaming," Matthew said. "I must have hit my head hard. I'm delusional." He paled. "Or dead. Am I in Heaven?"
Penn laughed. "Delusional, you are. Dead, you are not. And, the way you've been acting lately, I'm not so sure about the Heaven part. Goodbye, Matthew, and good luck!" He snapped his fingers and was gone just like that. The area remained silent, and the people remained frozen.
"What the hell?" Matthew asked.
Suddenly, pain shot through his head like a lightning bolt.
He groaned loudly, then passed out, falling to the ground, out cold before he could ponder any longer the strange occurrence he had just witnessed.