Disclaimer: Nope, Gate 7 still not mine.
After long hours of thought, Masamune figured out why that idiot with the glasses was a threat to his relationship with Hana. It wasn't like it was because of his personality, after all. There was only one thing it could be.
He could cook. Even Masamune had to admit he was a fairly decent cook. And with Hana's love for noodles, a man who could prepare them well was a necessity.
Well, Masamune could deal with that. He could cook too. In the Warring States era Masamune Date had been famous for being a quirky warlord who loved to cook for people. All he needed to do was brush up on his skills and make sure he could make better noodle dishes than Chika-whatever. Then Hana would dump that loser in a second, and Masamune would no longer have to think about him.
With that in mind, Masamune began to search out cookbooks. School wasn't important, not for him, so he pored over recipes in class instead of studying math or history.
He was pleased to see that none of the recipes he found looked particularly hard. The next step was easy enough. He returned home after school and announced grandly to Kojyuuroh that he would be cooking dinner that night.
"Are you sure?" Kojyuuroh asked. "You haven't–"
Masamune glared at him. "I can cook," he informed his retainer. "Have you forgotten who i am?"
Kojyuuroh had no choice but to give in and surrender the kitchen to his young lord. He did insist on supervising as the boy assembled his ingredients, but he only had to shout the occasional bit of advice: "Wait for it to boil first!" or "Not the whole thing!" Masamune was proud of his achievement.
The meal was a disaster. The noodles were crunchy and chewy at the same time. The sauce was too spicy, and strangely lumpy in places. Or watery, depending on which bite you had taken.
After a few bites, Kojyuuroh put his chopsticks down. "Masamune-sama . . . "
Masamune was fuming. "Eat it!" He pointed his own chopsticks, holding a mouthful of noodles, at his vassal. "Eat it and be grateful!"
Kojyuuroh forced himself to take another bite. After he had swallowed, he said, "Perhaps you should try something easier first. Maybe some fried eggs . . .?"
Masamune's glare could have fried an egg all on its own. "Fried eggs? Why should i waste my time with fried eggs?"
Kojyuuroh wisely didn't pursue the subject. Masamune did, however, look for some simpler noodle recipes to practice, after forcing himself to finish every last bite of that evening's dish.
This wasn't right. He could cook, he knew it. He was just out of practice. A lot of the best noodle recipes hadn't been around in the Warring States period, either. That was why it had gone wrong. He needed a new plan.
On the way to one of his many, many visits to Hana, Masamune had another idea. It would shame him, but there was no way he'd fail using this technique, and if he played it right, no one would even realize what he was doing. He made up his mind. The boy would do it.
Seeing the object of his affections, though, almost drove all thoughts of scheming out of his head. "Hanaaaaa!" the boy squealed, glomping his blank-faced crush.
Hana hugged him back. "Masamune, hello."
"Helloooooooooo~!"
He could hear Kojyuuroh saying the usual polite words off to one side, but he ignored them. Why should he pay attention to Kojyuuroh when Hana was right here? Besides, Kojyuuroh always said more or less the same thing when they came visiting. He'd apologize for Masamune's rambunctiousness, and offer the ura-shichiken residents their gift, which was . . .
"Uumen!" Hana cheered. With a jolt Masamune remembered his plan. Now was the time to put it into action.
Hana trailed along eagerly after that guy as he took the noodles to the kitchen to cook. Now was usually the time when the grade-schooler snagged Hana for some high-quality bonding time without the loser to get in their way, but today he followed as well.
Chikahito found it surprisingly hard to concentrate on cooking with the former warlord looming in a corner of the kitchen – despite the fact that, as a grade-schooler, Masamune shouldn't be able to loom at all. He fumbled the package of noodles and dropped it on the counter.
Masamune scoffed. "I thought you were supposed to be this great cook! What, you can't even hold your ingredients?"
"I can!" The loser was defensive. Masamune grinned a little at the small victory. "Why don't you wait in the other room like you usually do?" Chikahito tried.
"What, do you own the place?" Masamune asked disdainfully. "My kitten wants to watch you make the uumen. Do you have a problem with that?"
"Well, no, but . . . "
"Then be quiet and cook!" Masamune ordered.
"Uh, right."
Hana watched eagerly as Chikahito performed each step, anticipating the meal. (Maybe performed was the wrong word, given his obvious nerves.) Masamune, his arms around Hana, watched just as closely. Know thine enemy. When the noodles were ready, he swept Hana out of the kitchen to join the others at the table without a backward glance. There were more important things than that guy that Masamune could be thinking about. Hana, for example. He had no need to bother with anyone else.
On the way home, he mulled over the experience. He had learned several important things, including the fact that that glasses-wearing idiot was a little bit afraid of him. Well, maybe he wasn't such a fool after all.
His next meal came out much better, although in Masamune's opinion he couldn't serve it to Hana yet. It was good enough for himself and Kojyuuroh, but Hana deserved only the very best, and that was what the grade-schooler intended to give. He kept trying.
One day, Masamune decided he finally had it right. He couldn't wait to share his newly rediscovered talent with Hana. But first, he had to check one more time with his test subject.
The boy thumped a bowl down in front of his aide, just gently enough to prevent spilling.
"What's this?" Kojyuuroh asked.
"Eat it and see." Masamune waited as Kojyuuroh carefully – one might even say nervously, but one would be wrong – sampled the dish. His ever-closed eyes gave nothing away.
Masamune couldn't stand to wait. "Well?" he demanded.
Kojyuuroh took his time chewing before he swallowed. It's noodles! Masamune raged internally. It doesn't take that long to eat!
Finally Kojyuuroh looked up at his young master. "It's good," he told him. "Good enough for Hana-san."
"Excellent!" Masamune enthused, not noticing that he had never mentioned the reason he was picking up cooking again to his retainer. It was finally time.
Now that he had the important bit, the ability to make the noodles right, he had to lay his plans. It would never do to cook for Hana at the ura-shichiken. Masamune had no desire to feed Hana's Other Men, and besides, they would make comments. A picnic wouldn't be any good either, since noodles didn't transport well. Or did they? The boy wasn't sure, but he didn't want to take the chance of serving Hana stringy noodles the first time his crush ate his cooking. And of course the restaurants he usually took Hana to were out of the question. No, it had to be somewhere private, but with a stove.
The solution was obvious. He would have to take Hana home.
The idea definitely didn't frazzle him. He was a great warrior who was made nervous by nothing. But Hana, in his house? At his table? Maybe even . . . in his room? The ideas, and images, that kept running through his mind distracted him.
Enough. He'd just man up and do it.
But he couldn't just ask Hana to come over, could he? It had to seem casual, like they just happened to stop by and then he offered to cook something, since they were there anyway. Yes, that was it. That was how it should work.
Now he just needed to lure Hana away. How should he do it? Mentioning the noodles was out of the question, of course. It had to be a surprise, and besides, the Other Men would still make comments. He didn't need their comments. He just needed Hana's appreciation.
The time was right, and there were no more excuses, so the next morning – luckily a weekend, but Masamune would have done the same if it were a school day, Kojyuuroh be damned – he went to the ura-shichiken. Even more luckily, it was Hana who answered the door for him, looking even more adorable than usual in a sweater that looked like a penguin.
"That's sooooo cute!" Masamune exclaimed. He was so lucky to be able to see the cutest living thing in this world like this.
"Oh, it's you." That was you-know-who, of course; it figured he'd come around to dampen the grade-schooler's joy.
"Show some respect!" Masamune growled. "That's not how you greet an honored guest."
"Oh – right – sorry – i mean, welcome, Masamune-kun." He bowed politely, obviously flustered.
Better, but not good enough. "That's Masamune-sama to you!"
"Ma-Masamune-sama."
"Welcome, Masamune," Hana added.
"Hana, i came to see you!"
The grade-schooler turned instantly back to his crush. "Hana, i came to see you!"
"Of course," Four-eyes muttered, but the boy was spared the necessity of a sharp retort.
"What's this?" Sakura came to join the group at the door. Masamune liked him the best of Hana's Other Men, if only because he was the only one who didn't act like a Love Rival.
"Masamune's here," Hana told him.
"Maa-kun, welcome!" the big man said jovially. "On your own today?"
Yes, Masamune had left Kojyuuroh behind, and he had done so for a reason. "I came to take Hana out for a walk," the boy announced grandly.
"Oh?" That was from Sakura.
"Huh?" That was the four-eyed fool, of course.
"You'd better not put Hana in any danger. And come back at a decent hour." Tachibana had joined the conversation, giving Masamune his usual hard look. It was a good think Masamune had left Kojyuuroh behind. It was getting to be quite a crowd.
"I'd never put Hana in danger!" Masamune exclaimed, bristling. How dare Tachibana suggest he might not do his best to protect his little kitten! The boy was a great warrior – a legend, in fact. Had Tachibana's name gone down in history? The great Masamune Date, the fearsome One-Eyed Dragon, didn't think so. He had come this close, this close, to conquering Japan. If only that bastard Tokugawa hadn't–
But that wasn't the point. This was about Hana. Masamune could, and would, protect Hana with his life. That was only common sense.
"Um . . . i think . . . Hana-san can . . ." the fool tried to say, but naturally no one paid any attention to him. Masamune and Tachibana continued to glare at each other. The one who backed down would lose, and Masamune had no intention of being that man.
"Now, now," Sakura interceded. "Let the kids have their fun. They'll be fine." Tachibana didn't look convinced, but it turned out he didn't have to be.
"Hana's going with Masamune," said Hana, sitting down on the doorstep to pull on a pair of shoes.
Yes! Yes yes yes yes yes! Masamune could hardly contain his joy, but he settled for shooting a smug look at Tachibana and the loser – both losers now. In just a few moments, he would have Hana all to himself and away from prying eyes.
"Come on," he told Hana once the shoes were on. "Let's go! Bye!" This last was, of course, to the poor fools who wouldn't get to spend time with the darling Hana that day.
"See you later," Hana told them, taking Masamune's hand.
That made it even harder for Masamune to contain himself, but he made it down the street and away from the ura-shichiken without making a (complete) fool of himself. Kojyuuroh wasn't around to make comments on his behavior around his sweetheart, and if the Other Men said something, the boy didn't notice. Why should he pay any attention to them, anyway?
Once they were out of eyesight of Hana's home, Masamune began to feel a bit nervous. (No he didn't, the great Masamune Date was never nervous, shut up.) Surely any moment now Hana would ask where they were going, what his plans were for them that day, but the questions never came. Hana seemed content to walk side by side with him, slightly swinging their joined hands forward and back.
The boy knew he had to say something, talk to Hana, but what to say? He was far too – no, he wasn't shy, it was just strategically not a good idea to bring up the meal he planned to provide for his kitten until it was actually time to serve it. Well, no, he'd have to cook it too, but the point was that this was the wrong time to tell his lovely sweet Hana.
So instead, they wandered about for a few hours. Masamune liked exploring, and Hana went along wherever he happened to lead. He wasn't subtle about watching the object of his well-deserved affections, and Hana seemed happy just to be spending time with him. Masamune hoped that was the case. Sometimes it was so hard to tell what Hana was thinking about! Usually, though, if Hana was upset, Hana would tell him so. That was just the kind of wonderful person Hana was.
Masamune was only partially paying attention to where they went, but as noon grew closer, he steered them oh-so subtly towards his home. That way, when Hana said, "I'm hungry," Masamune could reply, "Oh, i live near here. Let's go to my house and get something to eat." To which Hana would reply, "Do you cook, Masamune?" And he would say, "Well, yes, a little. Would you like me to make you something?" And Hana would say, "Oh, yes please," and that was how it would go. Masamune's plan was perfect – well, you couldn't become a great general without some tactical ability.
Hana didn't announce hunger, although when they passed by noodle shops those provided a bit of a distraction. Each time Masamune did his best to talk Hana away from them. Hana listened to him, although his poor kitten looked a little confused as to why he didn't grandly declare that it would be his treat the way he usually did.
Sorry, Hana, he thought, but didn't address the issue out loud. He had to be casual. In not desperation, he steered them ever closer to his house. He only had to adjust his plan a little. All he needed was for Hana to say, "Don't you live around here, Masamune?"
Of course, Hana didn't say it.
Resigned, he guided his beloved to his street. He loved everything about Hana, after all, even the way his crush had of never doing what he expected. "Oh," he said, in a completely natural way that didn't make it seem like he had planned it, shut up, "That's my house. When did we get here?"
Hana gracefully didn't point out his stilted dialogue.
"Are you hungry, Hana?" he asked.
"A little."
"Well," Masamune let his chest puff out a little, "since we're here, i could cook something for you. If you want."
Hana blinked at him. "Masamune, you cook? What kind of things?"
Proudly the boy leaned over and whispered in Hana's ear.
Hana beamed. He had never seen that beautiful face look so happy. "Really, Masamune?"
The cuteness was overpowering. Masamune felt an overwhelming urge to throw himself into Hana's arms, declaring his usual mantra of "You're sooooooo cute!" He couldn't stop himself from embracing his darling, but he controlled himself enough to reply, "Of course! I'd make anything for you, but i thought you'd like noodles the best."
Hana's head blurred, it bobbed up and down so quickly.
"Heh." Another successful plan of attack from the great Masamune Date. He knew his pleasure in victory was showing on his face, but what did it matter. "Come on in. it won't take too long." He took the lead, and Hana's hand, as the one he adored followed him happily up the steps and into his new house.
Kojyuuroh spotted them as they changed from their street shoes into slippers. "Ah. Welcome, Hana-san."
Hana smiled and raised a hand in greeting. "Hi."
"I take it you'll be needing the kitchen then, Masamune-sama?"
"Yes i will," the boy declared, once again not noticing the way his motives were entirely transparent to his aide. "I will be cooking lunch for Hana. Stay out of the way."
Kojyuuroh raised his eyebrows and successfully hid a smile. "Of course, Masamune-sama. Shall i get down the good dishes for you?"
"If you like," his young master replied casually. He headed to the kitchen, Hana following along like a puppy or a duckling. Hana was just too cute for words, he thought happily. Then he sternly reprimanded himself. Had to focus. If he didn't do a good job, Hana might actually . . .
No. The thought was just too horrible to put into words, even inside his own head. He would make the noodles, and not only that, he would make them so well that Hana would never want to go back to that four-eyed loser's cooking ever again.
He had neglected, in his preparation to cook for Hana, to remember that his kitten often liked to watch those favorite dishes being prepared. He had known that in his head, of course, but he hadn't anticipated just how nerve-wracking it would be to cook for the one he loved while that very object of his affections stared in unblinking anticipation. It made him more aware than ever that he couldn't afford to make a single mistake. Every motion he made felt jerky. He couldn't stop from second-guessing himself. Was that the right thing to put in? Had he heated it long enough? What was he supposed to so here? Was he . . .?
A stress-filled half hour later (for him, at least), the meal was complete. Two full servings (Kojyuuroh had no business joining them on this auspicious occasion), ready to be eaten. "It's done," he announced grandly, using his sleeve to wipe nervous sweat off his forehead.
Hana threw those oh-so-coveted arms around Masamune's neck. "Thank you, Masamune!" There wasn't really anything more to say, so without making more of a fuss, Hana sat down to the meal.
The boy watched with bated breath, chopsticks poised. This was the moment of truth. If Hana didn't like it . . .
"It's delicious!" Hana exclaimed. He felt a wave of relief, but he didn't let it show on his face. After all, he had known all along Hana would love his cooking.
He watched Hana happily scarf down noodles, his noodles, and beamed with pride. He had won! Now Hana had absolutely no reason to favor that other guy! Victory hadn't tasted nearly this good in the Warring States period.
"Your noodles will get stringy," Hana told him. Masamune jumped and hurried to eat his own share before his hard work went to waste.
A/N: With this fic, i've now written exactly one third of the G7 archive. I'm disappointed, you guys! Someone else please write one so i have something new to read. I guess for now i'll just have to branch out and write about other G7 characters. Like Sakura. He's fun to write.