Summary: Rory Gilmore, once the townprincess. What happened?
Disclaimer: I just own the idea, which has been whirling in my head for some time now. I hope it's original!
She noticed people talking. Looking at her, quickly averting their eyes when she looked back. Their whispered conversations coming to an halt whenever she passed by, only to start again seconds after. She didn't hear what they were talking about, but deep inside she knew. She knew when it had started, why nobody seemed to smile anymore when she passed by. They glanced at her, faces frowned, eyes curious, hoping to catch a glimpse of remorse, guilt. They never got any reaction out of her. The stoical girl walking down the street was so different from the girl they had all known and loved. So different from the girl she had been just a few days ago. A girl with hopes and dreams for the future. Some dreams she had had against better judgement. Just a few days ago she had lost everything.
"Help please! I need an ambulance on 455 Main Street"
The anxious voice startled her. People stopped whispering when they heard her gasp. Her heart slowly returned to it's normal pace as she realized that the startled voice had been hers. It had been a memory.
She remembered the song that had been playing when she had come home.
Let's talk this over
It's not like we're dead
Was it something I did?
Was it something You said?
It had seemed to mock her. Mock them. Dead. The voice kept whispering it in the dark. It's not like we're dead. No, they weren't. But their love had been. At least his had. She realized that with full force when she found him in bed with some other girl. Naked. Clearly not just talking.
All the things you hide from me
All the shit that you do
She remembered being angry. Furious. She remembered screaming at him.
You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
All of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending
It's nice to know that you were there
Thanks for acting like you cared
And making me feel like I was the only one
It's nice to know we had it all
Thanks for watching as I fall
And letting me know we were done
After that she slipped into a daze. She didn't remember anymore. Everything blacked out. She assumed that she had ran outside, went to the bridge, something she always did when she was upset. Nobody remembered seeing her though. It had been in the middle of the day but nobody remembered her running by, crying. Her mind yelled that it was all a conspiracy. The town wanted her downfall.
And as she was walking through the city, she really thought it was true. People seemed to gather more courage because she appeared to ignore them. They didn't even bother to conceal their voices. Things were talked about, no longer in a hushed voice. Some even dared to keep looking at her when she occasionally casted a glance in their direction.
The next thing she remembered was sitting next to his body. Her hands covered in blood, her shirt soaked when she pulled him into a hug. She remembered cradling him in her arms, slowly rocking back and forth, not sure who she was trying to comfort: him or herself. Ofcourse her fingerprints had been all over the knife. Ofcourse. Didn't they understand that she had pulled the knife out of his chest? She had to...she wouldn't have been able to hold him if she hadn't.
"Please don't do this...please wake up...I didn't mean it...you know I didn't"She really hadn't. She hadn't meant to get so upset. She could have been more understanding. Maybe there had been a logical explanation. Was it something she had done? Something she should have done? They had been married after all. Maybe there was something in the marriage vows that she had forgotten. Some small passage she had passed over while reading their future.
"Yes! I did! I hated him! I wanted to kill him!"She managed not to gasp this time, though she almost stumbled over her own feet. Something that didn't go unnoticed by the towns watchful eyes. The words sounded so strange, though the time she had said them she had meant it. She still did. Sometimes she hated him, something that made her feel uncomfortable. She had married him. She had loved him. How could love have turned to hate?
"Are you really wearing that to the party?"A chuckle. Turning into a fullhearted laugh at the sight of her trying to write.
"Nobody wants you Rory Gilmore. Not even me. I just took you cause I needed someone to do the housekeeping"
His eyes. Sliding over her body, his lip curled up in disgust.
"Do you really think that you've got talent for writing? You don't have talent for anything!"
Him. Pushing her down on the bed. Telling her that she should be glad that he wanted to sleep with her. Didn't she realize how ugly and repulsive she was?
She believed him. After two years of marriage she had hung unto his every word. He didn't like what she was wearing? She would change. He thought she didn't have talent for writing? She wouldn't write anymore. He wanted her to do the housekeeping? She would stop reading and start cleaning.
A single tear slipped over her cheek, though she had vowed herself not to cry. She missed him. She missed him telling her what to do. Without him she felt afloat. She had tried to explain that to other people but she knew that they didn't believe her. They rather believed the newspapers. It was so clear. So simple. Like two times two.
Rory Gilmore, betrayed wife. Angry, hurt, fed up with the abuse. Coming home to see her husband sleeping with someone else. A fight. Screaming. Him telling her that she had it coming. Her grabbing a knife, losing control. Stabbing him. Time and time again. Until he was on the floor and she came out of her daze, realizing what she had done. Kneeling by the body, pulling the knife out of his chest and hugging him. Begging him to come to life again. Calling 911 so they wouldn't suspect anything.
The worst part was that she couldn't even protest against the accusations. When people looked at her she wondered if they saw something that she didn't. Some part she wasn't able to wash off. Her guilt. She couldn't tell people what had really happened because she didn't know. She couldn't tell them that it hadn't been her. Because she didn't know. She didn't know what she had done during that blackout. She couldn't tell them she was innocent. Because maybe she wasn't.
Another tear fell down her cheek. Soon she would be crying. To the people in Stars Hollow it was a confession.
Review please!
A/N: I know this was jumbled, but it was the way I wanted to write it. I wanted to make clear how confused Rory was, and I hope I succeeded!