MORE THAN JUST MY MASTER:
I can't believe this all started with one slice of chocolate cake. But it did. I brought him dessert as usual, and I decided on a very special chocolate cake, one made with real chocolate and extra milk… My master smiled as he ate it, bathed in the mixture of moonlight and orange glow from the fireplace, but the glow of his smile lit up the room. He looked so sweet….
But seeing his smile…the way his lips seemed so soft and sweet…the way it made him look so delicate and like a whole new person, one who could actually feel love and happiness….
I could never get that smile out of my mind. Weeks went by. I was just trying to find some occasion, an excuse to give cake to him again. I knew I couldn't give him the cake every night or it wouldn't be special anymore...but it was official. All I wanted was his smile. All I wanted was that kind face, the master I had seen that night who could love someone…
-x-X-x-
"Elizabeth! Stop it! Right now! ELIZABETH! STOP!"
"But, Ciel…"
"STOP."
"But I'm just trying to make things cute and pretty…"
"DON'T. This is MY house, MY MANSION to be more exact, and I CAN'T work with you redecorating every single room in this awful pink color, and I CANNOT put my life on pause to clean up after every mess you leave behind! Nor can I have Sebastian working his butt off to accommodate you when there have been three more crime sprees and two major robberies that we've got to get though! Now either this stops or I ban you from this manor!"
"Ciel…Ciel...you're always working! Always! You never make time for me! Instead you just spend all day with that butler and you do whatever the Queen says without a second thought for me! You don't care about me! And pink is not awful! This is going to be my house too some day when we're married-"
"You know what Elizabeth? WRONG. If you don't like how I act and don't understand that all you do is cause problems for me, then this engagement is OFF. Now get OUT of my home."
And thus, my master became single again.
-X-x-X
It took a day or so for me to realize he was now single though…I guess because he never really seemed 'not-single' to begin with…
And the same day I realized was the same day he asked for more of that special chocolate cake. While I made it, something else dawned on me too…
He considered me when he argued with Elizabeth…and she was right…if I wasn't cleaning or cooking, I was right there beside my master. Did…did he place me as more important than her when he fought with her? Was I more important to him?
Before I had time to fully think about it, the cake was done. I had prepared a small, personal-sized one for the convenience of my master. But as I brought it up to him, the suspicion that that he cared grew deeper and deeper.
I opened the door to his study.
I set the cake down on his desk.
"Sebastian…" he had his chair facing the window, but I could still make out his voice.
"Yes?"
"I…I'm sorry. I made you go through all that trouble…cleaning and cleaning every day to fix what she'd done, just to dump her in the end…I'm sorry."
My doubts were erased. He did care about me.
Some spark ignited within me, taking its first breath and coming to life like a sleeping dragon deep in my heart, "There's nothing to be sorry for. I am one hell of a butler, a butler of the Phantomhive family. If I couldn't keep up with her, it would be a disgrace to your family." I knew I was only saying it to buy me the time I needed to figure out what this feeling was….
Whatever it was, it was coursing through me like lava in my veins. It was burning, so intensely now that it almost hurt…
He cares about me more than his own (ex-) fiancée…he really does….
"Sebastian? You seem distracted? Is everything okay?"
"Huh? Oh…yes, yes I'm fine, thank you."
My breath caught, anticipating…
He picked up the fork, he cut into the cake, he took the piece he had cut, chewed, swallowed…
And smiled.
I didn't know what was happening to me….
I walked over to him, noting a slight smudge of frosting, and I came in for whatever my body was mindlessly seeking.
Ciel tensed in his chair, gripping the armrests, his eyes sealing shut, and what I wanted hit me as soon as I licked away the frosting.
I wanted my master. Even if it was totally unrealistic, totally inappropriate,…I wanted him.
I could hear his breath, the way he was taking air in rapid gasps, the way his breath caught as I slowly let my lips meet his…
I felt his arms wrap around my neck, and shock rocketed through the back of my mind as he pulled me in closer. It felt like life had finally slowed and finally let me enjoy something.
I wanted needed my master. This boy…no, this man, this young male…
Was he more than my master though?