Run and hide in your bomb shelters, everyone! Antauri's Shadow is writing a multi-chapter crackfic! :D
Chapter 1: Villainous Villainy
It was a bright and sunny day in Shuggazoom City, and everyone was happy.
Everyone that is, except for the Skeleton King (fortunately). The great and powerful Ruler of Evil is never happy because he is always (fortunately) getting his bony butt beaten down by everyone's favorite team of robotic inter-galactic crime fighting super superb simians, but today he was exceptionally ticked off because Mandarin had escaped from his cell.
"That orange-furred nincompoop was supposed to be executed at dawn! I can't have my new pet take his place if that disgrace is still running around!" The Skeleton King roared, his villainous vexation evident.
"I am not a pet…" the new Skelemandarin protested pitifully, despite the fact that he was perched upon the undead king's knee.
"Of course not, my good and faithful servant, Skelemandarin, how thoughtless of me." Said the Skeleton King, petting the obscenely obnoxious creature.
"Don't ever call me that!" The clone screeched. "I AM Mandarin! I am, I am, I am, I am, I am!" the hideously heinous little beast howled in a toddler-esque tantrum of titanic proportions.
" If we may interrupt, tick-tock." Came the voice of the mighty master of the Mecha Realm, with the small simian Sakko at his side. "Must the pathetic primate prisoner be executed at dawn, sire? After all, what is a few hours in the grand clockwork of things, tick-tock?"
"Of course, it must, Lord Scrapperton!" Came the Skeleton King's reply and he shook his head in disbelief. " You of all of my most loyal servants should know that dawn is the only time a proper execution can be executed excitingly, even if an enslaved executionee escapes. An execution at any other time simply isn't done, it's just not proper!" he exclaims and waves his scepter thingy around in the air. It glows, and a tremendously terrible tome titled, "The Book of Evil" appears before them in a fantastic flash. Sakko screeches in fright as the gargantuan book flattens him.
"You see," began the Skeleton King opening the decrepit, dusty, dingy disgrace of literature. "It's right-" he stops, suddenly, a long skeletal finger tapping the page impatiently. He flips a few pages, unable to find the one he's looking for. "Well, it's in here somewhere!" the undead overlord snaps, slamming the guide to gore, violence and other such villainy shut.
"Page 18,475, my lord." Came the muffled mumblings of the monkey mushed beneath the book. "Line 248."
"Ah, here! See!" exclaimed the king pointing at the proffered passage, and Scrapperton squinted, and found the Skeleton King to be absolutely correct.
"We must find him and recapture him and execute him properly!" screamed Skelemandarin, hopping about in a furious, frantic frenzy like the deranged mutant monkey that he was.
"And the Shuggazoom will be mine! Mwahahahahahaha!" laughed the Skeleton King.
(How recapturing Mandarin related to the total dominion of a small, relatively uninhabited pink planet is beyond this author, but apparently it does, in his mind.)