This is my own version of season 3 episode 19. I do not own The Vampire Diaries, I am just a simple fan. Do make a mental note that I am sleep deprived and functioning on coffee alone. My apologies for any typos, grammatical errors, ect. Hope you enjoy!

The Choice

Considering the events that had happened today, my mind had wandered everywhere else except into sleep. I closed my eyes many times, tossing, turning, trying to force myself to sleep but nothing worked. Counting sheep never worked as my mind always reverted back to everything. My feelings for Damon and Stefan, Jeremy, my friends, Klaus, and myself trying to stay strong and take everything one step at a time when I should be taking many steps.

I had just closed my eyes when I heard the sound of a glass bottle and footsteps. I opened my eyes to see Damon in the dark, with his shirt off, unable to sleep just like myself. As he put on his shirt I stopped thinking about the mess that we were in. Instead, I realized how there are a few things we have in common just like our inability to sleep. He was completely unaware I was still awake as he poured himself a shot of whiskey. I could easily see his mind was unable to calm itself and he was most likely thinking about everything just like I had been.

I still can't take my eyes off of him even as he sits down. He has this look in his eye that I understand but can't exactly pinpoint. I don't know if my heart is beating so fast because my mind is running three hundred miles per hour, or if its because every single time he walks into the room my heart flutters and suddenly I'm completely vulnerable. He pauses for a moment before he puts the plastic cup to his lips and swallows the alcohol. Even when he drinks he cannot find an escape. I can't find an escape. Do I really want to escape? Do I want to sort through my feelings?

The thoughts fade as his eyes meet mine and at that moment we silently told each other many things. My heart beats just a little faster and I close my eyes once again pretending to be asleep when its perfectly clear to us both I'm not. I couldn't help myself when I opened my eyes once again to stare deep into his. The world fades. I'm completely naked. He can see through me as though I was a ghost and that's exactly what he's doing now. But why can't I roll over? Why can't I stop looking into those beautiful blue eyes he has?

So many things cross my mind in the five seconds it took for him to set his cup down, walk over to the bed (our eyes still locked onto each other's), and for him to lay down beside me. He's changed so much since I first met him. At first I thought he was a manipulative, controlling asshole only thinking for himself. But the more I got to know him, the more I see whats really inside his heart. How even the walls he tries to keep himself behind crash and he's vulnerable. Those walls. He never lets them down. Why?

"You never told me about that," I said. "What you did for Rose?"

"It wasn't about you," he replied.

That wall. Always the wall.

"Why don't you let people see the good in you?" I asked, quite curious of his reply.

"Because when people see good, they expect good," he said. He turned and looked at me. In his eyes, I saw that wall fall just a little bit. "And I don't want to have to live up to any expectations."

I didn't know what to think about that. I didn't know what to think about any of this. Everything was so confusing as it was. Why does he make me think the hardest? Why does he always challenge everyone around him? I sighed as I turned to lay on my back. More thoughts flowed through my head and I was becoming very weary of thinking about them. I moved my arm to a more comfortable place but soon felt his hand caress mine. Indescribable energy flowed from my hand throughout my body. He turned to look at me and suddenly I couldn't breathe. I had to get out. I'm suppose to be figuring out all this shit in my head and its clustered and confused and I just don't want to think anymore! I bolted from the bed and walked outside of the hotel room. I propped against something trying to sort out what I was feeling right now. I couldn't describe it. The more I tried to push myself away from Damon the more it seems I become closer, and closer, and I couldn't stop it!

I heard the door open and even as I couldn't see him I knew he was behind me wanting to say something, wanting me to give in to the connected we obviously had. Not now. Please..

"Don't," I said.

My back was heated as I knew his eyes were on me.

"Why not?... Elena?"

The way he says my name, the way he challenges me, the way he tells me everything without opening his mouth... just.. him. What the hell do I feel? This is what I feel. Before I could talk any sense of logic into my own mind I turned around and in a few short strides my hands cupped the back of his neck and my lips were pressed against his. My body exploded with electricity as our lips crushed each other's and my mind went completely blank. I didn't even mind the after taste of the whiskey. I didn't care about anything. Our kiss became deeper with passion as I was backed against a pole. I couldn't stop. I didn't want to stop. My body, my mind, my heart screamed for him, screamed for more. If it is so wrong then why does it feel so right?

Before I knew it he had picked me up and my legs were wrapped firmly around his waist. With our lips still overlapping one another, my body still screaming, he carries me back into the hotel room. I knew it was wrong, but it didn't feel wrong. It felt so right and so much more passion and emotions than what I had ever felt with Stefan. As he laid me on the bed, I didn't protest. I'm not the type who likes to screw in hotel rooms but right now I didn't give two shits about any of it. All I knew, was Damon had arms of steel yet they were so gentle and his kisses to my neck were so tender that I whimpered for more.

But as I did he stopped and as his body crushed mine, he looked deep into my eyes for a sign this is what I want. He is who I want. Of course I didn't have all night with him on top of me to make a decision but as his eyes were locked onto mine I threw Stefan out of my head. I owe Damon's brother my life but things had just changed when Klaus corrupted him. Even though we were growing farther apart and I never stopped loving him, it wasn't enough. Seconds had passed, our eyes still locked.. then and there I made my decision. Tonight I chose. I placed my hand on Damon's cheek as he moved strands of hair away from my face. He was searching for an answer in my eyes and I'm giving him one. My thumb grazed over his skin as I slid my hand to the back of his head and pulled his head down. Our lips met and I felt as though a house was just lifted off my chest.

The gentle way he kissed my neck, his lips felt like feathers yet made my body cringe. I wanted him. I wanted him in more aspects than one. I want to wake up tomorrow only to find he had sneaked out to surprise me with coffee and a bagel. I want him to kiss my forehead when I feel like breaking. I want him to tell me how my butt looked in a pair of jeans. I want to be his strength. I want him to punch someone for just looking at me in an inappropriate way. I love him...

I was no longer in control of myself when he started lifting up my shirt but I didn't protest. I leaned up so he could pull it over my head and throw it. As he did so he lifted me with one arm behind my back and my chest pressed to his. He placed both hands gently on my face as we pressed our lips together. Now the kiss was deepening more and I let his tongue dart through my lips and enter my mouth. I didn't protest. I whimpered for more. As I pulled off his shirt, I lightly nipped at his bottom lip. His shirt came off and was thrown to the floor. He wrapped both of his arms around me and pressed me to his chest once again. Our lips have not separated and I could feel the heat our bodies were producing. His lips caressed my neck, nipping at my flesh, kissing my skin, and I could only arch my back and my neck as my eyes closed and a light moan escaped. His fingers began to slide across my back until they reached my bra. He gently unhooked it and threw it across the room. My breasts were exposed and I felt more naked than usual. Hell.. I was naked, but I liked it. I loved how his breath made my back tingle, I love how much my body responded to his gentle touch. His lips trailed up my neck until he reached my earlobe. He nipped the flesh and another moan escaped. My fingers dug into his back but I didn't use my nails, just my finger tips. His skin was so smooth and I couldn't bear the thought of damaging such delicate skin.

My fingers slid down is back to his jeans. I could feel his member pressing against me and I could barely wait. He gently laid me down as my fingers fished for the button and zipper. His eyes never left mine as he aided me in the removal of his pants along with his boxers. He was completely exposed but he wouldn't let my eyes leave his. He slid his hand over my cheek as he used his other hand to unbutton and unzip my own jeans as his eyes were still trapping me with his. He gently removed my pants and threw them to the floor.

I was now completely exposed. He broke our intense gaze to look over my body. His hand trailed from my cheek, he cupped both of my breasts then slid his hands down my stomach. I watched his eyes as they didn't miss one inch of my naked body. For the first time I saw a fire inside his eyes that was burning with more passion than ever before. His hands slid down my waist and stopped on my thighs. He then returned his eyes to mine and I saw his lips curl into a genuine smile. His eyes were soft and glazed, his breathing was heavy, and he was smiling. At me.

"You're beautiful.." He murmured.

The way he complimented me made my own lips curl into a smile. He leaned down to trap my lips with his, and I could feel his smile as nipped at my bottom lip. My fingertips dug into his back as his member caressed me, and I could feel his length as he pressed against me.

"Also wet," he mumbled into the kiss.

He lifted his body off mine and I finally saw him naked. From his shoulders to his waist and defined and toned muscle that could crush every bone in my body. Even though he had a great amount of strength he touched me delicately, softly, and that made me realize how much of a great lover he will be. I trailed my eyes from his chest, to his waist, to his thighs where I finally saw him. My cheeks slightly burned as I saw every part of his body covered in pure muscle. Even his member which had great length and great width.

I trailed my eyes back up his body where my eyes met the smirk on his face. He hovered over me as he kissed me from my neck, down my collar bone, across my chest, and finally took my left nipple between his teeth. He cupped my other breast as he ran the tip of his tongue over my nipple and my back arched into him and a greater moan escaped my lips. I whimpered for more. I wanted more. I craved more. He kissed the area between my breasts and took my right nipple between his teeth causing my back and neck to arch in a duo.

He trailed his lips from my breast, down my stomach, and stopped just above the area of my body pulsing the most. He spread my legs then kissed and nipped my inner thighs before finally stroking me with his tongue. A louder moan escaped my lips as he worked his tongue from bottom to top. The tip of his tongue stroked my weakest spot causing me to shiver as electricity exploded through my legs and back. He entered his tongue and the warmth of his mouth and his breath had me gasping for my breath. I was going to break before it actually happened.

He then placed his body on mine, one arm on both sides of my head, his knees were touching my waist, and as he leaned his head down to kiss me, the tip of his member entered me. I broke the kiss to arch my neck as he pulled himself out, and barely pushed himself back in. As my neck and back arched more, he entered me more but pulled himself out. As he pushed himself back in a moan even more husky than before flew out my mouth and he finally completely entered causing me to gasp. He nipped my lips as he slowly began moving himself. I was no longer in control of my body – I was fully submissive. He kissed my neck as he took my nipples between his fingers now increasing the force and speeds of his thrusts.

I tried to hold on as much as I could but I failed. Not even thirty seconds in and I had more than one orgasm. They were explosive and made my entire body feel increasingly amazing as my muscles tightened and he groaned as his neck arched. He then rolled over, gently pulling me on top of him. His member went inside me causing me moan more. I then began to move myself up and down on him as he matched my rhythm with his hips. As I stopped moving, he continued to thrust inside me and I arched my back and my neck as I moaned with the intensity of his increasing speed.

Becoming weak, I let my body fall limp onto his as he continued his thrusts groaning as my muscles tightened and I had another orgasm. He continued like this for little over five minutes before he finally had his own orgasm. Our breaths heavy, my heart beating, perspiration covering our bodies, he removed himself and I fell limp on his chest. I had to close my eyes. One of his arms was wrapped around my waist while his other hand was stroking my hair.

We both were trying our best to catch our breaths but I couldn't move, I couldn't speak, and I didn't even have the energy to open my eyes. Its amazing how much he can read me. He then lifted up his hips while I lay on top of him, pulled the covers back, and covered us both. His fingers combing my hair was soothing as I managed enough strength to lift my head and plant one last kiss on his lips. I opened my smiling eyes enough to see his staring down at me.

"I love you, Damon.." I whispered.

The End.

A little sketchy, a little rough, but I enjoyed writing it. Hope you guys enjoyed reading it!