Time

Love does involve not only two…

I fidgeted in my seat; the velvet-encased chair felt like it was made of solid rock. Glancing at the grandfather clock just down the hallway, I bit my lip. 15 minutes. I had to meet Sendoh at the beach in 15 minutes. Now, if I could just find an excuse to leave the house in the middle of dinner.

I hadn't expected Otoosan to come home so early today. But I couldn't stand Sendoh up. Not today, especially not today, not on Sendoh-kun's birthday.

I cleared my throat nervously, "Otoosan, I need to go out for a while." I said.

"In the middle of dinner? What do u have to do?" he asked.

"I… I'm just going to wish a friend happy birthday," I said, which was the truth, "I'll be back soon."

"I've noticed that you've been coming home quite late the past few weeks. You're always out when I come back." He said.

"I'm sorry Otoosan, but I've really got to go now. I promise I'll be quick." So saying, I pushed myself away from the table and ran up to my room. Grabbing Sendoh's present in one hand, I raced back downstairs and out the front door. Sprinting towards the beach, which was thankfully near my home, I arrived only 5 minutes late.

"Happy birthday Sendoh," I whispered to him, smiling as my breath made several stray hairs at the nape of his neck fly about. "I brought you a present." I turned in his arms and handed him the parcel.

He raised his eyebrows in surprise. "You remembered." He cried delightedly. Tearing open the wrapping with the eagerness of a child, he gasped in wonder as he lifted the autographed pair of Nike Air Jordans into the moonlight.

"Oh, thank you Kaede." He said, still grinning, "How did you get them autographed by Michael Jordan himself?"

"Never you mind," I said, "Do you like them?"

"Like them?" he asked incredulously, "I LOVE them!"

"And I love you." He said, facing me again. Placing the shoes carefully on the ground, he pulled me into another mind-numbing embrace and kissed me. I melted in his arms, letting him support most of my weight. I closed my eyes, imaging this perfect moment going on forever, then…

"Rukawa." I started, praying to all the powers that be the voice which had just spoken my name did not belong to whom I though it did. Sendoh released me, and I turned, trembling with trepidation, to face my father.

"Otoosan." I said, my calm voice belying the fear inside. I tried to push Sendoh's arms away, but he held on stubbornly. After a moment, I gave up, what was the point of trying to keep our relationship a secret now? I was sure my father had already seen too much.

Taking Sendoh's hand in mine, I started defiantly at my father. To keep Sendoh by my side, that was the only thing that mattered.

I could see him seething with rage, but the words that he next spoke were tinged with hurt. "How could you do this to me Rukawa?" he asked. I blinked, surprised. That wasn't what I had expected him to say. "Where did I go wrong in bringing you up? I though I'd weaned such nonsense out of you. I didn't raise you to be a perverted little catamite…"

"Otoosan!" I cut off his tirade of angry words. "I'm not a pervert. I love Sendoh and he loves me and there's nothing wrong about it." Shaking with tension, I felt Sendoh squeeze my hand, giving me wordless support.

"Wrong?" my Otoosan said bitterly, "It is more wrong than you can ever imagine. You are truly your mother's son Rukawa."

I said nothing. He'd told me that before and I had seen photographs of her as well. Truly, the resemblance was uncanny. Had I left my hair any longer, I would have been the spitting image of my mother.

But I didn't know why he'd brought that up now.

"Do you know why your mother left us?" he said, sorrow colouring his tone. I shook my head. My mother had left us when I was only two, and my father had flared up every time I'd asked him why. Over time, I had just ceased caring. Still, what had this got to do with it?

"She left us," he continued, "for another woman."

I felt like I'd been kicked in the stomach. Staggering, I grabbed Sendoh to prevent myself from falling. I couldn't believe it. "Now do you see?" my father said, head bent. I shook my head, not so much in disbelief as to deny such a possibility.

My father addressed Sendoh, "Are you going to take my son away from me in this way too?"

I clung to Sendoh, a million emotions battering against my heart. Confusion, pain, anger, desperation, disbelief. I whimpered, my head hurt. Things were so clear now; why my father was such a homophobic, why he'd sheltered me from the very concept of homosexuality for most of my life. I couldn't deal with these sudden revelations. Not so many, not now.

Pulling away from Sendoh, I began to run.

hope you enjoyed it. Please give me your comments. I might post a chapter 2.

ã 2002 ai