Author's Note: YESSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!! I've got it!!!!!!!!!! *her daemon, a weird shape-shifter, turns and looks at her* what??? *me* YES!!!! oh, sorry.. it's just that... eureka!!!! *starts typing furiously on keyboard* *daemon-* okay...
The Kangaroo Snape
Harry, Ron, and Hermione are staring glumly down at their desks. Snape is silkily berating Neville in front of the classroom, telling him to look for his toad, Trevor, who is cowering in a deep, slimy portable well the Slytherins brought in just for this. They are all smirking.
Suddenly, the door bursts open and in leaps the weirdest person Harry has ever seen. Tall, with chalk-white skin and red eyes, the figure reminds Harry of someone... but then Harry looks at the person's clothes.
"AAaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!!!" everyone, including Snape, screams and then tries to run out of the room, away from the guy in a huge, nearly transparent, white gown with flowers the shape of bushes embroidered on it, the guy with a dirty white wig perched askew in his lopsided, greasy head, covered on top of the wig with a bathroom tile- colored top white hat. On his feet he wears hideous pointy sandal/high-heels with clashing polka dot red and blue clouds on them.
"Aromohola!" the guy says, and the door shuts tight. The class tries to advert their eyes from the disgusting combination of clothes, man, and snake.
Snake... something stirs in Harry's mind.
"It's Voldemort!!!!!" Harry cries out, withdrawing his wand in a flash. Everyone else looks at each other, looks at Harry, looks at Voldemort (because that's who it is), looks at the crazed fanfic author, look at Harry again, look at each other again, then burst out laughing.
"Ver- very funny Harry!" gasps Ron, crying with laughter and pounding the desk in an attempt to stop laughing. Hermione is on the floor, giggling hysterically and rolling over trying to stop. On the other side of the room, Malfoy is HEEHAWW-ing like a donkey, and Pansy is opera-giggling. Neville is also on the ground, laughing, holding Trevor in his hands with tears of mirth streaming down his face. Snape is draped over his desk, Trevor forgotten, his oily body shaking and gasping and shaking with laughter. Crabbe and Goyle are looking at Malfoy uncertainly, laughing half heartedly.
"HAWHAWHAWHAW!!!!!"
"hehe... heehee...heehee..."
"HEEHAW, HEEHAW, HEEHAW"
*high soprano* " HEEHEEHEEHEEHEEHEE!!!!!"
"Ha, Ha, WAHHHHHHH!!!!. Ha, Ha, WAHHHHHHH!!!!"
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHEHEHEHEHEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!!!"
"Um, ha, ha, um..."
Voldemort looks disgusted. "Here I come in with this great costume, and look what you guys do!!!! You laugh!!!!! Oh, I never can get a break... yes, just laugh at stupid, evil Voldemort, why don't you?" Voldemort sits down dejectedly, but Harry doesn't notice, and instead is looking around at his HYSTERICAL classmates. He tries to laugh but it gets stuck in his throat, and instead makes him feel even more left out and in a non-funny mood than before.
"Erm, guys? Ron? Herm?" Harry suddenly sits stock-still. "HEY EVERYONE, THAT RHYMES!!!!!!!!!!! Erm and Herm!!!!! Herm and Erm!!!!!" So much for Harry not being hyper. Now he sounds like a cheerleader.
"Herm AND Erm!!!! Herm and Erm!!!!!! Herm AND Erm!!!!! Go-o-ooo... HERMERM!!!!!!!!!"
Voldemort shakes his head sadly and leaves the class room lying in fits of laughter still. "Maybe next time they'll listen..."
Snape starts to jump like a frog on his desk, still laughing as hard as possible.
"HAHAHAHAHAHHEHEHEHEHEHE!!!!"
Then he turns into a kangaroo, still jumping and still laughing with a slightly crazed look in his eyes.
No one notices but Herm, who glances at him, and says, mid-giggle, "Oh, yes... the Jumping Defect- laughing + jumping repeatedly on Potion's desks = kanga-rooooooooooo forever!!!!!!!! Hee-heeheehee." Then resumes giggling.
*one month later, an English Muggle news report:*
"Laff-a-roo" Seen and Heard Again
...and pedestrians have reported to have seen the
wild kangaroo more commonly known as, the "Laff-a-roo", only yesterday.
The Laff-a-roo has been laughing for over a month now, some witnesses say.
Mr. H. Potter, of 4 Privet Drive, was interviewed a week ago, as he was
found only a mile away with a peculiar brommstick in his hands from the
start of the Laff-a-roo. To the origin of the 'roo, he says simply-
"I dunno." However, spectators have commented on the boy's mischevious
smile after saying said statement. Upon closer investigatoin, he shrugs
and says, "maybe it got hyper or something forever-" whereas Mr. H. Potter
had to go excuse himself to the woods, where loud peals of laughter were
heard only seconds later.
If anyone has any information on the whereabouts
of the kangaroo, please report, and in the meantime, please watch out for
the 'roo's laughter- it's very- contagious...
: :_end of article_: :