Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN HP
Summary: Harry Potter has eaten some mysterious Cake, and gnome he sees glowing juice, homework gnomes, flying frogs, and many other weird things. How will his friends and peers react to this. Can he face this insanity?
Chapter 1: Mysterious Rooms, Glowing Juice and Homework Gnomes
In the random school of Hogwarts, a school for witches and wizards and ex-convicts and murders, Harry Potter, the Boy-Who-Lives-To-Kick-Voldy's-Butt, was raiding Ron Weasley's trunk, while he slept. "LIKE OMG THERES NO GOOD CANDY IN HERE" shouted Harry tearing through the trunk. Ron rolled over and made a snorting sound but didn't wake up. Realizing that there was no candy there he ditched the trunk and decided to go rob the kitchens of Hogwarts.
He grabbed his cloak and map and then he was off. As he reached the third floor he discovered that there was a mysterious room that had appeared on the map. Curious he searched for the room. He discovered it a moment later. The door to the room was big and blue. The door had a sign that read: "Free CAKE!!!" Harry practically ran into the room. Inside there was a single table with a large blue cake on the table.
Harry ran up to it and grabbed a knife from the table that had randomly appeared. He cut him self a giant piece and munched. He wasn't aware, but a faint blue glow passed over him. He also didn't notice that there where frogs jumping up and down dancing on the table behind him. "Yummy" said Harry as he finished. Stuffed, he left for his dorm. As he laid in his bed, he completely forgot that he had yet to do his potions homework.
THE NEXT DAY
Harry was awoken by a confused Ron. He was wondering why his trunk was open and the contents where strewn about. "What the hell happened" demanded Ron to no one. Harry quietly walked out of the room and made his way down to the great hall. As he sat down in between Ginny and Neville, he noticed that the pumpkin juice was glowing. "Erm why is the juice glowing" he asked. Dean stared at him. "Are you drunk on firewhiskey, the juice is not glowing" he said. Harry continued to stare at the juice. He shook his head and grabbed a glass of water.
After he was done drinking he went to grab a piece of toast, he thought he saw a small creature scuttle by. He shrugged it of as one of the student's cats, and finished his breakfast. As he was about to leave the hall, he heard Hermione mention something. "Potions class is so easy" she said. Harry paled. "OMG MY FUCKING POTIONS HOMEWORK" he screamed, drawing in everyone's attention. "POTTER, DON'T YELL" screamed Professor McGonagall. Harry looked sheepishly and walked out, towards his doom. Potions class. As Harry neared the door, he saw something red and white run past him. He didn't see what it was, but he knew it wasn't a cat.
He looked to see if he could catch a glimpse of it but it was already gone. He shook his head and entered the class. Professor Snape was currently writing something on the black board. Harry sat quietly down besides Hermione. After a few minutes the Potions master started the class. "Every one take out your homework" he said. Harry was mentally beating him self. He was so doomed. Severus walked up and down the isles collecting the homework. When he got to Harry's desk he sneered. "Homework" he said. Harry reached in to his bag and pulled out his half finished homework. The teacher glanced at it and frowned, before adding it to the pile. "Congrats Potter, you managed a perfect essay" he said. Harry stared blankly at him. He raised his hand. "What" he asked.
Snape sneered again. "I said your essay was perfect" he snapped. As Harry was about to faint he saw a small blue gnome thingy appear on his desk. "HOLY SHIT IT'S A BLUE GNOME" he screamed. Every eye turned to stare at him. Draco Malfoy raised his hand. "I think Potter's been smelling the ingredients" he said. Snape quieted him and sent Harry of to the infirmary. When he entered Madame Pomfrey sat him on a a bed and scanned him with some spells. When she couldn't find a diagnostic she frowned. "May I ask what is wrong with you, seeing as I can't find out myself" she asked. "I saw a small blue gnome appear on my desk" he stated. Pomfrey stared blankly at him.
She left the room for a moment and came back with a book. She handed to him. The title read: The Cons of Drug Use. Harry stared at the cover. "I'M NOT ON DRUGS, YOU'D OBVIOUSLY WOULD KNOW THAT, THROUGH THOSE SPELLS" he snapped. Pomfrey sent him a look telling him to not talk so long. "Well, I guess you have a cold or something, back to the Dorms with you" she stated. Harry thought her healing methods where in need of some improvement and wandered up to the dorms. As he sat on his bed he saw another blue gnome appear. "AGHHH ANOTHER BLUE GNOME" he screamed. The blue gnome smiled. "Hi! I'm a homework gnome" it said. Only one thing running through Harry's head. WTF!