In his dreams, Itachi is slow, gentle, maybe even loving. In his dreams, Sasuke feels soft caresses, fingertips against his cheek, lips brushing against his own in something so sweet, something he'll never get and something he likes but isn't sure he really wants.
In his dreams, Itachi is above him, places tender kisses over his face and down his neck, eyelashes fluttering against pale skin and a look in his eyes that's never, ever been there anywhere else. He feels light, even in such a heady moment and Itachi's touch is careful and teasingly slow and he's not sure whether he wants to ask for more or if he likes it just like it is.
In his dreams, Itachi is an angel, seemingly intangible and tangible all at once in a feather soft dance of lips and tongue and fingertips. Waking from these dreams always leaves him feeling calm and yet so very, very empty.
In his nightmares, Itachi is a murderer, killing everything he could ever have hoped to hold dear and leaving him to soak in the blood of it all. He hates and he hurts and he screams until his voice is raw but it never brings them back.
In his nightmares, Itachi is everywhere but where he is and still haunts him, eyes like blood in the darkness. It's that gaze boring into him that he can't shake from his mind upon waking, a silent scream on his lips and he tries to ignore the way he shakes out of something more than just fear.
As he wakes, Itachi is never there, but when he is he is neither gentle nor bloodstained (though the smell is always there; Sasuke wonders if he imagines it).
In reality, Itachi is rough and painful and binding and dominance, all over him and yet barely touching him at all.
In reality, Itachi has a wild sadistic streak, loves to hurt him and leave him trembling and bleeding. Itachi loves to make him forget all his pride and beg for more, and Sasuke wonders why he dreams of something so gentle, wonders why he seems to want it when what he gets already is just so good.
He wonders, always after it's over, just how he came to be such a masochist, and when the lines between love and hate blurred beyond salvation. He wonders why he dreams of an Itachi that isn't and never will be, but when he falls asleep again, it's unspoken affection and that feather-touch that greets his mind.
In his dreams, he sometimes wonders if maybe, just maybe, it's just the love he's wanting, not the gentle touch. When he wakes again, he wonders, and maybe he does want to feel affection in the bite of a blade and the harsh tugging on his hair, but love is something Itachi has never known, and never will, and in the end, it's the emptiness that haunts him.
Don't we feel better now? No? Well that sucks. Reviews are love, really.