Shaun Hastings could not do this again.
Lucy had been first and now that goddamned bloody temple beneath Rome was forever seared in his memory. He had been powerless and watched in silent horror as Desmond, unable to control himself, killed Lucy right in front of them and then collapsed into a coma. It felt like a nightmare - a nightmare where he couldn't move, couldn't think and, for a moment, couldn't breathe. All he could do was watch as their real life horror movie played out in front of them in slow motion. Becca didn't talk about it much. Neither did he. It was too painful. Lucy was their friend and she had betrayed them, had planned to sell them out to the Templars. For what seemed like an endless amount of weeks they had all lived and worked together hiding from Abstergo, firstly in the warehouse and eventually in the derelict Villa Auditore. He had stolen her yogurt. It was the little things like that that kept him sane. Some little piece of normal cause God knows there's not much of that in his life. But for weeks Lucy lied to them and they found out just as she had died. There was no chance of an explanation, no chance of winning her back. She was just gone. He had stayed to arrange her funeral. It was a small affair. Simple. And at the end, when it was just himself and her tombstone, he accepted in her death the only part of her life he would never understand. He knelt gently and placed one single rose against the cold stone for his friend, admitting and accepting that she had been a Templar. He decided to say words he'd never thought he'd say but they had been her beliefs and it felt right to grant her this one last respect. So with a quiet voice, just above a whisper, Shaun Hastings for the one time in his life said "may the father of understanding guide you." He kissed his fingers and placed them against her name on the stone. "Sleep well, Lucy."
He hadn't failed to notice the way his heart seemed to flutter around Desmond. It had started in the Villa. At one point he had stopped being Desmond bloody Miles, the special chosen one and had become simply Desmond, his friend who was going through far too much for anyone to cope with. He would find himself looking at Desmond lying in the Animus and feel himself growing concerned. His eyes would also rake over his features and he found himself drawn to the man. It wasn't new for Shaun. He didn't like to label himself - the world was already far too bloody weird for him to care about what people would call him - he'd fancied blokes before and had a couple of girlfriends over the years (speaking of which, he'd have to ask Becca what she and his ex were talking about over dinner that day) so it wasn't odd for him to realise he was attracted to the other man. He just couldn't believe the other man was Desmond of all people. But he never mentioned it. And it stayed that way right up until the final temple. Unspoken, not shown, but deeply felt. Maybe after all this was over, they might go for a drink. He could swear he'd seen Desmond looking at him the same way. Maybe if they saved the world and this madness ended for ten minutes, something might spark between them. When January actually did come about, he would've laughed at those thoughts if it didn't hurt so bloody much. Desmond fucking Miles being a hero, saving the world, sacrificing himself for people he would never know and no one would realise that he had saved them. Shaun lost count of the amount of bottles of scotch he cried into. He had let himself believe, let himself hope that maybe, just maybe, they would win and they could give it a go. He couldn't even say goodbye and make his peace with it like he had done with Lucy. They had to leave immediately because they knew Abstergo wouldn't be far behind. So he had let his eyes rake over Desmonds features one last time and quietly whispered as he ran; "I wish we had the chance."
He forgot when it had started. For the first few weeks after Desmond died, Becca would come over to his tiny apartment to check on him and they would spend the whole day on their computers hacking Abstergo and trying to find their master plan, glad of the company however silent it was. Eventually things were like normal again and they would joke like they used to. They even infiltrated Abstergos entertainment division with the help of IT tech John and smuggled out some data. After a few months, she started sleeping on his couch and he noticed her stuff slowly moving into his apartment. By the end of the year, he felt butterflies in his stomach whenever he looked at her and he knew, god help him, that he was falling for her. One night, he heard the door of his bedroom creak and he opened his eyes to see her standing there, tears streaming down her cheeks. He had smiled at her weakly and pulled back the covers on the other side of the bed and she had climbed in and held onto him as they both fell asleep, desperate for a little comfort in a cruel world. He forgot how long after that the sex had started but he knew it had started as another form of comfort - intimacy that they couldn't have outside of their little world of Assassins and Templars. But it eventually became more than comfort. They understood each other better than anyone and they just seemed to fit and they looked after each other. A couple more years of hacking and infiltrating and then, with Bishops help, they came close to another piece of Eden. The shroud was hidden under Buckingham Palace. Abstergo wouldn't be far behind but they had Galina to help them so maybe, just maybe, they could win. They had to. After Desmond, the thought of losing someone else he had fallen in love with was too much to bear. And after Lucy and Desmond, losing his last source of happiness in this world might just kill him. But Abstergo came in fast.
She screamed his name and he saw her fly in front of him, protecting him as she had always done. The gunshot made his blood run cold. He grabbed her, pulled her back towards a pillar desperately trying to keep her away from anymore danger. He would not lose another friend in one of these goddamn temples. He stroked her head, held her hand, yelled at Galina for an exit. Everything was moving too slowly. Becca needed help. All he could do was plead. Plead with the God he wasn't sure he believed in. Plead with the universe because this just wasn't fair. Plead with Becca to stay strong, to not leave him alone in the world. She wanted him to stop them. Fuck that, they weren't important. His voice was broken, the tears barely hidden. "Forget the bloody shroud! Stay with me Becs, please!"
Shaun Hastings could not do this again.