The seemingly incorporeal and omnipresent announcer's voice bellowed through the stands. "Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, to the 20th annual-" The logo appeared on the large, digital screen in the center of the ceiling, "Super Smash Brothers fighting tournament!" The audience went mad with their cheers and the announcer continued to speak to the crowd. Meanwhile, outside the view of the audience, Luigi leaned his back against a wall, smoking a cigarette. He didn't dare smoke in front of Mario because he'd probably go on a long tangent about how 'smoking causes-a-cancer!' or some bull that Luigi didn't want to deal with. He was a video game character, he couldn't even get cancer. He just needed the occasional smoke to deal with the stress of being constantly in that fat bastard's shadow all the time, and just wanted to relax every once in a while.
He sighed, "Another-a-year of this. I-a-swear it, it's like-a-these games will never-a-end. Why can't-a-we just all get together and-a-play some cards or something? Aye-aye-aye."
"Hey, Luigi!" Someone said behind him, "How's it hanging'?" Luigi stood up straight and stomped out the cigarette with his shoe and spun around at attention, letting out a relieved sigh to see it was only Donkey Kong, his large goofy smile making Luigi feel a little less tense.
"Oh," He said, relieved, "Hi-a there Donkey Kong. I'm-a-fine, just a little bit-a-tense."
"Yeah, I know what ya mean Luigi," Donkey Kong crossed his arms, leaning against the pillar across from him, "Like, why can't every game just be like Mario Party or something? Hell, I'd settle for Mario Kart."
Luigi raised an eyebrow, "Last time we did-a-Mario Kart you almost-a-tore my arms off because of a blue shell."
DK shrugged, "Look if it makes you feel better I've long since forgiven you for doing that."
"I don't-a-think you see what I'm-a-getting at."
"Whatever," He patted the plumber on the back, Luigi having to regain his balance afterward, "Mario wants us to meet up in the waiting room before any matches start, just came here to tell ya."
Luigi sighed and stashed his pack and lighter in his overalls, "I'll be right-a-there!"
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Link sat on the bench in the room everyone was occupying, waiting, polishing his blade. All the while he was doing that, he realized there was someone staring him down in the seat next to him. He turned to face him and was surprised to see... what the hell was that? It was short, wore a green tunic and hat, and had a sword that looked just like Link's Master Sword, only tinier. His expression was that of one of those Japanese cartoons with the tiny characters in them, his mouth in a zigzag looking pattern and his eyes always wide like he's surprised.
Link raised an eyebrow and put his weapons down to sign, 'Can I help you?' The... thing continued to stare intently, leaning toward him. Link felt a little bit uncomfortable, so he scooted over to his right to distance himself a little. He continued to fiddle with his sword for a minute before looking left to see the thing scooted back toward him, continuing to stare. Link got up and put his weapon away and walked over to his princess, tapping her on the shoulder.
Zelda turned around to see Link. "Oh, what is it?" She asked, raising an eyebrow.
Link gestured over to the anomaly and signed, 'What is that thing, on the bench?'
It took Princess Zelda a moment to realize exactly what he was referring to. "Oh, you mean Toon Link?" Link didn't seem any more clarified on the matter, so the princess elaborated. "Well, it's hard to explain, but in a nutshell, he's you, but from another dimension where everything looks like- ...well, how he looks." Link looked back to 'Toon Link', and it was still glaring at him, its wide eyes haunting the Hero of Time. Taking into account all the horrible monsters he had seen in his life, that thing was by far the most unsettling.
'I don't know how I feel about this.' He signed, narrowing his eyes.
"Don't worry about him, I doubt you'll have to interact with him that much. After all, this is a huge roster and all." Link conceded with a shrug and went somewhere else to relax. Somewhere that thing wasn't.
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"But Ganondorf, I don't think you fully understand." Captain Falcon said, "You and I are very similar when it comes to fighting, so I believe that should make us friends, right?"
The evil king groaned. For the past several minutes, Cap had been bugging him nonstop about how they should "totally team up" and "wear matching friendship bracelets" and so on. It almost made him wish Link would just kill him with the Master Sword so that he could just perish and not have to listen to the f-racer's insistent prattling. "I'm only going to say this one more time," Ganon pinched the bridge of his nose; "You and I are NOTHING alike!"
"Sure we are!" Cap said, "Like uh, our up-tilts! With the heel smashing thing."
"It's called the Volcano Kick, you filthy heathen."
"Yeah, that thing. Mine is just way better because I don't have to wait for it. Not to say yours isn't awesome because it totally is! I'm just saying..."
Falcon continued to ramble about it for a long time while Ganon thought about how he would oh so enjoy the sweet embrace of death. 'Gah, it's like listening to a broken record. And then having said broken record shatter on the ground and having the shards lodged into your ears. Actually, that would be rather pleasant compared to this.'
"...And then there's the whole thing with the Master Hand, you know? I've heard it's actually like some kind of ball thing with black stuff all around it or something. It's called the Master Center or something, Master Core? Master Nucleus? Master-"
Ganon raised his head, "Wait, what was that about the Master Core?"
Falcon was snapped out of his trance, "Oh, the Master Core, that's it! Anyway, it's like this ball thing, right? And it holds infinite power or something. Man, I wish I could have infinite power like that; maybe I could use it to be a superhero! Well, I guess in a way I am kind of a superhero. But with infinite power, I could be like a, uh, super... DUPER hero!"
Ganon sat in disbelief. 'A source of infinite power? One that anybody could get to? And it's surrounded by these jabbering oafs? If I had that kind of power I wouldn't even NEED the Triforce!' "Say, human. Where exactly could I find this 'Master Core'?"
"I dunno, I think at the end of Classic Mode. And only if you make it, like, really hard for yourself by tipping the scale a bunch."
Ganon began to chuckle. The chuckle didn't take too long to turn into a full on laugh. Captain Falcon didn't really know why he was laughing, so he laughed along to make sure he didn't feel awkward. After a minute of uninterrupted laughter, Ganon stood up and walked out of the room.
"Where are you going, Ganondorf?" Cap said, "Mario's going to be here soon for the meeting, you don't want to miss it do you?"
"Oh don't worry, mortal." Ganon turned to leave, "I have my own meeting to attend."
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