Author's Note: Breath mints became my best friend when I started drinking out with friends four years ago – but I hate the stuff. T_T I hate mentos unless it's fruity flavoured or something. But this fic has got nothing to do with me – this was just inspired from a random thought while staring into space. ^_^; Anyhoo, read and enjoy! Don't forget to review! No flames, please – but critiques are welcome!
Pairing(s): AmericaxEngland / AlfredxArthur
Genre(s): Romance, Humor
Warning(s): Yaoi, Human Names, Out of Character Behavior
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction and as much as I want to, Hetalia Axis Powers belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya – not me. Hetalia would be IDK, R-18 if I owned it. xD
"Minty Fresh"
"Good God, Alfred – did you brush your teeth this morning?" Arthur coughed, his eyes stinging at the foul odour coming from his former charge.
"Dude, it's just the smell of burgers, soda and a bunch o' other stuff." Alfred replied with a roll of his eyes. Seriously, Arthur could be so damned uptight.
"I don't bloody care what you ate," Arthur said, shuddering at the thought of whatever Alfred meant by 'a bunch of other stuff'. "Just go brush your teeth!"
Alfred puffed his cheeks and frowned, though it was more like a pout than a frown. He folded his arms on his chest, very much looking like a child deprived of something. "I'm not a child, anymore! Don't tell me what to do – I can handle myself!"
Arthur wanted to roll his eyes. Alfred was making such a big point of his maturity by sulking like how he'd done centuries ago when he was still Arthur's charge – he wasn't a tiny bit childish, really.
If it were someone else, Arthur would've whacked them with a stick or something, insisting that they go to the washroom and brush their pearly whites to a pearly white – but this was Alfred and Arthur had a special spot for the bastard. He'd be hitting the bastard with another kind of stick and—
Arthur mentally slapped himself, his thoughts were always flying towards those and that whenever he was faced with Alfred. He needed to control himself and make sure the younger nation didn't disgrace his fifty-states.
"—And I brushed my teeth before leaving this morning!" But even if that were so, Arthur was ninety percent sure Alfred had stopped by the dozen fast food chains along the way to the office.
"All right, fine." Arthur finally gave in but was rummaging through his pockets. Seconds later, he fished out a round candy and presented it to Alfred.
"What is that?" Alfred asked with a cock of his eyebrow.
"It's what you call a breath mint, you arse." Arthur answered as he unwrapped it.
"Wha–" As soon as the American's mouth was opened, Arthur shoved the candy in. "Ewww!"
"Good God, Alfred – it's just a breath mint!" Arthur gasped, shaking his head. Didn't he raise this arse to be a perfect gentleman? Where the hell did he go wrong?
"It's dis-freaking-gusting!" Alfred whined then spat out the horrible candy.
"Y-You git!" Arthur hissed, "Why did you do that?"
"It was disgusting!" Alfred stuck his tongue out and took out a pack of seaweed flavoured tape gum from his pocket, which he then unrolled and ate.
"Want some?" Arthur stared at the suspicious looking thing, wondered if it was edible but decided it wasn't as he felt like slapping himself. Where the bloody hell did go wrong?
"No!" He hissed out then began to nag, "Spit that – thing out this instant! Damnation, what the bloody hell is that anyway?"
"It's candy." Alfred said with a shrug, his brows furrowed in annoyance. "And I'm not spitting this out – it's good, rare stuff!"
Arthur slapped himself on the forehead, "Good merciful God, where the bloody hell did I go wrong with this arse?"
Alfred found it funny and entertaining when Arthur got that frustrated. Truthfully, his main reason for buying the gum was to piss Arthur off, the taste and its rarity was the second reason. He enjoyed teasing his former guardian, it made him open and defenceless – it was very un-heroic of him, but Arthur was exempted to some rules.
"Must be when you ran around the house naked." Alfred laughed, unable to forget that night when Arthur arrived home, drunk and ran around the house naked because France took his clothing the moment he dumped the Englishman on Alfred's doorstep.
"A present for you, garcon!" Francis had chuckled while a teenage Alfred stared at him with wide eyes then to the drunk naked man on the stone steps. "Do take care of him. bonne nuit!"
All breath and vocabulary left Alfred as Francis left. There was Arthur, his guardian, drunk on the doorstep – and hell, the man was butt naked! And what a fine butt it was, indeed.
"Alfred..." The drunk slurred as he grabbed the teenager's legs and wrapped his arms around them. "Alfred... My cute Alfred... My Alfred... My one and only Alfred..."
That night, Alfred had finally gotten rid of his blue ball syndrome from cleaning and dressing Arthur off. It was just fucking sad the man wasn't drunk enough to jump on him and do as he – they – pleased.
Alfred went hard at the memory – Arthur was rightfully the perverted ambassador. He was sexy as hell and Alfred was one lucky bastard to own the guy.
Arthur glared at the grinning boy, that night had been the first time he'd let his guard down in front of Alfred. Now, thinking about it – it must've been that night of carelessness that made Alfred lose his trust on him and rebel. I mean, Alfred used to believe every single thing Arthur told him – even unicorns and fairies!
But now, look at him – Alfred was full grown and didn't believe in fairies. Instead, he believed in aliens – and he calls me weird, Arthur thought. He was a grown man but he cried like a baby when it comes to ghosts. He ate rubbish, he drove like a mad man, he—
– And he didn't bother hiding the bulge between his pants. To add to the list, Alfred was a sex-addict but Arthur really didn't mind that part with him being the pervert ambassador and all.
Then it hit him. He was going to make Alfred love using breath mints.
Alfred squinted his eyes suspiciously as Arthur broke into an excited grin. He knew the latter just had an idea but the way he was pulling out his pockets was suspicious. Alfred was certain that whatever idea had hit his lover, it had something to do with the both of them and sex.
When Alfred took a step towards Arthur, the Englishman raised his head to look at the American then smirked. Arthur walked over towards Alfred, placing his hands flat on his lover's chest as he gently pushed the younger nation towards the office chair. Alfred stopped, cornered between Arthur and the chair but was gently but forcefully pushed down to sit on the leather seat.
"Arthur, what are you planning?" Alfred asked, licking his lips as he looked at his smirking lover. A bystander would say that Arthur looked scary but contrary to Alfred, it only excited him.
Arthur bent his knee, placing it on the space between Alfred's legs on the chair just below the younger nation's crotch. "To teach you a lesson."
Somehow, Arthur had gotten hold of a bag of breath mints and for a second, Alfred feared the possibility of Arthur shoving the candy down his throat – but then again, he thought, if Arthur shoved it down with his lips, he wouldn't mind it much. In fact, Alfred childishly grinned at the thought.
"If you're thinking I'm shoving these down your throat –" Arthur began and popped five candies into his mouth then chewed down on them. "–Then, you've got another thing coming."
Popping another five into his mouth, Arthur pulled his knee from between Alfred's legs and now, knelt before Alfred. The breath mints were already stinging his eyes, small drops of tears forming at the sides but Arthur chose to ignore them and concentrated on his lesson. He unzipped Alfred's pants and pulled it down along with the star-spangled boxers, freeing Alfred's erection from any constraints.
Arthur held it in place with one hand and bent his head down – Alfred's eyes widened, he was about to tell Arthur to stop but at that same moment, Arthur had the head in his mouth. What was supposed to come out as a warning, came out as a pleasured hiss, "Arthur!"
Arthur was pleased with the reaction and guessed from the way Alfred's hands clutched on his shoulders, the blue-eyed blonde was going to beg him to stop. When hell freezes! Arthur thought – there was no bloody way he was going to stop now.
He twirled his tongue around the head as he gently sucked, putting more saliva and moisture to it. He could feel Alfred hardening under his touch and it gave him such pride, that with just his tongue, the young buck got this hard.
"A-Arthur..." Alfred panted. Sweet Jesus!
Arthur took out his mouth and looked at Alfred, "What's that? Deeper?"
Alfred's eyes widened, "N-No – ohhhh... Gooood..."
One week later...
"Arthur!" Alfred's voice echoed through the halls and Arthur swore his knees were shaking.
The door slammed open and Arthur held down the yelp that was about to jump out from him.
"Aha! Found you!" Alfred grinned and Arthur saw that he was carrying a large bag of mint candy. "Look what I got, Artie!"
Hell's bells. The bastard didn't need to shake the fiendish bag to his face.
"Dude, on your knees, now!" Alfred ordered after he slammed the door shut behind him.
Oh hell. Arthur wanted to jump out the window –
"Hey, man, what's wrong with you?" Alfred asked, placing a hand on Arthur's shoulder and foced the green-eyed blonde down to his knees. "There, you go – now, saw 'ahhh', baby."
– he created a monster!
The End
Author's Note: OTL I fail. T_T I was going to write a lemon but it sucked – and every time I write yaoi lemon, I fall asleep in the middle of it. I dunno why. T_T
BTW, I just got FUNi's dub for Hetalia (yeah, late I know). It's nice and all – but I'm still freaked out with Alfred's chibi voice, Belarus' voice and France/Francis. For Alfred, I look at that adorable chibi but I see Honey-sempai. Belarus must be Renge's relative or something. Kyouya with a French accent must sound like Francis. I bet. (And Renge lived in France before invading Japan. XD)
Renge: Marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me...
Kyouya: Oui, mademoiselle.
Like, shoot me. OTL
(Guys, I challenge ya'll to read fics with chibi!America and read it with Honey-sempai's English dub voice! It's freaky-ish.)
Don't forget to review! No flames, please – but critiques are welcome!