PoA: Don't eat me alive. I'm just a helpless writer straying into another territory by request! No murdering me, please?

*Silence*

PoA: I see. Well, if that's how you want to play it, I shall unleash the beast!

-l-

Who, What and When Did I Forget?

-l-

"Glooooooooobox!"

He wondered if he had just dozed off again. Probably just ate too much and took a long nap in the woods. As long as he hadn't drunken any plum juice, or gotten captured by pirates, or popped by a buzz rocke-wait… Who did he leave him with last?

"The teensies." Gulping hard he shouted again "Gloooooooooboooo-"

"Now now, what the Sax's all the hullaballoo, Rayman?" A creaking voice piped up.

Rayman saw two long blue nosed creatures rubbing their sore ears, one sitting on the other's shoulders. The uppermost and current 'king' of these strange and magical beings tipped his paper-thin crown to the equally peculiar hero. Though respectful as always, they ‒ like every other 'who's it' and 'what's it' in the Glade of Dreams ‒ could be mischievous little devils. No telling what that glowing light hiding beneath the lower teensie's robe was.

"I'm just looking for my friend." Rayman answered honestly, trying not to reveal that he was actively inching away. A little chuckle of real fear came out, when he saw that distorted smile of impending violence on the temporary king's face.

"Well, say! That's not a face I've seen recently, but you'll stay for a moment anyway, won't you? We've something marvelous for you to see!" A nasally laugh of sinister joy came out as the servant's robe began to glow brighter. Not the red of a rocket, but an eerie, pale bluish white light of solar might.

"O-Oh! Heh-heh. Um, well… thanks, but no thanks! I'm not really up for a round right now. Really… Ok? Guys? Um…" They really didn't seem to be listening, as both kept on sauntering forward. Their pace quickened when they saw his eagerness to keep the distance between them wide. Their increasingly excited giggles of joy and hastened steps soon sent the hero running for the hills.

Charging up nearest path, Rayman mounted one of the last remaining walking shells left from the pirate invasion. Untamed, the bucking case of gunpowder took off, taking the poor hero rocketing up a treacherous path of jagged rocks and slippery slopes. In the distance, he could see the wizardly duo shouting after him, something to the effect of "Take hits! Hits from me, more pantomime's bay! You can't escape hurt for never, Rameeeeen!"

Whatever that meant, the answer was no, no and no! He just wanted to see his friend for some good, clean, non-explosive fun. Too bad the shell had other ideas: Having successfully bucked him off, the crazed powder keg with legs wobbled on in for the kill. The impact made the hero a star over an early night sky. The new view at least confirmed that the transitional monarchy of two would be hard pressed to pursue.

Hoping the long expected landing wouldn't hurt too badly, he took a nap amidst the sea of dancing lums. It would've remained peaceful like this, had one red renegade not interrupted his snoring with an uninvited expedition down his throat. Waking up with a choking gasp, Rayman instinctively swatted at the newly regurgitated light. This act unfortunately turned the frightened ball of red healing, black, which in turn caused it to bite down on the widest target available.

He shook to get the beastie off his nose, but to no avail as he collided with the greenery below. For some odd reason, the twisted lum found the sight of a partially burnt, crumpled mass of limbs funny; reverting back to a red lum, it provided its previous victim with some much needed recovery from his fall.

Back on his feet, like a man on a mission, Rayman took off for the nearest clearing to get his bearings. He found himself a bit farther from Globox's house than expected, but with no further interruptions, he would make it there before the dead of night set in. As it's said, being out in the dead of night tended to fill the night with dead, so perhaps a quickened pace was in order. Yes again, with no further interruptions. Surely, this wouldn't jinx anything.

"RAYMAN!" That was the last thing he heard before a big foot from Bigfoot himself pressed him out like a pancake. No matter, at least he could re-inflate while taking solace in the fact that this hulking behemoth didn't mean him any actual harm.

"Oh gee. Sorry 'bout that, little buddy." The kindly cavemannish man creature said, sincerely believing he was helping when he tried to fan out the flattened hero. Through gibberish and a flapping tongue, Rayman eventually convinced the giant to stop 'helping' long enough to catch his breath. When he could form some fashion of words, he explained the strange events that had led him under Clark's foot.

"Well that sounds awful, little guy, but are you extra sure you heard 'em right? Maybe they just drank too much of something good that made 'em go bad."

Rayman tried to assure the giant that the teensies were solely and sanely out to fry him with large white lasers, but the friendly simpleton wasn't convinced. Not that he knew anything about the Arena. Perhaps given that Clark was just being Clark, and that one as strong as Clark would go all 'Clark' if he had known, this was probably for the best.

"I'd like to help ya, but I've got a big job right now. It's kinda special though, so I can't talk about it." It wasn't like him to keep secrets, but out of respect and thankfulness for no intentional abuse done, Rayman let it go.

Still more than determined to have fun, the limb-free savoir would be darned if some mishaps were going to delay him any longer. So, he mistakenly asked for some immediate assistance, something that involved more positively painful catapulting. It was a gamble, but it beat getting pecked to death by the night of the living, dead cursed chickens of yore.

"Really? I think they give good back scratches, but if you say so." Picking up his smaller friend, the giant did what any true friend would do: Fling him, by request, towards the rising blue moon "Hang on tight!" He warned, albeit too late as the living projectile had already left his bulky hands.

Screaming through the air, figuratively and quite literally, he didn't have the same urge to rest as before. Still, the trip was long, and tomorrow came without much incident; that is to say, no zapping, no biting and no pecking. Now the new day could start in earnest. Even if Globox had been too busy with his few, several, six hundred-or-so-hundred kids, he'd surely be over them by now and ready for a day of lazy fun and adventure!

L

*A little fast-forward later*

L

"I'm sorry, Rayman, but my darling isn't here." And with that, Uglette and the kids had really rained on his parade, especially when the oldest tyke started to show off his 'cool family dance'. Having come all the way here through perils and predicaments galore, he'd have to spend the rest of the day alone once more.

"Now dear, I have a fun-fun-fantastic idea!" The frog-like lady said, delightedly clapping her webbed hands.

Really? Could any idea be that fun or fantastic? Unless, she meant…with several hundred kids…all crying for nurture and flies…with hubby far away…that old uncle Rayman had come over just in time to say "NO! Ahh…I-I mean… I have a, really, really, REALLY busy day planned, Uglette! I don't have the time to-"

"Not even to stop by and say hello, dear? After all the trouble…" She cocked her head with a wondering look in her eyes, which suddenly turned really sour, really fast. Now crossing her rubbery arms with huffy indigence, Uglette's never-before-seen temper lit up the sky with a full-on thunderstorm "Are you just a potato with hair, an eggplant with attitude, a bush with a big nose, or is there a man in RAYMAN?"

What little hair he did have was now standing on edge, making him an unwilling conductor for the wrath of an angered whatever-her-species-was and her rumblings. Good thing he'd quit biting his nails when he got scared, otherwise he'd have been a mass of tooth-splintered fingers by now. Shivering like a wet puppy at any rate, he feebly raised a damp hand and answered "All three and yes?"

So… Uglette was not amused, and thus she lit a tuft of his hairy helicopter on fire. Fortunately, it wasn't enough to burn down the whole forest, but it did give him a moment to shut up before she made a real cooked vegetable out of him.

Tugging on his arm, one of the little sister babies whispered fairly loudly "Mama's super scary sometimes. I think it's cuz you forgot to give someone a heart."

"Huh? What does she mean? Uglette, did I do something wrong?" Now he tried to sound concerned, and so the storm over his head subsided. Oddly enough, only he had gotten dampened by the downpour, but he guessed that she must've had some good reasons. Unless of course this was actually Globox in disguise using a fairly good girl's voice. The thought wasn't that farfetched.

"Rayman, what did you do three days ago?" She asked, very seriously, almost negating the Globox theory. The guy could be funny, even clever, but only a select few had a tone like that. Only the toughest and most serious of his friends could sound that way; like Polokus ‒ when he's not bubbling on pipes and dreaming ‒ Betilla, Ly, the Magician ‒ sort of, maybe, when he isn't being a Mr. Dark fanboy, or maybe not ‒ and sometimes…

Hold on, off topic. What about three days ago? What was that day? It was…ah! That's right! It was the day, before the day, before yesterday! So, what then? Was there something special about that? Days in the Glade of Dreams all ran together anyway. Sometimes he wondered if they had any seasons besides the fixed environments they lived in. Even so, what did it matter where they lived? Weren't they all just dreams anyway? What was the meaning of their existence? What does it mean to exist? What was the question again?

"RAYMAN!" Okay, that shook him back to reality. Now the crushing pressure that came along with it could stop any second now. He liked hugs, but getting a big one from Globox's wife seemed really out of place. The whole experience was making him see blue; a lot of blue, a lot of frog, a lot of blue frog like "GLOBOX, my fro-fr-friend!"

"Sorry I couldn't come see you. Globox had a special something to do." He put the hero down and welcomed the dog pile greeting of his frog-like kids. The big guy was so lucky, at least until the big ones got big enough to be a big pain in his family of bullfrog-like babies. Well, no buts about it, he still had a great thing going for him.

Then again, what had been so important that he hadn't seen Globox's rubbery gut in days? From the looks of things, he hadn't been shot flat or been under a tree snoozing, but apparently he had had 'something special' to do? Like what? He might've been peppering Murfy's toothpaste again, but he could've at least invited Rayman along for all the fun. Well, whatever he did, he had better not have gone to see Jano for their little deal. Rayman wanted to save their surprise guest star on the Rabbid's show for the season finale (ohh yes, it was going to be a scream).

"So, what's been keeping you?" He finally asked it straight, but the big blue baby just started shaking his head and putting a shushing finger to his lips. What was he scared of this time? Honestly, the only ones here were the kids, Uglette, the two of them, oh and Mr. Livingstone. A telescopic fist later: No more Mr. Livingstone.

"Oh, oooohhh, Uglette? Can I? Can I? Pleeeeease?" Globox begged and hopped around like patient boy trying to hold back a visit to the bushes.

"But dear, he hasn't given his gift yet! Rayman's been naughty and mean for not remembering!" She insisted, closing her eyes and looking away from her begging husband.

Now he was actually starting to feel bad. He didn't know what it was, but even the kids were starting to chide him; pointing at him, they chanted "Rayman doesn't give hearts. Rayman not being nice!" Sure Uglette and Globox chastised them, but it still made him feel like a heel of badly burnt, stale bread.

"Sorry guys, I guess I'll go now." Rayman hung his head and turned to take the walk of shame.

This was when good old Globox finally puffed up and shouted "No, Rayman not mean! Rayman save you and daddy lots of times, and is daddy's best friend! All of you apologize!" True to the father they loved, each of the babies came up and said sorry in unison. Patting the little guys and girls on the head, Rayman laughed as the oldest offered to show his dance again to make him feel better.

"Darling, Rayman didn't mean to be mean. He's just forgetful, not like me. Forgive him for me?" Uglette turned her long frown into a little smile when she saw her husband pout. Lightening up, she hopped on over to pat the hero's blonde tuft comfortingly. Rayman, in turn, was happy again, but still befuddled by what he supposedly had or hadn't done.

"Rayman, do you know what happened the third yesterday ago?" She asked again, still getting a 'no' response. She tried to jog his memory a little, asking the hero to remember back to what everyone else was doing that day.

"Uh, well, I was in the Arena. The teensies were spending a lot of time in Ly's Palace. They shot a buzz rocket at me when I tried to rescue Globox from them. Then I ran into that nasty Admiral, who was getting attacked by Razorwife ‒ something about him 'picking badly' I guess ‒ and then I saw one of your kids giving Tily something that looked like a red lum. And then I remembering seeing Ssssam talking to Bzzit and his mate, but, uh…that's it."

"Wha‒? But, Globox not need to get rescued! Globox make big plans with Grand Minimus!" After blurting this out, Uglette gave him a sharp look of curiosity, making him cover up that big mouth his.

This was starting to get out of hand. It's like everyone was hiding something from him! The teensies, the red lum, Clark, Uglette and now Globox! Well, maybe not the red lum; no, definitely not the lum. So why was everyone else being all secretive? Was it his birthday? No, Betilla always reminded him when it was (though he still can't quite remember it)! And what's all this 'heart' nonsense? Why would he give a heart? He might not even have a heart! He didn't even have ARMS!

"Globox, dearie. I suppose we can give Rayman his second heart." Oh! So Globox had to give him a heart first? Wait, she said 'second heart'. Where was the first, and if what he suspected was true, how could he have given a heart sooner? Was it like a something that you had to give to another someone for some reason? Like some kind of hot potato game, then? Maybe Globox forgot to give him his and so he couldn't play the game right. This meant it was Globox's fault, right? He hoped he wouldn't lose the 'something giving game' just because his friend had goofed up.

"Okay! Rayman!" Globox announced triumphantly, opening his mouth and pulling out a silly colored box "Here's your heart! Happy Heart-of-Mine Day!"

Rayman, though still kind of peeved that he'd been left out of the game, still happily took the box and opened it. Inside the kiddy colored wrapping was…a new scarf? Well, it didn't fit, but it was still cute and all, he guessed. Not really wanting make anyone sad or mad, he thanked Globox for the 'super cool' gift.

"No, no, no! Not mine! Globox not get you that!" Eh? Say what? So, who was the gift from then? After asking outright, the only answer he received was "It's a secret heart, from your secret vampire!"

"Oh dear, you have a secret admirer." Uglette correctively congratulated Rayman, and not a moment too soon.

So instead of a blood sucking two-legged cousin of Moskito, it was someone who admired him? So, not to be an ego with a snide sunny side of pride, but that pretty much included the whole wide weave of the Glade of Dreams, didn't it? Really, 'who wouldn't it be' would have been a better question, yes? And how was this scarf thingy a 'heart' anyway? This game was starting to get weirder by the second.

"Now you have one heart." Globox said before clapping and pointing over to his wife with excitement "See? See the pretty bow? Globox made that himself! It's my heart for my darling Uglette!" She blushed sweetly and showed off a surprisingly well-crafted bow of plum violet.

Ah, so it was a gift… called a heart? That didn't make a lot of sense. Sure it was cute and all and he really had no idea that Globox could sew, but so what? What'd this have to do with him? The scarf was alright, but a little tight, but somehow he needed it to play the game? Did this mean he had to make something for a friend of his? Like what? This was already starting to sound like a chore.

"Rayman not remember to give a heart. That's okay though! Globox will help! Globox help you find someone to give a heart to! Better a late start than no heart!" He was happy about it ‒ a little too happy ‒ and it didn't make a lot of sense.

Rayman, being the simple guy he was, just shrugged widely and asked "But why? I mean, do I have to?" He wasn't trying to be mean, but having to give gifts because it just so happened to be some random day was just silly. When his birthday came up, he just liked hanging out with friends, eating too many berries and fruits and sleeping. It was the same as any other day, basically. Sure yeah, he got Globox that shirt that looked like his for his birthday, but that's because he wanted to. This whole 'Heart-of-Mine Day' deal was beginning to smell like serious red robot rum to him.

Globox scratched his head over original the question and thought, really, really hard about it. Eventually, he came up with an explanation of sorts "Well, no, I guess you don't have to give a heart. When someone's nice to you, you don't have to be nice back, bu-but we like to be nice to the people we like, right? Someone was being nice when they gave you that puffy scarf, right? Don't you feel like being nice back, or isn't there someone else you'd like to be nice to?"

"Yeah I mean, sure, I guess. I don't know." Rayman's floating hand scratched his head in puzzlement "But Globox, I don't have anything for you today. I'm sorry but-"

Once again, Globox shook his head and waved his hands "Not like Globox. Someone you like sort of different. Like how Globox like Uglette, or like how a mama Globox like a baby Globox."

Just then, even with that bit of a gender mix-up, a little light bulb flickered on inside of Rayman's head as he snapped his fingers and announced "Oh, I get it! Like someone you love, or really, REALLY like, right? Like family or better?" Both parents nodded while their little girl again whispered audibly "He's not very fast, is he mama?"

Uglette hushed her child stiffly, and smiled back at Rayman "Yes, Rayman dear, just like that." Sighing a little bit and pausing, she looked to be wiping away a little tear as she said "It's just so sad when someone puts their heart into being nice, only to be rejected."

Rejected? Who? Did she mean that he had rejected someone's gift? B-But the scarf! He just received it! How could he have known about the gift when it was being digested in his best friend's stomach? And he didn't reject it, see? He was wearing it! So, what did he do wrong?

"RAYYYYMAAAN!"

Oh no…no, no, no, no, no, NO! They'd found him. He didn't know how, but they'd found him.

"RUN FOR IT, GLOBOOOOX!"

-l-

To be continued

-l-

In the chapter I'm uploading a second from now! Sorry! I didn't feel like fitting 6K+ words into one chapter!

Until two seconds from now!