Disclaimer: I don't own ANYTHING! Harry Potter is JK Rowlings, but how I wish it were mine. The song at the begining is from the musical Wicked! it is called Defying Gravity.

But I Love Him

Something has changed within me,

Something is not the same,

I'm through with playing by the rules,

Of someone else's game.

Too late for second-guessing,

Too late to go back to sleep,

It's time to trust my instincts,

Close my eyes and leap.

A/N: Okay, this was an idea that came to me and wouldn't leave, so what did I do? I sat down with my laptop and jotted it down. I promise to go back to Barely Holding On, in fact the next chapter is nearly ready, but this just wouldn't leave me alone, so I had to write it. You know how it is…So, please, read and review, I thrive on reviews.

Hermione Weasley sat in the cozy living room of the Burrow, reading her favorite Muggle book, Jane Eyre. Her husband, Ron, was abroad on another Auror assignment for the Ministry. Her two month old daughter was suffering from colic and she had jumped at her mother-in-law's offer to stay at the Burrow until Ron returned. She was currently enjoying a pleasant, peaceful evening when he came in. She knew he was there before he uttered a word. Awareness tickled up her spine as she raised her eyes to his. His normal hazel-blue eyes were pitch black and frantic, an inhuman amber hue tinging the dialated pupils. She knew instantly, this was not Bill who stood before her, this was the wolf. She stood up cautiously, remembering only too late that tonight was a full moon. Her movement seemed to propel him forward. "Bill!" she gasped as his body pressed against hers, pinning her to the wall. A guttural growl escaped his lips just below her ear.

"What are you doing here?" he rasped against her neck, trailing kissed from chin to shoulder.

"Rose…Rose is sick," she gasped as he nipped at her neck.

He pulled back slightly, his body shaking with the effort. Behind the lust, she could see a hint of worry in his eyes. "What's wrong with her?" he asked, a slight tremble in his voice.

"Colic," she whispered. She watched the worry fade from his eyes.

"We had that problem with Victoire. Don't worry, it will pass," he told her, his voice filled with desire.

"Bill, why are you here?" she asked, hoping to distract him.

"Fleur," he growled. "She wants me as far away as possible during the full moon, or did you forget?" he murmured against her throat, resuming his ministrations.

She had not forgotten. It was what had brought them together in the first place. Bill couldn't control himself during the full moon. He was wild. He couldn't completely transform, but he wasn't entirely human either. His body and mind were trapped somewhere in limbo, not completely human, not completely wolf, but in Fleur's eyes a monster. Hermione's heart ached for the poor man. She had wanted so bad to help him, to ease his pain, to erase the hurt in his eyes that first time. She had only meant to talk to him. Everything had been fine until the sun set. She had watched the change come over him. His eyes had darkened, then they had taken on that inhuman amber hue. He had warned her. He had told her to leave before he did something he would regret. Maybe she should have listened, but she hadn't. Instead she had done the worst possible thing, she had reached out for him. He had taken her there on the floor of the Burrow. It had been wild and untamed, almost animalistic. She had lost herself in the sheer power she felt from him. He was demanding and rough, two things Ron never was. She shouldn't have enjoyed it but she did. When it was over, Bill was almost calm, a blessed release from the normal frantic nights he was used to. She had sworn it would not happen again, but it did. Not only once, but many times. Every month, in fact. Every month for seven years. Every month until she found out she was pregnant, pregnant with her brother-in-law's baby. That had been her wake up call. She had told him they had to stop and then she had left. She knew Bill loved his family and she knew he would never tell Ron the truth. Rose would always be Ron Weasley's daughter.

Bill's rough hands brought her back to the present. They had traveled up from her hips, grazing just underneath her thick jumper. "Bill, we can't do this," she pleaded with him. His right thumb slipped below the waist band of her trousers, his left hand roaming higher to graze the underside of her right breast. His lips trailed hungry kisses up her neck then across her jaw to her parted lips.

"Then stop me," he whispered against her lips before pressing his own roughly against her. She gasped into his mouth, her hands moving involuntarily to his shoulders, griping them tightly. He pressed his hips against hers, allowing her to feel his arousal. She whimpered as his tongue lashed out requesting entrance. She parted her lips to allow him in. His tongue danced in and out of her mouth, his teeth nipping at her swollen lips. She would not stop him, she was lost once again to the beast inside of him.

"Bill," she gasped, pulling back sharply. "We can't…not here…your mother," she stumbled over her words, desire clouding her mind. Quickly he grabbed her hand before pulling her up the stairs to his old room. He opened the door and shoved her in, closing the door quickly behind him. He pulled out his wand and cast several charms on the door, making sure no one could hear them or disturb them. He grabbed her hips and pushed her up against the wall.

"Better?" he growled before devouring her lips again. She could only whimper. He roughly grabbed her hips, grounding his erection into her stomach. "I want you, now," he told her. She swallowed her objection at the lust she saw in his eyes. Those eyes could melt her to her core. She nodded, wrapping her arms around his neck. He hoisted her up, urging her to wrap her legs around his waist. She complied, pulling him tightly against her. She groaned as he ground his hips into hers.

Bill carried her over to his bed, dropping her roughly onto the faded quilt. He ripped his shirt off over his head before shoving her back on the bed. He crawled over her, peering down at her fearful face. He leaned close so he could whisper in her ear. "I am going to make you scream." She shivered with anticipation at his words. He gently ran one hand down the front of her jumper. "One of my mum's," he murmured before ripping it violently. She gasped at the sudden reminder of his inhuman strength. His gaze lingered on her chest. She felt self-conscious for a moment. Her breasts were larger than the last time they had been together. Her whole body had changed. She didn't have any stretch marks on her stomach, but her breasts were covered in them, she blamed it on nursing Rose. Her stomach wasn't as flat as it used to be and her hips were much wider than before. Bill didn't seem to mind though as he continued to take in everything about her appearance. "Gods you are hot," he told her, his hands making short work of her bra clasps.

"Bill," she whimpered as she lay there, completely nude from the waist up. She was starting to feel rather foolish, the only thing she could seem to come up with to say was "Bill." He didn't seem to mind though. He moved his mouth down to suckle her taught nipple. His left hand trailed down her stomach to stop at the button to her trousers. He made short work of her button and zipper, quickly tugging them down to her ankles. She kicked them the rest of the way off. Her own hands fumbled with his belt then his buttons and zipper. He growled and shoved her hands away, ridding himself of his trousers. He returned his mouth to her pink peaks while his hand trailed up her right thigh, his thumb brushing gently against her moist center. She gasped when she felt the light brushing of his fingers. His mouth returned to hers, his kisses demanding. He pressed her thighs further apart. He slowly moved down her body, kissing every inch he could reach. He looped his fingers in the waistband of her lacy underpants, slipping them off to leave her completely nude.

"Beautiful," he growled. He dipped his head down between her legs. She moaned when she felt his hot breath against her wet core. His tongue flicked out to lick her tender clit. He gently pressed one finger into her as he continued to lick and suck on her swollen nub. She could feel the pleasure mount as his fingers and lips continued to move. Bill pulled back just before she could come and smiled evilly. "Not yet," he whispered.

Bill pushed his boxers off and covered her body with his. Not giving her time to object, he thrust into her. She cried out as his large erection filled her tight sheath. He began to thrust wildly into her wetness, not even trying for control any longer. The slight pain at the beginning gave way to waves of pleasure. It took only a few thrusts to bring her over the edge. She cried his name as she came, her muscles clenching tightly around him. He roughly pulled out and turned her over. She was confused for a moment before she felt him slam into her again, this time from behind. His hands grasped her hips roughly as he thrust himself repeatedly into her. She could feel the pleasure mounting again. He slipped one hand around to flick her sensitive nub. She cried out as waves of pleasure crashed over her. She heard him call out her name as he came with her, spilling his seed deep into her womb. When their orgasms diminished, they both collapsed lifelessly onto his bed, gasping for breath.

It took a moment for Hermione to come back down to earth. When she finally came back to her senses, she froze. What the hell have I done? she thought to herself. She had given into him, again. She rolled onto her side to face Bill. He looked calm and at peace, so different from earlier. Her heart beat furiously against her rib cage when she realized exactly what she had done. She sat up abruptly and immediately began searching for her missing clothes. Bill slowly opened his eyes and watched her.

"Where are you going in such a hurry?" he asked.

"Where do you think!?" she snapped at him.

"Hermione, love, what's wrong. You aren't going to tell me you didn't want that. I'm not stupid, you sure didn't try to stop," he told her, his anger beginning to rise.

"Of course I didn't want that! You are my husband's brother! That cannot happen again! I will not hurt Ron like this," she told him frantically.

"Hermione, lie to me if you want, but don't lie to yourself. You want me. You can't deny it," he told her softly.

"Fine, Bill. Yes, I want you. But…I love him. That is the difference."

Fin