Dear Diary,
I have my blood lust under control. Damon, Elena, Caroline for g-d sakes everyone keeps telling me I don't. "I know you Stefan" they say. "We know how you can be". They need to back off. Although I hate their nagging I can't help but think they might have a point. Today I did something bad and although at the time I couldn't see how bad it was, I now realize that I might not be as "in control" as I keep telling myself I am. I stole 25 blood bags out of the freezer in the basements. Damon caught me but I ignored his warning and Elena noticed my changes in behaviour. I haven't felt like this like a ripper again in a long time. Since the 20s to be exact. It took me 50 years to recover and I had Lexi. It makes me angry when I think about Lexi because it reminds me that Damon killed her. Drove a stake through her heart and killed her. The only thing that can calm my anger is blood. Blood, Blood, Blood. I can't stop thinking about it one blood bag wouldn't hurt. At least it's a blood bag. I'm still good. I'm not ripping peoples heads off so I'm doing something right.