Hi, this is A.G.G.! Yes, I am well aware that this is rather weird, but I hope you like it anyway! It's what I imagine would happen if Luigi, Weegee and Mr L were together. It gets more humorous and absurd as it goes on, even though you could say the ending is a little on the sad side. Please keep in mind that this is a little unrealistic, there'll be no court cases or anything like that.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of Nintendo's characters. Without them, this fanfic wouldn't have been possible.
Princess Daisy's birthday was coming up. Everyone was excited and were planning a surprise party for her.
Everyone, that is, except for Luigi, her boyfriend. He was broke, as was Mario. No one needed a plumber at that moment in time, and there was no money coming in for the brothers. That meant Luigi couldn't buy a present for Daisy. She'd kill him if he turned up empty handed. She had a scary temper, and Luigi didn't want to deal with another tantrum.
He decided to take a walk through the towns of the Mushroom Kingdom. As he looked in at the shop windows, he couldn't help crying silently. He knew he was too old to be shedding tears, but he became emotional so easily.
So many presents she would like. An expensive tennis racket to replace her old one. Runners in her favourite colour, orange. Dainty little amber earrings.
Then, he saw the most beautiful pale yellow dress. Daisy would have loved it. It was short, unlike the long garments that she, as a princess, normally wore.
If only he had the money...
Luigi sighed. He was just about to head home, when suddenly a thought struck him.
What if he stole the dress?
He knew it was wrong, very wrong. But Daisy would probabaly break up with him if he didn't get her anything. Then again, with his luck, he'd most likely get caught.
Maybe he'd risk it, just this once.
He went into the shop and searched for the dress he'd seen. There it was!
He suddenly felt very nervous and started sweating. Just one grab and...
He ran. But since he had no experience with shoplifting, the tag on the dress beeped as he rushed through the sensors.
He could see all of the security men around him.
He was caught.
Weegee was on holidays in the Mushroom Kingdom. He had turned almost everyone in his home country into Weegee clones with his famous Weegee stare, but he wanted to build up his Weegee army even more. Of course, there was a small number of people who were immune to his stare. His wife, Daizeh, was one of them, as she was just as powerful as himself.
He knew about the Toads who lived there, and how childish they were. With luck, they wouldn't even know who he was!
He sat on the ground, pretending to be a beggar. He was waiting for a while before a kindly Toad couple approached him.
As they offered him a few gold coins, he looked them straight in the eye and they instantly transformed into Weegee clones. This was almost too easy.
Then he saw an elderly Toad walking with a human girl in a pink dress.
No. Anyone but her. He tried to run, but it was too late.
"Weegee!" gasped Princess Peach.
He desperately tried to stare her down, but since she was one of the seven star children, nothing happened to her.
He was caught.
Mr L was still seething in anger after that event years before. His high ego couldn't take defeat. And he was going to get them all back for it, especially Luigi.
He had rebuilt a better version of the previous Brobot, all by himself. He didn't need any help. What good had help done the last time?
Luigi was very powerful, more powerful than himself. It was because of Luigi that Mr L existed in the first place. He was Luigi's bad side. He knew of Luigi's occasional jealousy of Mario, his old desire to steal Peach from Mario (before he met Daisy), his wish to be the real hero and the more famous brother.
Except Mr L was going to be the villain, not the hero.
He was going to kill Luigi first, then Mario.
He arrived in the Mushroom Kingdom in his Brobot, stupidly forgetting that he was being extremely obvious.
A Toad saw him and rang the police. The police were around him in minutes.
He was caught.
Luigi, Weegee and Mr L were escorted to their cell. They were all found guilty, coincidentally at the same time, so they were sharing a cell.
Luigi and Mr L recognised each other instantly. Luigi gave Mr L a death stare, surprising him. It seemed like something he would do, not Luigi. Wait, but he was Luigi, a part of him anyway. Whatever Mr L did, Luigi was capable of doing it too.
Meanwhile, Luigi had his own worries to deal with. He turned around and saw Weegee, staring at him intently. He had heard of him, and he immediately looked down. It was possible that he was immune to the Weegee virus since he was a star child, but he wasn't taking any chances.
They went to their triple bunk bed and slept.
"Wimp," said Mr L, waking up Luigi. He had been crying loudly as he slept, and was keeping Mr L and Weegee up.
Luigi blushed. He got embarrassed to easily.
"Look, wimp, we're trying to get out of this prison. Wanna help?"
"I-I can't get out of prison. I-I'm too afraid!"
"Are you serious? You want to stay in here for years? Why are you in here anyway? Never thought you had the guts to be a criminal, heh heh."
"W-well, I robbed a dress..."
"Heh. I see you still have that old habit of cross dressing."
"I do not! It was for Daisy!"
"And not for Peach? I see you've moved on from her."
Luigi went red again. He felt terrible that he'd wanted to steal Mario's girlfriend at one point in his life.
"I have a plan," mumbled Weegee. The pair turned around in surprise. He hadn't said anything since the day before. They carefully avoided eye contact with him. "If a policeman passes our cell, I'll call him and stare him down. Once he turns into a clone of me, he'll be part of my army. And he'll free me!"
"What about us?" asked Mr L.
"You can free yourselves. I'm not your babysitter."
"Oh yeah? Have at you!"
Weegee and Mr L began to fight until Luigi separated them.
"Guys! Stop!"
They stopped, but the antagonism between them was obvious.
Eventually a few policemen passed. Weegee called out to them, but they walked on with their eyes lowered. The exact same thing happened time and time again.
"Did you stop to think that the police might know about your powers?" said Mr L sarcastically.
Weegee gave him a withering look, which he didn't see.
"Maybe I can flirt with the policewomen," said Mr L.
"Are you stupid?" retorted Luigi. "All of the guards are men here!"
"Looks like you're wrong."
Mr L had caught sight of a pretty policewoman and winked at her, saying, "Hey gorgeous."
"Nice try," she answered.
"Well that was lame," sneered Weegee.
"Have at you!"
Luigi was losing hope of ever getting out of there. There was a severe lack of teamwork! Suddenly he had an idea. It probably wouldn't work, but it was worth a try.
"Maybe Daisy can save us, when she comes to visit."
The other two burst out laughing.
"You think a girl is going to get us out of here?"
"Don't be sexist about my girl!" shouted Luigi. "She's as strong as any man!"
"Heh heh. That's if she's still your girl. Not sure if she'd like a prisoner for a sweetheart. Unless she likes the bad boys, that is."
Luigi looked ready to fight Mr L.
"Heh heh. Your bad side is really showing, Luigi. You're starting to act more and more like me."
Luigi growled. The night ended with the three men on the floor fighting.
A couple of days later, Daisy came to visit.
"Wow, you got yourself a chick, Luigi!" exclaimed Mr L.
Daisy stared at Mr L for a long moment before saying hello to Luigi.
"Hey gorgeous," smirked Mr L.
To Luigi's horror, she blushed and smiled. He'd never seen her go red before. She then proceeded to yell at Luigi for what he'd done, reducing him to tears.
He watched as Mr L flirted with his princess, his girlfriend. He watched as Daisy enjoyed the compliments he showered her with. He watched as she gave Mr L her number and smiled provocatively, while barely saying goodbye to Luigi.
He confronted Mr L afterwards.
"How dare you!"
"Chill, Luigi. Not my fault if she likes the bad boys better, huh? Looks like I was right after all. Pity she picked the wrong bad guy. Heh heh. Kinda hard to believe that we look the same, yet I'm so obviously the sexiest."
"You stole my girl. I hate you!"
"Please. Is that all you've got? Don't you have a better comeback? I'm surprised a wimp like you got her in the first place. She's not as sexy as Peach, but she's still too hot for the likes of you. She's clearly out of your league."
Luigi was going crazier every day. Yes, he had only been here for three days, but that was beside the point. Mr L was right. He was slowly but surely turning into his evil counterpart.
This was going to be his life for the next few years. No girlfriend. A bad reputation. Stuck with people he hated. Fights every day. Stripped of his titles.
Yes, that pretty much summed up his bleak future. And it was all because he had wanted to make his girl happy, a girl who didn't even care about him anymore.
Well, that's it. Like I said above, it kind of got a bit depressing towards the end. Sorry about that. So, what did you think? Is there anything that you think needs to be changed? Let me know in the reviews!