Hello everyone~

I had this story in my head for a long time and I finally decided to work on it. It's my first attempt at writing in English, but I have two amazing beta readers, TeaAndUmbrellas and bornpuppetdiedcrying. You guys are amazing!

Some warnings first: it is indeed a Sabriel and Destiel fanfiction. But because I start at season 1, there's a lot of mentions about Sam and Jess' relationship. Also, as I said, it starts at the first season and I'll rewrite all the show until s7. Expect some spoilers.

I hope you guys'll like this story!

Title song is '(Don't Fear) The Reaper' by Blue Öyster Cult.

When Dean came to bring Sammy back on the road again to look for their father, there were a couple of things that he didn't expect. Seeing Sam settled, with a girl and a nice place to live? Sure, it made him happy. It was his baby brother after all and if Sam was fully happy, so was he. But then again, he hadn't expected it. Then he met Jess and she was smart, pretty and very nice. She let Sam go with him even though she barely knew who he was or why they had to go after their father. She was a really nice girl.

Sam had never seemed more relaxed and satisfied than he was then. When they got in the car, his brother still had a goofy smile on his face and he looked back to his apartment where Jess was waving at him. Dean choose not to comment but he couldn't stop his dark thoughts. The kid was too much attached to Blondie and when she leaves him (because they always leave), he was going to fall apart. The older Winchester hoped that it wouldn't happen until much time passed.

When they stumbled across the hunt with the Woman in White, it felt like old times. They moved easily around each other, Sam having his back as usual and the hunt was definitely a success. Well, they didn't find their father, but there was still hope for him to be safe and sound, so Dean still counted it as a win. Maybe he was a little disappointed when Sammy asked to go back. But then his baby brother offered him to stay for a couple of days, so he could try to get to know Jess and the life their father had given up so easily.

The ride went fast, the both of them smiling and humming softly to Dean's old tapes. They didn't talk much, just enjoyed each other's presence and the feeling that their family was whole once again. Maybe it was time to put the past behind them and try to restore what was left of their relationship. Sam was tired of pretending that everyone in his family was dead. Dean was tired of pretending that it didn't hurt him that John was running his own vendetta without thinking twice about his younger son leaving him.

What happened next was just a blur in both of their minds. Dean remembered leaving his brother at the door while going to park the Impala. He remembered the roar of the fire, the wood crackling and the terrifying chill that everything was happening again and he couldn't do anything. Again. He remembered running into that house, while his brother's life was burning to the ground. He remembered grabbing Sammy by the arm when all the young man could do was stare at the love of his life, murdered, stuck to the burning ceiling.

But Sam, oh, Sam remembered the screams and the smell of burnt flesh. He remembered Dean, the panic in his eyes when he shoved him away from the mayhem. And then, all the younger Winchester could think of was saving his son, getting him out of the flaming hell that was his house. He pushed Dean and started running, covering his mouth and nose with his shirt. Sam could hear his baby crying and oh god, what that crying was doing to him.

He practically flew to his room and grabbed one of his green bags, always ready with diapers and some clothes, just in case. Because even after all this time, he still was a hunter at heart. With the bag on his shoulder, he lifted his son carefully into his arms and rushed for the front door where Dean was waiting for him, Sam covered his face so he couldn't see the fire destroying his home. His brother's eyes widened when he saw the infant hidden in Sam's arms but he didn't commented and just got into the car.

When the younger Winchester slammed the door closed on his side sirens started echoing in the night. The Impala's engine roared to life and the two brothers left town, leaving behind Sam's first love and all his hopes of a better future for him and his son.

That day. That special day of November, the 2nd, was not only the day that Dean retrieved Sam, but Dean was also introduced to his nephew, the most adorable and fragile little thing he'd ever seen. On that special day of November, Dean looked away when his baby brother burst into tears, tightening his hold on his now motherless son.

It had been six months. Six long months of mourning, hunting and craving for revenge. But Sam knew better. He knew what a vendetta could do to a child, and he would never, ever put his precious son through the hell that was his own childhood. But it was tempting.

So tempting that Dean had to, on more than one occasion remind him of what he'd left behind and what would happen if he left to chase the son of a bitch who did it. The younger Winchester was thankful but he had yet to stop counting the nights where the nightmares would torture him. The mornings where the only thing he could do was curling into a ball and pray for this endless bad dreams to end.

Meghan sure took after his father, despite having Jess' mother's name: he was growing up, fast and much. Sam's unbalanced mood didn't seem to affect him and beside his own rare nightmares, he was as fine as he could be considering the situation. When the brothers left Palo Alto, Meghan was a chubby little blonde one-year-old boy. They showed up at Pastor Jim's door early in the morning and the good man immediately let them in. Since then, their only concern was to keep Meghan away from all of the chaos that was their lives.

He was now a happy little boy, running all around the church when no one was there or he was quietly watching the people who came to pray. His curly blond hair looked like a mane and reminded his father of Jess'. He had his dimples and green eyes, his patience, kindness and interest in everything.

It hadn't been easy for any of them. Pastor Jim was doing an amazing job while helping them raising little Meghan into the amazing man he one day will be. But Sam was restless and Dean wanted to look for their father. The two brothers needed some time apart, their closeness weighting on each other's nerves. They didn't talk to each other much, mostly because Sam didn't wanted to blame his older brother for this but couldn't help it.

All in all, they were just waiting for the other shoe to drop. Eventually, the other shoe's name was Meg and she was a blond girl from the grocery store. Even the Winchesters weren't that oblivious to false coincidences. She seemed friendly enough and honestly, Sam didn't have anything against her, apart from the hair colour and name. She was working as a waitress in the roadhouse near the store and if it weren't for those details, he would have been happy to get to know her better.

But then, John appeared out of the blue. His body language screamed warnings as he walked in the church. Dean couldn't think of how their father had found them since he didn't answer their calls and they never told him where they were headed. Sam was still at the grocery store when John arrived and it had been a nightmare to explain to him who Meghan was and the whole mess with Sam's fiancé.

When Sam returned, arms full of paper bags and Meg's number in his pocket, all he could find in the church was a horrified Pastor Jim begging for his pardon and a lot of blood. What he couldn't find? Well, that was none other than his brother and his baby boy.