True: Ahehehe, Seddie, :) I'm rough on this couple, sooo... Yeshhh... Hope it isn't TOO terrible. XD (Just so you know, no caps and names and stuff on purpose. I'm not THAT bad at grammar. XD)
Oh... And sorry if I made Carly a little evil, I didn't mean to! Honest! I love Carly, I think she's a good character, I tried not to make her too bad... Let's see if I succeeded...
POV: Third Person.
Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly or it's characters, the rights belong to Dan Schneider.
Summary: "He's been there for her, even if she doesn't appreciate it. He loves her, even if she doesn't love him back. He tries to be something for her, she just treats him like nothing." Seddie one-shot.
sometimes he wishes she's his.
he wishes he could kiss her in public like he can. he wishes he doesn't have to pretend he hates her. he wishes she loved him like he wants her to.
wishes don't always come true.
/ /
"you know she really likes him right?"
it's times like these when he wonders why he ever had feelings for her.
"i know."
she sucks in a breath, and you know she's going to say something she's going to regret in the morning.
"you know she told me she loved him right?"
no, no he didn't know that. it hurts him, they both know that. of course, neither of them would admit it.
"i know."
his heart skips a beat. so this is what lying feels like.
"but that doesn't mean i have to like it."
/ /
"todd asked me out."
she says it so casually, he wonders if she's just saying it to spite him.
"seriously! we have to get you ready!" she's way too happy, even if it's for her best friend being in a new relationship, he has a feeling that she's saying i told you so. "he won't be able to keep his hands off you."
he wonders which he she's talking about. he has a feeling it's himself when her eyes flicker.
"oh, trust me, that boy just wants a piece of mama. who wouldn't?"
he swiftly gets up, slams the door, and there still staring after him, he knows it.
and he likes it, he likes that her attention and thoughts will be on him.
even if only for a little while.
/ /
she's talking about how perfect her date went. she's talking about how no one can make her feel that way (he can make her feel that way, he know he could, if she'd just give him a chance. not that she ever would.) she's talking about how perfect he is.
cause he's just so perfect he can make her eyes light up.
cause he's just so perfect he can make her smile go all the way up to her eyes.
cause he's just so perfect he can make her completely and utterly happy.
he could do that too, if she'd just let him.
but he has a feeling she'd never let him do that.
because he just means nothing to her.
/ /
"missy told me she caught todd and raina making out behind the bleachers during gym."
she's so blunt. she's so relaxed as she says it. she's so uncaring he wonders if she's joking.
"oh no sam! i'm so sorry!" she's says she's sorry all the time, she says it so much. he wonders if the words still hold any meaning.
"nah, it's a'ight. he wasn't that special anyway."
all three of them know that's a lie.
/ /
she comes running to his house in the middle of the night. she was never one to show weakness, especially in front of him. he instantly knows something's wrong when he sees her tear stained face.
"it hurts freddie."
they both know what she's saying, but he doesn't reply, so she just continues.
"it hurts to know todd's happy with someone other than me. it hurts to know he might never have cared about me. it hurts to know i trusted him." she lets in a shaky breath. "it hurts to know that even through all this, i still love him."
yeah, it hurts him too.
"so why are you here?" as soon as he says it, he wishes he could put the words back in his mouth.
she glares at him, and he smiles because it's just so her. "well, if you want me to leave, i'll leave."
"no! that's okay, you don't have to leave."
she crosses her arms. "that's what i thought. anyway i'm here because i need a friend."
"so you came to me? why not carly's?"
"because carly doesn't understand the feeling of heart break."
right now, he's not sure if he should be insulted or complimented. "gee... thanks..."
"i mean, every guy likes her. no one would even think about hurting her. oh, she's carly shay. i mean, really, what's so great about her?"
he bites his lip, though he'd never admit it, he's been wondering the same thing the last few days. so he simply replies with the answer he would've said a few years ago.
"she's smart, she's funny, she's pretty-"
she glares at him, and he can't help but smile at her jealousy. "who asked you?"
"actually, you did."
"do you want me to leave?"
he grins and rolls his eyes. "no, i just love having you here."
"i don't need your sarcasm benson."
"who said i was being sarcastic?"
she's shocked.
he can't believe he said it outloud.
she kisses him.
he kisses back.
she likes it.
he likes it too.
it's like the firescape all over again.
and suddenly, he doesn't just feel like nothing anymore.
/ /
"freddie, we need to talk."
he walks over to the girl he used to love. "hey carls, what's up?"
"sam and todd are going out again."
his breath catches in his throat, his mouth gets dry. "no, she said-"
"i don't care what she said." she tries not to get frustrated, he can tell. "she loves todd. i'm sorry freddie."
"bye carly."
he knows she's telling the truth. they both do.
he just won't admit it.
/ /
he doesn't understand why she keeps breaking his heart. he doesn't understand if she gets some sick pleasure out of it.
she comes to him again, tears in her eyes, saying she wants him back.
he takes her, because he's a love sick fool.
she breaks his heart again, because she's a lost soul.
/ /
it happens twice a month, maybe more.
he wants to say no, he wants to turn her down. but he can't, especially when her blue orbs are so sad.
some say he's just desperate.
he's not desperate.
he's just in love.
/ /
"freddie, please! i love you, not todd! please, please, please!"
"then why do you keep leaving me for him?" for once, he's fighting back. he's going to give him, they both know it. he just wants her to know he's not empty and knows what she's doing.
she looks at him, and she's so helpless. he takes her in his arms.
"thank you fredward..." she smiles at him, and he smiles back, because he loves her, and he's making her happy, not todd.
"i have to go, i'm sorry, i'll be back."
he watches as the door closes. and he chuckles.
"i'm still nothing aren't i?"