Disclaimer: The characters herein do not belong to me, with the exception of Jenny.

A Kerovan Mystery
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Dear...Reader?

Damn, that's not a good salutation either. Judging from the position of the Rebels' Rack, it looks like they're about to explore the planet KO-35 next. The Rebels have actually been there before, and even then it had been deserted due to alien attacks.

The general is Mr. Simms, a mortician with a dark secret. I hope the Rebels don't let their guard down when they face him. They're in for a big surprise for sure.

These are the words of Canis Lupus.
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Jade and Jeice were known as the Colorful Siblings. Even since Jeice left the Ginyu Force, he and his sister had gone on their own adventures. They haven't done so since they joined the Rebel Club. They were missing the old days.

Jade and Jeice were sitting in the bedroom reminiscing about their sibling adventures.

"Remember the time when we tied everyone's shoe laces together?" Jade asked.

"Yeah, that was cool," Jeice replied. "But remember when we put soap in the water fountain? That was the best!"

"I think that was a little too cruel."

"You know, I really miss our adventures."

"Me, too," Jade agreed. "You know, when we get to the next planet, we could ask Jenny if we could take on the general by ourselves."

"Why would she allow it?" Jeice asked.

"Well, if Jenny fights everyone by herself, surely she believes that we can, too," Jade replied.

"Sure, sounds good."

"Let's go to the bridge."

Lately, Jenny's main duty has been to sit on the bridge and wait for Beta's announcement. Quite boring, indeed.

Jade and Jeice entered the bridge to make their request.

"Jenny, we have a request," Jade said.

"Can Jade and I take on the next general by ourselves?" Jeice asked.

Jenny laughed. "Are you nuts?"

"Only about as nuts as you are," Jeice said. "You always take on tough foes by yourself, so why can't we?"

Jenny sighed. "Well, you got me. Okay, I'll send you guys after the next general, okay?"

"Deal!" the Colorful Siblings cried in unison.

Finally, Beta made the long-awaited announcement. "Attention: detecting faint energy readings from the planet ahead."

An image of a planet appeared on the monitor. It was grayish in color.

"You guys ready?" Jenny asked.

"As we'll ever be," Jade said.

"Then let's go!" Jeice cried.

So the Colorful Siblings teleported out of the Rebel Rack and reappeared on the planet's surface. The sky was of the night, and it was rather foggy. The leafless trees were rough and intimidating.

"Phew, it looks like a graveyard out here!" Jade cried.

"I don't think so," Jeice said. "If it was a graveyard, there would be tombstones everywhere."

"Okay, now how about that faint energy reading?" Jade asked.

Jeice pressed a button on his scouter, causing it to beep.

"The faint energy reading is coming from that way," he said, pointing to his right.

Jade and Jeice ran in that direction, trying to point down the energy signal source. Jeice paused abruptly.

"What is it?" Jade asked.

Jeice stared at four people through his scouter lens. The tiny lights in the lens formed a circle around them.

"The scouter says that the energy readings are coming from those people," Jeice said. "Let's check them out."

The siblings walked closer to the people to get a better look at them. The strange group consisted of three men and one woman. One of the men stood up and started walking towards the siblings.

"Uh-oh," Jade said as she and her brother stopped.

The first man detected their nervousness. "Hello," he said. "It's okay, you can approach us anytime. We're always open for new faces."

"Oh, that's good," Jade said. "We were just tracking down a faint energy source."

"And it's coming directly from you guys," Jeice added.

The man stroked his chin. "I don't know. Maybe it's just the life energy in our bodies."

"Could be," Jade agreed. "So, who are you people?"

The first man put his hand to his chest. "I'm James McCloud. And those are my friends over there: John Tanaka, Jack Levin, and Jody Summer."

James McCloud was your ordinary guy, probably around his thirties. He had short brown hair and a fit muscular body. He wore a black leather jacket with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, and he wore white gloves to match. He wore a green suit underneath, complemented with smooth, shiny black boots. Finally, he wore sunglasses on his face. Why he'd wear sunglasses at night was anyone's guess.

John Tanaka appeared to be in his mid-twenties, with short black hair and a skinny body. He wore a white jumpsuit with a blue top, with blue gloves and boots. He wore a pair of headphones with an attached microphone.

Jack Levin was definitely the youngest of the group, appearing to be in his late teens. He had blonde hair and a skinny body. He wore a blue outfit with a jacket with his name printed on the right breast.

Lastly, Jody Summer appeared to be in her twenties, and she had long brown hair and a very athletic body. She wore a white jumpsuit with a pink top.

"We call ourselves the J-Gang because all of our names start with 'J'," James continued. "In order for others to join, their names must start with 'J' also."

"Yeah, ours do," Jade said. "I'm Jade, and this is my brother Jeice."

"All right, new members!" Jack cried as he and the others stood up.

"Not so fast," Jeice said. "We already have a team."

"We're just here to defeat the evil general," Jade added. "Wait, what planet is this? And who is the general here?"

"This is planet KO-35," James told her. "I don't know of any general."

Jack laughed. "These blind bats have no idea what they're going after..."

"Shut up, Jack," Jody said flatly. "You've been here all this time, and you don't have a clue either.

"Okay, fine," Jack grumbled. "But I will tell you this, though..."

"Oh no, not the Mr. Simms story again!" Jody whined.

"Yeah, you've told us at least a zillion times!" John added.

"But our new friends may not have heard the tale," James told them. "Go ahead, Jack."

Jack cleared his throat. "Mr. Simms is a freaky mortician that lives on this planet. He's not exactly your average funeral home owner. Legend has it that he got carried away in his demonology study. One stormy night, he spoke an ancient incantation...one that was said to conjure up the Devil himself."

Suddenly, a thunderclap hit the sky, startling the siblings. However, it didn't seem to bother Jack at all. He continued his story with a maniacal grin on his face.

"Then all of a sudden, the Devil snatched Mr. Simms and dragged him down to the pits of hell, where he'll burn for all eternity!" He let out a roar of laughter. When he calmed down, he spoke again.

"Everyone thought that was the end of Mr. Simms. But everyone was wrong. To this day, Mr. Simms remains in the morgue, playing his organ, which can be heard from outside. Those who've seen him claim that he can transform into a giant demon." Jack sighed. "There, I'm done. Happy now?"

"Yes, very happy," Jody confessed.

Jade and Jeice could only stare, eyes wide open.

"That's not really true, is it?" Jeice asked.

Jack shrugged. "Don't know, but I'm not going up there to find out."

"Sounds like Jack is just a big chicken," John said.

"Not if you are," Jack responded.

"The story is baloney anyway," Jody said. "There's no such things as demons."

"Oh, I beg to differ!" Jeice cried.

"We've been fighting demons for months," Jade added. "Our friends have been fighting them even longer."

"So how could you say that demons don't exist?" John said to Jody. "Just look at this place!"

"Ever since evil conquered the universe, KO-35 has been dark," James said.

"Hell, this is hell right here," Jack said. "Hello, welcome to hell; may I take your order? How do you like your brains, fried or scrambled? Yuk, yuk, yuk!"

"Very funny, Jack," Jody grumbled

"Never mind him," James told the siblings. "Jack loves to make jokes, especially when he meets new friends."

Jeice shot him a look. "Isn't it a little dark to be wearing sunglasses?"

"James never takes off his sunglasses," John replied.

"I just can't be seen without them," James told them.

"But can't you see anything?" Jade asked.

"I see everything."

"James is even more blind than a bat," Jack said. "Even the night sky is too bright for him! Yuk, yuk, yuk!"

"Ha ha! Good one, Jack!" John cried.

"Well, we'd better get going if we're going to complete our mission," Jeice said.

"Aw, I was just having fun," Jade whined.

"We're not here to have fun, sis," Jeice reminded her.

"Well, good luck on your mission," James said. "Sorry we couldn't be of any assistance."

"That's okay," Jade said. "That Mr. Simms story was helpful enough."

"You're welcome!" Jack called.

"Maybe we'll come back later," Jeice said.

"Nice meeting you!" Jade called as the Colorful Siblings walked off.

Meanwhile, Spinal decided to check out the strange planet for himself. Upon his arrival, Spinal noticed something.

"Why does this planet look familiar?" he wondered.

Before he could think about what made the planet so familiar, Spinal heard some strange music. It sounded like...organ music. It came from the morgue at Spinal's left. A long sidewalk path led to it. Defeated by curiosity, Spinal began trudging down the path, stopping at the morgue entrance. He read the large sign posted outside.

MR. SIMMS FUNERAL HOME

Strangely enough, the door was slightly ajar.

"Oooh...I know I shouldn't," Spinal told himself.

But he couldn't help it. Spinal gently pushed the door open, making a loud creak. Quietly, the skeleton warrior stepped inside. It looked like an ordinary funeral home, with the red carpet on the floor, stained-glass windows embedded in the walls, and flower bouquets here and there. Spinal crept down the hall and peered around the door to the left. There was a dark-skinned man playing the organ he had black and gray hair, which curled upwards. He wore a find black suit with a white rose in his lapel. He didn't appear to notice that Spinal was there, much to the little guy's relief.

"That guy must be Mr. Simms," Spinal thought.

He took a hop across the doorway to avoid being spotted. He walked further down the hall, eventually making a right hand turn. Inside the room was sort of cremation chamber. Body cabinets were set up by the wall.

"So this is what happens to dead people nowadays?" he thought.

Instead of searching for the general, Jade and Jeice went into a random building to talk things over. The building was completely abandoned, so it was empty and had no decorations, except for tons of dust.

"So, where do we go from here, big brother?" Jade asked.

"I'm not sure," Jeice said. "There's something fishy about those J-Gang people."

"What's so fishy about them? They seem nice enough to me," Jade said. "They might even be good candidates for Rebel Club membership."

"Absolutely not!" Jeice exclaimed. "Sure, they may seem nice enough, but remember what Canis Lupus said. The universe is very deceptive. Nothing is as it seems."

"Oh, so you're suspicious of those people just because of what Canis said? I just can't believe you, Jeice."

"Just think about it, Jade. Don't you think that Jack seems a little too funny? Don't you think that James seems a little too friendly? I don't even know what to say about Jody and John. In fact, they might be the generals that we have to defeat. Jack probably told us that Mr. Simms story to throw us off."

Jade sighed. "Okay, I see your point. But what are we supposed to do? We have no evidence against them."

"I think we'll pay them another visit," Jeice said. "We'll see if we can fish out any more info from them."

"While we're at it, I'd like to get to the bottom of this Mr. Simms thing," Jade said.

The Colorful Siblings left the empty building to pay another visit to the J-Gang.

Spinal walked deeper into the cremation room. He opened the cremation vault, where ashes covered everything. He reached inside and picked up...a skull! With a shriek, Spinal dropped it and quickly closed the vault.

"Wait a minute," he thought. "Why am I afraid of a skull?"

Without bothering to pursue the answer, Spinal walked over to the body bins and pressed a button on one of them. A body cabinet opened up, and Spinal pulled out an antique jar. Spinal opened it and poured out some ashes. Then he put the jar back into the cabinet (which was only about the size of an office drawer) and closed it. He sighed wearily, then noticed something.

The organ had stopped playing.

Spinal tried to keep himself from getting scared. "Oh well, no one can play the organ 24-7. So dead people are cremated and the ashes are put in jars, which are put in body cabinets."

He opened a few more body cabinets to see different jars. As he explored the cremation room, a voice spoke.

"Can I help you?"

Spinal spun around to see the freaky old man standing in the doorway, a cigar held lightly in his hand. Spinal felt a cold chill racing down his spine.

"My name is Mr. Simms," the man said in a dry voice.

He stepped into the room, and Spinal moved back, trying to stay as far away from him as possible.

"I...I wasn't doing anything," the skeleton warrior stammered.

"Of course you weren't," Mr. Simms said, almost in a whisper. "You were just...exploring."

"Uh...yeah."

The freaky old man smiled, revealing a small gap between his two front teeth. "Since you're so curious, I can give you a tour of the morgue. Unless, of course...you're scared."

"Yeah, I'm scared," Spinal said. The last thing he needed was a tour guide from an old freak.

Mr. Simms inhaled his cigar, then exhaled the smoke. "I'll show you what you should really be scared of."

He grinned as a long fork tongue slithered out between his teeth. Spinal wasn't about to stick around for the rest. Screaming, he ran from the morgue.