MacBradley (a Fullmetal Alchemist style Parody of William Shakespeare's Macbeth)
Act 1, Scene 1
Characters featured in this chapter (Role: FMA character + description):
Witch 1: Edward Elric, a young blond alchemist of 15. Highly cynical, he does not wish to be doing this.
Witch 2: Alphonse Elric, a young blond alchemist of 14, previously stuck in a suit of armor but currently back in his human form for reasons that will not be stated here. Perhaps the most enthusiastic of the three "witches", he is mostly in it for the free kitten "familiar".
Paddock: Alphonse's new grey kitten, named Timmy.
Witch 3: Ling Yao, prince of Xing. Has a split personality where he occasionally goes into "Greed" mode – avoid him when that happens. He is rather bored by this entire production.
Disclaimer: Fullmetal Alchemist was (and is still being) written by Hiromu Arakawa. Macbeth is a play written by William Shakespeare. I am neither of those people. Timmy's my creation, though.
It was a dark and stormy night, as it is often portrayed in scenes such as this. In an empty clearing, some voices could be heard.
"I told you the first time, Al; I don't want to be doing this."
"But Nii-san, we get free kittens from this!"
"I said I don't want to –"
"Nii-san! There are FREE KITTENS!"
Feeling obviously defeated, Ed sighed and sat down. "Fine. But I'm not speaking in Old English or anything like that."
"But that's one of the most fun parts, Nii-san," Al pleaded, stroking his kitten lovingly. "You just have to get into character. Like this –" He then said in an attempt to be ominous (see episode 16), "Fair is foul, and foul is fair, hover through fog and filthy air." He then smiled. "Like that, Nii-san."
"No."
"Oh, come on, please, Nii-san?"
"I said no."
"But –"
"I feel your pain, Ed," Ling said, attempting to trace something into the dirt for no apparent reason. "I never volunteered for this either. Someone just showed up one day and gave Ran Fan and me letters saying that we were to report here."
"I think it was some sort of plot started by the bastard Colonel, personally," Ed muttered coldly, putting his head in his hand. "When I get out of this…"
"It can't have been the Colonel's idea," Al said, still petting the cat. "I saw him just before we got here. He got a letter similar to ours, and he didn't seem too happy about it either. I wouldn't be too happy if I was him, either. After all, his part in all of this doesn't come with a free kitten, now does it?"
"Whatever," Ed replied.
A tumbleweed floated by, and Ed muttered, "Those people mentioned in the letter had better get here soon. The sooner this is all over, the better."
"Now what should I name you?" Alphonse wondered, still stroking the new cat. "Hmm… Oh, I know! I'll call you Timmy. And I'll love you, and hug you, and cuddle you, and feed you, and call you Timmy, and you will be mine, you will be my Timmy, and –"
"Would you please be quiet?" Ling snapped.
Author's Note: