Unseen Enemy

He couldn't put his finger on it, but when he looked at Hiroki these days it felt like the older man was a little distant, or otherwise not the usual Hiro-san that he was used to being around. Had he done something wrong? Was there something weighing on his lover's mind? The tall, dark-haired doctor just couldn't figure it out not matter how hard he thought about it, or how long he observed his lover in silence...but he also failed to find the words to bring it up in conversation. He didn't want to upset Hiroki, and he didn't want to make problems out of something that might just be his imagination, but the longer he let it fester in his mind the harder it was to keep up a casual appearance. That was why, during a walk home through the park on a fairly decent, fall day, Nowaki couldn't take it anymore and very quietly, calmly asked, "Hiro-san...is everything alright?"

"Ehh of course it is, why wouldn't it be?" Hiroki replied automatically, but it was a lie as soon as it left his lips. He couldn't tell Nowaki, his lover had far too much on his plate as it was, he wasn't going to add to it with his measly troubles. He could handle this alone, or so he kept telling himself. But truth be told it was becoming harder and harder to hide. The lack of sleep and stress was catching up to him and as usual he couldn't keep much hidden from Nowaki, not for very long anyway. 'Its stupid really,' he thought angrily, his eyes narrowed. 'Just someones idea of a bad joke, right? That has to be it.' he reasoned.

"C'mon, hurry up you big loaf, we're almost home!" he called jogging ahead in an attempt to distract his lover from this particular train of thought.

Taking a few long, strong strides Nowaki easily caught up with Hiroki, adorning a serious, but soft expression as he grabbed onto the older man's coat sleeve, looking him straight in the face. When the other managed to look him in the eye as well, Nowaki's brow unwittingly furrowed a little, making him look uncharacteristically sad and almost nervous; it didn't help that, as he stared at the other, his gaze kept jumping from one of the professor's eyes to the other, showcasing how unsure he was in that moment. "Please be honest with me, Hiro-san," he said earnestly, sounding almost frightened. "Did I do something wrong? Are you unhappy for some reason? I need to know..."

"What? No! No of course not!" He was quick to reassure the other man. He was sure he was going to be drilled for the truth but this sudden confession of uncertainty and worry had completely caught him unawares. He took a moment to compose himself, he needed to be sure Nowaki understood him. "Listen to me you have done nothing wrong." he said his eyes alight with just how serious he was. "You hear me nothing." He paused a moment before saying the next part in a low, suddenly shy voice. "In fact your so much more amazing than I could have ever hoped for."

"Listen, I'll tell you what is going on, but only if you promise e you wont freak out or become over protective, okay? It's probably just someone's idea of a bad joke anyway." Hiroki promised a pleading, searching look in his eye. He needed Nowaki's word, and he hoped he get it. To be honest he desperately wanted to tell his lover what was going on. Secrets and miscommunication were never a good thing in their relationship.

On the one hand Nowaki was ultimately relieved that there was nothing wrong between the two of them, and he hadn't made a mistake somewhere and upset his lover; on the other hand, now there was something he had no idea what it was, and he was being asked to promise not to be overly protective or freak out over it. The doctor had no idea what to expect. Swallowing his own doubts and uncertainty, Nowaki said, "Okay, I promise...please tell me, Hiro-san," hoping that it was indeed just a 'bad joke' as Hiroki had put it, whatever it was that was the matter.

"Well…" he began, suddenly unsure of how to even say what he needed to say. 'Might as well just be blunt about it, skirting around the full story will only complicate things' he decided. He took a moment to clear his voice and gather his thoughts before starting again. "You see that last couple of weeks, say maybe the last three to four, I have been receiving…notes of an unpleasant kind at my work inbox. I don't know who they are from, but from the writing style it seems to be the same person. Its strange really, they piece their words together from newspaper clippings. This isn't an old fashioned movie, who even really does that anymore?" Hiroki finished, being a bit vague and seemingly trying to lighten the situation with his half hearted jab in regards to the notes' creation. "Like I said, nothing to be worried about, I'm sure." he added with a lackluster smile on his face and uncertainty in his eyes.

Nowaki wished he hadn't made that promise. Usually he was fairly composed and knew how to carry himself throughout situations, but it was things like this, things that had to do with his beloved, that made him lose all of that and want to react on the first instinct that sprouted inside of him. He had to clench his fists just to keep from rushing off to the school Hiroki worked at and...well, he'd think of something to do that would make everything okay; he was somehow sure of that, if he did run off. But Nowaki didn't move. In fact, the doctor somehow even managed to keep his emotions fairly under control, or at least look like he was regardless of his tightened grip. "Hiro-san..." he began, taking a moment to construct in his mind what to say first. "This /is/ something to be worried about...that's not normal." Against his best efforts Nowaki's brow furrowed worriedly, and he only loosened his grip to gently hold onto the sides of either of his lover's arms so that he had some kind of contact with him; he felt, in that moment, he just had to have Hiroki at arm's length so that, if something somehow came out of nowhere to hurt him, he could protect him without fail. "What did the letters say exactly?" he asked quietly, forcing himself to remain as calm as he could be for the other man's sake.

Hiroki could see just how much Nowaki was restraining himself and so he decided that he needed to answer his concerned lovers question. Regardless of how much he wished he could do anything but. "Well all the letters have said is 'DIE HIROKI KAMJIOU, DIE!'" He said emotionlessly. "But like I said before, it must just be a joke!" he was quick to add, he hated having Nowaki worry.

After hearing this Nowaki could no longer keep a calm face, his widened eyes staring straight into his lover's face; there was no way that this was something he was just going to allow to be taken as a joke. Joke or not, someone was suggesting Hiroki should die, and that was the worst thing imaginable that Nowaki could think of. Shaking his head, although he wasn't sure why, the midnight-haired doctor pulled his lover close and buried his face against the top of his head. "I-I know you said not to be overly-protective, Hiro-san...but that's...I can't stand the thought of you dy...going away. Practical joke or not I refuse to let anything happen to you," he said in such a tiny voice only Hiroki could've heard him, almost sounding something akin to a lost child.

"No-Nowaki?" Hiroki said in surprise as he was suddenly engulfed by the other mans arms. For a few lengthy minutes Hiroki just stayed as he was snuggle tightly into his lovers strong chest, and surrounded by loving arms. Finally he spoke. "Listen Nowaki, I'm sure its really nothing to be worried about, so I don't want you to worry to much about it, okay?" he pleaded, pulling back a bit to look into his lover's eyes.

He could understand why Hiroki wasn't making a huge deal out of this, he really could, but to Nowaki any threat to his lover was as good as a threat to himself; joke or not it didn't matter to him one bit, he took it all seriously. Furrowing his brow a bit, his expression trying to show that he was going to worry regardless, he stared into the smaller man's eyes for a long, silent moment, finding that his own face was relaxing the longer he stared...not that his worry lessened. Nowaki merely realized that appearing all concerned wasn't getting his message across any easier, so he sighed gently and lowered his head, his bangs falling effortlessly into his midnight-coloured eyes.

"Hiro-san..." he began softly, clenching a little tighter at his lover. "I'm trying not to worry so much, I really am, but you have to understand..." Nowaki paused as he formed the words in his mind, needing that single moment to formulate how best to say why he was so fretful over this whole thing. "My world revolves around Hiro-san, always and forever. If anything causes my world to stop spinning I'll be stuck in a terrible standstill, with no way to begin again. If only this...please don't forget."

Hiroki had no adequate verbal response for his lovers words. His mouth fell agape, his eyes widening, and his cheeks becoming a brilliant rosy color. "Un…er…Nowa…I…er" he stuttered out, completely thrown off by his love as usual. He placed a hand onto his chest, over his now racing heart. How was it that Nowaki was always able to do this to him? A minute ago he had been concerned with dulling his lovers concerns over this matter, but now he had been utterly engulfed but his love for this man, and the honesty of his words. And at this moment, those words were all that filled his mind, pushing all his previous concerns to the side. "Nowaki…how do you do that…?" he mumbled, lowering his head as his loves words echoed in his mind.

Lifting his face so that he could stare into Hiroki's, Nowaki furrowed his brow again, but this time in an inquiring manner; he honestly didn't know what the other man was talking about. How did he do what? Had he made his Hiro-san mad? Or maybe he was being too embarrassing like he was always being told he could be...Nowaki was afraid that he'd done something wrong, and now he was worried over something else entirely, though not once did his concern for Hiroki fade away. "What is it that I do?" he asked softly, deciding it best to just flat out ask, rather than let himself fester in disconcertment.

Hiroki started into the eye of the man he loved, seeing the confusion there and smiling slightly as he stepped closer an placed a hand against his love's face softly.

"What I meant is how do you always-regardless of the situation- manage to say the perfect thing that somehow always makes it okay again?" he clarified, realizing belatedly that Nowaki being, well Nowaki would jump to the wrong conclusions and start to worry about the smallest of things if left to his own devices with such a vague comment for too long.

Relaxing his face the moment Hiroki's soft hand touched his cheek, Nowaki didn't know he had this ability, but as a smile pushed up the corners of his mouth he was merely thankful that he did; if anything he did could put his lover's mind at ease than he was happy he could do it. However, there was still the concern of the note, and Nowaki gently placed a hand over the professor's as his expression turned back to a worried one, however a little less so than it'd been before. "I only say what I feel, and I feel that you /are/ my world, and a threat against you is as good as a threat against me. Please...just promise me you'll call me if you need anything, even if you may think it's stupid; I don't care, I'll be there in a moment," he said softly.

His eyes held a serious look for a moment before he replied with a simple. "I know."

Some time followed after in which Hiroki's eye softened as he locked gazes with the man for many countless minutes. "I will. You have my word." he promised, cupping Nowaki's cheek for a moment before sliding his hand into his hair. His eyes searched Nowaki's for a few moments as he closed the distance between the two. "Always." he added a moment before he connected their lips in a kiss of simple love and honesty.