Gold sat in the car, nerves far from easy. He and Belle had driven to the Sheriff's Office, Belle excited and Gold's mind far from easy. They were adopting a daughter today. Bae's half-sister, Joanna. Milah and Killian's daughter. The paperwork had been finalized the previous day. He and Belle walked in, Belle's arm through his. Milah and Killian were already there on the opposite side of the room, little Joanna standing between them. Killian's hand was on his daughter's shoulder and Gold didn't think he'd ever seen the man look so remorseful. Milah, however, was as unfeeling as ever. Joanna's eyes were full of tears and her clothes drab.
Miss Swan stood at her desk in the middle of the room. She squatted down until she was at eye level with Joanna,
"Alright kid, come meet your new parents." The little girl clung to Killian's sword sheath.
"Daddy, don't make me go." she whispered. Killian bent down to his little girl until he was at eye level with her,
"I know, sweetheart. And your Mommy and I love you very much," Joanna looked up at Milah who nodded encouraging at Killian's word. Joanna returned her tearful gaze to Killian as he continued, "But we also want what's best for you. And sailing isn't best for you. We want you to have friends and go to school. You can't do that on a ship."
"But why can't you come with me?" she asked, clutching at Killian He swept her into his arms and picked her up,
"Because I can't." he said simply.
"But why?"
"It's complicated." said Milah, stepping forward and putting a hand on her daughter's arm. Joanna turned and glared at her mother,
"You're not my mommy. I don't love you." she said. Killian looked down at his little girl,
"She is your mommy and you do love her. She wants what's best for you, just like I do. Now," he set Joanna back on the ground, "You be a strong little girl, okay? Be Daddy's girl." he said. Joanna nodded. Emma stepped forward,
"Joanna, it's time to go." she said. Killian reluctantly let go of his little girl. Joanna slowly turned around and faced Belle and Rumpelstiltskin. Her teddy bear was clutched tight at her side as Joanna walked across the room. At last, she stood before her new parents. She surveyed them with a critical eye that she certainly got from her father,
"You're not my daddy. And you're not my mommy." she stated. Belle nodded at the little girl, masking her pain at Joanna's words,
"That's right. My name is Belle and this is Rumpelstiltskin." she said. Joanna stuck out her hand,
"Nice to meet you." Belle bent down and shook her hand,
"It's my pleasure." Joanna looked up at Rumpelstiltskin and held her hand out to him,
"Nice to meet you." With a grimace, Rumpelstiltskin leaned over and shook Joanna's hand,
"Pleasure." Joanna turned to look at Belle,
"Will I ever see my daddy again?" Belle looked at Killian, who gave a tiny nod as Milah gave an equally tiny shake of the head. Belle looked at Joanna,
"We'll see." she said. Killian crossed the room, carrying a hug bag of Joanna's things. He stopped in front of Rumpelstiltskin and the two stared at each other. Belle watched carefully, ready to intervene if necessary. Killian had suspiciously bright eyes as he handed Rumpelstiltskin the bag and said,
"Take care of her."
Rumpelstiltskin nodded and that was that. Killian helped Milah into her coat and the two left, each taking one last look at Joanna. The little girl waved to her parents. Once Killian and Milah were out of sight, Joana held her hands up to Belle,
"I'm ready to go now."
"That's good, because it is time to go." Belle helped Joanna with her coat as Rumpelstiltskin checked with Emma to be sure that there was nothing else to do.
"I'll be checking on Joanna some time next week." she said and Rumpelstiltskin nodded. As he and Belle left, Joanna still holding tight to Belle's hand, Rumpelstiltskin felt the woman's wary eyes on the back of his head. He wasn't surprised at her mistrust. He'd never made a display of his kindness. Rumpelstiltskin had had to fight long and hard to convince Emma, who obviously knew about the fiasco with Ashley's baby. It had taken a lot to convince her that he had entirely innocent reasons for wanting to adopt a child. In the end, Rumpelstiltskin believed that it was more Emma's hate for Killian Jones and Belle's infertility that had finally persuaded the sheriff to allow the adoption.
Rumpelstiltskin drove the car home that day, Belle beside him and Joanna in the back. The ride was quiet, as was dinner. They picked up food on the way home, a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for Joanna and a hamburger each for Rumpelstiltskin and Belle. They sat around the table that night. Once everyone was finished eating and the silence unbearable, Belle said,
"Would you like to see your room, Joanna?"
"Yes please." The girl stood and cleared her plate, setting it on the counter beside the sink. As she went upstairs, Rumpelstiltskin mused they might have brought home a different girl from the child clinging to Jones earlier that day. This Joanna was quiet, polite. Nothing like the impetuous girl from earlier. As Belle walked Joanna upstairs, Rumpelstiltskin shook his head. The Joanna was so different from the child Bae had been. He sunk his head into his hands.
Belle had always wanted children. Even at the Dark Castle, she had occasionally mentioned a future containing children. Back then, Rumpelstiltskin had even allowed himself to occasionally daydream of a little girl with Belle's curls and his eyes from before his Dark days. Those dreams were dead now, of course. He'd never told Belle; it'd break her heart. When Doctor Whale had told them of her infertility, Rumpelstiltskin had held her as she cried. The doctor reasoned it was due to the almost thirty years of imprisonment and malnourishment that caused some sort of malfunction in her reproductive system. Belle could never have children and if she did become pregnant, it would be life-threatening for both her and the child. When news reached the couple that Milah and Killian had one too many on their ship, Rumpelstiltskin had called Milah immediately to set up a meeting. That was almost three months ago.
And here they were. Belle came downstairs from putting Joanna to bed and sat down opposite Rumpelstiltskin. He reached over and covered her hand with his,
"Are you happy?"
"Yes." she said and Rumpelstiltskin could tell it was true. Belle was practically glowing as she continued, "Joanna fell asleep in the middle of her bedtime story."
"That's good." said Gold, taking a gulp of tea. They fell into silence for a moment, the soft ticking of the clock the only sound in the kitchen. Belle bit her lip,
"Are you alright with this?" she asked in a rush. Gold frowned,
"Alright with what?"
"It's just, since we brought Joanna home, you've been a little distant. I was just…is this okay?" she asked, worrying her lip. Rumpelstiltskin couldn't believe it. How could Belle ever think he thought this was a mistake? He shook his head,
"No! I mean, yes, this is okay. It's just been a while since I've tried raising a child, sweetheart. Just brings back…memories." he said quietly. Almost to himself, he added, "She's three years younger than Bae was when he left." Belle nodded and stood, walking around the table until she was behind Rumpelstiltskin's chair. She started rubbing his shoulders and Belle felt him relax beneath her touch. She leaned in and whispered in his ear, her breath light across his skin,
"I'm sorry. I should have thought of that."
"Nonsense, sweetheart. You had your own concerns." he said, leaning back so he was looking at Belle's upside-down face. She smiled and kissed him in thanks. She pulled back, then went in for another kiss. This time she gently took his bottom lip between her teeth and pulled ever so slightly, just enough to make him groan. Belle licked the lip in apology.
"You know, this upside-down thing certainly opens up a lot of new possibilities." Gold growled up at her, the words sending a shiver down Belle's spine. She giggled and reached her hands up to his shoulders. She rubbed them and let her hands snake down over his chest, over his soft stomach, and just as her hands were about to reach their attentive destination, Belle happened to look up. She sprang back from Gold like he burned her,
"What is it, sweetie?" she said. Gold opened his eyes and look over. Joanna was on the stairs, clad in her pajamas and carrying a worn teddy bear.
"I'm thirsty. May I please have a glass of water?" she said quietly. Belle nodded and got the girl a glass, filling it with water from the tap. Joanna stared at Mr. Gold as Belle brought the girl her water. Even when Joanna had her drink, she still stared at Mr. Gold, like she was trying to find what was underneath his bravado. At last, he scowled at the girl, putting his most frightening face. Joanna laughed and scampered up the stairs. Gold scowled further when the little girl failed to be intimidated. Belle laughed and walked back to her place behind his chair,
"She'll have you around her finger in a week."
That night, Gold lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. Belle was asleep beside him, her hair tickling his shoulder. But it wasn't that that kept him awake. It was the nine-year-old girl down the hall, the one with the blond hair and blue eyes that confused him so much.
Milah's daughter. Jones's daughter. She was his now. He had a daughter. Not biologically, of course, but in the ways that mattered. He nodded to himself. No matter the girl's heritage, Joanna was his and Belle's daughter now. Gold rolled over to face Belle and settled in, already feeling sleepy.
When Gold was just moments from falling asleep, there was a quiet whisper from the doorway,
"Hello?" Gold brushed it off at first, but when he heard it again, the most awake section of his brain registered that it was Joanna. He slowly sat up, careful not to wake Belle.
"Joanna?" he whispered. The shadow in the doorway stepped forward,
"Rumpelstiltskin?" Gold carefully swung his legs out of bed, grateful that Belle had made him put on pants after their nocturnal exercises. He pulled on his bathrobe and grabbed his cane before he made his way to the door,
"We'll talk out here." he whispered. Gold carefully pulled the door closed behind him before he turned to Joanna, "What is it?"
"Can we turn a light on?" asked the girl, ignoring Gold's question. Gold said nothing as he led Joanna back to her room, flicking on the light as they went in. He closed the door behind him and turned to Joanna, speaking in a regular voice,
"What is it?"
"I…" the girl looked at her feet and mumbled something. Gold leaned forward,
"What?"
"I had a nightmare." she said, glaring up at him, practically daring him to laugh at her. Gold stood silent for a moment, frozen. How was he supposed to deal with this? It had been almost three hundred years since Bae had had a nightmare. With Bae, he'd just held him until the boy fell asleep. But was Joanna different? They were just a few steps short of strangers. Gold slowly sat at the foot of Joanna's bed. At last he said,
"Okay. What did Milah do when you had a nightmare?" Joanna shook her head,
"She didn't help. Daddy helped with the nightmares. We'd go above deck and watch the stars while he told me a story until I fell asleep." said Joanna. Gold nodded, grateful Joanna at least knew what she wanted.
"Well, we can't go outside, but I can tell you a story. Would you like that?" he said hesitantly. Joanna nodded. She crossed to the other side of the room and opened the blinds, revealing the woods overlooked by the full moon and stars. The girl crawled back into bed, pulling the covers up to her chin. Gold asked, "Would you like me to turn off the lights?"
"Yes please." said Joanna. Gold stood with a wince and flicked off the light by the door. He returned to the end of Joanna's bed, his mind already searching for stories. There were so many he couldn't tell, too dark for a child's imagination at this time of night. Finally, one came to mind. Gold smiled as he said,
"Once upon a time, in a faraway land, there lived a monster." Joanna cracked an eye open and squinted at him,
"That's not a good beginning."
"It's a good story." said Gold. Joanna eyed him suspiciously before shrugging and closing her eyes. Gold continued, "There was a monster. This monster was vicious, thought not without mercy. He was feared by all, yet the kingdoms needed him. He was only called times of distress. Yet, this monster was lonely. He had been alone for hundreds of years, alone with his guilt and sorrow." Gold trailed off as his mind went back to those years. He hadn't realized how lonely he was until Belle was there. Gold quickly shook off his thoughts and continued the story,
"One day, this monster was summoned to court. The king there needed help. His lands were flooded with ogres and no army had been able to vanquish them. The king needed the monster's help. But this monster was no fool. He knew how the king feared him, how desperate the king was. So the monster demanded payment: the king's daughter, for the safety of his lands. The king refused, like a good father. But the king's daughter, the princess, was there at court. She stepped forward and accepted the monster's deal. The king tried to make her take back her agreement, but the deal was struck. The monster led away the princess to be the caretaker of his castle. The princess was brace, so very brace she didn't cry as the monster stole her away from the only life she knew.
"Months passed with the princess performing her duties at the castle. She cleaned and washed and cooked, not once complaining. During this time, the monster came to love her. He said nothing, for who could ever come to love a monster like him?
"One day, the monster could take it no longer. He sent the princess out to fetch straw, knowing that she would take her chance at freedom. The monster was sad to see the princess go, but he knew it was for her own good. Still, as he watched the princess leave, the monster still hoped she'd return." Joanna was almost certainly asleep by then, her breathing evening out and face relaxing. Rumpelstiltskin slowly stood, careful to jostle the bed as little as possible. Joanna turned slowly and said sleepily,
"What happened then?" Rumpelstiltskin sighed to himself, sitting back down. This was his least favorite part of the story. But he couldn't ell Joanna this part. It was too sad for a children's bedtime story. Making it up as he went, telling the story as it would have happened had he not been a fool, Rumpelstiltskin continued,
"Late that night, the monster was surprised to see the princess returning with her basket of straw. He ran downstairs to greet her, hugging her tight as she entered the door. The princess took the monster's head in her hands and kissed him. The monster felt himself start tingling and when the princess broke the kiss, she was startled to see the monster had turned into a man. She kissed him again, laughing, 'I knew it.' she said, 'True Love's Kiss can break any curse.' The man who was a monster married the princess and they lived happily ever after. The end." Rumpelstiltskin stood again, this time able to leave the room. Joanna was fast asleep and as he returned to his and Belle's bedroom, he hoped to be sleeping soon as well. He crawled under the covers and Belle was immediately at his back, snuggling against him. Rumpelstiltskin smiled at his sleeping beauty. His beautiful princess who loved a monster.